Chapter 4

Lexi woke up in a sweat, looking around the dark dorm room in a panic. Nothing seemed wrong, it was quiet, everything seemed in its place. Now that she was awake, she couldn't even remember the nightmare that woke her, but the lingering fear from the dream prevented her from falling back to sleep. Quietly she got out of bed and went for a jog.

The night was just beginning to give way to morning and a light mist hung in the cool air. The jogging path around the school was mostly empty. A couple of die-hard joggers had passed her, but other than that she had the track to herself.

Hoskings had arrived safely on Elysium and she missed him dearly. She had no idea when she would have a chance to see him again. She also worried about him. Increasing attacks on the outer colonies had been the hot topic during graduation last week. The recruiting lines at the base had grown as each new report of attacks came in.

She made her way back to the dorm, showered, packed her few belongings and headed for the public shuttle that would take her to the base. She was nervous and now questioned the sanity of her decision to join the military, but she had already signed the paperwork and the one thing everyone knew about Shepard was that she was stubborn. As she stood in front of the building she hesitated. She couldn't help but think about JJ and when he'd been recruited.

She entered the building and followed the signs for 'New Recruits', eventually ending up in a small intake room with about a dozen other men and women. She went up to the window and the clerk took her name. The nervousness in the room was palpable and she went to a corner and leaned into it.

...

Major Frederick McMann looked out into the intake room and sighed. His rotation into training always seemed to coincide with the worst looking recruits. How was he supposed to turn this group into soldiers? He sighed, thinking, 'This is going to be a long fourteen weeks'. Out of the fifteen recruits assigned to this training session, only eleven showed up on time. He expected three or four to drop out today alone, but that was his job; weed out anyone not committed a hundred percent to being a soldier.

The clerk handed him the datapad with the names of the recruits and he tucked it under his arm, adjusted his hat and opened the door to the intake room.

"Alright people!" he boomed. "Line up!"

He watched as they straggled into a line. "C'mon people. This ain't Sunday School! Ten-hut!"

The group slowly lined up, came to order and stood at attention. "I don't do long speeches. What I expect is that you will work to your maximum capacity and then go beyond. If you don't," he pointed, "there's the door. You weren't told to come here. You came of your own free will. Remember that."

He walked down the line and eyed the young, nervous, frightened faces in front of him. "Today is the first day of the worst fourteen weeks of your life." He moved back to the front of the line. "Follow me and we'll start with your gear."

He led the motley group to the supply building first; where they received their dress uniform, their casual uniform and three sets of workout clothes. He then led them to the barracks and assigned them lockers to store this clothing in. After their gear had been stowed and everyone had changed into their military sweats, they were given a marching tour of the entire base. It was well past noon by the time McMann led his new group to the mess hall for lunch.

After lunch, the group was taken to a classroom for initiations and then to the shooting range for the first of many lessons. The final stop of the afternoon was the training grounds, where the group had to run an obstacle course. McMann watched as each of the new recruits made their way through the course and their time was documented on a board. Shaking his head when they were done, he said, "That's the sorriest starting times I have ever seen." Recruits stood around panting, exhausted from the day's events. The group marched back to the mess hall for dinner, then to the classroom again. Finally the group was taken to their barracks where they were assigned their cots for sleeping .

...

I can't believe I've been here for seven weeks already! We were actually given a three day leave for making it half-way. I don't have anywhere to go, so I'm staying here and trying to get better at everything. It seems no matter what I do, I keep making dumb mistakes. I study hard but get average grades, I practice at the target range and I get average scores, and I work out hard but my time is just average on the obstacle course. AVERAGE! I want to be the best at something...anything.

And...what is it about me that makes everyone want to tell me their problems? I do listen and try to help them though.

My days are really busy. First thing is the morning workout, then breakfast and classes. After lunch we have military training, then dinner. After dinner, there's time to study, then the evening run. Any free time I've had I've used to try to improve myself - which is why there aren't any entries. McMann says the next seven weeks are even harder.

...

McMann looked over the personnel logs that he was keeping on his trainees. He had several promising recruits, but he also had reservations about each one. Barnes, a big hulking brute was the best on the obstacle course but his class work was subpar. Santo held high marks in weaponry, but lacked any social graces. Vokov had the highest grades but was terrible in the athletics department.

McMann put the logs down and shook his head. What had started as eleven recruits was down to six. He had the feeling he would lose more during the grueling space training that started after break. He got up from his desk, stretched and decided to head over to the rifle range for some target practice to clear his head.

As he entered the equipment room, he heard shooting from the range and wondered who might be there. He listened for a moment and picked up a pistol to practice with. The sounds of a sniper rifle echoed across the firing range. The only person there was in the last stall and had stopped firing. McMann heard the motor grinding as the target was being brought up front. He walked down past all the stalls as Shepard stepped into the hallway with her target. All the holes were in great kill zones, but she didn't look happy. "Great shooting, Shepard!" McMann said, encouragingly.

She frowned, "But it's just an average score."

He shook his head. "All those shots are good hits. Do you think the enemy cares if you get perfect scores?"

She looked at him, thinking. "I need to be better than I am." She stated.

"Why?" He asked.

"I need to be able to fight." She stated flatly.

"You can fight. What more do you want? You already do better than the average in all your subjects, you get good scores with most weapons and you have a decent time on the obstacle course." He watched the emotions play out on her face as she considered.

"I'm only average. I need to be the best..." she trailed off, it sounded lame when she said it out loud.

