I never did think being a country would be hard. That and living without Antonio and sharing the same house as my dimwitted twin brother. I have to say though, it was a little cool. Being a country, I mean. Yes there was a lot of work, but it always paid off in the end. There were also times I hated being a country, and times where it was just plain boring. Mine and Feliciano's first world conference is coming up, and this will be the first time people would see us together as the country of Italy. And it will be the first time I've seen Antonio in two years.

Yes, I said two years in case you didn't quite catch that. I'm eighteen now, and proud of it. But anyway, I don't really know what to expect when I see him again. There have been a few letters and phone calls exchanged between us, but we never met in person. He mostly just talked about how much he misses me and what not. I missed him too, but I wasn't going to say that. I also missed having him next to me as I slept, so it was weird sleeping alone.

"Ve...say big brother? What do you think of Germany?" Oh yeah, then there's that. Feliciano has been hanging with that damn potato bastard. I don't really trust him, and I think he's brainwashing Feli. To be honest, even a bigger idiota than Feli could fucking brainwash him. So, maybe I shouldn't be so worried.

"I don't like him." And that's how simple my answer turned out to be. I could tell you how Feliciano didn't react, but I'm not big on lying. So he just got really sad, and cried, and told me I should get to know that fucking potato bastard better before I go saying stuff like that. Then he told me that his "Luddy" makes him happy. And who am I to be mad at my brother if he's happy and I'm not? Oh wait. I was kind of mad. I don't exactly have anyone that makes me happy.

Which was a lie. I did have someone. I had Antonio, but I….well I don't know. I did have him, yes, but he was in Spain. Most of the time, Germany was here, or Feliciano was there. I hardly saw my brother since he got to know Germany. And I guess I wouldn't see him again until the world conference, because that's just how he is.

Anyway, the world conference is in a couple hours, and it's being held here in Rome. Why they decided that, I have no idea. So I am currently getting ready for that. I wanted to look nice, but not too nice. So I went with jeans, a dress shirt (a white one of course) and some tennis shoes. I grabbed a few tomatoes, got into my car, and headed to the conference hall. At this point, there was about twenty minutes until it actually started.

Nothing interesting happened at the conference. But after Feliciano told me he was going to move into Germany's house for a while, and asked if I would be okay alone. I told him yes, but that was a lie. I just didn't want to see him sad. Most people think I really hate Feliciano for being better than me, when I actually envy him, and want to be a little more like him. I told Antonio that once, and he said he didn't want me any other way than just the way I once, bitchy attitude and all. So I decided to stay the way I was after that, because I have a weak spot for Antonio.

I was walking out to my car after the conference, and I actually felt bad, because Antonio never came to say hi or anything. I was actually wondering if he was mad at me for leaving him. I wouldn't be surprised if he was. I'd be mad at me too. But I also felt guilty, and empty, and lonely without him. I seriously was starting to question my sexuality. I've had a few dates since I left Antonio, but with me being a country, I had to leave before I got attached. The whole 'don't get close to humans because they die and you don't' sort of thing.

When I got to my car, I got in and started it and buckled up, and I checked my rear view mirror, and then I absentmindedly shut the car off and turned around in the seat. I couldn't believe my eyes. I just couldn't. Here I thought he had left already, but no. He was sitting in the back of my fucking car. He was sitting right there. I rubbed my eyes, and looked again, and he was still sitting there. "Hello Lovino," he said to me. I missed hearing my name roll off his tongue like that, in that accent, oh my god, I need to calm myself.

"H-hi," I said back, my eyes filling with water. Fucking traders.

"Can I hug you Lovi?" he asked, actually crying a few tears. All I could do was nod and crawl my way into the back of my car, so he could wrap his arms around me and hold me tight and close. The minute I was sitting next to him, his arms wrapped around me and he started crying a little harder. I couldn't help but cry a little too. I snaked my arms up between us, and I grabbed the front of his shirt and just cried like a sissy. But it was okay, because the only person who could see was Antonio, who was also crying like a sissy. Guess I missed him a little more than I thought.

After our really long and wet hug, we pulled apart and Antonio looked at me and smiled. God, how I missed that smile. "So, I have a question Lovino," Antonio suddenly said. I looked up at him and smiled slightly.

"Alright," I said after that.

"Can I come stay for a couple days?" he asked nudging my shoulder with his.

