Good Boy Mike
Disclaimer: Don't own anything.
Texas let himself have a nice little grin as Stronghorn revved to life underneath him. 9Lives answered with her own roar, and he cracked his neck. All the cars were stuffed with super-spore grenades and darts, and he held a few in his off hand, ready to toss out the window. "All right, Terras... It's time for Texas to pound your faces! TEXAAAAS!"
They tore out of the dark garage in an explosion of concrete wall and cardboard, showering the area with enough super spores to latch every Terra to the ground where they stood. Only straight gunning the engine kept their cars out of the tangling mess. Caught off guard, almost none of the Terras were armed. They few that were shot for anything that moved, which included the holo-duplicates of 9Lives and Stronghorn that Julie projected from the real 9Lives. Spore bolts passed right through the holograms and into other Terras or onto the sides of buildings, but by sheer luck, they never hit the real cars.
Julie breathed a sigh of relief and held her finger over the tow cable toggle. She had Whiptail at the ready for Dutch and Chuck, and she was coming up fast on the prison cell building. Her comm snapped open. "Dutch, you and Chuck in position?"
Back in the jail, Dutch's hand hovered at the door handle. Chuck whimpered into his shoulder and shivered against his back, and he was sincerely wondering how Mike put up with him on a daily basis. "Ready when you are!"
"Then go!"
9Lives whipped into a tailspin and released the tow cable holding Whiptail. The car's autopilot engaged to stabilize the spin, and it skidded to a stop in front of the jail. Dutch and Chuck jumped for the doors, and Dutch was on the accelerator before Chuck could strap himself in. Joining back up with the rest of the Burners, Dutch tapped into the comms. "Okay, where are we on the plan?"
"Wreck shit!" yelled Texas.
Julie, more helpful, said "Texas and I have the super spores, just concentrate on taking out the chemical room."
"Oh jeeze!" Chuck wailed from the rear seat. "I am NOT used to facing backwards!"
"Get used to it fast!" Dutch floored the engine and spun Whiptail. Her rear weapon snapped into position and blasted a clean line of laser fire into a Terra building. Half the villagers surrounding Whiptail turned and ran to the smoking gash, freeing up the ground to drive. "All right, we're en route for Kaia's! You guys have the deer."
Texas piped in. "Roger-dodger!"
"Hey, I just thought of something," said Chuck. "About the plan?"
Julie commed in. "Yeah?"
"I don't know what the Mike drug looks like."
Texas popped in, his call filled with the background noise of Terra shouting and braying deer. "Can't you just do magic computer stuff like normal?"
Chuck brought up his screens out of reflex, only to have them all display the same "OUT OF SERVICE AREA" message he was expecting. "The Terras aren't exactly on the grid, Texas!"
Dutch's avatar jammed its way into the conversation, and Chuck got the weird experience of hearing both the comm Dutch and normal Dutch over his shoulder talking at the same time. "Maybe it'll be glowing green or right in the middle of a big obvious table!"
"Or, Mr. Set-it-on-fire, maybe just," Julie put the sarcasm on hard, "I dunno, set it all on fire?!"
"Look, I've had some time to think about it, all right?!" Chuck snapped back. "And it doesn't seem like the best idea to go into a building with a bunch of unidentified radioactive chemicals and then start a fire!"
"It's too late to think of another option, Chuck!" Dutch popped the back hatch. "We're here! Hurry up and go in!"
"Look, if you see something that's obviously the Mike drug," said Julie, "Grab it and we'll have Jacob analyze it. Maybe we can make an antidote or something. Until then, stick to the plan!"
"Oh jeeze oh jeeze oh jeeze-"
Who just put their name on their house?! Jacob had his name on the grocery store but he didn't label his house with great big neon letters that said "JACOB" like Kaia had "helpfully" done with hers. And did she even live here, or was it just where she kept all her stuff? How was a drug supposed to be obvious? These were the panicked thoughts that scrambled through Chuck's head as he threw himself into the dark chemical den. He spent a few seconds blind, adjusting to the dark and stumbling over chair legs and into a wall before he could see again. Laser fire and yelling from outside echoed through Kaia's house/office/base, but nothing inside was making any noise. He was the only one inside, and as he entered the kitchen/lab of Kaia's place and took in the sight of warm equipment, lit bunsen burners, and dripping flasks, he figured this was a recent development. He pulled his shirt up over his nose.
