Chapter 4: Imma Wolf!

Link awakens in a cell with nothing but dust and debris. The place, rather damp, had a little mold growing in the corner. Recalling the past events, he remembers writhing in the grasp of an unidentifiable black figure. He remembers feeling pain, but the situation registers in his mind when he looks down at his front paws. Wait...paws?

Link: Great. Just great. I'm stuck in some sort of castle or something without food, water, or company. As a wolf. Now I suppose some sort of Pixie is going to show-

Midna: Hiya! Eee hee hee! Did I scare you?

Link: Not exactly what I had in mind by a pixie.

Midna: I'M NOT A PIXIE! Now I'm just going to stand here on the other side of these bars *fazes through bars* and watch you dig your way out of this mess.

Link: HEY! No fair! How come the hero never gets any cool powers?

Midna: First of all, I'm Twilli and can do that. Second, it's because giving the bad guys all the cool powers makes the game harder and that's what the developers want.

Link: What game? Because I'm pretty sure this isn't a game.

In the PO of PO's universe:

Moi: Ha ha! DIE you stupid Bulbins! *mortal draw*

Link's Universe:

Midna: Forget it.

Link uses his newly wolfish senses to sniff out an area of loose dirt and digs, ending up on the other side of the bars. Midna seizes him.

Midna: I think I like you, so I think I'll get you out of here. But you need to do *Pulls back Link's ear* EXACTLY what I say.

Link: So I'm going to be your slave?

Midna: Pretty much. Would you do it for THIS? *Pulls out tennis ball*

Link: *Begging* YES! Just gimme the ball!

Two hours later...

Link: I think we're lost. We've been wandering these sewers *shudder* for hours.

He rips apart yet another twilight monster, watches two more aluminum cans float by, and sees a ring suspended from the ceiling.

Midna: Lemme at that ring! Jump off that ledge!

Link jumps off the ledge and Midna grabs the ring with her handy grabby thingy on her head. The water level then rises.

Link: Yeah! Now we have the means to cross those spikes over there!

Link swims over the spikes and arrives at a gate. Midna fazes through the bars (again).

Midna: Let's see you get over here. Eee hee hee!

Link's eyes wander over to a now submerged hole in the wall. He swims over to a side walkway, tuns a corner, and runs until he reaches a dead end, noting another ring identical to the one they had seen before. He jumps off the ledge just like before and miraculously manages to grab hold of the ring with his mouth. His weight causes the chain to lower and makes the water level drop again.

Link: That was exhausting.

Link runs back to where Midna was and goes through the hole.

Midna: That took way too long.

Link and Midna proceed and find a room with a spiral staircase. Link tries to jump one of the gaps in the stairs, but he epically fails.

Midna: What are you doing? I guess I have to do everything for you.

She warps over to the other end of the gap and signals for Link to jump over. The absence of Midna's weight allows him to clear the gap with ease. After several similar instances, they finally reach the top. They head through the window that leads outside.

Once outside, Link notes the strange atmosphere; a faint, orange glow stippled with tiny, black particles penetrated the air. The rooftops held an uncanny resemblance to a castle's.

Midna: Just a little farther! There's someone I want you to meet.

Link runs across a long rooftop and senses a spirit.

Soldier Spirit: WROAR! I WANT A MORE IMPORTANT ROLE IN THIS STORY!

Link: Let's just ignore him.

Link pushes a crate to help get atop a higher ledge, then continues running across rooftops. After a minute, he looks back to see that he's being chased. By giant birds. With laser guns. (Just kidding)

Link: AHHH! Get these pesky things off of me! *Bashes one with his head*

Midna: *Burp* Do it yourself. And by the way, they're called Kargarocs. *Eats doughnut*

Link: Grr. You're useless.

Once all five Kargarocs were taken down, Link continues through another window and runs up a staircase. He proceeds through an open door, only to come face to face with a mysterious cloaked figure.

?: Hero, I have been waiting for you.

This chapter is brought to you by Barnes' Bombs.