"Umm...sure. I'll be alone in my house again anyway," I said.

"Alone? Alone again?" Antonio asked looking at me with a worried expression.

"Feliciano's been getting close to Germany. He went to his house a few times, and was gone for like a week at a time. This time, I'm not sure when he'll be back," I said laughing to myself.

"Sounds...lonely," Antonio said leaning against me.

"It is," I said shoving him off and getting out of the car. I got back into the front seat, and then I turned back to Antonio. "Go get your stuff dammit!" I snapped at him, bringing him out of his thoughts.

"Right!" he said as he stumbled out of the car. He came back quicker than I thought he would and shoved everything into the back of the car. He then got in next to me, buckled up, and then turned to me and nodded. I started the car, and headed for my house. When we arrived, I helped Antonio grab his stuff, and then I went and unlocked the door, and led Antonio to my bedroom.

"So..uh...yeah. Make yourself at home I guess. Supper will be ready in an hour," I said walking of the room. I made my way to the kitchen and started getting stuff ready to make pizza, only because it's better fresh. Antonio came in not too much longer after I did and came over to watch me.

"I didn't know you could cook," Antonio said, now watching me with a hint of admiration in his eyes.

"Yes you did...stupid bastard," I mumbled the last part to myself. I used to cook for him all the time.

"No, I didn't know you could cook pizza and stuff like that. I know you had some history with cooking," Antonio said coming closer to where I was working.

"Don't you have anything better you could be doing?" I asked looking over my shoulder with a glare.

"Nope!" Antonio stated, a little...no very cheerfully. I groaned, but went back to what I was doing. After a while, Antonio set his gaze on my face. I tried to ignore it, but with him staring at me like that, I just couldn't work. I managed to get the pizza done and in the oven. I then turned at looked at Antonio, and he just smiled at me.

"It's hard to do this stuff with you watching me so intensely like that," I said taking a step closer to Antonio. I spotted the bowl I made the sauce in, and the spoon was positioned just right.

"You saw that did you?" he said, softly chuckling to himself.

"Yes, I did," I said looking at him. He reached out and grabbed my apron and pulled me to him. "Hey! What are you doing dammit?!" I asked, my face red with a mix of shock and embarrassment.

"Oh, nothing," he said coming closer to my face. I decided now was a good time to grab that spoon. So I did. I then wiped it across Antonio's face, making him let go of me, and I couldn't help but laugh. Antonio heard that, and he froze, and then he smiled. It really has been a while since he's heard me laugh. "So, you wanna play that way, huh?" he asked taking a step toward me. He reached his hand in the bowl, and then caressed my cheek with that hand. He smiled at me, and then laughed.

I looked around and saw the flour, and then I grabbed some and threw it into his face. He opened his eyes and smiled, then secretly grabbed flour and threw it at me as well. But me being as smart as I am, I dodged it and threw more sauce in his face. After that, we were throwing different foods and spices at each other, and soon we were laying on the floor breathing heavily. "We should really get cleaned up before the pizza is done," I said turning to face Antonio.

"Yeah, probably." But of course, he made no movements to get up and do anything, so I left him there and went to take a shower. Once I was done, I went into my bedroom and Antonio was sitting there in his boxers. I immediately flushed, just because that's how I work. And he noticed me, and I turned to the other side of the room, my scarred back facing him. He shuffled over to me. "Why is it you always turn away? Why show me your back, when you know how much it pains me to see it?" Antonio asked hugging me from behind.

"Natural reaction," I whispered, not knowing if he heard me or not.

"Pero de nuevo, porque te amo, tenga usted querido, tengo que aprender a amar todo sobre este frágil cuerpo de los suyos," Antonio said, then walked into the bathroom so he could shower. I got dressed and went down to take the pizza out of the oven, since I could smell it, and man, did it ever smell delicious! Anyway, I went to the kitchen and then I took the pizza out of the oven and set it on the counter. I made sure the dough was cooked, and then I cut it and took it over to the table. I grabbed two wine glasses, and then I went to the cellar to pick out a good bottle of wine. I heard Antonio as he entered the kitchen (the cellar door was like, five feet away from the kitchen door) and he called my name.

"I'm in the cellar. I'll be right up," I said finally deciding on a good, red wine to drink with the pizza. As soon as I came back up, I opened the wine and poured some in each glass, then set the bottle aside. "Well, I hope you enjoy this lovely meal," I said looking at Antonio as I took a drink of wine.

