Are You Sure? (2028)

Al Potter sat in the recreated version of the Shrieking Shack, sipping on a cup of tea, dressed as a recently escaped from Azkaban Sirius Black. The young actress playing his Aunt Hermione was having a small breakdown, as she had been overwhelmed by the amount of lines she'd had to learn from the updated script pages that were delivered that morning. By now Al was used to having to absorb line changes quickly, as he'd been dealing with that specific job challenge for a few years. One of the assistant producers, a young guy named Austin who Al got on well with, caught Al's eye as he waved at him. Al motioned him over, and soon the two of them sat together.

"Think she'll be at it long?" Al looked over to the producer. "I'd like to actually go home at a decent hour for once."

"Possibly. There's more to it than just the new lines. Heard from one of the crew that her brother's gone missing."

Al nodded. There had been more and more of that as the war had dragged on, especially the last few months. "Where was he stationed?"

Austin shrugged. "Finland, I think. Maybe Iceland. You have some family over there, don't you?"

"Yeah. My cousin's around the front lines, last I heard. Luckily my wife's in Norway."

"Right. Forgot she was over there. Sorry. Heard from her lately?"

"Couple of weeks ago. They don't let them write very often." Al took another sip of his tea. "She's been busy, unfortunately. They need all the Healers they can get."

"Hopefully it'll all be over soon and everyone can come home. I'd really like to make something besides these historical rah-rah war pictures. Bet you're tired of Sirius Black."

"Sort of. You know he was my Dad's godfather."

"That's right." Austin raised an eyebrow at Al. "And didn't you grow up in…"

"Yes. It's actually my place now. Mum and Dad built a place over in Godric's Hollow."

"So when we're on the Grimmauld set you're at home. Potter, you've got a very odd life, has anyone ever told you that?"

Al saw someone waving at the two of them, and then all of the lights on the set suddenly came on as a bell began to ring.

Austin stood up. "Looks like that's it for today. See you tomorrow, Potter."

Grimmauld Place was quiet and dark when Al arrived at home. He walked through the house and did his usual routine, turning on only a minimum of lights, starting a fire in the fireplace with his wand and turning on some music, usually the Muggle music that he had grown to prefer. As a song came on that he hadn't heard in a long time Al thought of his godfather, all of those afternoons at Colony House in the office, listening to Muggle music and another of the extended lectures that his godfather loved to give about music. He pulled his hair back and tied it quickly, then began pulling items out of the refrigerator for his quick evening meal.

A loud knock at the front door pulled his attention sharply away from the sausages. Since his parents had moved to Godric's Hollow very few people stopped to see him, and those that did usually used the Floo. Al picked up his wand off of the counter and kept to the wall of the hallway as he made his way to the door.

"Who is it?"

The voice on the other side of the door was slightly muffled. "Hugo. Al, its Hugo."

"Bollocks. Hugo's been deployed. I'm not giving you an interview. If you're really Hugo Weasley what did you say at my bachelor party?"

"I asked if you could introduce me to Bernice Higgenbotham and if her breasts were real."

Al opened the door, shocked to see his cousin. Hugo's uniform was rumpled, his cloak was filthy and he looked as if he hadn't had a decent meal in months. "What the bloody hell…get in, get in!"

Hugo entered the house, and as soon as Al had closed the door he embraced his cousin. "Thank Merlin! Can't believe you're actually here! Good to see you, Hugo, what are you doing?"

Al hadn't noticed that Hugo hadn't really embraced him; instead he stood there as if he was paralyzed. Hugo took a deep breath.

"Al, can we sit down?"

"Sure, sure. Come on, tell me what's going on. How did you get back? Have you seen your parents yet?" Al half-threw himself into a large chair by the fireplace. "Merlin's pants, Hugo, you have no idea how good it is to see you."

Hugo Weasley looked down at his mud-splattered boots. He doubted if Al would ever be happy to see him again. "Al, when they told me I asked if they'd let me do it in person. I've got the letter here. Al…I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Hugo handed Al the letter, but Al kept looking at Hugo. "I'm sorry, Al. Everyone thought Norway was safe."

Al's voice was very, very quiet. "What…Hugo. No."

