Chapter Four
Jane sorted through the hotel-provided bath products, all luxury items made right there in France, as the bathtub filled. There were salts, bubbles, and some sort of fizzy thing. What the hell, she thought. I'll just put them all in. She dumped each item in, one by one, and watched as the hot water fizzed and bubbled, which she supposed was the kind of thing Maura liked. The mirror over the bathtub reflected the window in the opposite wall, giving them two views of the glittering Eiffel Tower outside. Jane pulled the curtains closed most of the way, but left a little sliver so they could still glimpse the Tower. She was going to miss this view.
They were almost halfway through their time in Paris, and a month was starting to seem like not enough time. Jane had yet to feel homesick, though she did Skype with her mom every few days. Instead, she was very much enjoying being in a little bubble with Maura. The sudden shift in their relationship had turned her world upside down. Maura was, as Jane might have expected, an absolute goddess in the bedroom. Jane loved every little thing about her glorious body, and she made Jane feel things she hadn't even realized were possible. At first she'd tried to hang onto every detail from each sexual experience so she could replay them in her mind, but after nearly two weeks, they'd done it too many times for her to keep track. One thing she knew was that she was never going back. The whole experience had just confirmed what she always knew, deep inside: Maura was her soul mate. The only logical thing for them to do now was to spend their lives together, which meant she had some serious decisions to make.
Maura padded into the bathroom, wearing only her matching hotel bathrobe and slippers, just like Jane had on. In her hands were a bottle of champagne and two glasses. She set the glasses down on the tiled ledge on the side of the bathtub and filled them up.
"It feels like we're on our honeymoon, and we're not even married yet," Jane remarked as Maura slipped off her bathrobe, revealing a perfectly sculpted body, and climbed into the tub.
"Yet?" said Maura with a little raise of her eyebrows, picking up her champagne glass.
Jane shrugged off her own robe and joined her in the tub, facing her, fully aware of Maura's eyes moving up and down her form. She reached for her own champagne. "Well, I certainly got the impression that was where you expected this to head, what with your calculations of how long we would have been married by now if we'd gotten together any of the times we each thought about it."
Maura smiled. "I suppose it's hard for me to picture a relationship with you ending. I can't imagine wanting it to end. All I've ever wanted since I've met you is to be with you as much as possible. I don't think pledging my life to you would be that difficult."
Jane smiled sadly. "I wish I'd known you were thinking about that all this time. I thought I was doing the right thing by just trying to be your friend, but I was hurting you."
"Jane, you could never hurt me. You've always made me happy."
"And sad."
"More happy than sad. And look at me now! Now I'm happier than ever, because of you!"
Except for one thing, Jane thought. Maura was still wondering if this situation would be permanent. Jane couldn't leave it to the end of the month to tell her the answer to that.
"Come here," said Jane, reaching out her arms. Maura turned her body around and scooted back so she was between Jane's legs, leaning back against her. Jane wrapped her free arm around the naked body of her girlfriend (it still felt weird to call her that, but it was undeniably what she was). "I almost wish we could stay here forever," she said, planning a kiss on the side of Maura's head.
"Me too. But things don't have to be so different, when we go back home."
"I know, and I hope they won't be, but we'll have Ma and everyone to deal with. It'll be interesting to see how they all react when we tell them about us."
Maura looked up. "Do you want to tell them right away?"
"Well, we can cross that bridge when we get to it, but I don't see any reason to wait, once we get back. We won't be able to hide it long anyway. But for now, we can just keep it to ourselves." She sipped her champagne, her other hand wandering up to play with Maura's breast.
"Mmm." Maura leaned her head back. "I love that this has turned into a romantic vacation, but I've got to work more on my book tomorrow. I'm falling behind!"
Jane smiled. Maura's original itinerary had involved a balance of writing and sightseeing, which had been thrown off when the activity of "lovemaking" had been thrown into the mix. Today they had planned to get out, but it had never quite happened. In fact, they'd never even managed to get dressed. Every time they started to get ready to go out, they'd gotten carried away and ended up in bed again. Maura got a little writing done when inspiration suddenly struck her after lunch, but she was still wearing just her robe, and it had fallen open partway as she earnestly typed on her computer, revealing the swell of her breast. Jane had been unable to control herself. They ended up fucking on the couch.
"Well, I can't make any promises, but if you wear clothes while you're writing, I might be able to keep my hands off you." Jane set down her empty champagne glass and reached for Maura's swollen pussy, lightly stroking her clit with two fingers. Maura whimpered, closing her eyes. Jane was getting good at this. Her absolute favorite thing was when she was inside of her, immersed in her wetness, Maura's hips thrusting so hard that she wasn't sure if she was fucking her or if Maura was just devouring her fingers with her pussy. Either way, Jane loved it. She wanted to do it every day forever. She couldn't believe she'd passed up the opportunity all these years, although she supposed it would have helped if she'd known the opportunity was there. There was no point in dwelling on that, though. She could only move forwards.
