Kevin found the door to Alec's flat unlocked, so he came right on in. The apartment was large and roomy, especially now that there was only one occupant of the room instead of two. The place was a pig sty. Alec was having ample trouble just trying to keep the place running with only him, and with him working for Senator Hoggens nearly all day, he had little time to really decorate much. That was supposed to be Leslie's field. The nursery school at which she worked was open only from 10-4 on Mondays-Fridays. Kevin started looking around for Alec. He wasn't anywhere in the main area.

Crash!

"DAMNIT!"

Kevin jumped. After a minute, he followed the sound of whatever broke into the bedroom, which was behind a wall of square glass bricks. Alec was lying on the bed, tossing a football up in the air. A shattered lamp on his side of the bed was now scattered in fragments on the floor. Lying by Alec's side was a vaguely familiar wad of delicate red lace.

"You're such an asshole, you know that?" Kevin said slowly but calmly. Alec didn't sit up. He just turned his head to face Kevin.

"Haven't you heard of knocking before…I mean in the sense of rapping on the front door and awaiting permission to walk in?" Alec snapped.

"You wouldn't have granted it."

"Damn straight."

Kevin grunted. "Alec, you are being such a baby. You need to learn how to get your head out of your ass and to realize that you aren't the only one with the world against you, alright?"

"How would you know, wise-ass? You were fuckin' ready to start picking out cribs with Leslie when you found out! You don't have a professional reputation to maintain! You just have to send in a couple of dead-people's names and an entry from your goddamn diary to the newspaper and you have bread money for a month! Not to mention, your hypocritical EX girlfriend didn't sleep around with your best friend, resulting in a fatherless illegitimate baby! You don't know shit about how bad it's gotten!"

Kevin frowned. Alec was so uncharacteristically melodramatic sometimes. "I can guarantee I know of one person who has it worse than you," he said softly. Alec groaned.

"If you can, I'll give you a hundred bucks!" he gambled.

"Can I hold you to that?" Kevin said, nearly smirking.

"I'd be insulted if you didn't," Alec replied sarcastically.

"Leslie," answered Kevin, smacking his lips together. Alec finally sat up in bed. His hair was disheveled.

"What?"

"Leslie. Can I have my hundred bucks?"

Alec looked at his feet.

"Alec, you may have to put up with the temporary shame and the possibility of having an unplanned baby in your life. But you don't have to walk around with it written all over your body, for the world to see for nine months. You don't have to scramble to move out of your roommate's place and live with the burden of finding a new place while on maternity leave from your job. You don't have to worry about presenting a crying kid to one potential father while seeing the other one's look of disappointment, all while wondering how the hell you could have prevented all of this. And…you owe me a Ben Franklin!" Kevin smiled. Alec gave Kevin an evil eye and got up to scavenge for his wallet. Alec was silent.

Kevin wandered over to the bed while Alec went out to the kitchen where his overcoat was. He picked up the lace nightgown Alec had next to him. Kevin cringed. Why was he hoarding Leslie's lingerie next to his bed? Especially at a time like this?

Kevin quickly hurled the raunchy slip aside as Alec stomped like an ogre back into the bedroom and hurled a crumpled 100-dollar bill at Kevin's nose. Kevin snatched it before it could hit him and pocketed the bill. "So you admit I'm right?"

"No, jagoff, I gave you that because I liked your face!" Alec said, suddenly noticing that Kevin had moved the nightgown aside. Alec quickly snatched it up and shoved it in the dresser. "Don't you dare say a word to Les!"

"About what? The fact that you're holding her underwear hostage in your bedroom?" Kevin asked.

"I just can't believe it. Any of it. It's been six fucking months since graduation! Now Billy's gone. Leslie's having a baby, and neither one of us knows whether we're the father or not!"

"Crazy, isn't it?" Kevin observed. Alec was silent again. "You're gonna disown it?"

"Fuck no!" said Alec quickly.

"How come?"