"Lovi, you're only eighteen. You shouldn't be drinking," Antonio said looking at me seriously.

"You're in Italy. The drinking age here is anywhere from sixteen to eighteen, depending where you are in the country. Here in Rome, it's perfectly legal for me to be drinking," I said setting my glass down and looking over at Antonio.

"Oh," he said looking down and grabbing a piece of the epicness on the table. I watched as he brought it to his mouth and took a bite. His face changed from 'concerned-father-teaching-son-proper-things-about-life' to 'omg-I-think-I-just-had-a-flavor-orgasm-thingy-majigger-in-my-mouth' so I could tell he really liked it. I smiled to myself, and grabbed a piece for me.

After going through the pizza and a bottle of wine, I told Antonio I was going to go change and head to my pool in the backyard. He, of course, said he would join me. So we spent a good hour or so swimming, and somehow managed to end up in a bath together. Yes. I somehow let Antonio talk me into bathing with him. So here we were, naked as naked can get, sitting across from each other in a bubble bath. What's next? A frolic through a meadow wearing dresses and spewing glitter everywhere?

Umm...anyway...before I get too lost in thought, I looked over to see what Antonio was up to. He was looking at me. HE WAS FUCKING LOOKING AT ME WITH A FUNNY LOOK. WHAT THE HELL. "W-what is it?" I asked him. I can only take so much of that look…

"Come here Lovino," he whispered. I scooted a little closer to him, and he told me to turn around so he could see my back. I did, because I really don't want to make him any more upset than he is already. I heard him take a few deep breaths, and then his hands grabbed my sides.

"Mi dispiace non sono mai stato un buon figlio...o qualsiasi altra cosa ero. Sono innamorato di te. Non posso davvero dirvi questo...ma forse qualche volta sarò in grado di dirlo," I whispered, even though I knew if he heard, he still wouldn't understand. I looked behind my shoulder at him and he was crying. He cried everytime he looked at my scarred back. I turned again and wiped the tears from his cheeks. He smiled a weak smile at me, and I couldn't help but wrap my arms around him, and let him cry for a while.

"I need to look again," he said as soon as he had calmed down some. So I let him. He traced my scars with soft touches, and after a few minutes, he kissed my back. I looked back at him, and he looked up at me, and there was something in those eyes that really made me want to kiss him for real. I scanned my Spanish vocabulary quickly, and I managed to find just what I was looking for. I turned around, never breaking the eye contact between us. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted him to kiss me. I wanted Antonio to steal my first real kiss away.

"Bésame," I whispered to him.

"Did you just say something in Spanish Lovi?" he asked, oblivious to what I just said.

"Yes. I said bésame," I said a little louder.

"What?" he asked, his face becoming flushed.

"Bésame," I repeated yet again. This was starting to annoy the hell out of me. I looked up at Antonio, who somehow, without a word, managed to get really close to me. It wasn't long after that, that he answered my request. His mouth covered mine, and I really didn't know what to do. So I stopped thinking and just let my body work it's magic. Soon I found I had my arms wrapped around Antonio's neck, and I was kissing him back. A little later, I felt Antonio's tongue trail across my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth a little wider, just to see what would happen. His tongue entered my mouth, and I really had to say, I didn't hate the feeling at all.

When the kiss ended, Antonio and I were out of breath, and we couldn't do anything but look at each other. "Did that really just happen?" Antonio asked after a little bit. Instead of answering him, I just got out of the tub and grabbed a towel and headed for my room. I dried off and changed, then went to my (hehehe...I have one to Antonio!) balcony. I stood out there, trying to wrap my head around what just happened as well. I asked him to kiss me. He kissed me. I ran. Oh god...I actually ran. I hope he's not too mad at me for that one.

I stood out on the balcony for what seemed to be ten minutes, when Antonio finally came out by me. He stood next to me, and I couldn't bring myself to look up at him. I was just too in shock to do anything at the moment. "Lovino." I heard my name called, in a thick Spanish accent, but I never acknowledged it. I couldn't acknowledge something like that, when all I could think about, was crashing my lips onto Antonio's again.