McMann snorted, "That kind of thinking will get you nowhere fast and if you go into battle with that kind of attitude you could get killed worrying about taking the best shot. As long as you are doing your best and trying your hardest, you have succeeded."

Shepard shrugged, "If you say so..."

"I do. Now why are you here and not in town celebrating the halfway point with your squad? Teamwork and camaraderie are just as important as target scores, if not more so." McMann said, then added, "I can make it an order..."

"Yes, sir!" Shepard said and saluted before she left.

'I'll have to keep my eye on that one.' McMann thought as he picked a stall, set up his target and began firing.

...

McMann was right. All I needed was to join the squad in town. I found them at the downtown pub. Barnes taught me how to play pool, I beat Santo and Kelly at poker and Vokov and I had a drinking contest. I feel better than I have in ages. Maybe I'll be able to survive this last seven weeks of training after all.

...

McMann looked over the five graduates proudly. They were going to all be assigned to the same ship and squad, based on his recommendation to keep them together. "It has been an honor and a privilege to be your training officer. You have come a long way from that day we met in the recruitment center and you have exceeded all of my expectations. Best of luck in your career."

He turned to the table and picked up a badge, "Serviceman 3rd Class Jeffrey Barnes". Barnes stepped forward and McMann pinned the rank to Barnes' uniform. McMann shook Barnes' hand and said, "Congratulations." Barnes stepped off to the side, beaming at the small audience that had gathered for the ceremony.

"Serviceman 3rd Class Yolanda Kelly." Kelly stepped forward, smiling. McMann pinned on her new rank and shook her hand, "Congratulations." Kelly blushed and stood next to Barnes.

"Serviceman 3rd Class Luis Santo." Santo stepped forward. McMann said, "Serviceman Santo achieved a top score for marksmanship and receives a special award." McMann pinned a different colored badge to Santo's uniform, next to the 3rd class badge. "Congratulations." McMann shook Santo's hand and Santo, looking slightly embarrassed, stood next to Kelly.

"Serviceman 3rd Class Alexis Shepard." Shepard stepped forward. McMann looked her in the eyes as he pinned the badge on her uniform. "Congratulations." She shook his hand firmly and stepped over to Santo.

"Serviceman 3rd Class Ivan Vokov." Vokov stepped forward and McMann pinned the last badge. "Congratulations," he said as he shook Vokov's hand. Vokov stood next to Shepard.

"Thank you all for coming," he paused, looked proudly over the graduates and then shouted, "Ten-hut! Dis-missed!" Saluting the Major, all five shouted as the audience clapped and cheered.

A small reception had been planned in the mess hall and the new soldiers entered to see their loved ones and invited guests mingling and celebrating. She felt a little left out, she had no one here to celebrate her achievement with.

Kelly caught her attention and waved her over. "Shepard. I'd like you to meet my fiancé, Peter Madison." The handsome man took his arm from around Yolanda's waist and thrust out his hand.

Shepard shook it, saying, "It's a pleasure to meet you. Kelly has told me a lot about you."

"I've heard a lot about you as well. Thanks for keeping her grounded." He had a dazzling smile, but it was all for Kelly.

Shepard smiled at them and said, "It was easy, she's a good soldier."

Kelly nodded, but was already reabsorbed into talking with her fiancé. Shepard shook her head. She couldn't feel truly jealous, she liked Kelly too much and honestly wished her luck and happiness. It was hard to be military and married. She had heard the depressing stories passed around in the mess hall about the divorce rate.

She moved among the small crowd, making sure to stop and speak with each of her squad's family and friends that had come to the ceremony. When she headed for the door to leave, McMann stopped her.

"Leaving so soon?" he asked.

She looked around the room at her squad mates happily visiting with their loved ones. "I don't want to intrude."

"I'm sure they don't feel that way." He said, "Your family couldn't make it?"

"No, but it's okay," she smiled.

"Well, best of luck on the Britania. I hear she's been doing border patrols to keep the pirates at bay," he looked at her wistfully. "I get to start another training session in two weeks."

She looked at him, "When do you get to go back to your ship?"

"After this group of trainees, I head back to the Gernsback," he said. "I will keep an eye on your career, Shepard. I think you will accomplish great things."

"Thank you. It's been an honor, sir." She stood formally and saluted him.

McMann saluted back and watched her leave. 'Yes, I really do think she will do great things.' He thought to himself as he went back to making his rounds of the party.

Shepard was about to head over to the barracks when she was approached by a Communications staff member. "Serviceman Alexis Shepard?" she asked.

"Yes?"

"I have a communiqué for you." The woman handed Shepard a sealed envelope, saluted and left.

Shepard turned the envelope over and quizzically opened it. It was a message from Hoskings.

"Congratulations on your accomplishments! I wish I could be there to give you a big embarrassing hug. Hope to see you soon. Love, Doc."

She smiled. He always seemed to know when she needed cheering up.

...

Time sure flies! I know I've been remiss with my journal entries. Things have been happening fast and furious. Our squad has been kept busy, between learning how things run on a ship and handling our rotation to ground patrol.

The Batarian pirates have been raiding colonies with more frequency, taking food, weapons and people to sell. Our ship goes to each colony and picks up one squad while leaving another as their replacement to protect it. Our tours on these colonies last roughly four to six weeks, depending on whether things are going smoothly at the other colonies.

I've seen more places than I ever thought I would, and their names are starting to blend together, but if the Alliance had been doing this three years ago, Mindoir might have survived.