Sup! Here's another interlude chronicling Sylphine's trek across the multiverse in search of her baby boy. It's taken so long because I had to decide what fandom would suffer her wrath next. Then it hit me: Fullmetal Alchemist.
To be fair, these interludes serve to knit my Reality of Chaos side stories together as well as show how these principles could be applied to almost any work of fiction. In fact so far I have over 10 that could tie into this directly or tangentially. The resulting swirl of entropic madness may or may not yield some of, all of, or more than the following 'eagerly' inquiring JUST WHAT THE FUCKING DEAL IS:
The Marvel Universe: Hands Off
The DC Universe: Parallels
Every fairytale being Disney either got totally wrong or lied out their ass about: Once Upon a Time in Everlie
An entire realm of ghosts: The Road to Hell is Paved with Good Intentions
A group of retro Scottish natives and the people assisting them adjust to temporal shift induced culture shock: Facade
A wholly different take on the afterlife complete with transforming swords: Megalomaniac
A group of mostly deluded but still powerful wizards and witches: Idiotproof is Highly Suspect Terminology
A gaggle of pretty soldiers in sailor suits with varying celestial abilities, lead by a crybaby who will jack you up if shit gets real. And the guy with access to kickass armour, a sword he knows how to use and psychic powers but chooses to fight evil in a flimsy tux and magic roses: n/a so far
A bevy of brawlers spanning multiple races and origins; several of which are prone to spontaneously rockin blue eyes and long blond hair if pissed: n/a so far
A young wild horse and the interesting times in which he lives: n/a so far but referenced in Hands Off
A pirate in yellow submarine and his bombastic (insane) group of frenemies: n/a so far
Two brothers and their angel buddy who seriously just want to know WTF...so they can gank it: n/a but referenced in several stories
A quirky info broker with a creepy fascination with humans and a debt collector with rage issues who really just can't even right now: n/a
Two genius brothers who just wanted to fix a mistake...that never would have happened if an anthropomorphic white blob hadn't been a lazy asshole: n/a but totally the point of this interlude.
Curiosity peeked? Onward!
*I2*
To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.
After it's world came into being, the entity known as Truth looked around at it's brethren across the multiverse...And said nope.
Spending eternity as a glorified babysitter to the insects he created that at any moment could destroy their own reality if he didn't pay close enough attention sounded as amusing as a hole in the head. So, Truth set forth to make it's own rules within the rules. Remove the need to have chaos mages by making the chance of such screw ups virtually impossible. Give them all equal access to the cosmic energy and make the taboo price so steep few would dare break it and even fewer would survive the cost. Make himself known to those dumb enough to try. And equivalent exchange would do the rest.
Things rolled on pretty smoothly. Until...
Van Hohenheim and Dante came in like a wrecking ball hellbent on changing the natural order Truth so carefully set in motion. These two dunderheads wanted to live forever when they had no right to, deciding mass genocide and swapping bodies like underwear was the way to do it. Even after the whole unpleasant side effect of their shiny new meat suits beginning to rot away from the inside out. The change happening faster with each body they stole. The pair having no understanding that the human body was not meant to handle the power of the Philosopher's stone- thus why homunculi could never be human in the first place. That the creatures' sanity deteriorated the longer they existed; if you could call the torture of memories and longings belonging to the dead person you were meant to be but never would sanity in the first place. That that damn stone was never meant to exist but thanks to that pair it did.
Then along came Edward Elric and by association his brother Alphonse. Unlike every other before them that tried human transmutation and failed, they not only set about fixing their mistake and doing some good along the way, the pair was willing to give up their chance once they learned the true cost of the stone they sought for 3 years. It wasn't worth the cost. And they actively tried to destroy it. The elder willing to sacrifice the thing that made him unique for to restore the younger to normal. Two children had a better grasp of the workings of the universe than a man and woman centuries old. There was just something about the two, their compulsion to set things right no matter what amused and confused Truth. He knew Ed would offer his Gate for his brother's body So, he was going to cut them a break or sorts; throw in his arm and leg for free..
Then this shit happened.
"Great. Back here again." Edward sighed. To be fair the Gate of Truth is where he wanted to be for this to work but still, he hated that featureless jackass as much as the bovine mammary secretions it reminded him of.
"GET YOUR LILY WHITE ASS BACK HERE!"
That...wasn't Truth. It was fair too feminine, too high pitched and too cheesed off.
"GAH! I told you I can't do it!"
That was it. Though a lot less haughty and put together than usual. Ed looked around until he saw the familiar deity booking it across the white abyss like it's metaphysical ass was on fire. Hot on it's heels a small (shorter than him!) girl, dressed like a Xingese warrior and armed with folding fans? That's not important. What was important were the bolts of lightning she was shooting off with them.
"Be reasonable child! Even if I wanted to help you, my world works differently than yours! I cannot open the gate without being paid a toll!"
"If you wanted to?!" she girl roared. "IF YOU WANTED TO?! I never asked to be here you freak, someone threw me here! How's about you open that gate and I don't make you shoot electricity out of your ass!? How's THAT for payment?!"
"What is going on? Al!" Ed's scan had completely missed the emaciated body propped up against the stone gate, being too distracted by whatever was happening off in the distance. It was only his soulless shell but still, he was right there! This had to work. Seeing him again was too painful for it not to.
The sound of a body hitting the ground then being stomped on like no tomorrow once again drew his attention back to the weirdness. Truth was splayed out face(?) down with the strange girl bouncing on it's back like a trampoline. Though Ed was fairly certain it didn't enjoy it at all as the girl seemed intent on breaking it's back The deity wailing pitifully all the way. This girl...how could she possible force something like Truth to beg for mercy?