Hugo nodded. "Happened instantly. Entire hospital, all at once. I'm so sorry, Al."

Al sat back against the chair and looked down. With slightly shaking hands he opened the letter. Al shook his head, it couldn't be happening. It wasn't real. It was simply a new scene in the movie. He looked up at Hugo with a very faint hope in his eyes. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I'm sure."

The two cousins sat in silence for what seemed an unbearable amount of time to Hugo. Finally, not knowing what else to do, Hugo stood up and took off his cloak. "Al, I'm going to go into the kitchen and fix you something to eat. Is that ok?" As Al made no movement whatsoever, Hugo continued on into the kitchen. He opened the window to the cold night air and took out his wand. On the seventeenth try to come up with a happy thought he finally was able to conjure a Patronus to contact Lily and HR.

Gin Boyd sat in the living room of Grimmauld Place with her brother and sister-in-law, holding her nephew Arthur. The family had determined that Al needed at least one member of his family with him, as nobody wanted to see him rattling around Grimmauld by himself, and Gin had volunteered when Lily suggested that they spend the day over at Grimmauld. It had been a week since Erin's funeral in Ireland, and Al had returned to Grimmauld Place as a shell of his former self. The Daily Prophet had splashed the news all over their front page, and some of the movie magazines were doing some very distasteful articles, asking if the hospital was a target due to the fact that The Boy Who Lived's daughter-in-law was working there. One magazine even began running a series on who Al should start dating next or which starlet was the most likely to comfort Al in his grief. Gin watched as Arthur pulled a magazine off of the end table and began pulling it apart.

"Gin, don't let him do that." HR looked over at his sister and shook his head.

"It's Celebrity Wizard Weekly."

"Oh. In that case just don't let him eat it." HR took off his glasses and sat back in the chair. "Lils, has he even been downstairs today?"

"No." Lily looked at her watch. "HR, you should really get back to the shop."

"If anybody needs a wand that badly they can owl me." HR noticed his wife's scowl. "If you're here, I'm here. He's my brother too, you know."

As the moistened pieces of Celebrity Wizard Weekly fell to the ground, Gin looked at Lily and HR. "Why don't you two knock off, I'll watch Artie. Besides, the twins and Rosie are supposed to be here soon. I'll bring him home in a few hours."

The sound of the Floo from the other room prevented Lily from responding, and after knowing that Gin would not be on her own with Arthur, Lily consented. Gin could hear Al's status, or lack thereof communicated to the newcomers near the Floo fireplace, and soon HR and Lily left.

"Where's Mione?" Gin looked at her little sister, who just shrugged.

"Said she had to finish a letter. Honestly, I don't know what's got into her lately. She won't even tell me who she's writing and Rosie is no help whatsoever." Minnie rolled her eyes in Rose's direction. "Some gift."

"Hey, it's not all that it's cracked up to be, that's for sure." Rose stopped in front of Gin and held out her hands towards Arthur, who lifted up his chubby little hands that were full of wet paper towards her. "Is he supposed to have that?"

"It's Celebrity Wizard Weekly." Gin lifted Arthur towards Rose. "HR didn't care as long as he doesn't eat it." Gin noticed that it wasn't just Rosie and Minnie at Grimmauld. "Paige! When did you get here?"

Paige Boyd smiled at her cousin. "This morning. Mom and Dad have been at Colony House and you didn't answer your phone."

"I knew I forgot something this morning. Sorry, must have left it at home. I'm sure Mum is thrilled it keeps going off."

Al heard the voices downstairs and debated on whether or not to actually go to the kitchen. He knew he'd be smothered in quiet tones and everyone would have "that look," the one that he'd grown accustomed to seeing every time he had to talk to anyone, the look that said that there was nothing they could do and that they were available to talk. Instead of going back upstairs, though, Al stood on the landing and took a deep breath. Sod it, he was hungry. He wrapped the bathrobe around him, tied the cord and made no effort to hide his footsteps.

"Hello, Al, care for a cup of tea? Bite to eat?" Rosie stood holding Arthur on her hip while the baby tried to pull her engagement ring off with his chubby fingers. "Granny sent over some stew."

"Sure." Al nodded his head and started walking towards the kitchen. "Who's here?"

