AN: hey guys, so I have a few chapters written out already so I'll be updating every 3-4 days. It's a pretty long story! So enjoy and please review and tell me what you think! Thanks : )
Three hours later Ashley's Porsche came to a skidding halt right outside of Spencer's house.
Ashley leaned in and hugged Spencer tightly. Spencer reciprocated the hug and thanked Ashley for "one of the best days she's had in a while".
Spencer got out of the car and walked up to the door in complete bliss. She was so happy she wouldn't ever have to wait for Glenn again after school. Earlier when they were walking down the boardwalk in Venice Beach Ashley had offered to take Spencer home from school every day. Spencer quickly obliged and bought Ashley a whole bag of cotton candy to show her appreciation.
When Spencer reached the door she looked back and waved at Ashley who was waiting for her to get inside. Ashley waved back blew Spencer a kiss and sped off down the street.
"Spencer, is that you?" Paula asked carrying a plate of food in her hand.
"Yeah mom, I got a ride home with my friend Ashley so I didn't have to wait for Glenn."
"Well Glenn's already home. I'm just glad you're safe. Sit down your father is serving dinner now." Paula instructed Spencer as she placed the food on Spencer's placemat.
"Mexican tonight family!" Arthur Carlin singsonged as he rounded the corner from the kitchen and placed the meal in the center of the table. "Dig in!"
"Ahem, not before grace is said" Paula corrected Arthur and she grabbed Clay and Arthur's hand.
"Right" Arthur mumbled as Paula said a quick grace praising God for all this food.
"So, how was everyone's first day!" Arthur asked raising a burrito to his mouth.
One by one Clay, Glenn and Spencer all detailed the exact contents of their day. It ranged from how many girl's numbers Glenn had gotten, to how many classes Clay felt prepared in, to exactly what Spencer did with this "Ashley girl".
Near the end of dinner Spencer felt her phone vibrating from her pocket. She slid it out and looked at the caller Id.
"Madison Duarte!" Spencer's heart jumped as she saw who was calling.
"May I be excused? I've a lot of homework" Spencer didn't even wait for an answer as she bounded up to her room, closed the door and answered the phone on the last ring.
"Hey Madison what's up" Spencer asked taking quiet breathes in an attempt to calm her nerves.
"Nothing much. Aiden and I are fighting and I just felt like talking to someone." Madison sounded sad and Spencer had the strongest urge to punch out Aiden.
"I'm sorry, do you want to talk about it?" Spencer hoped she'd say no. She didn't think she'd be able to listen to Madison complain about a guy to her.
Because I just want the conversation to me about me, thats all. Not about a guy. It's not like I like her or anything. She's just nice. This is how everyone feels about their friends...right? Spencer thought.
"I'd rather not. But thanks you're really sweet" Spencer could envision Madison smiling on the other end of the phone and Spencer couldn't help but smile too.
"So, we need to learn more about each other" Madison urged.
"What do you wanna play 21 questions or something?" Spencer suggested half kidding.
"The one where you think of an object and everyone tries to guess it?"
"Um, we could do that. But no I was thinking more along the lines of questions to get to know each other. It usually takes forever " Spencer giggled and absentmindedly started flipping through an old photo album
"Haha oh that one, okay! Why not? That sounds fun! How about this I'll just ask you ten questions and then you can ask me ten so we don't have to play the full game."
"Okay. You go first!" Spencer said flipping another page of the photo album. It was a picture of her as a young child. Her eyes were so blue and so big with hope. Spencer thought about all she had been through since that picture was taken, especially with what happened with Sarah. She wondered if she still possessed those hopeful big blue eyes or if life had hardened them.
"Okay. Are you a virgin?" Madison asked. "The standard first question!"
"Easy. Yes." Spencer said thinking of the one boyfriend she had back in Ohio. James Parker was possibly the hottest guy in their grade. He had been interested in Spencer since 5th grade and Spencer continuously denied him until freshman year. Someone had remarked, "What are you gay?" when Spencer had said she didn't want to date James. The next day Spencer walked up to James and kissed him in front of everyone. They dated for 8 long months. "Are you a virgin?" Spencer asked.