"I give!" Truth hollered. "I give!"
"Then send me on my way!" The girl allowed the deity to stand. Her arms crossed over her chest expectantly.
"I CAN"T. Not without being paid a toll. Equivalent Exchange prevents me from just conjuring things without something in recompense." Seeing her left eye began to twitch, the Keeper held up it's arms in defense before hastily continuing. "You're not mortal! Your energy could do it though you might be weaker for some time once you pass. Or you could use him." The being thumbed back at Ed.
For a moment, she didn't seem to have heard the response. Standing completely still and just blinking at the blonde. Then her gaze drifted to Alphonse's body What was she thinking? Holy shit! Was she considering using them to pay her toll? She continued to just stare at the brothers, making all present uneasy. Especially when Ed noticed a growing spark of abject horror alight in her eyes. Her blank expression gave way to one of disgust and anger.
Truth tried to back up.
CRUNCH!
"You dipshit." came the cold reply. Truth now stood clutching it's face(?), blood trickling between its fingers. Ed couldn't help but have mixed feelings about the whole thing. On one hand she'd refused an offer to use them as cannon fodder, drawn her arm back and struck like a piston to make the prickliest thorn in his side bleed like a waterfall. On the other hand she had made Truth bleed- what was she to do that to a god like entity? Have it so terrified and be able to injure it at all?
"Will you stop that?!"
"You monster. You're no better than Vishnu; thinking it's perfectly acceptable to break the rules to suit your fucked up whims." Her voice remained level, only her glowing golden eyes betraying her fury. "You don't even FEEL it do you?"
"..."
Again with the staring, this time at Truth itself. Who despite having no face, managed to look ashamed with the girl's gaze boring into it like a laser. Until she sighed and buried her face in her small hands.
"You don't nor have no idea what to do about it. Outstanding." she groaned. "Why am I always cleaning up the messes caused by my aunts and uncles? I really thought you all were supposed to be sage and crap. Aside from Mama, Uncle Ebedi and Auntie Aurii, you all seem to be morons. There's a difference between bad luck a bass ackward logic you know that right?"
"Get off your high horse girl. You've no idea what you're talking about, you're just a mage-"
"Who, at present, could whoop your ass. By myself. Doesn't that seem a bit unbalanced to you?" Her stare was flat. "You've screwed with the way things are supposed to be so much, Affinity balanced things out the best way it could to keep this reality from cracking like a china plate. At least that shows you're slightly smarter than Vishnu. You traded your real power for whatever half baked version of order this is. Equivalent exchange is just another term for it. So, how's that workin for ya?"
"If you're so much smarter and more powerful than me, why don't you figure out how to leave?" Truth's tone was bitter with a sharp sting.
"I already have. And as a bonus, I'm gonna help you out of this mess."
"Or, you need to fix what's wrong so you can be on your way."
"To-may-to, to-mah-to. Don't be more of a dick."
By this time, Ed was certain he'd either had a stroke, was hallucinating, dead or something of the like. Words had officially lost any meaning. What the hell was going on?! The fact that both were now looking at him made him realize he'd shouted that last bit. Now (more) uncomfortable, he shifted around on his feet nervously.
"It's your lucky day Mr. Al-che-mist. My...guest may just be able to get you out of this with no toll." There was the smarmy condescending bastard Major Elric hated so much. It might have looked more imposing if not for the river of red running down its front.
"Stop trying to save face. You've lost all credibility, shut up." The girl shook her head, then flashed an angelic smile at the braided blonde. "What Truth meant to say was all the shit I'm sure you two've been through has given you so much karma credit it's ridiculous. And because he fucked up, the cosmic balance has put you on a pretty rough path to being where you truly belong. I'm Sylphine. Though the circumstances could be better, it's nice ta meetcha cuz!"
WHAT?!
*I2*
Far away, in the last reality the Goddess of the Storm had visited, sat a frazzled blonde desperately trying to appear as if everything was alright to those around him as he sipped tea poured for him by a small pigtailed girl. Sitting across from him, his younger brother not buying it for a second.
"You are aware that once our sweet little cousin realizes you derailed her to a reality that poses issues for those wishing to exit when her goal is simply to find her stolen child, she will at some point return here to violently castrate you and hand you your testicles in a jar yes, Onikunishi?" the brunette drawled.
The only response he received was the thump of a head making contact with wood and a loud groan from his elder brother.
"Please go away, Enma."
"Oh no. I intend to stay nearby to have a front row seat for that."
*I2*
Yup. Truth is the guardian of the Fullmetal Alchemist world. Meaning Ed and Al were supposed to be it's mages. Even though Truth tried to avoid creating them, the Affinity decided their existence was inevitable. One way or the other. Hence Truth not really recognizing them for what they were and perfectly okay with throwing the brothers under the bus..
Despite it all, Sylphine is still the same super sweet person from "The Road To Hell is Paved with Good Intentions"; willing to give her all to help even though she could avoid all the hassle it puts her through. It just so happens this time it's mutually beneficial and not just out of the kindness of her heart. And considering the situation with her missing son, it's a given her patience has become a rare comodity :P
Almost makes you pity Truth and Onikunishi. Almost.
Shameless Self Promotion:
This chapter has spawned another RoC fic "Equivalence is Relative" set in the FMA reality. Like the anime (2003 version is what I know besr) there'll be humor but I intend it as a more serious look at elements of how that world works.
Love it? Hate it? Complete indifference? Reviews are like hugs! Sirensoundwave out!