"Lovino, look at me." Again, I could just hear him talking. I tried moving, but I was frozen in place. Soon after that, I felt him grab my face and turn it to him. "Lovino. Are you alright?" he asked me, noticing my shocked expression, and I saw a bit of what looked like concern in his eyes.

"I-I'm fine," I managed to get out. It was indeed a lie though.

"Don't lie to me," he said, his grip getting a little tighter.

"Mi dispiace," I said, feeling the tears fill my eyes. Not to long after that, I started crying. Like a baby. Antonio wrapped his arms around me, and held me tight.

"Don't be sorry. Not for anything," he whispered into my ear. I felt...happy, I guess is how I can describe it. I felt warm, and comfortable in Antonio's strong, warm arms. I want to kiss him again. I really want to kiss him. I need to kiss him.

"Antonio?" I asked, a little gravely.

"Yes Lovino?" he asked in return.

"W-Will you k-kiss me again?" I asked, looking up at him.

"Ah, how can I say no to that face, hmm?" he said as he leaned closer. "Just promise not to run away this time."

"I promise I won't run away this time," I said quietly. I waited for a little bit, and then Antonio's mouth covered mine once again. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and deepened the kiss. Once again, Antonio trailed his tongue over my bottom lip, and I let him in. This time though, he took the time to tease my tongue. I shivered in delight, and I just knew Antonio felt it. I knew because he chuckled slightly. While kissing me still. I guess I don't give him enough credit for whole can't-multitask-worth-shit-because-I'm-stupid thing. I'll have to lighten up a bit. Oh god, I feel light headed. "A-Anto-Antonio, I can't breathe," I hissed out while trying to continue the kiss.

"Ah, lo siento Lovino," Antonio said breaking the kiss. We were both panting heavily, and I looked up at Antonio. I needed a couple answers.

"H-How long? Is that what you were going to tell me two years ago? Before I left?" I asked Antonio, now looking at him.

"Ah, oh right. I remember that night like it was yesterday. The day you left me alone in that house. I don't know exactly what you are referring to, but I think it goes like this. That night, two years ago, was your sixteenth birthday. I was going to tell you something important that I had discovered, and then you told my you were becoming independent. So I didn't think I should tell you anymore. Francis helped me figure this out, and helped me know what it was that I was feeling," Antonio said looking out at the moon and the sky.

"What you were feeling? Something important?" I asked.

"Yes. It was important to me. I was going to tell you the truth Lovino," Antonio said looking at me.

"What truth?" I asked, getting nervous.

"Te amo, Lovino," he whispered, then his arms wrapped around me. I felt my face start to burn up. Antonio...loves me? What should I do now? Should I tell him? I don't think I'm ready to tell him something like that. I needed a bit more time. "Lovino? It's okay if you don't love me. I'm fine with that. Until you though, I didn't know what is was like to love someone. I'm glad I met you Lovi. No past, no scars, and no crazy tempered Italian will make me regret anything I have done, or change the way I feel," Antonio whispered into my ear.

"I need more time. I think I know the answer to what you told me, but I'm a little new at this as well," I said, gripping the front of his shirt so hard I could feel my knuckles turn white.

"Ah, that's quite alright Lovino. Just don't keep me waiting too long," he said, now smiling at me.

"R-Right," I stuttered back to him. So, he loves me. I guess I've been waiting to hear that, and now I have to find the right time and place (and courage) to tell him that I love him too. I just don't know how to say it right now.

"Shall we go inside and get some sleep Lovino?" Antonio asked, taking my hand. He led us over to my bed, and he got in and pulled me beside him. Oh how I missed having this Spaniard next to me when I was getting ready to sleep. His warmth, his smile, the feel of his hand. I wanted to much more of him, and I knew he wanted more of me. But, I think he could wait a while. I decided that just this once, I would give him a little more love on my part.

I scooted closer to Antonio and I wrapped my arms around his torso, causing him to tense. He relaxed after a few seconds, and wrapped his arms around my slightly smaller frame. I felt his heat engulf me, and I enjoyed it. This Spanish bastard was warm. So warm it's not even funny. "Antonio?" I suddenly heard myself call out.

"Yes Lovi?" he asked in return.

"What did you do, you know, after I left you?" I asked, still not sure why I was doing so. Maybe it was because I was secretly worried about the answer he would give me.

