Ch. 4:

Jazzy POV:

"Jasper. How the hell did you get Alice to go out with you? It's an impossibility! It's just plain wrong! You two are from completely different worlds! You can't even flirt! It's just not fair!" Emmett ranted. His voice was annoyingly loud. GOD! Why can't he just learn to SHUT IT! " She's popular too bro!" Emmett continued "and you're...you're...NOT!" NOT POPULAR? NOT-FREAKING-POPULAR? Who the hell does he think he is? Would I even be near Edward if I wasn't popular? I don't freakin' think so! Just as I was about to throw out a terribly insulting comeback Edward spoke up.

"Just give it up Emmett! Just because you can't get a date with Rosalie doesn't mean you have to cuss out Jasper when he gets a girl! Shut your mouth before I shut it for you!" Edward's threat was weak, but Emmett knew his place. You don't mess with THE Edward Cullen. It's like an unwritten rule of high school. Jocks are Untouchables. And the Captain is the most untouchable. Edward was too popular for his own good." Sorry Ed. I'm just frustrated okay! How on Earth does Jazzy-pooh get a date before me! It's just not right!" Oh. My. God! LAUREN FLASH BACK! LAUREN FLASHBACK! EWWWWWW!!!

"MY. NAME. IS. NOT. JAZZY-POOH , EMMIE-BEAR-CUDDLE-MUFFIN!"

I saw Emmett flinch as I called him by his nickname.

"At least I don't stutter like a retard when I talk to a girl! 'Wwwww-ould yyy-ou llike tto have ddinner with me ttonight?'" OH NO HE DIDN'T! Emmett mocked me! MOCKED ME FOR CHRIST'S SAKE! LIKE A TWO YEAR OLD! HOW DARE HE!

"I do not stutter you stupid ass! I was cold and my teeth were chattering!"

"That is possibly the lamest excuse I have ever heard in my entire existence! IT WAS SEVENTY-FREAKIN- DEGREES OUTSIDE YOU MORON!"

"I have a naturally cold body temperature!" God. I sound like a retard! Naturally cold body temperature? Way to be manly Jasper! Way to be manly.

" Uh-huh. Sure. I soooo believe you. Heavy on the sarcasm."

"Emmett, I can obviously spot the sarcasm dripping from every word you've said! You don't have to tell me 'Heavy on the sarcasm' every freaking time! It makes you sound like a dork!"

"No it doesn't! Your just extremely jealous of my awesomely-awesome comeback skillz!" Awesomely awesome? WTF!

"Is today just National-Let's-All-Go-Piss-Off-Jasper-Day or something? 'Cause this is ridiculous!"

"Yep, Jasper! The whole world is out to get you! Everyone hates you! Are you happy NOW! HEAVY ON THE SARCASM!!"

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" That was it! I raised my hand and I bitch-slapped my best friend! He suddenly stopped short. He didn't look angry, just amazed. Like a deer caught in headlights.

"Did you...did you just slap me?"

"Yep." I said, popping the P. " I think I did."

"Oh. O...kay?" He was still completely out of it. I thought it was funny. When I started to laugh, Emmett suddenly realized that someone, I being that someone, had just slapped him.

"You just slapped me!" Emmett accused.

"Yep. Uh-huh. That was me!" I said proudly. "Wat cha' gonna do 'bout it?"

"I have no idea." He said. "But, you're gonna get it, Jasper you're gonna get it!" His voice changed from simply astounded to threatening. I stopped my laughing and we both engaged in a glaring match. This was just too much for both of us and we instantly began howling in laughter! Then a thought popped into my head. Where the hell was Edward?