"Well that was not bad for my first foray into cashew cheese." Cosima teased as she sipped her sparkling water in an attempt to cleanse her palate.
Delphine immediately felt guilty.
"If you didn't want vegan we could have gone somewhere else" She stated before planting her bottom lip firmly between her teeth, while the rest of her face formed into an uneasy smile.
"No, I wanted to try it. I just hope you don't hate me for being a carnivore."
"Non, don't be silly. I wasn't vegan until Olivier insisted we eat 'clean'… It's honestly funny considering some of his habits" The blonde scoffed before realizing she may have said too much.
"Oh…I see" Cosima replied nervously and subsequently excused herself to the restroom.
Relieved to have the time to process what was happening without interruption, Delphine's mind began to race. She knew Olivier's issues should remain private, especially considering his career. Despite that fact, she began to realize while having lunch with Cosima that her relationship had become far more complicated than it was worth. During their conversation she realized she was probably staying with him due to familiarity and a sense of obligation to the broken and destitute man he had become.
In addition to her confusion about Olivier, Delphine began to dissect her budding friendship with Cosima. Although she never really considered women to be attractive outside of the occasional admiration of the female form, there was certainly something about Cosima that drew her to question herself. Cosima was talented, intelligent and charming and she had her life in order so to speak. Cosima was also sweet and attentive and seemed to only want to make sure Delphine was comfortable and smiling. Throughout their meal Cosima had inquired about her career, hobbies and even her future plans. She found herself wondering if Olivier had ever asked her about these things during their year long relationship. His self-centered monopoly over every conversation was constant but she'd assumed it was part of being with someone slightly famous. Oddly enough, here she was with Cosima, who was more well-known than her boyfriend and much less egocentric if at all.
As all of these thoughts raced through her mind Cosima was returning. Delphine knew she needed to try to change the topic in order to avoid raising the brunette's suspicions about Olivier's 'habits'.
"Cosima can I ask you a question?" The blonde all but blurted without a clear idea what she intended to ask.
"Yes, and you don't have to ask that before asking either" Cosima teased with a smile that showed the tip of her tongue between her teeth with one eyebrow cocked in playful curiosity.
It was a look Delphine had grown quite fond of and was further flustered by it briefly before asking her question.
"Did you ask me here as your friend or… as a date?"
That was certainly not the question Cosima expected and based on the nervous look on Delphine's face she didn't know she was going to ask it. Cosima even entertained the idea of telling the truth but lost her nerve just before she began.
"Well I uh like you Delphine…I mean I think you're great but you have a boyfriend and I assumed you were straight so I wouldn't want to set myself up for disappointment you know?"
"Oui je comprends. I'm sorry I asked. It's just with the flowers…" There was hint of disappointment in Delphine's reply.
"Delphine I can see how that could throw you off and I honestly almost didn't get them but they reminded me of you and how vibrant of a person you are. I couldn't help but think every woman deserves flowers and be reminded that their beautiful once in a while. Even if it's by their new buddy"
'Amazing recovery Niehaus' She thought to herself as she watched Delphine's smile grow and her eyes begin to gloss as if she were going to cry.
"Wow Cosima, qui est très doux . Tu me flattes"
"I'm hoping you are happy despite the look on your face? Please don't be upset"
"Non, I said you are sweet. It has been so long since anyone has cared about my interests the way you seem to and with your constant attention a girl could become spoiled." She laughed the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes away.
"Glad to do it. You deserve it… You are truly something special" Cosima paused for a moment reveling in the change in Delphine's demeanor. She felt a sense of accomplishment due to the woman's appreciation for her efforts. She couldn't help but think of how often she felt unappreciated by Kathryn. The women were polar opposites and the fact that Delphine was not vain enough to care if she showed emotion endeared her more to Cosima.
"Now if you're ready Ms. Cormier I would love to get out of this restaurant and get some sun…It's a gorgeous day."
"Oui, it is. After you"
The women walked outside and breathed in the warm air as they shielded their eyes from the sun. Once Delphine began to walk, Cosima followed behind slightly admiring the elegance with which she carried herself. When describing her new friend to her brother she'd mentioned old Hollywood. She was beginning to notice a hint of Grace Kelly and she couldn't help but picture herself as the Prince of Monaco.
As they walked somewhat aimlessly, Delphine would bring her flowers to her nose and smile before glancing back at Cosima. She was definitely glad she'd ignored Felix and gotten the flowers. She really loved to see the blonde so happy.
"I don't mean to interrupt our stroll but do we have a destination in mind?"
"Non, can we just walk for a while?"
"Of course, anything you want" The brunette replied sincerely with a grin.
Delphine felt herself melt at the words and playfully bumped shoulders with Cosima as they walked toward where she had parked her car.
