Alfred stood in the middle of the field, admiring the skies and buildings surrounding the empty land. In actual fact, this wasn't a genuine football field, it was just an empty land without an owner. Some said it was rumoured to be jinxed with the haunted spirits of the hospital, some just didn't want to ruin the fun of children who enjoyed playing there.
Even after that first awkward day at Francis', they still had bakery appointments, and Alfred soon became friends with Francis, even though they knew the backgrounds of each other by heart. The appointments weren't long but were memorable, and it was as if Arthur was knowing Alfred all over again. Even after Arthur called Alfred a child, Arthur personally felt that Alfred has matured up, unlike the whiny him from before he vanished.
His eyes were locked onto the clouds, the sky slightly dyed with an antiqued shade of tangerine. His mind wandering off to the night in the hotel room with Matthew and Francis.
"Long time no see, my brother." His voice was polite, his smile wasn't plastic - he meant it. His wavy hair, just like Alfred's biological mother's, well groomed charisma only the Williams could afford. He truly was, the 'better' version of this downtown street boy.
"Williams. What do you want?" He barked, balling his fists and his eyes grew from amused to stern. He never wanted to see this man. Never. He never thought that his brother would actually work as an agent; he never thought he would see his brother at all after what he has done.
"Easy, now. Agent, I'm sure your past with Agent Williams isn't as smooth. But now you're colleagues, so please don't be so hard on him." Francis cooed from behind, walking over to pat Alfred on the shoulder.
"I would rather work for the FBI than work with this imbecile." His words were tense and firm, no sign of mercy, only anger.
"Look, Brother, I wasn't the one who exposed you as a homosexual!" He cried, trying to reason with Alfred. Alfred had every right to be mad at him, he had every right to feel betrayed.
"Oh yeah? You were the only one there. I told you because I trusted you." He spat, his jaw feeling the urge to burst out and punch him.
It was at that night back five years ago, Arthur told Alfred that he was going to study law in Harvard like his father planned. Even if Alfred was younger, he was academically capable of skipping two grades, hence him being in the same class as Arthur all these years. He couldn't afford the fees in Harvard, even a silly scholarship wouldn't help in the long run. That was why... Just to be able to see Arthur at the same level... He requested a loan... From his brother, Matthew Williams.
He called him down to New York to discuss about the loan in the run-down budget motel; away from Amelia, away from Arthur. While discussing, he revealed that the true reason he needed this loan so much was because he wanted to see Arthur and be in the same election courses with him, to be in every moment of Arthur's life. That was the first time he exposed his sexuality, and the only time he ever will. Because the next morning, CIA agents came knocking the front door of Alfred and Amelia's townhouse, and he was told that if he didn't work 'for the country', he would be arrested for some silly reason. Plus, he would have a really high pay if he devoted his life to the intelligence.
"It wasn't me, Alfred. Father, he... He suspected me seeing you when I mentioned coming to the States. I've never left Canada before, and suddenly leaving for a quick trip aroused his suspicion." He explain, as he felt a tinge of happiness glow in him when he saw Alfred's eyes soften. "He put an eavesdropping device in my pouch and I didn't notice it. I'm really sorry, Alfred, it was my fault for being careless and not checking my pouch."
"You... You didn't mean to harm me? I thought..." He trailed off, feeling guilty for accusing Matthew for ruining his life all this while.
"No, I would never do that to you! You're my brother, remember? Brothers help each other. And this is to repay you, too."
"Repay me? For what?" He quizzed, trying to think of what Matthew could've done that needed repaying.
"Well, because of me, you had to live all on your own in New York - "
Alfred cut him off when he said 'all on your own', "No, Matthew. I had my nanny, Amelia. And I had Arthur. That's family for me."
Matthew couldn't help but feel his emotions burst at the look of Alfred smiling and saying that he found his family. He felt relieved, ashamed, foolish, guilty all at once. He couldn't help but feel so weak and vulnerable. Here Alfred was, growing up in a horrible learning environment, being caught and dragged away because of who he loved, yet he could stay so optimistic. What was this strong force that kept him happy all this while? Was it Arthur?
A sudden impulse in Matthew made him march up to Alfred and gave him a tight bear hug, like he always wanted to. Ever since young, he was told having a rebellious brother in New York who changed his surname just because he felt that he wasn't even related to the Williams anymore. He was told about this notorious older brother he had, who would rather live as a rag boy than accept money from the Williams. He had always wanted to hug that brother everyone hated. He had always wanted to show affection to that brother everyone hated. "I'm sorry... I shouldn't have existed..."
Alfred felt his sleeve dampen, just like what he felt when Arthur cried on it. It was the same; silent but powerful. "No, Matthew. It was because of you that I had the chance to befriend Arthur. If it wasn't for you, I would never even know of this hidden gem in New York. I don't know about how it's like living in Canada, but I'm pretty darn happy living here."
