Chapter 4 – Day 25
Seven sat with her back against a rock at the base of the final slope that led to the generator building. The site was likely less than six kilometers from her current location, and in fact, you could see the top half of the cube shaped metallic building over the rise just up the trail. In the past couple of days as they approached, they had gotten a good view of the location. It was hard to miss. Seven and Chakotay speculated that perhaps those who erected the energy barrier wanted the natives to know its source and be drawn to the site as they evolved, perhaps with the intention of being able to bring down the energy barrier themselves when they were ready. The mountain on which the generator building sat appeared as if the top had been cleaved off and the building sat in the center of a roughly circular and featureless plateau.
Chakotay had left that morning for the final trek to the building's location. From the look of it in the distance, it might require some tricky climbing. Seven was too weak to continue, the implants in her legs refusing to function correctly, and her leg muscles just not strong enough to carry her full weight. She had started feeling the effects of not regenerating after only a few days, but now the twenty-five days without regeneration had taken its toll on her Borg implants and they were finally shutting down. Her original estimate of a month hadn't been too far off.
Star had stayed back with her, and Seven could tell Star was growing more and more concerned with her condition. To make matters worse, it was getting colder, with possibly another storm moving in from the west. In anticipation of the cold, Star had gone off to collect more wood for the fire. At some point, if it got too bad, they would have to move and find shelter. The ridge where they were now was just too exposed. It was about thirty-five hundred meters above the Ledosian sea level with the generator building itself perhaps five hundred meters or more higher and above tree line.
Hopefully Chakotay would return soon. It was now midafternoon. It was likely his mission to bring the barrier down had failed, for if he had succeeded, surely he would have contacted Voyager or at least the Ledosians to come and get them by now. Besides, if her cortical node was going to give out, she wanted him here with her. Even if the failsafe and her Borg physiology prevented her from loving him fully, she did have feelings for him. That much had become clear to her in these past few weeks. If she was going to die…
Enough of that. There was no sense in wallowing in self-pity.
Seven looked back up the trail to see if she could see any evidence of Chakotay's return. There were small rodent-like animals eating something at the base of a large conifer tree, possibly the seed cones from the trees that littered the forest floor. She tried to recall in what direction Star had gone and decided it was probably in the opposite direction down the trail where the forest appeared to be thicker. Despite her deteriorating condition, the hike up through the forest had been visually fascinating with a wide variety of plant and animal life.
After crossing the large river twelve days ago, the terrain sloped upward as they approached the foothills of the central mountain range. They reached the foothills after three days of relatively easy travelling, although Seven's worsening condition slowed them down considerably. By that time, the generator building was clearly visible and it seemed possible they would reach it in just a few more days travel. Unfortunately, they soon discovered these mountains were riddled with steep walled canyons, and found they would often have to double back after travelling up a canyon with then no means of going further at the end. Seven's condition compounded the delays. About six days after the river crossing, she required the assistance of either Star or Chakotay to even walk. After a few days of that, only Chakotay was strong and sturdy enough to be able to assist.
Fortunately, three days ago they encountered a hunting party of another band of the natives who were familiar with these mountains. Star talked to them extensively and learned the best route to the top of the particular mountain that contained the generator building. Now, with their goal finally within reach, Seven's health had deteriorated to the point where she was unable to continue.
Seven shivered and pulled the fiber cloak that was draped over her shoulders closer. She noticed the implant on her hand was surrounded by red irritated skin. In fact, as she examined her legs, she realized all her exposed implants appeared the same way. Evidently, as her cortical node lost function, her human immune system was starting to assert itself more fully and reject her implants. The infection had advanced quickly, since there was no sign of it only this morning. She shivered again and recognized it was not just the dropping temperature but also she was probably now running a high fever.
A rustling down the trail alerted Seven to Star's return and she quickly looked up. Star held a bundle of wood and placed some on the fire and the rest into a nearby pile. She looked up the trail at the approaching storm and frowned. She then drew near to Seven and placed the back of her hand on Seven's forehead. She withdrew it quickly and signed an urgent question. Seven didn't understand the signs exactly, but it was clear Star had noticed Seven's fever and was asking her how she felt.