"No." Madison sighed and quickly asked, "What's your biggest regret?"
Spencer lifted her eyes to a picture of her and Jamie on her nightstand. She thought about leaving Jamie. She knew that was a huge regret and not continuing acting was another.
But then again Spencer breathed in sharply as her eyes landed on the next page of the photo album, those don't compare to this regret. A gorgeous blonde haired girl was starring back at Spencer with the most beautiful hazel eyes she'd ever seen. The girl was in mid laughter and a slightly smaller blonde haired blue-eyed girl hung from around her neck.
It was a picture of Spencer and Sarah before everything changed and turned horrendous. Spencer absentmindedly touched her left wrist and realized Madison was still waiting for an answer. "Losing touch with my friend Sarah, but I can't change it." Spencer finally admitted.
"Who did you lose your virginity to?" Spencer asked Madison dying to know whom she'd been so intimate with.
"Aiden. Summer before last" Madison answered robotically. "Have you ever dated someone of another race?"
"Yeah, my ex-boyfriend James was African American. And really gorgeous, he played soccer and lacrosse." Spencer thought for a while and then asked, "What was your first date like?"
"Well" Madison began "It was before Aiden. Someone I really cared about and we just spent the whole night lying in this field underneath the stars. I got my first kiss that night. I had just turned 14 and it was right before Aiden and I got together. It was the best night of my life and it makes me really upset we don't keep in contact anymore." Madison finished obvious sadness in her voice. "What was the most embarrassing moment of your life?"
Spencer thought over the last sixteen years of her life and one instance stood out against the rest, but she could never tell Madison. The only person she'd ever told was Jamie and that's how it was going to stay. Finally she found a suitable story to tell Madison. "Um, I was in fifth grade and I was playing on the monkey bars. I moved my body so my knees were hanging from the bar and I was upside down. Sadly, I wasn't wearing a bra yet and my shirt came up. I think that's why James liked me so much! I was the first girl whose boobs, if you can even call what I had back then boobs, he'd ever seen." Spencer giggled remembering the incident. Now it didn't seem so bad as it had that day. She remembered going home crying and her mother made her cookies and tea.
"Sooo" Spencer was dying to ask Madison whom this perfect guy was that got to lay with her under the stars but she didn't want to pry or seem jealous. So she settled on "What's your biggest pet peeve?"
"Oh man! Slow drivers! I cannot STAND people who drive slowly. I mean LA traffic is bad enough! Do people really feel the need to slow it down even more by going ten miles under the speed limit!" Madison said exasperatedly. "What's one physical feature you'd like to change about yourself?"
"I keep getting all the hard questions!" Spencer laughed.
"Well that's your own fault! You can ask me hard questions too!" Madison replied.
"Well" Spencer pondered running a hand over the last picture taped to the back of her photo album. It was from when she had graduated eighth grade. A red and puffy scar stood out obviously against her pale chin. Spencer always hated how that scar made her face look. A few months before graduation Spencer had been running down the hallway to meet Jamie and tell her some rumor she just heard.
But, she ran directly towards her locker just in time for Jamie to swing it open and accidentally whack her in the chin. The edge of the locker cut her skin so deeply it hit bone and she had to be rushed to the hospital and given over 20 stitches. To this day Spencer hated that scar and Jamie always joked, "at least you'll always have me!"
"This scar on my chin." Spencer voiced.
"Girl, I didn't even see any scar!" Madison retorted "and besides scars are sexy" Spencer's heart began to race so fast she felt like she'd just downed three red bulls. Usually she covered her scar completely with make up.
Maybe I'll leave it noticeable tomorrow...you know in an attempt to accept myself of course. Not because Madison said scars were sexy...no definitely not.
"Thanks." Spencer said quietly "What do you want most in life?" Spencer said asking the hardest question she could think of at the time.
"To be accepted" Madison answered effortlessly.
"What do you mean?" Spencer questioned perplexed.
"Careful Spence that's two questions! But I want to be able to stand up for myself and to be confident all the time. I want to be able to present myself to the world and be able to honestly say love me or hate me because it doesn't impact me. I want to be completely comfortable in my own skin" Madison finished.
"And you don't have that now?" Spencer asked furrowing her brows.