"I'm so happy for you two, but you weren't summoned here for a family reunion, Agent." Francis interrupted, taking a photograph out of his suit pocket and flinging it onto the coffee table. "This woman - Natalia Arlovskaya. She's coming for you."
Alfred picked the blurred black and white photograph of her, inspecting it. She obviously wasn't paying attention in this picture, and it was most likely zoomed. Her platinum blonde hair and an icy glare, her little bow she has on her head, a dark coloured coat she had on, surely not any ordinary woman. "Only one assassin? I can shake her off my tail."
"She's not just 'one assassin', she's the elite agent of the KGB. Her ability is probably the power of 10 regular CIA agents combined. Of course, we know you're different. But she's not just some Tom, Dick or Harry. She's dangerous." Matthew warned, taking a folder out from his jacket pocket and spreading the contents on the table. "We don't have much information about her, but we know one thing: she's somehow related to the Ant."
"Braginski? How?" He asked picking a random document and scanning it.
"She's his long lost foster sister. This is one of the most important information we have on her. The rest are unclear, our leads on her location and technique is dangerously vague. We know nothing of her. And now, she's after you." Matthew resumed, looking for a specific document among the the sprawled papers before handing it to Alfred. "Here, the report on the 'Phantom'. She had stolen hundreds of documents, but this is the only one that we actually caught footage of her."
Alfred eyed the document, squinting to make out the blurred out figure in the photograph attached to it. The report said that it was an early morning incident, and she has already sprinkled sedation chemicals in the staff's food the previous night. It was till that extent she was willing to perform to achieve her goal. Alfred was only slightly above average, and only had a few years of experience. Handling a professional was going to be tough. "I can't handle her, are there any direct orders from above?"
"All the board wants is for you to leave as fast as possible. And they want you to be traceless. So, the only place for you to hide is the most dangerous place an American could be." Francis said, slumping down on the couch. "The Soviet Union."
"Wow, either they have a lot of insane ideas or they really want to get rid of me." He teased, then turning serious. "When do I leave?"
"Next week, if you're able to pluck yourself out of New York without Arlovskaya finding you." Matthew said, keeping the documents back into the file. "And if you manage to convince Arthur that you're going to an art conference or something like that."
"Lying to Arthur? That's gonna be tough. I almost blew my cover of it wasn't for Francis." Alfred sighed, slumping down next to Francis. "I really can't stay longer?"
"The longer you stay, the higher chance you get killed." Matthew halted his movement to see the desperation in Alfred's eyes. "Well... If you really need to... Francis and I could help give false information until you have enough time to evaporate yourself from America."
"Really? You really could slow her down?" He asked, immediately getting into an upright position and leaning forward like a grateful puppy. "For how long can you do it for?"
"Don't get your hopes high, but my limit is one month for a top agent like her." Matthew said, still trying to fit all the documents into the file. "If that's okay for you?"
"Oh, that's more than enough! I owe you two, Francis and Matthew!" He cheered, getting up to shake both their hands.
"I will continue working in the bakery and passing you notes. And Matthew will be working as a store worker of a bookshop you normally go to. He will call you about promotions, and let's just hope you get the code, okay?" Francis smiled, getting up as well.
"Thank you again, y'all. But... I don't think I'll be able to tell him now, because he'll keep on pestering me about my reasons. I'll leave it till the last minute before I go. So don't blow my cover, okay Francis?"
"Oh, you procrastinator." He teased, slapping Alfred's back as they had some great wine and a great laugh.
The same black Mercedes rolled in, with Alfred hearing the screeching and turning around, slowly and expectantly. Arthur got off the car to meet Alfred who was wearing a bomber jacket and bitter smile. A sparse sight of Alfred, really. Or was it Arthur that missed out on his mental formation phase?
"You're late, Mr Kirkland." He said, unmoving. He shoved his hands in his pockets and watched Arthur stomping over with a scowl.
"I'm not late! A gentleman is never late! You're just plain early." He grumbled, halting and folding his arms and he was finally in front of Alfred. "And why did you call at the last minute?"
"I didn't call at the last minute, it was just you who didn't pick up the phone." He shrugged, sitting down in the grass. "Since when did we stop coming here?"
Arthur followed in suit, but not a single word escaped his lips. Of course Alfred knew the reason. After Arthur's mother passed away, he didn't want to be reminded of the hospital. After Arthur's mother passed away, he didn't want to ever go near the hospital. So, why? Why did Alfred need to ask?
"Why didn't you let them out that day?" Alfred asked again, only looking at the sky. "Your tears; why didn't you let them out?"
"I... I didn't feel the need to." He lied, shrugging. Alfred had no idea how much he wept when he was alone in that dark, dark house. Alfred had no idea how hurt he felt when none of the other family members shed a single tear for her.
"So, you're saying that you don't feel the need to show your true self?" He inquired, finally making eye contact with Arthur.
"Everybody needs a mask that they will never take off. And I was wearing that mask when she went." He said, trying to intimidate Alfred. But all Alfred could hear was a feeble excuse, all he could hear was the inner self of Arthur whimper in pain.