"Gin, Minnie and Paige. You remember Paige, don't you?"

"Sorry, no. Hogwarts friend?" Al walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. "Was she in Slytherin with Gin?"

"No, she's the Boyd's cousin. Lives in the UMS. She's a Muggle. I'm sure you've met her before."

"That's nice. What's she doing here? Come to stare at poor Potter like the rest of the world? Want to see if the actor is going off the deep end?"

Rosie switched arms and put Arthur on her other hip. "No, Al. Stop it, she's not like that. She's visiting with her parents. Trust me, she's ok."

"Another one of your wonderful visions? How come you didn't see…"

"Albus, I'm not having this conversation with you again. It doesn't work that way. You know I can't control…"

Al ran his hand over the beard that had begun ever since Hugo's fateful visit. "Fine. I know, I know. Sorry."

Rosie moved towards the pot of stew that sat on the stove, and after taking out her wand she moved it a little too forcefully, causing the pot to tilt and fall onto the floor. "Bloody hell! Al take him while I clean this up!" She thrust Arthur into Al's hands and surveyed the mess. "I'll have to do the whole floor. Merlin's pants!"

Al looked at the bright blue eyes of his nephew. "Come on, little man. I think we should leave the kitchen."

Al sat on his bed while Arthur sat in front of him and played with Erin's brush. As Al watched his nephew take his fingers and move the soft bristles of the brush with his stubby little fingers; Al tried to straighten the slight, unruly mop of red curls on Arthur's head.

"Looks like you've got the Weasley hair, that's for sure. Your Aunt Erin was a redhead, too. I know you don't remember her, but she was there when you were born. Took care of your Dad when he passed out. Don't mention it to him, he gets all defensive about it." Al watched Arthur try to chew on the brush handle, so he took the brush out of Arthur's hands and gave him a biscuit that was on the tray next to the bed. It was from yesterday's tea, but he didn't think it would hurt the boy. "I wish you could have known your Aunt Erin. I've never known anyone like her. She was smart, a lot smarter than I am, and I still wonder why she married me sometimes. Artie, she was beautiful but she never thought so, she thought she was just an ordinary witch. Far from it. I was ready to run away the first time I took her to The Burrow, but at the end of the night she had them eating out of her hand."

Arthur dropped the soggy biscuit on the bed and began trying to pick the dragon off of Al's arm.

"Yeah, she even liked the tattoos. Your Grandmum Potter sure didn't, but Erin somehow got her to get over it. Look, here's a little Celtic knot I got after…well, afterwards. Maybe I'll tell you about that when you get older." Al put Arthur's little fingers on the green Celtic knot that seemed to endlessly go over and over, never stopping, never starting. "She told me I was being sappy, but I know she liked it. We used to have complete conversations without saying more than a few words; we just knew what each other were thinking. We used to read at night, and she was always the last one to turn off the light. Sometimes I'd wake up the next morning and she'd still be reading. Took me forever to get her to stop that."

Arthur began moving, trying to crawl off the bed, so Al picked him up, got off of the bed and walked over to the farthest wall. "See, here she is, the day we got married in Ireland. Watch right here." Al pointed to a spot near the bottom of the picture, and Arthur made excited noises as two Welsh Corgis ran across the bottom of the picture. "The little one's Steve, and the big one is Chub. Kinda like you." Al tickled Arthur, who began laughing, causing Al to chuckle. "Merlin, she loved those dogs. We'd talked about getting one, but with her at St. Mungo's and my schedule, and then the war…"

Al walked over to the window, and instead of the pouring rain that would help soothe him the sky shone bright and clear. He watched a couple push a pram outside on the street, hurrying along as the wind whipped the woman's hair about. "We said that when it was all over we'd do that. Be that annoyingly boring couple that only talks about their kids." Arthur reached up and took a large handful of Al's long hair into his hand, causing Al to wince slightly. After extricating his hand, Al held his nephew out at arm's length. "What am I going to do, Artie? A widower at twenty-two. Damn it."

"Dam. Dam. Dam."

"Oh no, your mum will kill me. Stop saying that." Al pulled his nephew close and laughed, and when he heard another laugh he turned around quickly. A woman about his age stood in the doorway, and suddenly Al felt everything crash in on him again. His tone changed drastically as he asked the woman "How long have you been there?"

