Of Flamethrowers and Butterflies

by Colwyn

The comparison of Fang to a butterfly, how not to greet a Flyboy, and the misuse of college funds, all contained in one crack-packed list of how to badger, vex, and generally harass the Flock. Rated T for copious amounts of humour.

4. Bedtime Stories

Chapter 4: Bedtime Stories

Just because Max hears voices in her head does not mean she needs to be taken to the psyche ward.

Similarly, I will stop driving Max to the psyche ward.

I will not casually suggest to Max that force feeding Ari Professor Lupin's wolfsbane potion and/or okra could potentially stop his transformation as this is mindless and will never work.

I will not assert the White Coats are actually men with giant needles with very obvious reasons to be tracking the Flock. *Cough, pyschos, Cough*

On my honour, I will try; To save the world from the apocalypse.

The bird droppings on my car are really bird droppings, not Avian-

American droppings. Insisting that they are Avian-American droppings is unwise.

I will not tell Ari that being in love with his half-sister at age 7 is mind-blowingly sick and suggest electro-shock therapy as treatment.

Playing fetch with Ari is not a good way to waste time. Because on the

off chance you are playing fetch with him, your time is very limited.

I will not read slash-fics and read them as bedtime stories for the younger of the flock. Just...just no.