"Then, why didn't you wear that mask when I visited you the first time I found out about your father's ways?"
"I haven't acquired the skills to find it yet." His retaliation was short, but enough to doge the bullet in such a quick notice. After all, this was what his job was all about - being agile and swift.
"How did you acquire this mask in the end?" He asked, scooting forward on the prickly grass.
"... It was a gift." He replied under his breath. "It was a gift from my father."
"No, you shouldn't have anything given from him on you." Alfred protested, placing a warm hand on his pale face. "Take it off, and never wear it again."
He didn't comment on Alfred's affectionate gesture, but only continued the conversation. "Life's a masquerade; the mask I wear is what I'll wear until it ends."
"Then..." He trailed off, leaning in close to Arthur's ear. "The masquerade is over."
As if on cue, music started echoing from behind. "Make me rainbows... Make me spring in the snow..."
"Oh, I love this song!" Alfred chimed, grabbing Arthur's hand and pulling him up.
"You bloody git, what are you up to now?" He yelled, as Alfred yanked him into an embrace and started rocking from side to side.
"Don't speak, just dance." He cooed, staring into those orbs so lovingly... So very lovingly...
"Let me unwind, leave behind... Rhyme and reason..." The sweet voice of Nancy Wilson was faintly ringing in the distance.
"How the heck is there music in the first place?" He questioned, looking around for the source of the music.
"The hospital's celebrating some sort of anniversary or something, it's nice to see the patients so happy." He smiled, supporting his jaw on Arthur's head, allowing Arthur to fit perfectly in the nook of his neck like a puzzle piece. Being so close to Alfred, the tip of his nose brushing against Alfred's neck, teasing and grazing the skin.
Only the faint recorded voice of Nancy Wilson filtered between them, until Alfred spoke again. "I'm leaving in 24 hours."
Arthur's eyes went as wide as saucers and he pulled himself away to have a clearer view of Alfred. The sun had set ages ago, making it hard to make Alfred's face out. But somehow it was illuminated by the pale moonlight, the bitter smile growing more and more sorrowful. "Please... Don't be joking..."
"Sadly, I can't stay around to joke anymore..." He sighed, trying to maintain the forced smile on his face. "I have to go..."
"You... You're wearing a mask yourself..." He muttered, burying his face into Alfred's jacket, breath shaking. "I knew something was up. You weren't an artist, were you?"
"I guess I couldn't lie to old Artie..." He sighed bitterly, closing his eyes and savouring the sensation of Arthur in his arms.
"Then... Where were you? All this while, where were you? Where was the hero I knew when I needed him most?" His voice was cracking, his tone elevating and he fought a sob back. He couldn't take his mind of the one time he was bullied... Bullied until he was raped... It was that one night in university when a pack of them came and invaded his nether territories... Scarring the most sacred part of him... But when he called for Alfred's rescue, he only realised that Alfred had already vanished.
"I don't know what happened this past five years. I won't know what'll happen in the next fifty years. But all I know that is now, that I'm embracing the one I love. And I'll hold him until the night ends, and I'll return when the masquerade is over."
"The one you love..?"
"You, are the one I love. For so long I've stayed strong, is to be able to see you again. And now, I'll make sure I make it through this Cold War just to take off this mask for both you and I."
"Life's really a masquerade..."
"And I shall dance you through this night, my dear."
If only Alfred could come back, there was no way of contacting him. No one will ever know whether he's alive or dead after he enters the Communist world. It would take a miracle for Alfred to appear right in his face one day, with the same old goofy grin. Even if Arthur didn't know exactly what Alfred's real job was about, even if Arthur didn't know where he has actually been these five years, even if Arthur didn't know where he was going or any way to navigate him, he knew it was best for him to stay silent and savour the moment.
Alfred didn't exactly hear Arthur accept his love, but he already felt like it was a miracle for him to finally let him acknowledge the truth.
"Make me some rainbows... Star Spangled rainbows... Make me some rainbows, for me... For me... For me..."
As the music faded out, Arthur found himself drenched in tears. In felt good to finally let them out; all his emotions, all his pain.
"At least I'll see you tomorrow again, right? I'll only leave at sunset." Alfred whispered, still holding Arthur in his arms.
"Yes... That would be delightful." He tried speaking normally, but his voice was drained and broken. His breath still unsteady, his clutched onto Alfred like his life depended on it.
"But I want you to do something for me when we reach there: bring Lili along."
As they reached the bakery, the server behind the counter wasn't Francis, but someone with a bright smile and a pair of lovely eyes.
"Ah, Francis told me about you. Mr Kirkland, Alfred and... I'm assuming you're Mrs Kirkland?"
"S-Soon to be." She stuttered, suddenly at a loss of words.
"Francis had told me about someone working on behalf of him today. What do I address you?" Arthur asked, as the server eyed Lili and back at Arthur.
"Elizabeta is fine."
To be continued...
A/N: Status: Desperately trying lengthen the chapters. Thank you for understanding.