Disclaimer: If Axis Powers Hetalia were mine, I wouldn't need to write fanfics. If any of these songs were mine, I wouldn't be writing fanfics.

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Minimal fluff 09!

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Of Seamen and Landlubbers 4

While they had managed to get somewhat of a headstart, England knew they were on the losing side of the battle. Greece's ships were gaining a good amount of ground every few minutes. Ahead was clear, but they couldn't outrun Greece forever. Sooner or later they would hit land and while trying to maneuver their way around said land, Greece would catch up to them. Desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Canada. Tell France that we've got to use them."

Canada's eyes opened wide behind his glasses. "England, we only have two of them and you know how bad of a shot France is!"

"Fine. Then you shoot them." Canada's shock seemed to grow.

"But England! We only have two of them!"

"Shut up! At this point, we don't have a choice. We have to use the missiles." While all ships, the UKB included, were stocked with cannonballs for cannons, they had managed to pilfer some sharpened missiles from China, where the technology was slowly developing. England had managed to stop him from mass producing, only selling to the UKB, so he was confident that Greece wouldn't be able to use the same weapon at them. Throw as many rounded objects as you like; he was pretty sure he could collapse both ships with the artillery he had.

Canada opened his mouth to object but thought better of it. "Alright, then, but can you slow the ship a bit? I tend to get shaky if we're going too fast."

"Tell France. And be quick about it." Canada may not be one of many words, tending often to talk to Kumajiro the bear, but he was a great shot. England barked further orders to the panicked crew as Canada dashed off below deck. The ship started on a curved course, allowing for Canada to have better range and it pulled back, steering the UKB perpendicular to the two ships coming at them.

BOOM! The UKB rocked with the force of the first shot missile and England smirked satisfactedly as a cloud of flames appeared on the side of one of the ships and even Poseidon seemed to know of its doom as the waves tossed the battered ship about. After a while, the ship gave up chase and fell back as the remaining one surged forward.

"Fire, Canada!" England yelled over the edge, where he knew Canada could hear him. The urgency in his voice didn't seem to help because the explosion occurred too soon for England to be sure of its target. The missile skimmed the side of the remaining ship and disappeared in the distance. The attack hadn't done as much damage as before and England feared that the ship would continue; they had the disadvantage as it would take longer to turn the ship around and speed away. However, the ship seemed to have enough itself for it fell back and stayed bobbing unsteadily as the UKB sailed away.

The crew collapsed in relief and the navigator continued the ship on its escape course as Canada resurfaced, looking utterly bedraggled. England's nerves were frayed and as Canada reached out to see if his captain was alright, the blonde pirate snapped at him. "What's wrong with you? You missed the last one!"

Canada pulled back, looking hurt. "I'm sorry. I got a little jumpy when you called me and…"

"A little?" England shot back, glaring at his dazed co-captain. France appeared instantly at Canada's side, sensing conflict.

"England, calm down. Canada did fine. They're not after us anymore. Don't worry about it." France turned to Canada and snaked an arm around the latter's waist. "You did perfect," he simpered, breathing into Canada's ear.

"Ugh, I need a drink," England muttered as he turned away from the writhing couple. "I can't handle anything else today…"

"Captain!" The navigator rushed up to him breathlessly. "There's another ship coming at us!"

"Good god, another one?" England rubbed the space between his eyes before staring frankly at his navigator. "Whose is it?"

The navigator paused, biting his lip before pouring on quickly. "It's the Allied ship from before, captain," he said rushing his words, as if maybe he could escape from the captain's wrath.

Death seemed to flash in those green eyes. "The Allies ship?"

"Yes, and it's given us the signal to stop and let them board."

"Dammit." England's mind wandered to the cargo beneath deck that they hadn't gotten rid of with China. "Out of all the times they decide to check a ship. We already look suspicious with our battle scars and they're bound to do a full-fledged search." England sighed running his hand through his hair, knocking his lacey hat off his head. "Fine. Fine. We'll be cordial about it until they go beneath deck. Put on your best acts, men."

The navigator tore off to the cockpit. England turned to Canada and France, who had finally separated. "What do we do now?"

Canada looked frantic. France took a deep breath although England could see the anxiety present. "I told you it was a bad idea this morning, but…"

"I don't need another argument," England interrupted. "Tell the underlings to prepare the cannons. I think we'll need them."

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A dog only had to look around before finding a stick…or so a proverb goes. America had set out on a search to find the pirate ship and fortunate of fortunes, they had stumbled on the very ship they had been looking for. America had the flag for boarding raised and the ship seemed compliant as it slowed close to them. Grinning heroically, America beckoned for Lithuania and a few other crew members. "Stay here and stand down unless I give you the signal. Sealand, that means you too."

Sealand pouted but fell back as the pirate ship pulled up along side. The Jolly Roger flapped cheerfully overhead, seeming to overtake the colorful Allies flag. Planks connected the two and America nimbly crossed, followed by Lithuania. Jumping onto the UKB, America casually saluted England, who was glaring at him a grudge of epic proportions between France and Canada. "Hello, Admiral America at your service! It looks like you've been up to something, blondie."

