Hey there. I wrote this a while ago, but I was too lazy to put it up. I just got around editing it, but I may have done a pretty shoddy job considering I'm watching the vice-presidential debates and I'm too lazy to get a beta.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kakuzu, Hidan, or Naruto in general. I don't even own the vice-presidential debates. I don't own Sarah Palin, or Joe Biden, and I definitely don't own Alaska. Have fun reading it though.

Dust.

Achoo!

They were on a bounty. Again.

This time around it was relatively easy. They were tracking an ex-advisor to a kage that had sold secrets to other villages for profit. He had skipped town like any other sane person in his position, but with a rather hefty sum of money on his head. He wasn't an especially talented ninja, despite his close relationship with his kage, which made him excellent Akatsuki bait. Kakuzu was satisfied by the amount of profit he had garnered from the kill, and Hidan was satisfied by how utterly easy it had been, therefore sparing him a large amount of effort. To put it quite frankly, it was a piece of pie.

Or cake, rather.

They had taken temporary residence in a dingy inn in southern Rice Country, which, apparently, hadn't been cleaned by the owner in about seventy years, going by its current state of cleanliness. But it was the cheapest inn around, and Kakuzu didn't want to part with too much of his bounty so soon, despite Hidan's severe allergy to dust.

Ach-achoo!

Though, he was starting to take that back just a tiny bit.

ACHOO!

"Will you effing quit sneezing for just two seconds so I can count my money in PEACE?!" Kakuzu roared, spinning around in the rickety chair that had been supplied with the room. It wobbled precariously, threatening to snap under the bounty-hunter's weight.

Hidan had taken root on one of the hard bed pallets supplied to them, methodically dusting it off as much as possible. The immortal's eyes watered a little (from the allergy, mind you), and he sneezed once again before rasping, "If you weren't so cheap and you actually paid for a place that fucking cleaned once in a while, I wouldn't be sneezing! So you just brought this upon yourself! Unless you can find a way to miraculously cure my allergy, you're going to have to damn well live with it!"

Kakuzu gave a haggard sigh and counted a few more bills before Hidan sneezed again. He banged his head against the table.

"I don't see how that's helping."

Kakuzu glared at dusty wood. "Screw you, Hidan."

"You would like to, wouldn't you?"

Kakuzu's stitched brow furrowed as he scowled. Blood rushed to his face, and he gritted his teeth, inwardly seething. A vein popped in his temple, and Kakuzu honestly and truly tried not to take the bait, but Hidan's loud and overly obnoxious sniffle gently nudged him over the precipice.

In a fit of rage, Kakuzu ripped off his own black mask, and shoved it over the shorter ninja's head, trying to futilely suffocate the Jashinistic priest. After a few minutes of trying—Hidan struggling wildly in the stitched immortal's grip—he gave up, leaving the black piece of fabric over Hidan's face.

A few minutes of tense silence followed, Kakuzu trying to reign in his temper.

"Hey, 'Kuzu?" Hidan tried after a while. Kakuzu's nose was pressed into the desk.

"What?"

"I can breathe in this thing."

Kakuzu's brow furrowed some more. "Of course you can breathe in it. You wouldn't be conscious if you couldn't."

Hidan fumbled with it for a second, situating it more comfortably over his nose. "I mean, I'm not sneezing. It must filter the dust through or something, because I don't feel like I'm suffocating in here anymore."

"Praise the Lord." His words were laced with sarcasm that was lost upon Hidan.

"Praise Jashin, asshole."

"Whatever." All was silent for a while and Kakuzu was content to simply count his change. After a while a small sneeze exited from the tall immortal, but the stitched man passed it off as nothing and rubbed his nose on the back of his hand. However, these occurences became more and more frequent, and Kakuzu banged his fists against the table, shocking Hidan out of the light doze he had fallen into.

"GOD DAMMIT!"

Hidan leaned on his arm, the mask still placed over his face hiding his cocky smirk from view. "Not so fun, is it?"

Kakuzu sniffled a little, glaring at the priest. "I hate you. I really do."

"I love you too Kuzu, I really do, too."

Kakuzu sneezed. A strange, almost giddy grin slithered its way onto Hidan's face.

"Jashin bless you."