Chapter 3: More Dungeons, More Dragons

The Ocean

Vivian lifted the sorrowful party up to the surface, stretching her purple 'tail' longer and longer. Nobody could believe Bobbery was gone; the Topaz Star didn't come close to lightening the mood.

They eventually broke the surface and gasped and sputtered as their watery lungs were exposed to empty air. Nearby, Cortez's ship was moored, but it quickly turned and sailed towards the group.

They climbed aboard with heavy hearts and Cortez greeted them cheerfully, "arrr me hearties, why the long faces? Ye should be celebrating."

"But Bobbery…" began Goombella tearfully, "he-"

"Is right here!" boomed a voice from up in the crow's nest.

The group looked up to see the familiar Bob-Omb, no worse for the wear. "Bobbery!" they cried, he jumped down to them laughing.

"But how did you escape?" asked Flurrie, "we heard a dreadful explosion, and feared you had sacrificed yourself for the good of the show! – I mean, for us!"

"I'm a Bob-omb, madam," said Bobbery, "If we died each time we blew up, we'd be a very scarce race now wouldn't we?"

The group continued to talk and make merry on their way back to Rogueport, where after saying farewell to Cortez, they were on their way to the Thousand-Year Door.

The Thousand-Year Door Chamber

Koopie Koo was there, as was Luigi and a fair number of townspeople.

"Hey bro.!" said Luigi as Koops ran over to his girlfriend, "you'll never believed what happened! There was this giant dragon! And this Toad headhuntress started chasing him, trying to chop off his head! Eventually he flew away with a mighty 'roar'! Isn't that exciting?"

Mario was not impressed, "stop-a-making up stories Weegie."

"I'm not! Just ask Koopie Koo, she was there!"

Mario shrugged and stepped up to the platform, and another lightshow commenced. This time, the 10th (Silver) Star appeared inside a volcano, which appeared to the right of Hooktail's Castle, beneath the picture of the wormhole.

The people gathered 'round. "Oooh!" said Goombella, "that's Blaarg Volcano! It's really dangerous!"

"No, it's extinct!" said Koops, who had often looked to it in fear as a boy in Petalburg, before his adventurous father assured him it would never pose a threat to the young Koopa.

"It's still full of monsters," retaliated Goombella.

The group was so busy talking, they didn't notice Kammy peering at the map behind them, before flying away, cackling under her breath. However, Koopie Koo saw her.

"Hey! That's the same old woman from before!" she exclaimed, but when the group looked, the old Magikoopa was gone.

Mario shrugged and once again set right off on his latest quest, having gotten a good night's sleep on the trip back from Davey Jones' Castle. Koopie Koo accompanied them, since they were heading through Petalburg, and she needed to go home anyway.

Blaarg Volcano

After saying goodbye to Koopie Koo in Petalburg, and navigating the tediously maze-like forest, the group reached the dormant volcano. Unlike with the Kraken's Cave, the group walked right in; they were happy to find that the cave was illuminated by strange glowing mushrooms, and a lava pit here and there.

"I thought you said it was extinct?" commented Vivian to Koops.

"Well, I guess Dad lied… Again. He's always making reality seem safer than it is," whimpered Koops.

"Jeez, stop with the whining, I'm still a baby and you don't see me crying," said G-Yo, haughtily.

"Hey," said Goombella, reading her tattlelog, "Yoshis aren't supposed to stay young for extended periods of time: after eating a few enemies they grow to full size in no time, and some even hatch as adults."

"Well, I didn't hatch as an adult, and Mario keeps making me spit the enemies back out," said G-Yo, shooting Mario a dirty look; the plumber, however, took no notice.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," said Vivian, who had never liked Yoshi eating habits.

"It is a bad thing," huffed G-Yo, "After I became the Glitzville Champ I got ta go into that neato locker room, and you should see the food in Yoshi Monthly, there's Fire Flower Soup, Bean Fruit Cocktail, Barbecued Goomba-"

"WHAT!?!" shouted Goombella.

"Uh, but don't worry, I'd never eat that," said G-Yo hurriedly as the Goomba girl glared at him, "but, I'd still like to eat something that'll make me grow…"

They rounded a bend and found themselves faced with a whole heard of baby Blaargs, milling about in a small pool of lava. "Well sweetie," said Ms. Mowz to G-Yo, "eat away."

