Wanderer

Chapter Four

Eve wriggled down deeper into the bed roll, tucking her hands underneath her head as a pillow. The bed roll was no match for the comfort of that bed in Vlindrel Hall. The Dragonborn sighed, rolled over and wriggled around again to find that comfortable spot where the rocks wouldn't be digging into her sides.

It was gone past midnight and the auroras were blessing the sky in rich tones of orange and red and they illuminated the tent through the tiny cracks of the stitched hides. In the distance she could hear the fire crackling merrily away and she thought of how cold Argis must be, and that he should be in this tent, in his bed roll possibly with her too.

Eve groaned, rolled onto her back and pressed the palms of her hands into her eye sockets. She couldn't think that way, seriously? Wanting to bed her Housecarl? Divines, why was she so stupid? The man probably didn't want anything to do with her; after all he probably liked his women tall, built well and with the right amount of tits and ass that she clearly didn't have. She was scrawny from lack of decent meals and she was lean, too lean maybe. She ground her palms deeper into her eyes and prayed for the ground beneath to swallow her up.

There was just no way that anything between them could happen. It just couldn't. She had Bran's memories and she had sworn to herself that that would be enough. But it wasn't, Divines she was dumb enough to deny that fact. She sighed, expanding her chest to its capacity and letting it all rush out. Maybe Argis already had a woman he was sweet for, maybe there was a girl back in Markarth that was waiting for him and that was where he spent some of his free time when she had been sick. Divines why did that thought make her stomach hurt?

She chewed the inside of her mouth nervously, arms propping her body up behind her. She peered out of the tent again and saw him spinning his sword in the ground, staring up towards the shining lights that were dancing in the navy sky. If he had a woman she was damn well lucky.

Eve scowled, huffed and flopped back down on the bed roll. She hadn't got an ounce of sleep and she wondered if Argis knew that too. Divines, they could be keeping watch together and talking about things, like personal things, maybe if she had a girl he was sweet on. But not just that she wanted to know everything about him, his favourite colour, or what made him become a Housecarl, or why Markarth, or why did he style his hair in such a way that was ridiculously cool?

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

It was supposed to be professional and yet nothing about, whatever this was, was professional. At all.

She groaned, sat up and fished through blankets and bags to find something that would make a decent pillow, at least something that wouldn't itch or make her head hurt. She kicked her feet out in the bed roll, pulled the extra material over her head until she was fully enclosed and dived into the mountain of blankets she had pulled out of both hers and Argis' satchels.

Eve took a lungful of air, smelling Argis' musk on the blankets and frowned. Was there just no escaping him at all? She rolled her eyes in the darkness and shuffled to the tents opening and peered outside again.

"You're supposed to be sleeping." He was facing in her direction, probably having heard her wriggle around, probably disturbing his 'man time'.

"Can't," Eve replied, tucking the bed roll further over her head until it crested her eyebrows. She pulled the bottom half up to her chin.

"Well you should try," He turned his attention to the sky once more, turning his back to her. Eve rolled her eyes. Yes she was obviously disturbing his man time.

The Dragonborn quietly slid out of the tent, holding onto the baggage of bed roll that threatened to trip her up as she hoisted herself towards Argis where she plonked down next to him.

"You look like you've never seen the auroras before," She said quietly, shifting onto her side as she reached an arm underneath to pluck a stray stone that had been aggravating her tail bone.

He grunted a response, looked down and tossed a few more logs onto the fire.

"So," Eve started before she trailed off with a sigh.

She shuffled closer to the fire, resting on her haunches whilst warming herself from the bitter wind. The dark abyss of the cliff edge lay beneath her and the stark bareness of Skyrim's true nature only came really apparent at night. Nothing stirred except for the occasional pebble that was caught in the wind or the howl of wolves somewhere in the forest below or towards the mountains peek above them.

"The lights will turn purple by the time winter truly settles in," She began whilst rubbing her fingers together and blowing on them. She wasn't expecting to make decent conversation with him after all he still seemed to be ticked off about what happened the previous night. Whatever it was he had a stick rammed up his ass and frankly, Eve was starting to get annoyed with it.

They were supposed to be having fun, Gods know that Eve had had incredible adventures with Lydia and the rest of the poor Housecarl's that had been assigned to her. What made Argis so damn stubborn? Eve drew her button lip between her teeth and nibbled away. It was annoying, even more annoying that she was warm to her form and it was clear that Argis wasn't to hers. He tried to keep as much distance between them and then there were his obvious mood swings. Back at Vlindrel Hall he had been just as temperamental and she had thought that maybe some exciting adventure would clear his senses. Obviously not.

"Aye."

"The first time I saw them was when I came to Markarth for the first time," Eve tucked strands of hair behind her ears, gave him one quick glance before returning to the fire, "Saw a person killed right in front of me in the market."

Argis made a little noise beside her and she turned, catching his gaze. His eyes glistened in the orange fever of the fire. Eve tucked more hair behind her ears before giving him a crooked smile.

"They were beautiful though," She trailed off.

"The killer or the victim?"

Eve frowned, scowling in his direction.

