"Frost offered to cover for me for the rest of the day." Jane walked into the medical examiner's office and leaned against Maura's desk, arms crossed. "Nice of him, wasn't it?"
Maura half-closed her laptop, turning her face up towards Jane. "That was sweet. He asked me if I knew what was bothering you."
"I figured he would when I sent him down here. What did you tell him?" The detective was eyeing the doctor with a suspicious, guarded look.
"I told him that I'd noticed you were stressed lately." When Jane's 'oh, come on' look penetrated her sunny outlook, Maura realized she should add more. "Barry said that you were behaving just as you had when I was kidnapped by Patrick Doyle. I was worried about you, Jane. If this is just as hard on you as a fear for my physical safety, then it's even worse than I realized, and I don't want you to feel like that. When Barry told me that he wanted to send you home to work out whatever it was, I was grateful to him, and I asked him to let you know I'd be happy to go with you to help, if you wanted me." Unlike with Barry, who had startled her into revealing more with her partial recitation of the truth than she had intended, Maura was prepared for Jane's suspicion, and her facade was entirely smooth. Her girlfriend did not need the added stress of knowing that her partner had her figured out. Not yet.
Jane gave a huff. There's more to this story. Either I'm getting better at telling when she's giving me partial truths, or she's getting worse at telling them to me. "I see the card I gave you is on your desk." She smiled. "You like it that much?"
Maura nodded. "I really do." Suddenly her hands went chill. She sees right through me.
"I'm glad." Stepping away from the desk, Jane leaned down to place a hand on either side of Maura's chair, effectively pinning the doctor in place. Eye to eye, the detective gave just a hint of a smirk, "Frost like it, too?" I think I might be getting better at reading her. Will wonders ever cease?
This is what it's like to be a murderer, Maura realized, and know that this woman was going to get you to give up your confession. She shuddered, and decided it wouldn't hurt as much if she allowed it to happen. "He found it when he searched my desk, Jane. I didn't tell him. I didn't have to. He thought you, we, were being threatened, and that we weren't saying anything to him and Vince out of fear for what they would think. He cares about you, Jane."
Figures. Nothing's ever easy for me, is it? But I guess I knew this was going to happen, didn't I? Yeah, I kind of did. Frost's good at his job. With a gentle sigh, Jane leaned forward and kissed her still shuddering girlfriend. "You're a lot cuter than most of my interrogation suspects," she whispered against soft lips.
Way better than being a murderer, came Maura's instant mental correction as she let out a soft moan. Stress, fear, and even the most chaste of kisses, all at once, was a heady cocktail. Still, she knew Jane was disappointed, which took some of the swirl out of that drink. "Thank you. Wow. For a moment, I felt what your suspects must feel. It's... strangely appealing, but I don't think I want to put you in the position of having to do that again." Unless you want to do it again. Oh, good grief, Maura, why don't you just ask her to use the cuffs? How cliché. She cleared her throat and sat more upright. "In the meantime, are you going to take Barry's offer, or did you just come down here to pump me? F-for information, I mean?"
"Well, if you're offering," Jane let her voice trail off as she stood up to lean against the desk again. "Yes, I'm taking his offer. I've been thinking about this thing with Ma, and I think it's time I showed her exactly who I am. I'm not doing this halfway." I'm a Rizzoli. That's not how we roll. "If she and I are going to brawl, it's going to be all or none. I don't think I can take much more of this stress anyway." She ran a hand through her hair, flipping it to throw the unruly curls in the opposite direction from where they rested. "I'm thinking that who I am is really less who I am and more who I am plus who we are." She looked down at the doctor. "What do you think?"
Maura nodded, then tilted her head in puzzlement. "Could you rephrase?" she asked as she patted her lap, an offer of a little more closeness before they left that office for whatever Jane wanted to do. It was shorthand: I don't understand, but maybe if you put it another way, I'll be able to sort it through.
"Yeah," instead of taking the offer, Jane reached down to pull Maura out of her chair and into her arms, laying her head against the other woman's chest. Her heartbeat is… calming? Soothing? Nice?... Who cares? I like hearing her heart beat. "I promised you last night that I'd talk to Ma today and let her get to know me now. But, who I am now is more than just me. I… Maur, you're a part of who I am now. So, if she's going to get to know me, she has to get to know us, too. Make sense?" I hope it does because it's as good as it's getting. I don't know how else to explain this.
Maura's fingers thoughtfully stroked Jane's hair, then one hand trailed down the shoulder to lace their digits together. The way they held one another had quickly replaced the Musée d'Orsay in her mind as the most beautiful thing she had ever encountered, and that was long before romantic love had become an overt part of their relationship. "It does make sense. In practical terms, are you saying you'd like me to come with you? I will."
"I'd like for you to come with me, but I won't force you. This is a partnership, Maur. I don't want you do something just because I want you to. I want you to come if you feel like you should." Jane inhaled deeply, enjoying the light scent she associated with her girlfriend. I wonder if there's a study out there that shows a relationship between the touch and scent of someone's partner and de-stressing? There probably is. There's probably a better way to word that. I bet Maura's read the study. I should ask her at some point.
The light huff of breath Maura exhaled was not strong enough to be a chuckle, but it did come with a smile, faintly visible in their reflection in the window of her office door. She knew Jane would see it. "I want to come with you, Jane. Last night, you said I shouldn't because you needed to do this alone, but I'd always intended to drive you there, wait in the car for you, and be there immediately when you left, however long it took. But only because I couldn't go in with you, without your permission." I love her warmth. I love it when she puts her cheek on my chest and then talks, the way her face moves against me. This chemical reaction that she produces in my brain and in my body, how did I live without this? I should tell her about it sometime. She would be interested to know about the connection between pheromone output, touch, and emotional response. "Would you like to do this at your apartment, or in a public place?" There was no way she would suggest her own home, to which she was sure Angela would not come, nor the family home in which Jane had too many memories of struggling against restrictions, watchfulness, expectations, and the inherently unequal relationship between parent and child.
Reluctantly, Jane pulled back a little. "I called her already. We're supposed to meet her at the park in," she checked her watch, "twenty minutes. Before you ask, yes, she knows you're coming." For a brief moment, her eyes grew distant. I really like the park. Maura looks amazing when the sun is shining down on her, and… and I hope I haven't ruined that place for me. I hope this turns out okay. I hope. Jane groaned. "We better go. If we get there early, we can just sit on a bench and enjoy the sun. Ready?"
"Ready," Maura agreed with alacrity, though pulling back from Jane so that they actually could go took a bit more willpower. "And Jane?" She swung her purse up to hang from her shoulder, then caught Jane's hands in hers one more time. "You've got this. You are awesome."
"It's funny you should say that," the detective said with a chuckle as she opened the office door for the honey blonde. "I tell myself that exact same thing all the time."