"Uh," he said, backing away, "no way! Adult Yoshis don't even eat Blaargs!"

"Aww, scared?" asked Koops.

"You're one to talk!" snapped G-Yo.

"Enough!" shouted Mario marching towards the pool, "let's-a-get this over with!"

"Wait!" shouted Vivian, "you're not going to hurt those innocent little babies are you?"

"They are not-a-little, and they're in our-a-way!" said Mario, brushing past the shadow girl, leaping onto the nearest Blaarg; the others followed suit while Vivian watched disapprovingly from the shore. Mario is so inconsiderate sometimes, she thought, maybe having a crush on him isn't all it's cracked-up to be.

After pulverizing the infants – which swam away crying – the group continued on, battling many more young Blaargs, but surprisingly, no adults. "I wonder if we're in some kind of nursery?" wondered Goombella aloud.

Mario ignored her and beat away another infant, 'rounding the bend into a large chamber, with a large lava pool at the bottom. The group looked down and saw hundreds of baby Blaargs in the pool, some were the same ages as the ones they had encountered in the caves, but many more looked like nothing more than wriggling little worms.

Vivian also noticed that many of the older Blaargs were injured, thanks to her friends.

Suddenly the group was roused out of their observations by a bone-chilling roar. Out of the lava rose a gigantic Blaarg; she stood up and looked down at the heroes, her small forearms waving in the air, her hands clenched into balls.

"You!" she cried, "you are the ones responsible for hurting my children! After we have raised young Blaarg here for years, you come along for no reason and attack? You will pay with your lives!"

"We have-a-beaten greater foes than you!" said Mario, "like Hooktail, and the Czar Dragon!"

"WHAT!" roared the Blaarg, "YOU were the ones who killed my mate! You have no idea what it's like being the widowed Queen of the Blaargs, living out your life alone! DIE!!!!"

After another long and difficult battle, Mario and his friends emerged victorious. "Where's the-a-Silver Star?" demanded Mario, at the semi-conscious Blaarg Queen.

"Urgh, if I tell you, do you promise to leave, and never come back and hurt my children again?" she asked groggily.

"Of course!" promised Vivian, still sorry about her friends' actions.

The Queen nodded and pointed to a ledge at the other side of the chamber, on it sat a treasure chest, "there," she said.

"Great," moaned Koops, "how are we going to get over there?"

Suddenly a pink and purple streak shot out of the sky and landed beside the chest. "Mweh heh heh!" cackled Kammy, opening the chest and holding the glimmering Silver Star above her head (just like Mario with the Shine Sprites from Super Mario Sunshine), "King Bowser will be soooo pleased!"

"Give that back! You old hag!" shouted G-Yo as Flurrie struggled to keep him from lunging off their ledge towards the old Magikoopa.

"Never!" shouted Kammy, before taking to the skies on her bamboo broomstick, laughing joyfully and disappearing through the roof of the volcano.

"Oh noooooo!" said Mario.

Bowser's Castle

After going through Petalburg and scolding Koopley about lying to his son about the volcano, the group returned to Rogueport where they caught a boat back to the Greater Mushroom Kingdom (where Toad Town and those other places are). Mario's party members were very excited, many never having been out of the Rogueport Area of the kingdom.

After a good night's sleep at his house, Mario led the group across the Kingdom to Dark Land, saying 'hello' to many of his old party members along the way. They eventually reached the volcanic mountain region ("not more volcanoes," moaned Koops) and made their way to Bowser's main castle, in the heart of Dark Land, fighting many baddies along the way (all of which G-Yo still refused to eat).

Inside there were more puzzles and more enemies; the group somehow made a wrong turn and ended up in a large tower Mario had never visited before.

"If you've been here so many times before, how did you get us lost?" said Vivian, who still hadn't forgiven Mario for hurting all those baby Blaarg.

"Maybe it's because he's never been accompanied by a bunch of nagging children," huffed Flurrie, tired of the constant bickering between the team members.

Mario once again ignored the dissention between his friends and opened a large pair of red doors, almost being blown away by the blast of noise that came out of the room.

The group stood in shock at what they saw before them, all eight Koopalings wreaking havoc in what appeared to be a playroom. The young Dragon-Koopas also froze and stared at the intruders. Then Roy, Morton Ludwig and Bowser Junior all jumped forward at the group, growling menacingly.