"Do you really want to ask a third question in succession?"
"Fine, fine I withdrawal my prior question". Spencer said blushing.
"Alright. Well, how about you Carlin? What is it that you want most in this life?"
Spencer thought for a moment and said "True love"
"Don't we all." Madison agreed and continued, "Since you asked me two questions in a row I get to say another. Have you ever been in love?"
Spencer hesitated for a moment playing with the fringes of her baby blue rug. "Maybe, but I don't know if it was even real. It was unrequited if anything and ended horribly."
"I'm sorry Spencer. That must have been horrible" Madison said in a soft voice.
"Yeah. But I'm much better now. Anyway, here's a generic question. Are you genuinely happy?"
There was a thirty second pause before Madison began "Sometimes. But mostly I feel like something's missing. I wish certain things were different. Tell me something nobody else knows about you"
Spencer looked around the room thinking about something nobody else knew...besides the obvious. "Well" Spencer prefaced her statement "there's not much that Jamie doesn't know about me. So I'll tell you something only she knows. Clay wasn't a random adoption. My mother's younger sister Becky married an African American man named Daniel. They were so in love. Just seeing pictures of them together you can tell how much in love they truly were. They got married right after college and my grandma disowned her. She forbade her from ever returning to her home because she married outside racial boundaries. This caused a huge strain on my family. My mom hated my grandmother for excommunicating my sister and for holding such oppressive views. She was the only one out of her three siblings who stayed close to Becky." Spencer sighed. "Anyway, Becky got pregnant a year after they were married but there were complications. Ultimately, she died in childbirth. So Danny cared for Clay for a few months. But he was so overcome with sadness that he left Clay at our house one day. He said he was going to the gym and instead he went home and hung himself." Spencer's eyes began to prick with tears. "My mom had a nervous breakdown after that and it was really difficult growing up in the environment. But it's been 18 years since then, and our family has finally healed." Spencer finished.
"Why did you tell me all of that?" Madison sounded shocked.
"Because I feel comfortable with you. And, that was two questions" Spencer said poking fun at Madison's prior comment.
"But since I told you about my family, what's your family life like?"
"Well I live with my mom, step dad and step brother. Pretty basic."
"Oh" Spencer said sensing she may have over stepped her boundaries with that question. "This is your last question!"
"No, No you have two more left! You go first! I want to go last."
"Haha alright. If you weren't on the phone with me right now who would you be talking to?"
"I'm not sure. I mean the most likely person would be Aiden. We'd be trying to talk through this fight. I've already ignored three of his calls." Spencer couldn't help but brighten at that statement. "But" Madison continued, "sometimes I really like talking to my half-brother Jay."
"Oh you didn't mention him earlier. He doesn't live with you?" Spencer asked as she sat down on her bed.
"That was your final question! But nah, he lives with his father and stepmother in Whittier so I see him pretty often. Are you ready for your last question?"
"Yeah" Spencer said resting her head on her pillow.
"Are you attracted to me?"
Time seemed to advance in slow motion. Spencer shot up in bed and her mind began racing. It seemed to take Spencer a lifetime to register what Madison was asking.
"Whaaa?" was all Spencer could mutter in response.
"Oh relax Carlin. I think you're afraid of me turning you. But to be fair that was my last question and you did answer."
"Huh?" Spencer voiced clearly confused by the circumstance.
"Don't worry about it Spence" Madison reassured her. "Oh man. It's getting late and I've about 3 summer books to read for tomorrow so I'll catch you in homeroom!"
"Oh, Okay. Goodnight Madison" was all Spencer could say as she clicked the end button on her phone.
What the hell just happened? Was Madison flirting with me? LA is going to be the death of me.
Spencer settled back down onto her bed and reached for a book. She played the conversation over and over in her mind until she eventually fell asleep.
After that day Spencer fell into a comfortable routine. Ashley would pick her up from school and they would tour LA, hang out in her room listening to music, or on extremely rare occasions do homework. Then she'd go home eat dinner and get a call from Madison every single night. It was slowly turning out to be the best year of Spencer Carlin's life. She had a best friend in Ashley and a whatever-it-was in Madison and she felt she could take on the world.