Christmas at the Weasley's
Shortymcshortnphat
Chapter 4. One Scary Mess
Remus and Hermione met early the next morning before anyone else got up. In case anyone came down, their excuse would be that Remus was helping Hermione with her Arithmacy homework.
"So, I have an idea." Hermione said, "Possibly the best one so far."
"So tell me, already." Remus said.
"Ketchup." Hermione replied with a gleeful smile on her face. Remus looked at her in confusion.
"That took a turn..." He said, "Care to explain?"
"Packets of ketchup, that's where the prank is, packets of ketchup." Hermione said. Taking a cue from Remus's confused expression she began to explain, "Say you roll up two ketchup packets so, you know, the ketchup is at one end and poke holes in with like a needle or something."
"So, we have leaking ketchup packets; how diabolical." Remus commented.
"Wait till I finish, please." Hermione said, "Put these packets between the toilet bowl and the toilet seat; someone sits down and splat; a massive freak out."
"Ah, now I see where you're going." Remus said with a smile, "But who do we do it to?"
"We need to do it to a man; a woman would just think it was course of nature."
"I'm thinking Bill." Remus said, "You don't hear much, you know...I'm not sure I can finish this thought..."
"That's alright; I think I know where you were trying to go." Hermione nodded understandingly.
"Please stop fighting!" Remus said loudly, "Just line up." Hermione and he had kept the drinks going around and the bathroom constantly occupied. Remus stuck Bill first in line and pushed him in when the bathroom became accessible. A few moments later Bill emerged with a look of horror on his face. Charlie tried to enter the bathroom, but Bill stopped him.
"You can't go into the bathroom!" Bill said panicked.
"You have got to be kidding me." Charlie said glaring at his brother.
"Mom!" Bill called loudly.
"Dude...what the hell!" Fred objected loudly, "What is so freakin' important."
"What is it, Bill?" Molly Weasley inquired going up the stairs.
"I, um, I need you to look at something." Bill said
"Why?" Molly asked entering the bathroom and looking around.
"I think I injured my rectum…" Bill said.
Molly looked at him skeptically, "There are ketchup packets on the floor."
"What?" Bill asked confusedly.
"I really thought you were above this kind of prank." Molly replied, "Now let someone else go."
"You mean I didn't injure myself?"
"Drop it, Bill."
"That was kind of funny." Hermione said that night.
"I enjoyed hearing the twins whisper jokes about how he sat down to go to the bathroom." Remus said
"That was hilarious." Hermione said, "So what's next?"
"I have a plan!"
AN: Oh, ugly and short. See, the problem with me doing this kind of story is that I quickly run out of all original ideas very fast. But I have the rest of the story planned out and I'll try to keep to a somewhat regular schedual.