"Too long. I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself. I don't know if you remember me, Albus, but…"

Suddenly Al did remember, years ago at Colony House. "Right. Paige." Albus finally put two and two together. "I think you were over at Christmas when…"

"You told your parents you wanted to be an actor. My cousins tell me you're really good at it. I'm so sorry, and I didn't mean to listen. Um, Rosie sent me up here to tell you she's made you something to eat. Want me to take the baby?"

"No. He's fine." Al watched as Paige nodded and began to head downstairs. Before she got a few steps away he called to her. "Um, don't say anything about him saying bad words, will you?"

"Don't worry; you can always blame it on Uncle Hank."

Al laughed slightly. "Very true, very true."

Al sat in the library at Grimmauld. The last few weeks had been better, as he'd finally convinced his family that he didn't need a nanny, and everyone had agreed except for his Gran, who still brought him food every third day or so. Since it was Granny Weasley he couldn't really tell her no, and as always the food was delicious so he hadn't said anything. To be quite honest he found himself looking forward to her visits, as she didn't pry or ask questions; instead she kept him up to date on the rest of his family. Rose's wedding plans were coming along nicely even if his Uncle Ron was grumbling, but everyone knew that it was just an act. As Rosie was his only daughter Uncle Ron spoiled her just as much now that she was out of Hogwarts as he ever had. James was doing well with Puddlemere, and was hoping to be chosen for the All England team for the upcoming Quidditch World Cup although he was grumbling about how much publicity and personal appearances he had to make for the war effort. Artie was talking more and more and Molly was positive that Professor Muggle's bad language was rubbing off on her great-grandson as it seemed that Artie was very fond of saying curse words.

After taking a sip of tea and putting a bookmark in the pages of the book he'd pulled from the library shelves Al looked over at the clock. Usually Granny Weasley was here by this time, and Al felt his stomach rumble slightly. He wasn't looking forward to having to fix his own lunch and had decided to wait a little bit longer when he heard the Floo.

"Gran? Gran, is that you?"

Al heard heavier steps on the floor and saw his Uncle George's head pop around the corner.

"No such luck, just your favorite uncle. Merlin, you look like something that's crawled out from under a rock. Come on, get your arse upstairs, get cleaned up and throw on some clothes. We're going to a Quidditch match."

Al sighed. His family had been trying to get him out of the house for weeks, to no avail. "Thanks, but I don't think…"

"Shut it, you little fart. Come on, it's Hufflepuff versus Gryffindor. I've bet ten Galleons with your godmother and I'm not losing. And if that beard gets any longer people will think you're Hagrid's little brother."

"George, I really don't want…"

Al didn't have time to say the rest of his sentence as George had taken out his wand and levitated Al into the air by one leg. As Al hung upside-down George walked over to him and leaned down.

"At least you don't smell like you've been under a rock, that's a plus. Come on. I gave you a bath when you were little and I don't really want to have to do that again."

Walking with his Uncle George walked down to the Quidditch pitch Al realized that he hadn't stepped foot onto the Hogwarts grounds in over three years, since HR and Lily's last year. The grounds seemed smaller to him than they had when he'd been a student; back then Hogwarts seemed to stretch out forever in all directions, but now it was as if the borders were closing in on him. He pulled the stocking cap down further on his head and leaned into the wind.

"Al, I know you're an actor and like dressing up and all that, but you look ridiculous. At least take off those sunglasses; the sun's not coming out today and…"

"Fine, George, fine."

Al put the sunglasses in the pocket of his jacket and continued on towards the pitch. He wasn't sure if this was a good idea or not, but he was committed at this point. It did feel good to be outside with the wind on his face. Al adjusted the black scarf around his neck, and he was glad that he'd put on that one instead of the Hufflepuff scarf he usually wore to Quidditch matches. As this was his first trip outside of Grimmauld he didn't want to draw attention to himself, instead he wanted nothing more than to blend into the crowd. When they had reached the entrance Al stopped, causing a few students behind him to almost run into him. Their comments didn't really register for Al, he just heard the noise, but he didn't know what to do. If he sat on the Gryffindor side he'd run into his mum, and if he sat on the Hufflepuff side he'd have to endure all of the awkward conversation from his former housemates, students and his godparents. George waved at him and motioned towards the Gryffindor side, and Al watched his uncle head over to the red and gold Gryffindor stands.