True to his worries, he had no idea what most of this stuff was if it wasn't clearly labeled. "Clearly" was a touch of an understatement, too, as the labels on the jars and cans were all hand-written, sometimes in pencil, and many of them were wet and smudged. His eyes fell on something odd, though: one shallow dish under a pipette, the pipette full but the dish suspiciously empty and sizzling. It put off a smell that made his tongue numb, even through his shirt. Why would this one be empty? Whatever was in there, they took it with them, and in a hurry.
Chuck gasped. This had to be it.
Now he had to set it on fire and run. Great. Every instinct in his body told him not to do this. Stalling, he commed Julie. "So- bad news! The thing that looks like it'd be the Mike drug? Totally empty. I think they might already have it."
"Oh no. Oh no, oooh no-" Julie's voice was almost drowned out by the panicked braying of deer outside her windows. "Oh no. Um. Any idea where it- we gotta worry about it later. Stick with the plan! Light the place up!"
Dutch jumped in. "Need me to do it?"
"NOT WHILE I'M IN THE BUILDING!" Chuck screamed. Easiest safest way to set a room full of hazardous, flammable, potentially explosive chemicals on fire- Chuck really should just never contribute plans ever again. He hated this one already and it was his idea! Why did he- he nearly kicked himself. Okay, how to do a time delay? Maybe he could make something into a wick- maybe there was potassium or sodium that he could drop into a sink full of water- no that was an even worse idea, if the Terras tried to put it out with more water- maybe if he just tipped a bunsen burner over and let it sit? But that might not make a big fire fast enough-
Dutch's avatar flashed on, and he screamed. "WE GOT MIKE!"
The feed cut off with the heady crunch of something smashing through Dutch's windshield, and Chuck mentally said "SCREW IT" and swept his arm over the entire counter. Fires immediately flared up where he tipped over burners and spilled chemicals on top of them, and he ran from the building with heat licking against his bare back.
Out on the flats of the village, Chuck could see it; the blue fire of Mike's staff whipping in and out of Dutch's windshield while Whiptail did donuts trying to shake him. Chuck snapped his slingshot into his hand and took aim for Mike's hands, and just as he had a clean shot, something behind him exploded and knocked him to his feet. The plasma ball few past Mike's head, distraction enough to shake his footing and send him rolling over Whiptail's roof. Mike was back on his feet effortlessly, eyes scanning the ground and settling on a new target: Chuck.
"SoooMEBODY COME GET ME!" Chuck took off on all fours before his legs caught up with the rest of him. Mike was on his heels in seconds. "ANYBODY!"
"Texas is on it!" Texas pulled into a turn hard. Mutt swung out behind him and fishtailed him into Chuck's path lengthwise. He threw the door open and sprinted directly for Chuck and Mike, gunchucks at the ready. "You've been a bad boy, Mike! Time for a spanking from DADDY TEXAS! HWOO-AAAH!"
Chuck dove low, and Texas jumped up into a flying roundhouse. While Chuck ducked under and bolted for Stronghorn's back seats, Mike's staff met Texas's shin and knocked him straight to the ground. Every bit of Texas stung like electricity on his funnybone for a split second before he sprung back on his hands and onto his feet. "Okay, that's one match point, Tiny, just-"
Mike's eyes met him, and Texas felt like he was going to puke. Mike gasped for breath through loud, pained guffaws of laughter. His skin shined with sweat and a constant roll of tears down his cheeks, his eyes dilated and red and puffy and darting all over Texas's face, struggling to focus. His hair was rumpled and stuck to his sweaty face; his shirt sat wrinkled and partially untucked. The grip on his staff was quivering and unstable, like his treasured weapon was trying to fight its way out of his hands and winning. Worse was his smile, normally confident, now so tight and wild that it showed nearly as much gums as teeth.
"Woah!" Texas jumped back. "You are SERIOUSLY tweaked, Mike."
Mike sobbed until he was giggling. "I don't want to do this..."
Texas barely dodged the staff blade as it cut through where his shoulder had been before. Texas whipped his gunchucks over his shoulders and held them taut.
"I don't wanna either, Mike," Texas said with a sigh. "But, you gotta admit... it'll be really cool."
Texas dove in at full Texas-ified strength, gunchucks against fire staff in the hand-to-hand battle of the century. Texas held Mike on defense for a few precious seconds. His gunchucks landed on the flats of Mike's staff, staying away from the metal-cutting flames for the moment, but his legs didn't have the reach to sweep Mike's footing out from under him. Every little inch of ground he gained was dodged without effort, and as they fell into a rhythm, Texas could feel each blow coming with a little more force behind it, a little faster than the last time. Mike, even tweaked, was learning his attack pattern, and his muscles clenched in anticipation for Mike's starting blow.