"Wait!" called their only sister Wendy, "Daddy told us not to get involved with Mario when he breaks in!"

"Yeah," added her rainbow-haired brother Lemmy, "He'll kill us!"

"If Mario doesn't, anyway," commented his bespectacled little brother Iggy.

"Zat's just because he doesn't vant us to get hurt again," said Ludwig, the oldest and wisest Koopaling.

"Yeah! And it doesn't look like Mario and his posse are going to back down anytime soon," said Morton Koopa Jr., the fast talking youngster.

"You bet we're not!" growled G-Yo at the much larger Koopaling.

"Yeah! We're-a-going to beat you into the ground, you-a-rotten brats!" said Mario, fiery hate burning in his eyes.

"Oh no," moaned Vivian, "not more child abuse."

"Don't worry, Viv, these kids are as rotten as they come!" said Goombella.

"But-" began Vivian, as Mario lunged forwards at the Koopalings, all eight of which sprung into action.

It was a hectic battle; Koopalings and party members flew every which way. Koopa guards ran frantically into the room to help the Koopa Princes and Princess, but were always stopped dead in their tracks by Vivian, who still refused to damage the Koopalings directly.

Eventually Mario and his friends managed to knock out every last enemy, and stood triumphantly, surveying the disaster zone, throughout which lay unconscious Koopas, of various species. But their victory was short lived.

"WHAT!!!!!!!!" hollered Bowser from the doorway, flanked by Kammy, who was holding the Silver Star, guarding it from thievery. "MY CHILDREN!!!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CHILDREN!!!!!!!! GRRRRRR, YOU'RE DEAD PLUMBER!!!!!!! DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" With that, Bowser charged the group.

Despite the fact that the group was pretty tired, and that Kammy kept healing Bowser and herself, Mario and friends eventually emerged victorious. Snatching the Silver Star from Kammy's limp fingers, they high-tailed it out of Bowser's Castle.

They had just reached the main doors when another Dark Yoshi flew into sight. "You may have beaten my little sister and brothers, but you're not getting past me, Lord Sandy!" she said menacingly as her army of evil Nega-dinosaurs surrounded the doorway.

"Come on! We'll use a different exit sweeties!" said Ms. Mowz, turning around, only to see the entire Koopa Army marching towards them, blocking the group from escape.

"Hahaha!" laughed the lab coat-clad, safety goggle-wearing Yoshi girl. She wore a green flower in her short blonde hair, but it did nothing to add to her nonexistent beauty. She took to the air on her bat wings (like her father, Shadow Yoshi) and swooped towards the heroes. "Now it's time to take you back to your precious princess!" she called, but Mario nimbly jumped out of her line of flight.

She angled upwards and turned around growling, "guards! Seize them!"

But before the Nega-creatures could obey, a second authoritative voice boomed out, "No! My guards seize them!" Everyone turned to see a bruised and battered Bowser standing behind his troops, fire dancing in his eyes.

"Shove off Has-Been!" jeered Sandy, "these punks are mine!"

"Stupid Yoshi! I've been fighting Mario for years, if anyone's going to get him, it'll be me!" he bellowed.

"Never!" called Sandy, "guards, change of plans: get Bowser's army!" The Nega-creatures obeyed and flooded past Mario and co., swarming Bowser and his troops.

"Noooo!" roared Bowser, jumping into the fray.

"Well, if nothing else, he's got stamina," remarked Goombella, to no one in particular.

"Now," said Sandy, "I'll finish you off myself." And she almost did; three battles in a row was very tiring, but Mario was able to handle it with his team. And, after another treacherous brawl, Mario and his friends won against Sandy, and were able to leave the still raging battle between the Koopas and Nega-creatures behind them.

Peach Interlude #4

Shadow Yoshi's Palace

Peach had a horrible few days and nights. She had been forced to eat the disgusting slop out of starvation, and found that it tasted worse than it looked. She was also very lonely; she even tried talking to that Birdo guard, but it never talked back. She hadn't had a good night sleep yet on that cot, and she was covered in dirt from head to heels from searching the room for some hidden escape root. How she wished there was a shower… or toilet paper.

Her ears suddenly picked up some familiar noises from the window. She jumped up and pushed the stool to the window, "Bowser!" she cried in relief at his friendly face, glad to finally have some company.

"Sorry I left so suddenly the other day," he said, "but I didn't want to get caught."

"I understand," said Peach, "but I do have some more questions."