While trying to decide what to do Al smelled something delicious in the air and turned around to see Virginia Boyd walking close by with two other Slytherin girls. Virginia held a small brown paper bag in her hands, and it was then that Al made up his mind; after all, Granny Weasley hadn't stopped by as usual and George forgot to get anything to eat.

"Gin?' Al waved at her slightly.

Gin caught his eye and waved back, said something to her friends, and then headed over to Al. "Didn't expect to see you here, but I'm glad you came."

"Thanks. Um, Gin, what's in the sack?" Al nodded towards her paper bag.

"You Potter boys, always thinking with your stomachs. Come on, I'll share."

Al followed Gin to what his godfather called the "we're not cheering for either team thank you" section, and the two of them sat towards the top of the stands, away from everyone. As soon as they had settled in Gin reached into the bag and handed Al a warm sandwich, and Al wasted no time in polishing it off.

"Thanks, Gin. Kind of missed lunch today."

"No problem whatsoever." Gin smiled weakly at him and then reached in for her own sandwich.

Al sat there and sort of watched Gin eat her sandwich, and everything seemed so unreal. People were attending a Hogwarts Quidditch match, Gin was eating a sandwich, the teams were doing their warmup laps and here he was sitting with them while everything in his life had seemed to fall away. Erin was gone, never coming back, and he was supposed to just pick up the pieces and move on with everything. It seemed as if the world was mocking him with its normality, when his life was now so unreal. Suddenly a sandwich appeared in front of his face.

"Sorry, Al, but you didn't hear me. Want the last one?" Gin

Al shook his head and stared out towards the pitch, concentrating on nothing. When he felt something warm in his hand he looked down to see the sandwich.

"I've never know you, your brother or Hugo to turn down food." Gin looked at him sympathetically. "Nobody expects you to be like you were…before. You do have to eat, though. One sandwich? Really?"

Despite his feelings Al's stomach gave him away, as it rumbled, causing both him and Gin to chuckle. "Thanks." After quickly eating the sandwich he looked over to Gin. "So what now?"

"Well you've cleaned me out. Neeker didn't expect she'd be feeding you." Gin glanced over and then watched the Quidditch teams stream by. "I might be able to…"

"That's not what I mean, Gin." Al looked at her and then quickly resumed his gaze towards the pitch.

"I know, Al." Gin put her hand on Al's arm. "To be honest I have no idea. I've never really had a steady boyfriend, let alone married, so don't know. Dad says that you just keep on living. He's worried about you, you know."

"I know. It's just so hard. Imagine the best thing in your life, and then suddenly it's gone. Think what would happen if you couldn't paint anymore, Gin. It's like that but a hundred times worse."

Gin didn't say anything, so Al continued to stare at the pitch. He flinched involuntarily when he felt Gin put her hand in his, but it felt reassuring.

"Al, you're like a brother to me, so I'm going to tell you what I would tell HR. Do you think Erin would want you to be like this? What would she think? And what would you want for her if the roles were reversed?"

When Al woke up the next morning he was groggy; he'd spent most of the night sitting in the library looking over photo albums of him and Erin, thinking on Gin's comment. What would Erin want him to do? Obviously she would chastise him as she'd done when he'd fallen into a funk after not getting a role, as he'd done several times before. What had she said, something along the lines of "pick yourself up and get going, you're not going anywhere if you act like that."

After making his way downstairs for a cup of tea Al noticed several owls sitting outside the kitchen window. He opened the window and all of them flapped noisily onto the kitchen table, and after removing the letters and a magazine he took the bundle and threw it on the stack of mail that sat on the counter. He knew he should probably read what had come in, along with the rest of the giant pile of correspondence but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. After the kettle sang its song Al added the water, waited for the tea to steep and while waiting he happened to glance over to the correspondence to see his face underneath a letter. After hastily moving the mail he realized that he was on the cover of Celebrity Wizard Weekly, but it wasn't just him. There he was at the Hogwarts Quidditch pitch, sitting next to Virginia Boyd and she had her hand in his. The headline read "Schoolgirl Comforts Grieving Actor."