"I'm getting worse. I have a fever," Seven replied, but knew Star wouldn't understand. The girl was very intelligent and had picked up on the meaning of many words and particularly various human expressions and gestures. Seven shook her head, an expression she knew Star had learned from her and Chakotay, and also signed the words 'bad' and 'hot'. During the past few days, Star had taught her various signs, such as 'good' and 'bad', and had been assessing her health more and more frequently. Seven used her hand with the implant to make the gesture, and immediately Star also noted the infection. She reached forward and took Seven's hand and examined it closely.
Star frowned again, but also glared with intensity. It was evident by her expression she had made a decision. In recent days she seemed more serious with a growing air of maturity. Star moved over to where she had put her satchel and opened it. Seven had been curious of what the satchel contained. Star rarely was separated from it and carried it with almost a reverence. She had seen Star extract three things from it before during their journey. A piece of flint for starting a fire, a piece of charcoaled wood that Star used to make marks on trees, and something she gave Chakotay to chew after he had what must have been an allergic reaction to some nuts they had found and ate in the foothills. Now, however, Star laid out all the satchel's contents. Seven saw there were a variety of leaves and roots and other items in pockets on the inside. Star removed what appeared to be a cup made of stone. It must have taken patience and skill to chip out the stone in that way. Into the cup she crumbled up some dry leaves and then used another stone that fit inside the first to pulverize them even more. She moved off to where they stored their other items and poured into the stone cup some water from a container Chakotay had made of leaves and thread. With a stick from the satchel, she held the cup near the fire for several minutes, evidently to warm it. Finally, she took some green leaves from a nearby plant to handle the heated cup safely and handed the cup to Seven.
Seven couldn't explain to Star that there was no cure for her particular ailment, but accepted the cup and took a sip. It was only lukewarm and tasted bitter. Star shook her head vigorously and made more signs. It was clear she wanted Seven to drink the entire contents. Seven obliged and drained the rest of the liquid in a single gulp. It left a metallic aftertaste in her mouth.
Star went back to her satchel and now placed some small roots into the stone cup and began mashing them with the other stone. After a time she added a little water and continued until the cup was filled with a paste. The paste appeared to be the same color and consistency as what the leader applied to Chakotay's wound when they first arrived. Star came over to Seven and applied the paste onto the Borg implants on her hand and above her eye. When she used up the current supply, she returned to her satchel and put more root into the cup and repeated the process.
Eventually, Star used her entire supply of the root paste and covered all of the Borg implants in this way. Those on Seven's arms and legs seemed particularly tender, and Star did her best to not aggravate the pain. Seven's fever worsened, and so Star brewed a second batch of the dried leaves tea and made Seven drink every drop.
It became darker as clouds moved in and covered the summit where the generator building was. A storm was imminent and Seven could see flashes of distant lightning in the direction up the trail but still too distant to hear the associated thunder.
"Where is Chakotay?" Seven wondered aloud.
Star made a sign with her fingers near her head and then touched her temple. It was her gesture for Chakotay. She made other signs and looked back up the trail. Seven found, to a certain degree, she could understand what Star was saying.
"I'm worried too," Seven replied. "I… wish he would return soon."
Seven hadn't spoken to Chakotay about the failsafe. And yet, now that her death was near, she wanted to tell him. She wanted to explain to him why she had rebuffed his advances on Voyager. She should have never let him go this morning. In all likelihood, her condition had now deteriorated beyond repair. Even if she were to try and regenerate, it was probably too late. Her body was rejecting the Borg implants now that her cortical node was shutting down and unable to regulate them properly. He may not have listened to her. He seemed desperate and determined to do something to save her. How could she tell him it might already be too late? She couldn't be saved. In these last hours, however, she would have rather had him close.
"Perhaps you should go and look for Chakotay," Seven suggested and also made a few signs to that effect and pointed back up the trail. "He could be hurt."
Star shook her head and signed something that Seven interpreted as 'he can take care of himself – I must attend to you.'
But what if something terrible had happened to Chakotay? Seven closed her eyes. Star was examining her hand again and was trying to tell her something, but she was suddenly very sleepy and just couldn't keep her eyes open to see.
