Hey! I'm Back! Sorry I haven't updated in a while. But I'm here now. I got to see my family at the family reunion and I got my braces put in.
Again, I'm sorry I haven't updated. Enjoy the story!
He's such an idiot!
A complete moron.
I can't believe him! He picked them over me. Now I'm here in a bucket of tears feeling sorry for myself.
Chad deserved to be broken up with. After all, if any guy would even think of putting some crazy fan girls above his girlfriend, he obviously had it coming.
I gently wiped away the tears that continued to fall with a tissue before tossing it to the side, joining the pile with the others.
"Why did I p-pick him?" I questioned myself, sniffing. "Him and his stupid hair and fans and sparkly blue eyes..." I trailed off. I could've sworn that he had changed, I thought we would never fall apart.
Just another thing that I was wrong about it.
I snatched the picture of him, hanging in the corner of the mirror on my vanity and threw it. " I hate you!" I screamed. of course it didn't go far, but as far as picture throwing goes two inches is a record breaker.
Right from the start, I should've known. Chad had his ego and there was no room for a girlfriend in that mix.
I buried my face in my hands and began to sob.
"Sonny?" Called a voice. "You okay?" asked my castmate, Tawni Hart.
I lifted my head up, grabbed another tissue and wiped my tears. "Yeah, I'm fine, Tawn." I lied. "Don't worry about me."
The old Tawni wouldn't have thought twice. She'd leave me to myself and adore her reflection in the mirror. But lately she had been working on the whole caring thing and suprisingly had gotten better.
She moved from her place in the doorway and approached me. " I know you. And the Sonny I know would be smiling from ear to ear right about now. Being her usual sunny self." I smiled.
I sighed. You know it's bad when Tawni notices something amiss. Was it really that obvious? "You're right, Tawni. I'm not okay."
She grinned, happy to get a confession out of me. "Awww, what's wrong?"
"I broke up with Chad." I admitted.
"So...?" I could tell Tawni wasn't seeing the bad side in this because i broke up with him and not vice versa.
"I still lo-like him." I said not wanting to say love I was so unsure about my feelings for him. He hadn't said it so why should I?
She put her hand on my shoulder, comfortingly. "Aw, Sonny. If you still like him why'd you end it with him?"
I told Tawni the whole story, letting a few sobs escape my lips every now and then. "Awww. Sonny!" she gushed, flinging her arms around me and giving me a hug. "You know, from what I'm hearing it wasn't entirely Chad's fault." I went to protest but she cut me off. "You were being a little bit unreasonable."
Again I went to protest but then Tawni's words finally hit me. "I only want the best for him."
She sighs, exasperated. "And what is the best for him, Sonny?" She questions.
I think hard, but I can only come up with answer. Its not good one but its an answer. "I don't know... me, maybe?" I say but it comes out more as a question. Very uncertain.
Even though its the only answer I have, I know its not the right one. I just haven't figured out what is right yet.
"And if you're not?"
Good question, bad reply. "Then.. I.. he-" I didn't have to compose a correct sentence for Tawni to get what I wanted to say.
He's stuck, I'm stuck. We're done. Simple as that.
"Tawn, you don't get it. Chad's gotten to many second chances and I'm done, I'm finished." It's hard to fix a relationship when you're the only one trying. "Believe me, I wanted our relationship to work out, but-"
"You just end up getting hurt in the process." She cuts me off, finishing for me.
"Exactly." I confirm. "It hurts real bad. But I have to move on."
She nodded her head in understanding. "So no more Taylor Swift songs?"
"Nope."
"Watching The Notebook on a continuous loop?"
"Nah ah."
"Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream?" She ask.
I cracked a smile. "Now I don't know about that."
Tawni started to giggle and soon we were laughing together. It died after a few seconds. Afterwards, I was smiling like a big goofball. "You know, Tawni, that's the first time I've laughed all day." I admitted, letting some giggles escape my lips.
"That's good. First step to moving on is having fun."
The atmosphere unexpectedly turned serious again. "Breaking up with him seemed wrong, Sonny." I knew it was wrong, but I wasn't going to admit it. "Look, for all I know Chad could be having the time of his life with his snobby castmates and crazy fan girls." I said, not agreeing or disagreeing with her statement.
She sighs, fixing her hair. "You know that's not true, Sonny. Chad loves you."
"Yeah, well he never said it."
"Scoot over." She demands, pushing me lightly so there's room for her to sit on the soft chair. "Well, between breakup after breakup there is not that much room to say I love you."
I lazily lay my head on her shoulder. "He claims he'll fix whatevers wrong, but there's only one thing broken."
"And what is that?" She questions.
I bring my head back up. "My heart."
She suddenly stands up pulling me with her. "Chad might not fix hearts, but do you know what does?" I go to reply but she keeps talking. "Frozen yogurt!" She drags me to the door not realizing that my feet are resisting. "Come on!"
I rest my hands on her shoulders. "No, thanks. I'm not in the fro-yo mood." I tell her. "But I appreciate the offer."
"Fine, you stay. But I have a strawberry fro-yo with rainbow sprinkles that's calling my name." With that, Tawni left our dressing room and went to the cafeteria.
Finally alone, I start to contemplate Tawni's words. Maybe she's right. Maybe I did over-react and maybe I was a bit unreasonable.
Maybe I'm the idiot, the complete moron.
I shake my head and walk over to the photo booth and push it away. Behind it revealed the bright red piano that I hadn't used since the Trey brothers incident.
I pull the rope on the leg and bring it to the center of the room. Pulling out the piano bench I sit down and let my fingers slide across the keys. Not playing just feeling.
I stand back up again to grab my song pillow, taking out a song that I recently had written. I sat back down and straightened out the papers.
Playing the first note, I read the title. "Fix A Heart." I started writing the song just yesterday after the break up. It wasn't finished quite yet, I still needed a closing line. Hopefully it would come to me while I was playing the rest of the song.
My fingers glided up and down the keys, making a harmonious melody. After playing the intro i began to sing.
It's probably what's best for you
I only want the best for you
And if I'm not the best, then you're stuck
I try to sever ties and I,
Ended up with wounds to bind
Like you're pouring salt in my cuts
And I just ran out of band-aids
I don't even know where to start
'Cause you can't bandage the damage,
You never really can fix a heart
Even though I know what's wrong,
How can I be so sure
If you never say what you feel, feel?
I must have held your hand so tight,
You didn't have the will to fight
I guess you needed more time to heal
Baby I just ran out of band-aids
I don't even know where to start
'Cause you can't bandage the damage
You never really can fix a heart
You must be a miracle worker,
Swearin' up and down,
You can't fix what's been broken, yeah
Please don't get my hopes up, no no
Baby, tell me how could you
Be so cruel?
It's like you're pouring salt on my cuts
Baby, I just ran out of band-aids
I don't even know where to start
'Cause you can't bandage the damage
You never really can fix a heart
Baby, I just ran out of band-aids
I don't even know where to start
'Cause you can't bandage the damage
You never really can fix a heart
Oh no no no no
You never really can fix a heart
Oh no no no no
You never really can fix heart
Right before I close the song the last sentence that I hoped would come, came.
You never really can fix my heart
I wiped away the tears that had formed while I was playing
But that's when the clapping came.
I froze in my spot to see the person that was the cause of all this pain.
"Chad?"
Ooohhh! What happens next? You'll have to read and see.
The chapter after next is the last. I know so sad.
I really hope you liked this chapter.
Review Please.
~Diamond