"Of course, we'll also make time for this," said Maura, reaching her hand up to tangle in Jane's hair.
"We'd better. So, first thing in the morning, I'm calling my supervisor at the FBI Academy and telling them they'll need to find a new instructor."
Maura's eyes flew open. "Really? You're certain of that already?"
"Well, yeah." Jane stopped stroking Maura's clit, although she didn't let go of her breast. "I have no intentions of going anyplace where we can't do this whenever we want. I don't know what my next career move will be, but it's not that."
"So you're moving in with me?"
"If you'll have me. I don't relish the idea of living with my mom, but I want to be with you."
"Jane, I'd love you have you! That way you won't have to worry about living expenses while you decide what to do next."
"So I will be a kept woman!"
Maura laughed. "I'm sure you'll find ways to earn your keep!"
"Yeah, I can always pay you in sexual favors." Jane resumed her stroking until Maura's back arched in orgasm.
~R&I~
After breakfast the following morning, Jane called her immediate supervisor in Quantico to explain apologetically that she didn't think the instructor position was right for her after all.
"All right, I'm going to go out for a bit and let you write," Jane said when she hung up. Maura was already hard at work at her desk.
"I can write with you here!"
"I know, but I want to go check out a few things nearby."
"Okay, just don't get lost. Take my phone with you. I don't like the thought of you being without one when you're out by yourself."
"You're starting to sound as paranoid as me." Jane took the phone and kissed Maura goodbye. "I'll see you in a few hours."
She headed downstairs and stopped at the front desk to talk to the concierge, her heart suddenly pounding in her throat.
"So, let's say I wanted to propose to my girlfriend while I'm here," she said.
"Ah, ready to settle down with that pretty blonde, are you?" he replied.
"Yeah, I think so. So where would I be able to find a ring?"
"There are several jewelry stores right here in the neighborhood. I can give you a map." He pulled out a map that showed the nearby shopping and circled the jewelry stores.
"Great, thanks." Jane frowned, trying to remember what Maura had said before about how she'd want to be proposed to. There was something she said the night Korsak proposed to Kiki, something about a proposal deserving champagne and…a string quartet? Oh, Maura. "So if I wanted to hire a string quartet to…I know this sounds cheesy, but to play while I proposed…"
"There is a string quartet that plays every week in our courtyard restaurant. I can give you their card." He easily produced a business card from under the desk. Damn, he has the answer to everything, Jane thought.
"Okay, so would you happen to know of a good spot to propose? I thought about the Eiffel Tower, but that seems so clichéd, and it's so crowded."
"You need something romantic, but relatively private, no?"
"Exactly."
"I know the perfect spot," he said, pulling out another map.
~R&I~
One lengthy explanation later, Jane practically had the proposal all planned out and was browsing jewelry shops, trying to find the perfect ring. The problem was that most of the rings looked so ordinary, which didn't seem good enough for Maura, and the styles tended to jump straight from ordinary to gaudy with no in between. She was beginning to think about proposing without a ring and letting Maura pick her own back home when she finally saw the perfect one.
It was gold, with delicate little flower petals covered in tiny diamonds, a larger diamond in the center. It was pretty and unique without being over-the-top, just like Maura.
"Could I see this one?" Jane asked the jeweler. As the woman removed the ring from the case, Jane suddenly remember Maura's unimpressed reaction to her engagement ring from Casey. "Why would I squeal over a colorless, crystalline form of pure carbon?" she had said. Of course, her reaction might have had more to do with her disappointment that Jane was marrying Casey than any dislike of diamonds. She wore diamond jewelry all the time, didn't she? Still, she might prefer something with a splash of color.
"Would it be possible to replace the bigger diamond with a different jewel?" she asked hesitantly.
"Of course. What would you like?"
"Purple's her favorite color. Do you have any of those purple stones?"
"We have amethyst, and we have purple sapphires. I can show you our loose stones."
Jane looked at the stones, but it became painfully obvious to her that she knew nothing about jewelry. She told the jeweler this, and the woman gently explained to her that sapphires were better than amethysts, and she could find her the perfect cut to go in the ring. When she picked out the stone, it looked good to Jane, and the jeweler promised Maura would love it too.
"Do you know her ring size?" she asked.
"Uh, no," Jane admitted.
"You want this to be a surprise?"
Jane nodded.
"You will have to measure her then." She pulled out a little plastic thing that looked like a cross between a ring and a ruler. "You just put this on her finger – has to be the correct one, or the measurement will be wrong. Even the same finger on the other hand will be different size." She placed the sizer on Jane's left ring finger. "You tighten it like this," she pulled the tab so the sizer was snug on Jane's finger, but not tight, "and then you can see her size right here. You have to make sure it is pulled just so, not too tight, not too loose."