It never came. Instead, a laser shot out the ground under Mike's feet and sent him flying backwards.
"Do you KNOW how hard it is to replace the windshield on this car?!" Dutch screamed from Whiptail. He shook his head, clearing the little beads of windshield glass out of his hair. "Not to mention you nearly took my nose off!"
"What'd you do that for?!" Texas howled. "We were fighting like men and you-"
Chuck shrieked from Stronghorn, "TEXAS GET BACK IN YOUR CAR AND DRIVE!"
"Focus, boys!" 9Lives peeled into the scene, followed by seven other 9Lives. The holograms were set to mirror her moves, and she pulled 9Lives into a donut around Mike. It made an effective wall of cars around him, staggering Mike while he tried to find the real 9Lives in the blurr of yellow and black. "If Mike's here, then Kaia's not far behind! Stay in your cars and keep them moving! Don't let Mike into Mutt!"
Up above, watching from a high branch, Kaia couldn't aim. Julie's stupid holo-car even cast artificial shadows on the ground, and she couldn't peg Mutt with a super-spore bolt without endangering her own schedule. Texas and Dutch's cars weren't worth a bolt, even while they were idling. Her arms were quivering in frustration. All of her hard work and months of planning, all going to hell overnight because she thought she could just hold the Burners indefinitely. She'd rushed out of Mike's training once reports came to her of the Burners escaping, of them smothering half their prize deer in tangling vines and cutting down swaths of the forest with their car's weapons. She'd sent Mike out on his own in a panic, and now he was proving himself undependable unless she was right at his shoulder giving him orders. Perhaps she had rushed this plan, yes, but she wouldn't let it be ruined by a bundle of stupid children!
"Kaia! Kaia, there you are!" Her lead scientist scrambled onto the branch beside her. "I couldn't find you in the- I thought you'd be- the final dose! I have it! It's ready!"
He pulled her free hand right off her crossbow and put the dart and blowgun directly into her palm, closing her fingers around it. "This is our only chance! It will take months-"
"I understand." Kaia took a calming breath. She couldn't be short with her own people; she would save it for Kane in Deluxe. She retracted her crossbow and tucked the dart and blowgun away in her belt pouch. "Can I trust the village to you while I head for Deluxe?"
"Yes, Kaia!"
"All right. Get the deer free. I'm heading out alone."
Kaia dove from the high branch, spreading her wings to slow her fall and block the sight of the Burners off from Mike once she's landed. His attention snapped to her. "Mike, new orders. Get us to Mutt and drive to Deluxe, fast as you can."
Back in the cars, Chuck nearly jumped out of his skin. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!"
"Oh yeah, Kaia has giant killer moth wing-a-lingies," said Texas as he buckled in. "You weren't there for that."
Mike sprinted into the wall of 9Lives without hesitation. Julie, seeing him right in the path of her front wheels, slammed on her brakes and cracked the steering column in the opposite direction. She spun out of Mike's way while the holograms passed through him harmlessly.
He knew she'd hit the break, she thought to herself. He knew she wouldn't run him over. She wanted to slam her head into the nearest wall in frustration, but now wasn't the time for it; before Stronghorn's wheels could stop spinning against the grass, Mike's staff sliced straight through the tow cable hitch on the car's back bumper. Mutt bounced free, and Mike and Kaia slipped right into the front seats. Mutt growled, the engine fired, and Mike slipped right through the other three cars like they'd been sitting still.
"Go! GO! GO AFTER HIM!" Julie slammed 9Lives into gear and tore off after Mike, Stronghorn and Whiptail on her flanks.
"They're headed for the bridge!" gasped Texas.
"That must mean they have Kane's dose of the drug!" intuited Chuck. "We can't take on Mike AND KaneBots!"
"That just means we gotta stop him before he makes it to Deluxe!" Dutch answered.
Mutt gave a shrieking snarl and boosted ahead by nearly two lengths of car. Julie swallowed hard. This wasn't going to be any kind of easy. None of the cars by themselves were fast enough to catch up with Mutt.
"Wait! We can intercept him!" Chuck spread his screens out over Stronghorn's back seat and started scoping out the routes. "If they try to go the shortest route, they'll hit civilian traffic and get bottlenecked. I'm sending maps to all of you. Follow this route, and we should be able to get ahead of him!"
"This is it, guys!" Julie commanded. "It's now or never!"