"Fire away," said Nega-Bowser, more than happy to help.

"Well, I get the whole Nega-Realm thing, I guess, but what does Shadow Yoshi want with the Crystal Stars?"

"Well, I don't really know; everything I've learned about them was from Mario and his friends, but I suspect its because Shadow Yoshi wants to rule your world too."

"That's terrible!" exclaimed Peach, but she quickly calmed down, "don't worry, Mario will stop him – he always stops the bad guys."

"Yeah, well not around here," said Nega-Bowser glumly.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've been doing some digging, and I've learned that both the Nega-you, Mario, and Mario's brother are all petty thieves."

"What?" shouted Peach, Nega-Bowser winced at her shrill tone, Peach noticed, "oh. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell so loudly."

"It's okay, I was surprised when I found out the other me's a king."

Peach was silent for a minute and then asked, "Bowser, once Mario defeats Shadow Yoshi, what are you going to do? You're not going to live under his yolk forever are you?"

"No way!" exclaimed Nega-Bowser, "in fact, I'm planning a rebellion – me and all the other oppressed people. If a mangy plumber can save the world, so can I!"

Peach was surprised at his optimism, "that's great! But um, can I ask you a favor?"

"Anything."

"Can you get me outta here? The foods terrible and there's no personal hygiene."

"I can see," said Nega-Bowser, Peach looked down at herself; maybe the lack of a mirror was a good thing. "Well," continued Nega-Bowser, "I'll try. Stand back, Peaches!"

"It's Peach," she said jumping down, but she wasn't sure Nega-Bowser heard her as he breathed fire at the window bars, slashing at them with his claws and biting them at the same time. But as impressive as he looked, Nega-Bowser wasn't able to break the bars.

"Sorry," he muttered.

"It's okay, said Peach, climbing onto the stool again, "at least you tried."

"And I'll try again, I'm sure I can get some power tools from the Wario Brothers' charity; they'll do the trick for sure!" with that he started climbing down the wall.

"Wait!" called Peach, not wanting to be alone again.

"Sorry Peaches, but I've got to go – don't want to get caught y'know," and with that, Nega-Bowser disappeared from Peach's line of sight.

"It's Peach," sighed the princess, sitting down on the stool, and preparing for another boring, lonely night.

Bowser Interlude #4

Bowser's Castle

"Stupid! Stupid!!! STUPID YOSHIS!!!!!!!" growled Bowser as he stormed through his castle, "Stupid! Stupid!!! STUPID MARIO!!!!!!!"

Kammy came limping up behind him, "Your Defeatedness, the purple Yoshi girl got away from the Lakitus."

"Of course she did!" he muttered angrily, before entering the overused medical wing of the castle. "How are you kids doing?" he asked his eight children who were lodged in their own private ward, away from the hundreds of injured Koopa Troop members.

"We're okay," said Morton, always ready to chat, even when he had four broken bones and a concussion, "but, sorry we didn't get Mario."

The others all moaned and mumbled their own apologies but their father waved them off, "It's okay kids, but next time Mario bursts into your room, run away."

"Are you mad?" asked Larry fearfully.

"Of course not!" said Bowser, "now all of you, get to sleep: let that Magikoopa magic do its job!"

"Yes King Dad," they murmured in chorus, before they all drifted off to sleep. Bowser smiled and left the room, waving off the Magikoopa doctors' offers to heal his own wounds; Kammy had already taken care of most of them, and Bowser's own magic could do the rest. He'd rather have his troops fixed up ASAP anyway, so he could go kill Mario and those Dark Yoshis!

As they left the wing Bowser noticed Kammy grinning at him, "wheat is it, ya old hag?"

"Oh nothing, Your Paternalness," she said.

"Whatever, I've got a job for you," said Bowser, his staff was too short handed at the moment for him to put Kammy out of action as punishment for her sappiness. "I'm glad you got that Star for me – I was getting waterlogged out in the ocean – so, I want you to follow Mario, and steal the final Star once he gets it. But don't bring it back here, and make sure he knows your not coming back… I don't think the troops could handle it."

"Good plan, Your Deviousness, but how do you know there's only one Crystal Star left?" asked the old Magikoopa.

"Because," said Bowser, obviously proud of his deducing skills, "it would be the 11th star, and eleven rhymes with seven! Gwa ha ha!"

Kammy said nothing.