"Carpe diem! Rejoice while you are alive; enjoy the day; live life to the fullest; make the most of what you have. It is later than you think." ~Horace

Finn's first appointment is set for 11 a.m. tuesday morning. It's 10:32 and he's sitting on the front porch steps waiting for his mom when his phone buzzes in his pocket. He pulls it out and flips it open to find a message from Rachel.

hey. sory i kind of freakd out the othr day. i get crzy about glee.

Finn smirks at this and hits reply. Yea, i noticd.

He sets the phone down beside him on the warped, wooden step. He'd taken the first antibiotic last night, although he can't tell any difference now. His chest still feels tight and itchy, like the terrible beginnings of a harsh cold. He's actually excited to go for the first blood transfusion today. The doctor had said it would help with the symptoms and no dizziness plus being able to make it six hours without crashing on the couch sounds pretty great.

The sun is warm this morning. Despite the general lameness of Lima, Finn kind of thinks Ohio can be a really beautiful place, especially in the summer time.

The phone buzzes again. Finn picks it up.

Are u mad?

No. i get it.

i miss u

He smiles at this, realizing it's been three entire days, which is the longest stretch he's gone without seeing Rachel since winter break.

I miss u 2

Hey, whatre u doing 2day? we should go 2 the zoo! ...or something?

i cant

work? :(

no...

Finn stops and holds the phone in his hands. He takes a deep breath and bows his head until his vision clears again. He doesn't want to tell Rachel about this. He really doesn't want to tell anyone. He really, really doesn't want it to be happening at all.

Rach, i dont thnk this is wrking. its better when were just friends.

He hits send before he can lose his nerve and then bows his head and prays please by my friend, please be my friend.

Carol comes out the front door and closes it behind her with a solid thump. "Ready to go, babe?"

"Not really." Finn pulls himself up slowly and still sways for a minute once he's standing straight.

"Come on." With a hand on his back and at his elbow, Carol guides him to the car.

It's late afternoon by the time they get back. Finn falls onto the couch in a barely controlled flop. They'd been at the hospital a total of seven hours. The transfusion itself was a fairly boring event. However, the blood tests that had to be done before combined with waiting times and a few tests afterward to ensure he wasn't going to have any major reactions to the donor blood meant a lot of quality time at the hospital. He'd developed a slow-growing fever over the course of the transfusion, but the doctors had assured it was a mild reaction and should clear within the day. Finn had left the hospital with five new medications, in addition to the antibiotics he'd already gotten yesterday. The pills are all different colors and shapes. The antibiotic is the only one whose purpose he is sure of.

Finn had thought that the new blood would make him feel as good as new, but it's actually made him feel a bit worse. All the medications make him feel muddled and more confused than ever and its starting to seem like his mom is afraid of him. She tiptoes around the house and plasters on a smile that he can tell is fake from a mile away.

Plus, Rachel never replied to his text. Please, be my friend, he thinks and closes his eyes.

He burrows into the pile of blankets and pillows and soon, is asleep.

"Well, Finn, congratulations. I'm thoroughly disgusted by you."

Finn opens his eyes and realizes several things at once. He doesn't feel cold and hot anymore, no more fever. But, the dizziness is worse than ever. He has curled into an impossible pretzel in his sleep, sheet somehow pulled tight around his chest. His head is tipped back over the arm of the couch. A single, fat line of drool has worked its way out of the corner of his mouth, down his jaw, and onto the thin skin of his throat.

Kurt is sitting in the armchair across from the couch.

Finn sits up and swipes at the drool with the corner of the sheet. "Hey...hey, Kurt."

"Hello, Finn."

"What are you doing here?"

Kurt crosses his legs and smooths the wrinkles out of his skinny, charcoal gray trousers. "Despite my misgivings and my father's rude awakening to your true nature, it seems that love truly does conquer all. Your mom and my dad are still happy as clams together."

"Oh." Finn scratches at the back of his head. "And you're here?"

"For dinner. Your mom invited us over. Frankly, I think she needed a distraction from your sudden illness. I can tell because she's reverted back to the mom jeans, in a tapered leg, no less. What is wrong with you anyway? My dad didn't tell me much, but it must be serious to warrant that level of fashion failure."

"I don't wanna talk about it." Finn rubs at his eyes and drops his head into his hands.

