CHAPTER FOUR *******************************************

Justin got a big grin on his face, "Everything!" He turned to Brian. "You have to come too. It's only fair. I'll explain on the way."

Justin explained as they drove to the hospital, "Stuart and I wanted a family, so we paid a surrogate to carry our child. With the heart disease in his family he wanted me to be the father, so we used my sperm. The mom is Sarah. She's a lesbian and she and her partner are going to use the money for down payment on a house here in Pittsburgh. That's what made her such a good choice for us… she was living in New York, but was originally from the Pitts. She wanted to move back and be with her partner in a home here. Her partner, Angie, is pregnant with a friend's sperm and due in a couple of months."

Michael asked, "Why didn't you tell us?"

"I knew you guys were worried about me losing Stuart. I really hate pity. I thought if you knew about the baby, too, it'd just make me more of a pity target. Oh, poor Justin has to raise a kid alone. Well, you know what, this baby is going to be my ticket to happiness again and I can't wait!"

Brian understood Justin's aversion to pity. He'd avoided telling people for the same reasons when he had cancer. He also remembered how Justin was after the bashing and his reaction to pity then. He was happy to see Justin so optimistic again. "You'll be a great dad, Justin."

Justin was giddy with excitement. He put his hands on top of his head. "I can't believe I'm going to be a dad!" He phoned his mother while they were on the way to the hospital.

In what seemed like moments later, the three of them were running down the hallway towards the maternity ward. It was a replay of what they had done years before when they went to see newborn baby Gus.

Once Justin identified himself with the staff there, they had him put on hospital clothing and he went into the delivery room. Michael and Brian paced in the waiting room. Justin's mom, Jennifer, and sister Molly soon joined them. Sarah's partner Angie did some pacing in the waiting room, too. The law and the hospital rules wouldn't allow her in the room with her partner. Word was that the contractions had come pretty fast and delivery was probably going to be within the hour.

Sure enough, about 45 minutes later, Justin emerged with his famous Sunshine grin on his face. "She's beautiful! A healthy girl. Seven pounds, five ounces and lots of hair." He hugged his mother, then sister. He spoke to Angie, "She did great. She's doing fine. We'll get you in there as soon as possible." Angie cried and hugged him. Then Justin turned to Michael and hugged him, then Brian.

Within an hour the new mother was in her room with her partner by her side. She was holding the baby. Everyone who was in the waiting room was now inside the room, fussing over the beautiful baby girl. Brian stood to one side, sort of feeling like an outsider. He wasn't Justin's partner or boyfriend, just a friend along for the ride. He smiled, though, and enjoyed watching the new dad, remembering the day he held his son Gus for the first time ... the day he met Justin.

Later, 'Dad' was holding the baby and surprised Brian by walking up to him. "So, Brian. We're thinking of names and I feel it's only fair that you help us pick."

"Me? I don't, I mean…"

"Come on. I named Gus, right? So, we're considering Ava or Madison. What do you think?"

Brian smiled as Justin handed him the baby girl. "Well, Madison makes me think of Madison Avenue, which reminds me of work, so, not my first choice for a name. Ava makes me think of the great actress Ava Gardner. She was a beauty, just like this one here. So, I prefer Ava."

Justin turned to Sarah, who nodded in agreement. "Ava it is. Ava Sarah Taylor."

Brian gently kissed the baby. "Hello, Ava Sarah Taylor. Welcome to this world." He handed the now sleeping child to her mom.

Justin said, "Her middle name will be Sarah after her mom. Also, the middle initial 'S' will remind me of Stuart who wanted this baby very much." He looked up and said, "I know you're watching over us Stuart." He teared up and started to cry. Brian was still standing next to Justin and instinctively took him into his arms.

Jennifer got misty, too. "It'll be OK, Justin. We're here to help you."

Brian said, "You have people here who love you and will help you, OK?" He couldn't believe how easily that came out and how much he meant it. That gave him a little hope that maybe there was a place in Justin's life for him.

7/5/07 – Last minute sitter

Brian was in his office one late afternoon a few days later and heard his cell phone ringing. The caller I.D. said "Sunshine". He smiled and answered, "Hey."

"Hey, Brian. How's it going?"

"OK. What's up?"