"Well, I quit eating for a while, I drank myself silly every night, and when Francis and Gilbert came, and saw how weak and frail I was, they helped me regain myself, and my sanity. I was on the verge of becoming a fucked up lunatic," Antonio said, tightening his grip a little. He swore. He actually swore. He hasn't done that since he was still beating me.

"O-oh. Please don't," I started. "I don't know what I would do with my life if I didn't have you. I'm the only one who knows everything about you. Your past, your scars, the things that anger you, the things that make you sad, the things that make you happy, and I even know some of the ways to pleasure you," I said holding him closer to me, worried that the man in front of me, would somehow just vanish into thin air.

"You know that much, huh?" he stated, "why don't you just show me how much you know then?" he asked moving so I was over him.

"No," I said looking down at his lusty eyes. Oh god. There was a fire in my lower stomach, and I felt something react to that glare.

"Alright. Well, I know all of that about you too Lovino," he said flipping us over so he was over me.

"L-Like what?" I asked him, looking away. He one of his legs, so it brushed against the bulging tent of my pants. 'oh god,' I thought to myself. He knows. Oh how he knows. He looked down, and just kept staring. I wriggled around underneath of him, just to the point where I could almost hide myself. But then Antonio grabbed me, and put me back where I was.

"You know how you never told me about that curl of yours?" he asked suddenly.

"Oh god," I whispered harshly.

"Oh yes Lovino. I know exactly what that does," he said moving his hand up. I smacked it away, and before he could react, I smashed my lips against him. He immediately froze, and then melted into the kiss. Score one, Lovino. Ha! Anyway, it wasn't long until he once again invaded my mouth. After I broke the kiss, I looked up at him.

"That's one thing that pleasures you," I panted to him.

"Yes indeed. But Lovi, it's not good to ignore a erection like that," he said looking down at my tent again. And he was right, of course. Wasn't good at all.

"Oh well," I said turning to face the opposite direction as Antonio's gaze.

"Lovino. Let me take care of that for you," Antonio said. I turned to snap at him, but he just put a hand over my mouth and started pulling my pants down. I looked at his face, and I could tell he too, was just as horny as I was, and he had his own tent going on. I was too deep in thought to register what he was doing, until he licked the head of my dick that is. That sure snapped me back to reality. I looked at what he was doing, and then he shoved all of me into his mouth, and I heard this, moan thingy come from my throat. Antonio moved his hand away from my mouth and he spread my legs further apart, and went on teasing me.

I reached out and wrapped my fingers in strands of his curly brown hair, and he sped us his movements, causing me to moan louder, and somehow lose my ability to breathe normally. I gripped his hair tighter, and pushed down on his head. He became a little faster, and then I felt myself get close to cumming. I had a thin layer of sweat coating my body, and then I came, grunting and moaning loudly as I did. Antonio sucked me dry, and then he let go of me with a pop.

Antonio looked up at me, and then he smiled. I looked back at him, and I couldn't help but...I don't even know what I did. It looked like I reached out to him like I was some sort of little kid. And I giggled. I fucking GIGGLED. That was the weirdest sound that has ever come out of my mouth. Antonio smiled at me, and came to me, even though I just fucking GIGGLED at him, and reached out to him like that. He looked happy, and I didn't want to ruin that. I guess my mind was still fuzzy from what just happened. Then I remembered looking at him and seeing he was hard too. I looked at his crotch again, and he was still very visibly hard. Maybe I should help him out too.

I straddled his lap, and I looked at his face. He looked at me, and looked surprised, but eager at the same time. So I did. I helped him out. I pulled his pants down, and I gave him a blowjob to, and it seemed like he enjoyed it a little too much. Oh well. I wanted him happy. I guess the day I tell him I love him too, was going to come sooner than I had originally thought. But I guess I wasn't worried. Maybe I'll do it now. "Antonio?" I called out.

"Yes Lovino?" he asked rubbing a hand up and down my arm.

"Ti amo," I whispered, looking up at him. He smiled, and his eyes filled with happy tears. He wrapped his arms around my body and kissed my forehead.

"That's good to know," he said smiling at me.

A/N:

Hiya everyone! Don't forget to leave a review! I really hope you guys are liking this story so far. THen again, I wouldn't know unless you reviewed. I can't read mind you know. Although I wish I could. How cool would that be? Anyway, I'm not sure where this is going. I just type whatever comes to mind. Oh well. So, keep on following, favoring, and reviewing! I appreciate it all!

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