The pirate's eye seemed to twitch. "My name is England, thank you very much. We had a minor run-in. Nothing serious. What do you want?"

"I don't think you're in any position to be rude, England. We've got a search warrant for you and your ship." America waved around an official looking document. "You're wanted by my boss and his friends."

"Oh really?"

"That's right. And I, being both Admiral and hero, am going to take all of you into custody and take you all back." America waved his arms to gesture to the rest of the startled UKB crew. With a surprising smirk, he added, "That okay with you?"

England stared at him before a smirk of equal merit appeared on his face. "Oh, right. Of course. An Allies hero. Tell me, mister hero, what have we been doing wrong? Last time I checked, it was completely legal to sail the high seas. What have I done to offend your boss?" England crossed his arms, considering the argument. "You have no merits to your accusation."

America gaped at him. "I didn't think pirates could use big words."

"Oh, I'm a pirate? Says who?" England turned to France. "What have I done that deserves that title? Have I stolen anything? Can you prove anything? Give me that." Crossing the deck to America in three strides, England snatched the warrant from America's hand. Skimming it over, he stared up challengingly at the admiral. "I sound like quite the fairy tale villain, don't I? 'Pillage and rape'? 'Grand thief'? Do you have solid proof that I, England, am the perpetrator for these crimes?"

America blinked. His boss hadn't gone into much detail and Lithuania even admitted he knew little about the UKB. He glanced back at his knowledge specialist and Lithuania shrugged slightly. "Ahem, no…but I'm sure that if you're as innocent as you sound, we can search your boat without much problem."

There was a shift, a slight change that seemed to turn the emerald eyes looking up at him murky. "Alright, then." England turned around and walked over to France and Canada again, crumpling up the arrest warrant as he did so. With a wave of his hand, England had America and his small army surrounded and there was a series of loud splashes as the planks were knocked away. The UKB gave a great lurch and America nearly fell over. France and Canada had drawn pistols and England had turned around again.

"You can search the boat if you can do so in one piece." With a smirk, England raised his hands and the attack began.

Stupid pirates, thinking they were superior with their wimpy little gunpowder guns. After a few rounds, which seemed to rocket all over the place – the tall, sophisticated man didn't seem to be able to aim for his life and the other seemed to be trying to shoot with a trembling hand – America unsheathed his sword. "England!" he called. "On the record, you attacked first!"

"Fine!" the arrogant voice called from the fray and America found himself in a one on three combat with three of the crew members. The owners of the guns had seemed to give up the still clunky weapons and were engaging in swordfight as well. Lithuania wasn't a trained swordsmen but he was quite adept at close combat and was fast enough to save his own life. The pirates were skilled, but unpolished and America wondered if he really was so awesome that he seemed to be beating them single-handedly.

One of the captains had turned to face them and in the midst of flashing steel, America frowned. "Canada? Is that you?"

Canada faltered, suddenly drawing back. He had the misfortune of backing into England, who had heard the whole exchange. "Canada? You know him?"

"I…I don't…" Almost as fast as he had challenged America, Canada disappeared in the mass of bodies again. France was having a go at Lithuania, and both were preoccupied to help their respected captains.

"How about we fight one-on-one? I don't think you need help from your wimpy little crew members?"

England gave a pained smile. "Bring it on, hot stuff. Although don't think you can whine your way to a victory." Drawing his sword almost too fast for America to see, the two engaged in a tense battle that seemed to draw the eyes of all present. America swore sparks flew as England parried an attempt at his life and pushed back with equal gusto. Falling back into stance, America scanned the deck and noticed that most of the pirates were already fallen and his side, the hero side, was obviously the clear winner.

"Give it up, England. You're finished. You can't fend us off single-handedly." England glanced back at the remaining allies he had, which proved only to be one or two of his crew members, France, and Canada, who was refusing to meet his eyes. There was no time for explanation; he'd hear Canada's sob story later. "France!" he barked. "Status of our goods?"

France looked surprised. "I don't know."

"You mean it's not protected?" England growled as he threw down his sword and sprinted below deck. "Take care of this, France. I don't have time to be dealing with wannabes." Passing the artillery deck, he ordered for immediate fire onto the next ship and the level was filled with movement to arm the cannons.

America followed England with his eyes. "Your captain seems to be rather suspicious for an innocent mariner," he mused.

"Hush, little boy, you don't know England." France held his sword in front of him. "Why don't you fight me like a man?" In touch with the mood, a canon sounded beneath them and America heard Sealand's yelp as his ship was under attack. Sighing, he planned his course of action in his head and turned to Lithuania and his remaining men.

"Take care of them, Lithuania," America ordered. "I'll follow the captain."

"Yes, sir." There was a beat before America darted to the stairs and France lunged at him; France was in turn intercepted by Lithuania and Canada had been stopped by more Allies crew members before he could stop America. The excited blonde took the stairs two at a time, ignoring the men arming the canons and darting to the next deck. At the bottom of the boat, America had reached the foot of the stairs just in time to see England reaching for the door of what seemed to be a storage area. "Well, well, what do we have here?"

