Title: Life is like...
Character: Alphonse Elric
Word count: 426
AN: Don't know when I'll get around to writing any more of these. (I'll take suggestions!) There's one I've got planned for Roy, likening wife to the science of taking a woman out on a date (Not that I actually believe he's actually that shallow; I am aware that his promiscuity is essentially a cover, however since it makes up such a good chunk of his life I figure it's worth writing about. Comparing life to fire or some variation thereof would be too cliche.)
I've had a lot of time to think about this, and I've come to a conclusion: Life is like my armor. It's neither good nor bad. It's a source of shame and hope, parallel but intertwined, so that I could not imagine life without this armor, just as I view life in general.
Now, don't get me wrong: One doesn't wake up one day and decide to maim oneself by becoming trapped as a soul in a suit of armor.
However, I can't help not regretting that day. Is that sick of me? I don't know. What I do know is that transmuting Mom was the best and worst thing that ever happened to me. Worst for the obvious reasons. Best for the sense of fulfillment I get from it. How can one feel fulfilled while trapped in a suit of armor? It stems from the sense of relief I carry. If Ed and I hadn't failed to bring her back, if we hadn't made the biggest mistake of our lives, I would have always wondered and feared that there was a way to bring her back and I had been too afraid to try it. The doubt would have haunted me forever. As it is, I am haunted by my memories, but abstractly soothed by them as well.
The human transmutation is, as I said, the best and worst thing that ever happened to me.
His armor, this sick metal body that can't feel and can't cry, is a constant reminder of what I have lost and what I have gained in return. For this reason, isn't a suit of armor the perfect metaphor for life? It's filled with good and bad aspects, to the point where they're inextricable from each other. Suicide is throwing the baby out with the bathwater, so to speak, because you can't have joy without despair, nor health without sickness, nor relief without guilt.
My body is the symbol of my biggest shame, the worst thing that ever happened to me. However, my body is also what motivates me, and Brother as well, and so despite the horror of losing everything in the human transmutation, from our physical bodies to our intangible hope of seeing Mom again, I wouldn't change it for anything. Maybe that's what people mean when they speak of destiny. I don't know; I'm not a wise man by any counts, but I seems to me that I wouldn't be the same person if I wasn't in this armor, and that's not really such a bad thing.