When we pulled into one of the seedier motels in Chicago, it seemed inevitable. I nearly sighed in resignation, knowing that my sensitive hearing would pick up on the cheap hook-ups and one-night stands. Listening to sex wasn't really my thing. But I was too wound up to care much.
I walked in between the brothers, behind Sam and in front of Dean. They didn't try to talk to me, possibly because they still felt awkward about the conversation in the car.
When we reached a room on the top floor, I was pushed into a seat, though not roughly; Dean seemed deep in thought about something. I sat quietly, fighting a rising sense of dread. Every demon instinctively feared angels, even the fallen kind. It didn't matter that I knew he couldn't kill me as he might another demon. He could still hurt me, and I wasn't the kind to embrace physical pain.
When Sam handcuffed my hands behind my back, I didn't resist. They called for Castiel, and I tried to retreat deep into my mind, to my happy place. I wasn't having much luck.
"Hello."
My head snapped up. Castiel was standing in the doorway, looking at the boys. Dean drew him aside and told him what he wanted in a whisper, unaware that I could hear every word. I cringed slightly when he asked him to touch my soul.
"Okay," Castiel agreed, then walked toward me. I held myself still, looking him in the eye.
"This will hurt," he warned, and then he reached inside me.
I was braced for it, but it still ripped me open to my core. Burning, tearing, agonizing pain assaulted me. I clenched my teeth against the terrible pain, biting back screams worthy of the pit. He was cautious, obviously not wanting to cause my soul to explode. I could've told him it wouldn't happen, but I was busy restraining my reaction to the agony.
When he was finished, I sagged against the chair. He pulled the brothers aside.
"I've never felt anything quite like it. Her soul is exactly half human, half demon," he said in low tones. "The two halves have grown together and intertwined until there is no way to separate them."
"Is she... inherently evil?" Dean asked hesitantly.
"It seems that she's bipolar, in a way. At any time, she could swing between her separate halves. And there's no way to tell what her triggers are beforehand." He frowned. "You are playing with fire here."
Dean and Sam looked at each other for only a couple seconds. "We'll keep an eye on her," Dean said. I sighed, not sure which outcome I had wanted.
When I looked up again, Castiel was gone, and they were looking at me.
"I'm going to uncuff you," Sam told me.
"No need," I replied, then superheated the metal with my mind until it snapped. I brought my hands forward, absentmindedly rubbing my wrists where I had chafed them earlier, while Castiel hurt me.
They stared at me.
"I have a few tricks," I told them. "But if you're willing to keep me alive, you should know what my 'trigger' is."
"What is that?" Dean asked, arms crossed.
"Anger," I replied. "But it's still a bit hard to predict."
Sam cocked his head to one side.
"I don't necessarily go wild every time I'm angry... I just know that I'm always mad when it happens. That's all the help I can give you with that."
"Dean, I hate to say this, but she's a ticking time bomb. Why do you want to keep her around?"
I looked at Dean with wide eyes. He scanned me from head to toe, and my body went cold and hot at once, mistakenly taking it as an appraisal.
"I don't know," he said, "but I don't think it'd be right to just kill her. I don't even know if we could."
I stood up, wanting to shake off my strange mood. "I'm hungry. I can treat you... there's a diner down the street."
"How do you have money?" Dean asked sharply.
"I have a specific skill set which happens to be very valuable," I replied. "A good hit woman is expensive."
"A professional killer? That's just great, Dean." Sam looked exasperated, and I stifled a chuckle. The expression looked funny on him.
"I wasn't killing innocents, boys. I am allowed to pick my own jobs."
When they didn't answer, I sighed. "I really am starving. So if you want to keep an eye on me, you'll come with me. There's a meal in it for you."
I turned and headed for the door. After a beat of hesitation, they followed, and I smirked to myself. I could tell they didn't completely distrust me, but they were obviously puzzled... my smile disappeared. I didn't want them to know everything about me.
The food was okay, but the awkwardness started to fill the empty air about halfway through the meal, and I noticed they would tense a little any time I leaned over the table for my drink or salt and pepper. It made me feel... strange. I was used to frightening people, but I actually wanted them to relax around me. The whole thing was confusing.
When I was finished, I tossed a couple large bills on the table and walked out, knowing they would follow me. Back at the hotel room, I turned to face Dean, then sat on one of the beds.
"Okay," I sighed. "There are a few things I can tell you."
The two of them sat on the other bed, facing me. I glanced down at my hands. "First, I'm a child of prophecy."
"A prophet of the Lord foretold you?" Dean looked incredulous.
"Hell has prophets too," I retorted. "Azazel, Lilith, and Crowley all had the same vision of me. The circumstances of my birth, my unusual abilities, certain things which they say I am destined to do. What can kill me. It's the reason my mother was treated with such care. She was important because she was destined to bear me."
Sam stared at me in horror. "What were you meant for?"
"I was supposed to be Lucifer's right hand. His ultimate weapon, a servant to be kept by his side. A trump card, if you will."
"Then why weren't you there when he rose?" Dean asked.
"Before the first seal was broken, I murdered my mother. I had discovered she was manipulating me toward that end, and I was still human enough to hate her for it. Then I went on a demon-killing spree to demonstrate my unwillingness to play my role." I winced a little, and Dean shifted, trying to read me. "The consequences were unpleasant. I was in hell when he rose; they didn't want me to prevent it. The plan was to throw my soul back into my comatose body once he had possessed Sam, so I would be unable to stop anything."
"How long were you in hell?" Dean.
"Around two centuries. I escaped when Lucifer was thrown back into the box. Hell was chaos for a time."
"You said something about 'what can kill you,'" Sam commented. "So you can't be killed like any other demon? Or human?"
"No. You could behead me right now, and within five minutes, I would be whole again. And a powerful, pissed-off demon mutant to boot. There is only one way to kill me, and it will never work. Not now."
They stared at me for a moment.
"No," I said, in response to the unspoken question. "I won't tell you my Achilles heel."
"Yeah, I can't say I blame you," Dean almost sighed.
"What are your abilities?" Sam asked.
I considered for a moment. "You know, I don't mind telling you that. I'm faster and stronger than any human, for one, and every one of my senses is about a hundred times stronger. On Earth, I am more powerful than any demon, but in hell I'm weaker than all of them. And I might as well be Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde."
"Not gonna argue that," Dean commented. "You were pretty fierce when you went off on all those vamps."
"Yeah, well, she and I were working together on that one. We were both angry. Usually she just takes over in those situations, and I lose my say in the matter."
"She?"
"My demon half."
"You're separate?"
"Yes and no. She and I have separate voices inside my head, but we agree on a few things." I glanced at their incredulous faces. "And no, I'm not crazy."
Finally, they nodded.
"So, what now?" I asked.
"More vampires are headed to the area, apparently." Sam replied. "We think it's because of you."
"Obviously," I snorted. "Darius won't rest until he has my head on a silver platter. The moron doesn't realize he can't kill me."
I realized their plan a moment later. "Take me with you," I said, trying to disguise a slight pleading note.
They looked at each other.
"I'll just follow you if you try to restrain me," I stated quickly. "This way, you can keep an eye on me. Save yourself some time and effort."
"Dean-"
"She's right, Sam. It'll be quicker this way."
I nodded gratefully at him, ignoring a quick stab of anger in my gut. Damn vamps.