Before he could open the magazine he heard the Floo from the other room. "Al, hey Al, you there?"

Al walked into the living room and saw the green-flamed head of Hugo Weasley looking at him. "Yeah, I'm here. What are you doing here? Thought you'd be deployed somewhere."

"Rotation. Three months back here, but what are you playing at?"

"What are you talking about, Hugo?" Al sat down in a chair and scooted it closer to the fireplace. "I don't…"

"Are you messing with Gin?" Hugo's tone wasn't very warm. "Why…"

"Merlin, Hugo. Saw Celebrity Wizard Weekly, did you? Believe everything you read?"

"See, you mean? I saw the picture of the two of you."

"What the fuck are you talking about? She was talking to me about Erin. Remember her, my dead wife?"

"Dammit that's not, ok I'm coming over." The green fire ceased suddenly and Hugo's head disappeared.

Al stood up quickly and walked into the kitchen, where the copy of Celebrity Wizard Weekly lay on the table. He took in the front photo again and then flipped to the article. The writer was not one of his favorites, and Al shook his head as he realized the entire article was about how Virginia Boyd, seventh year student at Hogwarts and the oldest daughter of his godparents was the woman who was healing Al's broken heart. Al threw the magazine in the bin and walked upstairs.

Al was almost down the stairs after retrieving his wand when he heard the Floo, and his cousin Hugo stood in the living room, rapidly brushing Floo powder off of his uniform. Al held up his hand to stop Hugo from saying anything and motioned with his wand towards the kitchen. As they entered the kitchen Al walked over to the bin, pointed his wand at the magazine and set it on fire.

"Merlin's pants, Al, you'll set the house on fire." Hugo shook his head and looked at Al strangely.

"Not likely." Al cast auguamenti and doused the fire. He looked at Hugo. "What's your problem?"

"Don't want you messing Gin around, that's what." Hugo stood across the table from Al, still wearing his cloak.

"What's it to you?"

Hugo's face changed from the stereotypical angry Weasley red and began to regain its usual tone. "Sorry, it's just…you got anything to eat?"

After Hugo had taken off his cloak the two cousins began cooking a late breakfast. Neither of them said anything regarding the reason Hugo had come over to Grimmauld in a hurry until they were seated and ready to eat. Hugo had just taken a large bite of his omelet when Al pointed his fork at him.

"Why the sudden interest in Gin Boyd?"

Hugo finished chewing quickly and looked over to Al. "It's not sudden, really. We've, um…we've been writing to each other for a while now. At first it was just good to get letters from home, but…she's still at Hogwarts, Al, and I have no idea how long I'll be in, or whether this stupid war will ever end, and…"

Al began laughing, causing Hugo to put down his fork in disgust.

"I'm here telling you this and you start laughing? Dammit, Al…"

"I'm not moving in on your girl, Hugo. Gin's like a little sister, I mean, I spent so much time over there with HR. It's not like that. Damn." Al ran his hand through his hair and sat back in the chair. "Does anybody…"

"No. And we want to keep it that way. Look, I don't have a lot of time before I have to go back. I don't want to screw it up or have you and the bloody press screw it up. You've got to do something."

"Me? What do you want me to do?"

"Give them an interview. You haven't done one since…" Hugo looked down at his plate.

Al sighed. "You didn't finish. Since Erin died. I know." He looked over at his cousin. "Maybe it's time. Time for the interview and everything else."

"Just the interview would be great, Al. Don't do anything else if you don't want to."

Al shook his head. "That's the thing, Hugo. If I didn't do anything that I didn't want to I'd be here for the rest of my life. Gin was right, it isn't what Erin would want. I just don't know how to start."

Hugo sat there for a while, and then took a sip of tea. "Al, in two weeks it's a Hogsmeade weekend. Gin and me are going to the WeasleyVision theatre, we're taking Paige because she's never seen one. Why don't you go with us? It's not a date, it's just Paige, but it might do you good. You could use your movie makeup or whatever and make it so nobody even realizes its you."

Al looked over to the still slightly smoldering rubbish bin. "Ok, Hugo. Ok."