It was just a minute later, or an hour, but the next thing Seven knew she was inside a Jeffries tube. It was cramped. There was a problem she was working on and she was using her assortment of tools to complete the task. As she thought more about the problem, however, it became less and less clear what she was supposed to do. Was it realigning the inducer or a calibration of the energy buffer? Her thoughts were all muddled. In fact, as she looked more closely, this wasn't a Jeffries tube at all, but the mouth of a cave and both Star and Chakotay were now there with her. She had no memory of how they got there, and what was this panel doing here anyway? The other two were talking to one another.
"It is the most powerful I have," Star said.
"Is it safe?" Chakotay asked.
"What more is there to do?" Star replied.
Although she heard them speak, they weren't talking with their mouths. They were gesturing to each other and using the sign language of the natives.
"Do what you can," Chakotay said. He spoke aloud this time. His voice sounded anxious and tired. She wanted to call to him, to have him come to her side, but she couldn't. There was the problem she had to solve. Behind the panel. If she could just solve that problem, but the tools in her hand were now unfamiliar to her.
She was now laying on her back. She was both hot and cold. Shadows danced in patterns on the ceiling. Someone was leaning over her. It was difficult to make out their faces. Her hand felt smaller than it should. This was a memory of when she was a child and she was ill. Her mother and father were there with her. Her mother touched her forehead and her father looked concerned.
"Seven," her father said lovingly. He was holding her hand in his and stroked her hair with the other. But that was not right. She was Annika, not Seven.
Her mother made her drink something out of a cup. It was thick and tasted both hot and cold. Just like how she felt. She could feel it in her mouth and going down her throat.
"It is done," her mother said, but not with words.
There was a thunderclap. It was darker now and outside she could hear the rain and wind howl. But… there was that problem she needed to attend to.
She was back in the Jeffries tube, but the wiring to the gel-pack in front of her was of an unknown configuration. If only she could solve this problem, everything would be okay. What was it that she's expected to do?
In the background, some music was playing. Perhaps it had been playing all along. Someone on the piano playing Chopin's Nocturne No. 19 in E minor. It was a piece she particularly liked and could play herself.
The scene shifted. The melody was twisted and distorted, and in time she became aware of a metronome that ticked away on a piano. The piano was there in front of her. She was in her holoprogram where she practiced aboard Voyager. But it wasn't the metronome from her holoprogram, but rather one that appeared should belong within a Borg cube. A sickly green light pulsed from within the device.
She had had this particular dream before, when her failsafe was activated a few months ago. Now she was having fever induced hallucinations. A fever dream. Had she been dreaming all this time?
She turned away and in front of her stood a full length mirror, and she knew what she would see if she stepped forward. She didn't want to see, but she had no control. Her legs moved of their own accord and she stepped up to the mirror. Staring back at her was a Borg drone. Herself just three short years ago. Herself now, for the technology was still inside her. It was a part of her. She was a Borg drone.
"I'm right here Seven," someone behind her said. "Just hold on."
She turned and sitting on the piano bench facing her was Chakotay. He was dressed as he had been in her simulations. He looked strong and confident and sympathetic and caring all at the same time. He was everything she wanted and needed. She needed to tell him about the failsafe, but it was almost too late.
"It's alright Seven," he said. "You're going to be fine."
"No I'm not," Seven replied. "Don't you see? This is what I am. I can't love you. I'm not allowed to love you."
He looked back at her as if he didn't see who she was. As if he didn't see the hideous Borg armor and exterior. And he didn't understand, for he repeated "you're going to be fine. I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here with you."
"I can't love you!" Seven shouted. "The Borg damaged me and made sure of that."
The metronome beat beside him incessantly, but he could somehow ignore it. She stepped forward in frustration and picked up the metronome, throwing it towards the mirror and shattering it. "I can't," she sobbed. "I can't…"
The scene shifted again. Chakotay was now holding her, his arms held tight and her face buried in his chest. The light flickered, but she didn't want to move. There was a dull ache within her body that seemed to be spreading to encompass her. She could feel it as it moved down her arms and legs and into her fingers and toes. Was this what it was like to die? At least she was in his arms, even if it was only a dream.
"I can't," she whispered, suddenly feeling weak and exhausted. She now became aware of his warmth next to her, surrounding her, and drew strength from it. "Love you," she finished weakly, and succumbed to the nothingness.
#
Author's note: Thanks to all those reading and reviewing. Chopin's Nocturne No. 19 in E minor is what Seven plays in "Human Error". It's beautiful and haunting.