After the thirty minute walk full of dog petting, window shopping and stolen glances between the two, they arrived at Delphine's car. She drove a new Prius that Olivier convinced her would save her tons on gas, when in reality he drove it more than she did.
"So we walked to your car I see…You know mine was much closer right?"
The brunette chuckled with her hands on her hips playfully like a school teacher.
"Oui, but it is such a nice day like you said and I didn't want to leave you just yet…"
"Oh yeah, I get that. It's not that I didn't enjoy it, I just think it's kinda funny…It seems to me that overall you really like spending time with me."
There was a brief pause as Cosima awaited Delphine's response somewhat leaning forward into the blondes personal space.
"Oh Cosima, what am I going to do with you? Wait… don't answer that I know how that mind works."
"Oh no darlin', you have no idea" Cosima replied with no hesitance.
"Hmmm maybe not but I can guess that it is quite dirty when the opportunity presents itself, non?
Delphine realized she was taking the flirting into dangerous territory and she wasn't sure why. While she was having fun with Cosima, she had a boyfriend and even if she was single she wasn't sure this type of banter was appropriate to be participating in with a woman. Flirtation was one thing but sexual innuendo was something else entirely.
"Yes Delphine, when it presents itself." Cosima breathed, all but dismissing the suggestion so she wouldn't go too far and scare the other woman.
Although Cosima refused to show her frustration verbally, her body certainly did. She felt herself begin to flush and her brow became a bit damp. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had such a visceral reaction to a woman's flirtation. Her first response was to run and get away from Delphine before the woman had too much influence over her emotions, but she couldn't help but be drawn to her smile and the smell of her shampoo as the breeze blew it directly toward her. There was an overwhelming sense of dread trying to overtake the excitement over the feelings the woman gave her. She knew what happened when gay girls fell for straight ones. The tales of heartache were enough to keep Cosima from seriously pursuing one, until now. She had only wished she could reach out and touch Delphine again and see if these feelings were mutual. Their brief moment at the table really threw Cosima for a loop and gave her the slightest hope that Delphine felt it too. The connection was too strong to be one sided. 'Wasn't it?' She thought with no hope of finding the answer on her own. She needed to know. If only she could find a way to spend more time with Delphine.
They stood outside of the car briefly as Delphine leaned against the car and smoked a cigarette not wanting Olivier to smell it in the car as she wasn't allowed to smoke either.
"Well Cosima did you want a ride back to your car? I'd offer you a cigarette but I don't want to corrupt you." Delphine said with a wink clearly deciding to keep up this teasing.
"Corrupt me? I'm the Dennis Rodman of women's soccer if you let anyone else tell it" Cosima joked knowing that she was far from that salacious.
"Je sais ce qu'ils dissent Cosima, but I see someone who is misunderstood. Like I said, you have layers… One's I intend to peel off over time."
"First the French, now the talk of peeling layers off of me? Are you trying to give me a heart attack or…?"
"Non, I'm sure your heart will sustain itself, you're in great shape." Delphine retorted deciding to throw caution to the wind. She loved getting this reaction from Cosima. Especially when considering the woman's knack for teasing her mercilessly.
For Cosima this was moving quickly into confusing territory. Delphine couldn't possibly be trying to seduce her but intentionally or not she felt herself becoming enticed. Determined not to fall into any traps or overstep into the predatory stereotype she backed down.
"Why don't you give me that ride just in case? We don't want to risk it."
Finished smoking, Delphine laughed and got into the car. Cosima followed as she took notice of the immaculate condition of the vehicle. She was suddenly relieved they hadn't gone to her car first because she was sure Delphine would've been appalled at the water bottles and random gear strewn around her backseat.
Just as she thanked the universe the traffic was extending their time together, Cosima got a brilliant idea.
"Hey, so I know we've spent a lot of time together today but there's a party at the Abbey tonight for one of my teammates' birthdays and I remember you saying you don't get out much…Anyway if you're free I'd like for you to come. Full disclosure it is a gay bar but straight people go all the time…"
Delphine found Cosima's nervous rambling endearing but felt like giving the woman break so she interrupted.
"…Yes Cosima I've been. My friend Thomas knows several of the dancers there quite intimately. I have some work to do but maybe I can go when I'm finished. Can I call you when I decide?"
"Yeah, of course! It's going to be fun, so I hope you can make it."
They drove back toward the brunettes' car in a comfortable silence when a familiar song came on the radio and Delphine began to sing along.
"Non, rien de rien, non, je ne regrette rien
Ni le bien qu`on m`a fait, ni le mal…"
"Hey I've heard this one…it's the one about having no regrets." Cosima says as if she's thinking out loud.