"Okay, but won't she figure out what I'm up to when I come at her with this?"
"It is easy. You just do it while she's asleep."
Jane grinned. "Okay. I can do that." She pocketed the ring sizer. "So you have to resize it and replace the stone. How long will that take? We're only in Paris for another two and a half weeks."
"Since we already have the ring, we can get it done in two weeks. We do everything here, we do not send rings away. If you get me her ring size tomorrow morning, we will have it ready for you in time."
"Okay, I'll make sure I get it tonight." Jane felt like a weight had been lifted, until she saw how much the ring was going to cost. But Maura deserved a good ring, and Jane had a decent amount saved up with no particular purpose in mind, so she sucked it up and paid the deposit. Then she went outside and called the number for the string quartet, telling them when and where she wanted to propose, and got them scheduled to show up for a short gig (although she had to agree to pay them for a longer gig, and in cash…this was turning into a very expensive operation, but she supposed she'd never have to worry about money again if she married Maura). With all that taken care of, she wandered off in search of a chocolate shop (they had them all over the place here) to see if she could find Maura a special treat.
She certainly hoped she was doing the right thing by proposing to Maura. She was relatively certain Maura would say yes, would be absolutely delighted, in fact. And she knew they'd be happy together. There was really no doubt about that, and it seemed like the logical next step. They'd been in love, albeit secretly, for seven years. Now that they finally had that out in the open, the only thing that made sense was to settle down and begin their life together. They didn't need a period of courtship; they'd essentially had seven years of that already. But Jane kept running through certain images in her mind: Maura lying still, stunned and helpless, while Hoyt cut her with a scalpel. Maura crouching, terrified, in a dark, abandoned tunnel, hands cuffed, a sharp piece of metal clutched in her hands. Maura telling her as bravely as she could that she'd had some bleeding on her brain and was now suffering cognitive impairment. None of these things would have happened if she hadn't been close to Jane.
But she supposed Maura was right that the opposite also happened. She thought of the time she'd walked into the morgue to see old Detective Leahy with a gun to Maura's head. They'd worked together to take him down, but Maura probably couldn't have done it alone, so she likely would have died if Jane hadn't been there, and it wasn't Jane's fault he wanted to kill her. Then there was the man who killed Maura's brother, who likely would have ended up killing her too if Paddy hadn't killed him first. Paddy was only able to do that because Jane saw to it that he got the right information in time. She also maybe deserved credit for keeping Maura alive when they went out to that yoga farm with the fracking. If Jane hadn't been with her, she probably wouldn't have been able to get away when they shot at her, and she certainly would have lost her leg. And when Dennis Rockmond tried to kill her, Jane was the one who figured out he was the serial killer they were looking for and tracked him down before he could hurt her, then talked him into letting her go before he killed himself. And not so long ago a man had tried to shoot Maura to death, for reasons that could in no way be blamed on Jane, but Jane had snuck up on him and put a gun to his head before he could. So she supposed she'd saved her from outside danger more times than she'd put her into danger.
Nevertheless, she knew the proposal would make Maura happy, and certainly quality of life mattered as well. So that meant it was the right thing to do, right?
Maura's phone started ringing in her pocket. She took it out and saw the words Agent Davies on the screen. Maura must have added him as a contact once she found out who the number belonged to. Jane was still pissed at him for looking up Maura's number, and anger bloomed in her chest when she saw him calling now.
"Why do you keep calling Maura's phone?" she hissed through gritted teeth as she answered.
"Hello to you too. Your phone isn't working right now. I don't know how else to contact you."
"Why do you need to contact me?"
"Apparently you're no longer calling me. What's this about you backing out of the instructor position?"
"I realized it was a mistake. I'm staying in Boston."
"What made you change your mind? I thought your life needed a new direction."
"It does, just not…that direction."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
She sighed. "What it means is really none of your business, to be honest. Thank you for everything you did, but—"
"What about us, Jane? I thought we had something."
"Yeah, well, it wasn't meant to be."
"How can you be sure about that without even giving me a chance?"
"I did give you a chance. What we were doing was me giving you a chance."
"You didn't seem let down at the time."
"It wasn't anything you did, it was just that…I realized I belonged with someone else."
There was dead silence.
"So anyway, I'm sorry it couldn't work out, but what I'm doing now is what I need to do."
"It's not…it's not her, is it?"
"Does it matter who it is? Look, I'm trying to let you down gently. Nothing else is going to happen between us, and I'm not coming to Quantico. Please stop calling this number."
"I won't…Jane, I thought that…"
"Oh, sorry, losing my connection, bye!" Jane hung up and shook her head in disbelief. If he tried to call again, she decided, she was going to block his number from Maura's phone.
But she had better things to worry about right now. Finally coming across a chocolate shop, she went in and bought a box of chocolates to share with the woman she hoped to marry and headed back to the hotel.