"Maybe later." Finn can hear the tight smile in Kurt's voice. "Of course, if your I.Q. and social behavior are anything to go by, I'd say you've been a bit off your entire life."

Finn lifts his head and drops his hands between his knees, feels the pinch of too many needle sticks in his right arm. "Are you serious? Are you seriously saying this?"

"You know Finn, if you continue to judge and don't accept people as they are, you may find that others will return the favor."

Aware of his mother and Mr. Hummel just one wall away in the kitchen, Finn attempts to control his volume. "I never judged you."

"There is evidence that proves otherwise."

"I never judged you!" One shout and Finn knows it was too much. He leans back against the couch, chest heaving, and closes his eyes. This is, of course, when there are footsteps marching in from the kitchen.

"What's going on here?"

"Finn?"

Finn opens his eyes to see Mr. Hummel standing with a hand on the back of Kurt's chair and his mother leaning over him, reaching to feel his forehead. He brushes her hand away. "I'm fine. It's fine. Sorry." He risks a glance up at Mr. Hummel.

Somehow, the man manages to look both very scary and very concerned at the same time.

"Finn and I were just discussing some song choices for glee." Kurt laughs nervously. "We get a little too passionate about music sometimes."

"That's it?" Burt looks doubtful.

"Of course it is." Carol smiles at her son. "Are you feeling better?"

Finn nods minutely, aware of the attentions of Kurt and Mr. Hummel.

"I think your fever's down and your color is a lot better, too." There's relief in her face for the first time in days. "Let's go eat. Are you guys hungry?"

"Of course." Kurt stands and moves around the chair by his dad.

"Come on." Carol pats her son's leg and stands as well.

Finn hesitates. For the first time since he became ill, and he really can't even say when that was, (five months ago before the Vitamin D incident or yesterday?) Finn is self-conscious about his appearance. He already feels dizzy, already feels that he is about as white as a sheet, and knows as soon as he stands it will only get worse. He doesn't want to show weakness in front of these people, doesn't want to show it in front of anyone.

"Uh...Mom? I'll be right there, okay?"

She's smiling at Burt and when she turns to Finn, her grin is still half-there. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Go ahead."

With one more doubtful look, Carol, Burt, and Kurt file toward the kitchen. Finn waits until he's certain they're gone to shuffle himself forward and, with the help of the couch, pull himself to his feet. The world dims for a moment. Finn closes his eyes and sways.

The hand at his back makes him jump. "Sit down, Finn."

"Kurt. Hey. What are you doing?"

"Sit."

Finn sits. Kurt circles the couch to sit beside him. For a long moment, Kurt just watches him, one hand still on his back. Then, Carol and Burt are coming into the living room, each carrying two full plates.

"I asked your Mom if we could eat in here." Kurt smiles. "I think we'll all be much more comfortable this way."

Finn accepts his plate from Mr. Hummel, confused by Kurt's mood swings. Then again, Finn is pretty much confused most of the time, so he lets it slide.

"Carol was telling me that you have to go back to the hospital tomorrow," Burt says.

"Yeah." Finn nods.

"Maybe I'll make dinner for us then. You guys can come over to our place when you finish up there." Burt looks very steadily at Finn while he speaks.

Finn knows an olive branch when he sees one (not literally, of course) but he does know that the man is once again trying to open his house to him.

"How nice," Carol coos. "Won't that be nice, Finn?"

Finn nods. "Yeah. Yes. Thank you."

No matter what Kurt is laughing at, he always manages to sound at least a little bit nervous, like he isn't sure anyone else will find it funny. "Before you know it, we'll all be co-habitating again."

Mr. Hummel makes an odd hmm-huh noise that Finn can't even pretend to understand.

On the table beside him, his cell phone buzzes. He picks it up to find three new messages. When he opens it though, it turns out to be just one very long message from Rachel.

Finn, u r proof that i do not understnd the male species. ur actions confuse and, i wll not lie, hurt me. i thought we were startng somethng great, but i guess i was wrng. i have been offrd a role in an OH high school drama super star group perfrmance of Grease at Playhouse Sqr in Cleveland. Ill be gone for a month and a half. i hope this will give us both time to think, however i would like to stay in touch. i realize that i should have just called to tell u all of this, but i dnt thnk i could stand to hear your voice rite now. i still care about u. c u soon. -Rachel

Finn closes the phone and sets it on the table next to his forgotten plate.