Disclaimer - I don't own it. Tear, tear.

"Rose, I know what you're thinking, and I've killed more than one Strigoi. I killed 5. And unlike you, I kill Strigoi due to actual skill, not raging diarrhea that happens to tell me when a Strigoi is near. Which is also completely disgusting, and something you should keep to yourself. In fact, I think you should get that problem checked out, because everyone knows girls can't go to the bathroom. I secretly believe you're a man, and this could only be proof of the fact. And of course, if you were a man that would explain a lot, like how you start more fights than any guy I know, date guys only because you think it's 'socially acceptable,' and eat more than a hockey team for obese teenagers. Boy, Mason was always scared he was dating a lesbian, imagine how terrified he'd have been to know his girlfriend was actually a guy." Oh yeah, he went there. Half of us made booing noises at Eddie. Eddie was Mason's best friend, so if anyone could say these things without causing an actual uproar, it was Eddie. It was just something we weren't prepared for. And since most of the people in this room personally knew, and loved Mason, it came as a painful shocker to us.

"Oh, too soon?" Eddie cooed. Huh... He must have seen these things before.

"You only wish I was a man because that would've meant you had a shot with Mason yourself! Yeah, he told me your secret, Mr. Edison Castiles. Or should I say, 'Excited Eddie?'" I exxageratedly gaze towards his pants.

"Rose, you wouldn't know a gay man if they hit you with their purse and their mascara went flying out. You'd still come onto them. Heck, if there were a rock that even slightly resembled a man, you would come onto the rock, too."

"At least the rock would've experienced more action than you!" I retort.

"That should hardly count. If I wanted some action, all I would have to do is get a cane and pass myself off as a seventy year old man, you'd be all over me. After all, isn't that what Belikov and Ivashkov did? I mean, come on, how old does a guy have to be to interest the infamous Rose Hathaway?" This is what I love about Eddie. Through all the jokes today, Eddie's have been the most crude and inappropriate. Well, maybe besides Abe's dirty little slip. But my back an forth banter with Eddie was just so simple. Unrehearsed, unplanned, just playful and fun. He was like my comedic equal partner. Well, Mason was like my comedic equal partner, but then of course being his best friend for years allowed his fun-loving joking ways to rub off on Eddie as well.

"97," Abe yelled, answering Eddie's hypothetical question, and disturbing my train of thought. "And no sex!"

"I think my dinosaur of a boyfriend will attest to the fact that there is sex. Lots of sex." There, see how you like it, Zmey. I knew Dimitri would be embarrassed, after all, he never speaks of his sex life. But, hey, you only live once right? Anyway, he'll have a chance at rebuttal on his turn.

"Yes," Eddie replies sarcastically, "Lots of pedophiliac, illegal, cradle-robbing sex. But that's nothing compared to the other illegal things Rose gets herself, and may I add, others, into."

"Okay!" Lissa squeaks as she takes Eddie's place at the podium, "I think it's about time we get Mia up here! Come on everyone, give Mia a hand!"

"Love ya Belikov and Rose!" Eddie yells, blowing Rose, then Dimitri a kiss.

"Hey!" Adrian yells, faking heartbreak. "Blowing kisses is my thing!"

A/N - thanks for reading and for the awesome reviews, love you all!

luvizu - Thanks much!

Midnight Vampire 333s -XD I'm slightly terrified about writing Abe. I haven't thought of much for him yet.

JACOBS-GURL-FOREVER - Awe, your review made my day! :D glad you like it so much, and I'm definitely going to try to keep up with the chapter per day.

BelikovsRoza1697 - Thanks, I hope Eddie's turn was to your liking. :)

SMARTCUTEFUNNYXD -Lol, thanks for the review! Hmm, I've always found that to be an inconvenience, I promise I won't continue with doing these at the bottom if there's over 10 reviewers per chapter, but for now, it's just quicker for me.

Fruit-Salad818 -Awe, yay! I'm so happy!