"Listen, I need you to do me a huge favor. Are you getting out of the office soon?"

"Sure. What do you need?" Brian could sense that something was bothering Justin.

"My sister Molly broke her leg at a soccer game. She's going to be OK, but she's going to be in the hospital for hours… possibly overnight. I'm here with my mom and I brought Ava. The baby is going to need to eat soon and I didn't grab enough stuff and … I need you to babysit her and feed her."

"OK, but what about Daphne?"

"She's not answering her cell. Sarah is visiting Angie's parents out of town. Deb is working a double shift…"

"I get it. I can be over in a little while. You're at Allegheny?"

"Yeah, we're in the ER waiting room."

"I'll be there." He clicked off the call, closed up his laptop, chatted with Cynthia briefly and then took off.

Brian found Justin in the waiting room, walking around holding a fussy baby. "How's Molly?"

"She's OK, just a simple break. But they are considering if she needs a pin in it. I really appreciate this, Brian."

"No problem. I have experience with babies. Well, Gus, anyway. Put her in the car seat and help me get the other part of it into Cynthia's car."

"Is she here?"

"No we traded cars. I didn't want to try to put a baby in the front seat of the 'Vette. Wouldn't be safe anyway."

Jennifer went up to Brian as Justin was putting Ava in her car seat. "Thanks for doing this. Here's my house key. Just take her to the townhouse and all of her stuff is there."

Justin went over the care and feeding instructions while they transferred the car seat holder. He prattled on about what to do.

Brian finally stopped him, "Enough already. We'll be fine. Go be with your mom and sister." He kissed him on the forehead and drove off.

At the hospital, Molly was staying the night and Jennifer was set up in a recliner/bed in her daughter's room. Justin arrived back at the townhouse around midnight. He was home to relieve his brunet babysitter. He tiptoed upstairs and entered his room. There was Brian, asleep in the rocker/recliner, holding Ava. He had her propped up, so, even though he was relaxed, she was supported. She was asleep, too. There was a half empty baby bottle on the table next to them. His suit and dress shirt were hung up, so he was just wearing dress pants and his sleeveless undershirt. Justin thought that the whole scene was beautiful. In fact, he pulled out his cell phone and took a picture.

Justin whispered, "Brian. Wake up." He carefully took the sleeping baby from Brian's arms and placed her in her crib.

Brian felt the baby move away and woke up. "Huh, what? Oh, hi. I must have dozed off. Is she OK?"

"She's fine."

"How's Molly?"

"She'll be home tomorrow with a cast up to her knee. They decided at the last minute that she doesn't need a pin, but are keeping her overnight anyway. Mom's staying the night."

Brian yawned and his eyes were still half closed. "Mmm. OK."

"How was Ava?"

"She ate. She crapped. She burped. Usual baby stuff." He got up and peered over the side of the crib. "She was very good, though."

"So you got to recall the joys of changing a dirty diaper, eh?"

"Yeah, I was worried for a split second that the penis fell off, and then I remembered that this is a girl. I've only changed diapers on Gus." He smirked, and then started to put his shirt and jacket on.

"Funny."

Brian looked again at the sleeping baby. "She's a real doll, Justin." They smiled at each other. "Well, I should go. I have a presentation in the morning. Come and get that car seat thing out of Cynthia's car. Oh and here's your mom's house key."

They went downstairs and transferred the car seat to Justin's car. The blond shivered from the cold night air and Brian hugged him.

Justin said. "If you want you can just sack out here. I'll buy you breakfast at the Diner before you go to work … my way of thanking you."

"I have to shower and put on fresh clothes. You know I can't be seen two days in a row in the same ensemble. If I go home now I can get a few hours of sleep. Thanks, anyway."

"OK."

Brian raised an eyebrow. "Maybe we can have a sleepover some other time when we're not babysitting."

Justin closed his eyes, remembering how good it had always been having the arms holding him at that moment holding him all night long. "Tempting. I'd better get back inside. Thanks again. I owe you."

"Big time." Brian smiled, then lifted Justin's chin until their lips met. The kiss was sweet and tender. "Later."

"Later." Justin sighed. He watched Brian drive off. He looked again at the picture on his cell phone. He hit a few buttons and made that his wallpaper. That was an image he never wanted to forget.

A letter from New York will bring out emotions.