"If it's mine, then I'm not gonna run away from it!"

"But you're so good at running away!" said Kevin.

"What the hell does that mean?" Alec asked.

"Back when you were cheating on her, you thought getting married would settle everything, right?"

"It would have! If ONLY she had said yes and married me, things would be so different!" Alec said. "I was never given the chance!"

"You never though actually TALKING things over would contribute to solving the problem? You know, actually HUMBLING yourself for a chance instead of making everyone else feel like shit?" Kevin asked.

Alec snarled. "Well, look at you, hypocrite! The morning after, you weren't even gonna TELL me Les was in there with you! Be honest, if I'd never stopped by and she'd never come out of your room, you would've kept the entire thing a secret from me, because that's MUCH better than what I did!"

Kevin shut up for a second. "Touché."

"You bet your ass, touché!" Alec stared down at Kevin, still sitting on the bed. "You thought you were gonna march in here and set me straight, didn't you? You are Mr. Right and I am Mr. Wrong! Well, guess what, Kevin? What'll happen if the baby's yours and I'm off the hook? Did you ever think about THAT? I bet you wouldn't be NEARLY as preachy as you are now! Because I HAVE a steady income! What if you lose your op-ed gig? THEN what? Even with it, you couldn't support Leslie and a newborn! So don't be so quick to be Leslie's hero, because from where we stand the odds are 50/50, and neither of us are worthy of fathering her children and we both know it, okay?" Alec took a deep breath after his rant and turned away to walk out of the bedroom. 'I need a drink…" Alec walked into the kitchen, followed by Kevin. Alec poured a shot-glass full of vodka and downed the whole think in two gulps, gasping for air after.

"My god, your right," Kevin said.

"About what?" Alec asked.

"Neither of us being good enough," Kevin said softly. Alec looked at his friend. "We both have too many faults. You're too full of yourself to raise a child, and I can't find a use for my life because I always sit around moping about my next move. It's almost like we both need a baby."

"Huh?"

"I need a baby to give my life purpose, and you need one so you can see that the world isn't yours to lord over as King Supreme," said Kevin. Alec nodded.

"She's my first and last," Alec remarked.

"Alec, do you still love her?" Kevin asked. Alec looked almost horrified at the notion.

"That's not your concern. Are you?" he retaliated.

"THAT'S none of YOUR business. The fact is, while neither of us are perfect for Leslie, the fact is, one of us fathered her baby, and until we can find out who it was, we both owe it to her to stick around and help her out. Because I was 15 when my sister got pregnant, and boy, did she NEED help!"

"What do you mean?" asked Alec.

"Leslie may seem messed up now, but I guarantee you, when her belly starts getting bigger and she gets even more pregnant, she's gonna have a LOT more problems!" Kevin said ominously.

"Like what?" asked Alec interested. Kevin shorted as he recalled the hell that was his sister's bout with teenage pregnancy (she was only 3 years older than he).

"Well, let's just say Thai food wasn't exactly invented in Thailand. It was invented to keep pregnant women from burning down the country," he said. Alec rolled his eyes.

"It can't be THAT bad!"

"Oh, you wanna bet? Remember that picture I showed you with me in the hospital bed with a back eye and 20 stitches in my cheek? That was only from Clarice's SECOND trimester!"

Alec's eyes widened. "What did you do to her?"

"I called the baby "she" when we'd known for a week it was a "he." Luckily she had the baby a month early or I might not have lived to tell the tale myself."

"Oh goody, sounds like fun!" Alec moaned.

"That's why we both need to promise Les we'll be there for her. I've already told her that, but you need to go to her place and tell her the same thing."

Alec put down the shot glass and nodded. "I love her." He said.

"Me too," Kevin nodded. Alec got on his coat and went out the door without another word spoken between the two of them.

Expect for one moment after Alec closed the door to his apartment, in which he said, "No, I REALLY love her, dumbass!" before descending the stairs to the street below.