Turning around so sharply America would have been surprised that he didn't get whiplash, England backed against the door. "France not enough for you?" he snarled, looking like a cat rubbed the wrong way. America made his way around the bags of sugar and other goods in the storage deck until he was only a few feet away from England.

"Care to share what you have hidden in your little room?"

"Go to hell."

"Is that any way to speak to an admiral?"

England looked ready to spit fire. "What's behind this door is my business and none of yours. If you don't get back to your little ship, we're going to decimate it and hold you hostage. Trust me," he said, venom with every word, "we can make it very painful."

America paused. He had always liked a challenge and he hadn't been expecting England to easily give him right of way. The way the pirate looked like he was going to pounce…it was all very attractive and America didn't even know he swung that way. No matter. "I'm going to have you under arrest," he said slowly, tightening his grip on his sword, "and I'm going to bring your whole crew under custody. The justice system is fair, and if you're not doing anything wrong, then you should have everything straightened out."

"The justice system is anything but fair," England shot back. "If you give me that bullshit, I'm going to have to kill you." He pulled out a shotgun of his own. "Come closer and I'll blow your brains out."

The next moment seemed preordained; the gods of the seas seemed to have played them like puppets. England raised the gun and America had knocked it out his hand with the flat edge of his sword. His hand stinging, England had pulled back and America shot forward, although neither got the assault each was thinking. America's lips collided almost painfully against England's, catching the pirate by surprise. America had planned a surprise attack in which he would distract England while grabbing for the door but his hands seemed to have a mind on its own and preoccupied with exploring the pirate's body instead of exploring the wall for the doorknob.

Maybe it was pent up emotion, stress from the job. Maybe it was just the adrenaline. Perhaps it was even the strange smelling spice that seemed to fog over his brain. Something, just something, had made him change direction, take another course of action. Pressing the smaller man against the door, America breathed a musky scent of tea and biscuits and England's lips were surprisingly soft for the all the barbs that passed it.

All America knew was that it was over almost the moment it started. His mind might have muddled over but England's seem as sharp as a tack and in the next second, America was the one stepping back and England had taken his sword from his hand and was holding it out at him.

"Get…up those stairs…and never return," England gasped, taking in air from the breath-stealing kiss. "Or I swear I will make sure you never see the sun again." There was such force to the order that America felt the need to obey. That, and the canons had been going off for some time and the Hero U.S probably needed to pull back if she wanted to see another day. Turning on his heel, America dashed up the stairs again to the upper deck and spotted Lithuania struggling at the edge. "Get a plank across!" America shouted. "We're retreating."

"Run little children, back to your mothers with your tails in-between your legs," France mocked, but America ignored him as Sealand threw a board across and his crew escaped by the skin of their gums. America was about to clamor across the wobbly plank when there was a gunshot and Sealand cried out; someone had shot at him and the bullet grazed his side. In surprise, the little deckhand dropped the plank, which fell into the ocean below him. Lithuania grabbed the injured boy and escaped below deck. America turned on the shooter with fierce fervor. "What did you do that for? You shot at a child!"

England, who had seemed to recover unnaturally fast, held out the smoking revolver at arm's length. "Then he should know not to mess with pirates and sea battles. He's liable to get hurt."

America sputtered before lunging at the pirate captain. "You could have killed him!"

"Then I would have killed him," England said calmly, catching America as he came at him and with strength that the admiral wouldn't have expected, threw him overboard. "Cross my paths again, little admiral, and you won't live to see another day. Have your cheap sword back." America resurfaced from the icy water in time to see his sword plunge into the sea and he swam over to retrieve it. The UKB pulled away, spraying him with a wave of water and America sputtered, struggling to stay afloat.

"America! Here!" A strong coarse rope floated near him and America took hold of it, his other hand clutching at his sword as his teeth chattered. It had nearly been a fatal experience for him and he wouldn't have liked to relive it for the slightest.

He had failed. He had been ordered to arrest the UKB and now here he was, being pulled back onto his own ship by his crew members while watching the criminals get away. This was not how a hero was supposed to act. He had gotten carried away and experimented at the worst time. It had to stay a secret. No one had to know about what happened below deck.

Being pulled over the side, America collapsed on deck as Lithuania gave orders for the admiral to be carried to his room. Little Canada…all grown up now on a pirate ship. Was this what it all came down to?

And England…snappy England with the green eyes and the soft lips…America closed his eyes, willing and successfully expelling the image from his mind. An admiral was to be true to his boss and his country.

For the life of him, he was going to catch those pirates and he was going to protect the goodness of the world. Because if the Admiral of the High Seas didn't, who would?

To be continued

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Note: I think for all who have been waiting so patiently, I should update this soon afterwards. And there's USUK too! Are you happy? It's going to be the most USUK smut for a while…but stick around, because the plot is thickening. Don't you think so? Comments? Reviews? Click that little button below!