Delphine nearly gasps in shock. It was a very popular song but not with most Americans and she would've never pictured Cosima listening to it, let alone knowing what it was about.
"Oui, it is a very popular song."
"Yes, but aren't surprised I know it?" Cosima asked hopefully as she noticed Delphine become a bit flustered.
"Very…"
"Well I'll be honest, I did some research after we last spoke and I grew to like many of the songs I heard. Your recommendation was appreciated."
The American was proud to have caught the woman off guard and was pleased with her reaction.
While Delphine drove, she felt herself gripping the steering wheel tightly to prevent her hands from reaching over to touch Cosima. She wasn't sure what had come over her but the fact that the woman spent her free time researching something Delphine was interested in in order to connect with her, affected her in a way that she couldn't comprehend. It was as if her mind was fighting with her body for control. While her mind was telling her Cosima was just a good friend and a great listener, her body was telling her to climb over the seat and kiss the woman within an inch of her life. This was not at all how she intended this day to go but after her night with Olivier she was convinced this was just a result of her life feeling out of control and she was letting her emotions get the better of her. They finally arrived at the parking lot and Delphine waited with Cosima for the valet to bring her car around.
"Well I had a great time with you today Cosima, you have a pleasant ease about yourself. You must have a ton of friends"
"So did I and you're not so bad yourself… But while I know a lot of people, I wouldn't consider most of them friends." Cosima laughed with a half-smile trying to hide the sadness in her voice.
"Well you have me now mon ami, and I won't go so easily."
"Good glad to hear it. Don't forget to call me later, you won't want to miss the party."
Just then the valet rounded the corner in Cosima's Jeep Wrangler. It was a convertible and Delphine immediately pictured Cosima riding in with the top off down Melrose. It seemed to fit her so perfectly and Delphine wondered why she'd ever pictured the woman driving a luxury car to begin with. Cosima was a California girl through and through and the Jeep took her aesthetic to the maximum level.
After coming out of her daydream Delphine realized the car arriving meant it was time to say goodbye. She had been both dreading and anticipating this moment since they'd left the restaurant. She hated the idea of parting from the woman she was quickly developing an attachment to, but she was eager to embrace her under the guise of saying goodbye. She felt fervent in her desire to feel the transfer of energy from Cosima's body to her own because her other senses were already being assaulted by the other woman. The smell of Cosima's cologne had been intoxicating her since they'd entered the car and the sound of her voice was making her shiver. Every time she looked at the woman she noticed something new and unique…a scar, a sinew, a tan line. The only sense left was touch and she craved the skin that made her feel a jolt of adrenaline whenever they even grazed one another. She put taste as far from her mind as she could in an effort to stay sane, fearing that tasting any part of Cosima would send her into a state of complete recklessness.
"Well I don't want to keep you…I mean I do but you have work to do and if I'm honest so do I" Cosima rambled as she tried to make eye contact with a distracted Delphine.
"Oui, so much work and there is traffic…" Delphine knew she needed to go but was insistent on a proper goodbye.
"Yes…traffic." After the awkward pause Cosima reached forward to put her arm around Delphine in what could be described as a 'church hug' complete with a pat on the back.
"Donnez-moi un véritable câlin" Delphine teased unsatisfied, before reaching both arms around Cosima's back and pulling her into a tight embrace.
Cosima was caught off guard by the tight grip around her lower back and felt her temperature begin to rise. She blinked slowly before wrapping her arms around the back of Delphine's shoulders. The blonde rested her head on her shoulder and Cosima could feel the woman's hair tickling her earlobe. It felt as if their hearts were trying to compete to see which would break free from the ribcage first. Never to her recollection had a hug made her feel so stirred, but she knew she didn't want it to end.
Eventually the panic came when her breathing began to pick up and she felt like she was rapidly losing the air in her lungs. Once she realized how tight their embrace had become and how Delphine's body began to shake slightly, she knew she needed to break free. She could not be feeling this way so quickly and didn't want to cross any boundaries. Cosima released her grip quickly as if she was awakening from a dream.
"Désolé… I guess I just got a bit comfortable. It's not often that I get a hug just for the sake of an exchange of affection. It generally is meant to lead to something." Delphine admitted in an effort alleviate what she assumed to be Cosima's discomfort.
"Oh no it's okay I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable you know?"
"J'ai l'obtenir. Vous êtes très chevaleresque, Cosima. I am always comfortable with you…But we had better get going it's nearly 5PM." Delphine stated sadly as she looked toward the ground.
"Yeah of course…Take care Delphine. You can call me later even if you can't make it…you know if you get bored." Cosima offered trying not to sound too eager.
"OK… Merci. Au revoir"
After their goodbyes they proceeded to walk to their respective vehicles without looking back, clearly both moved by the experience they had just shared.