"The aurora's," She stated darkly whilst watching the corners of his lips twitch like they had done just before he had hoisted her up onto his shoulders. She started biting her lip again and looked up at the sky.

The orange hue of the borealis danced along the sky, lined with flecks of green and strips of red. Hidden behind the canvas of light were dots of little iridescent stars and tufts of dark navy clouds that were likely to bring showers of rain in the early hours.

Eve ignored the warmth in her stomach as she thought about what it had felt like to be pressed so close to him. She wriggled around where she sat, adjusting her position and wiping down the sweat on her palms.

"Are you cold?" He asked; his voice gruff and so deep that it didn't help Eve's devotion to not think about how much she fancied the pants off him. He wasn't helping at all and if she was honest her lack of effort in that department wasn't exactly helping either.

Eve only managed to nod, wrapping the edges of the bedroll tighter around herself.

"Here," She peered over her shoulder and watched his movements. He had scooted off the rock and now sat with his back pressed against it. He gestured for her to move between his legs and Divines knew what that would do to her, "I'm cold too."

The Dragonborn swallowed before shuffling towards him, she nudged his knee, and then caught her elbow on the inside of his thigh making him grunt before nestling herself in the gap he had made for her. Not exactly graceful, but then she was always bad at making impressions.

"Lie back," He insisted, taking hold of her shoulders and pressing her back into his chest.

"Um."

"Aye better," She felt his hot breath at the nape of her neck then his hands at hers, pulling them in to wrap around her waist. He held her there, loose enough to keep it friendly but tight enough that she could still feel every inch of him. The same warmth from before writhed in her stomach and she settled further into him; She tucked her fingers into the spaces between his hoping he wouldn't mind.

"I'll be looking forward to this winter," The sound of his gravelly voice so close to her ear sent a slither of pleasure down her spine.

"Why this winter specifically?" She managed to croak out. She couldn't help the thought that she was the reason he was so looking forward to this winter creep into her mind. Eve felt that same shiver of heat pass through her stomach, a nervous yet excited feeling. She couldn't deny the fact she was easily getting too attached to this giant ginger oaf, but he was deliciously warm and although he had mood swings she was drawn to him in a way she had never been drawn to anyone before. He was going to be the very foundations of her beginning.

"Do you read the stars my Thane?" The sudden formality shook her from her reverie. The delicious warmth that had curled in her stomach became a tense knot and she was brutally reminded that nothing was going to happen between them; and the fact they were sitting like this was only a matter of keeping warm.

"When I was younger my father used to sit me out on the porch, extinguish all the fires burning away and point up to the sky and read them to me." Eve had taken such little things for granted at the time, but she had been young and strung up on her father's words. He spoke of the adventures in the stars, of wars and gory battles and she had loved every single detail that he uttered. She believed now that it was all made up because how could a bunch of tiny little dots really tell some sort of story? Stories weren't written in the stars, they were written by the mouths of the warriors who had spilt blood and sweat to survive the tale.

"And what did they tell you?" He asked; chin resting on the crown of her head. She could feel his breath again and it caused a shiver to run down her spine. She couldn't let herself get too carried away, but she could feel the cracks of her defensive wall starting to break and she knew that it wasn't because he was trying to break them down but it was because she was letting it crumble.

"That men were brave, and full of courage and valour," She shook her head, "My father was a great story teller."

"Do you not believe those stories?" Eve swallowed down a laugh and replied:

"They are old wives tales!" She chuckled whilst nuzzling further back into the curve of his body, "My father probably thought that if he told me about all these strong men he might have gotten a son to be proud of when I was married off."

"He'd marry you off?" He started chuckling, sounding surprised. She could feel the rumble of his laughter in her spine and it was a sweet feeling, "A strong woman like you?"

"I was different then." Eve tilted her head and latched onto the sky, staring at the flickering stars that stretched across the navy sky. There had been a time when she'd been a little girl with dirty knees and soil buried so deep in the beds of her nails that she couldn't scrub it out; she had been innocent once. She never used to have scars from bar fights or worse, she used to have a dainty figure till she developed the muscle needed to survive outside of harvesting crops. It was easy to forget such things when life was so fast paced and only lived one day at a time.

"So what happened?" He pressed, tightening his arm around her waist. How long would it take her to explain the extent of her life story to him? Divines, it would take years and then what? He'd ridicule her for running away from a family that loved her; perhaps he'd damn her to the worst parts of oblivion if he knew that she had been a Daedra Worshipper. She didn't want to risk it. However much she tried to deny what she felt for the man, she would never jeopardise his opinion of her, and she'd never utter a word of her past to him.

"I became the Dragonborn remember?" She leaned forwards, wriggling out of his grasp and shuffled towards the fire, "If you're tired you can go catch some shut eye whilst I keep watch."

Eve listened to the creaking and clatter as his armour moved along the stone and she watched his flickering shadow turn away from her. A heavy feeling settled in her gut and she tucked her arms around herself. It was for the best she told herself, repeating it until the words sealed the cracks in the wall she had built up to defend her delicate self. Distance had to be kept between them, she could be warm to his form and bed the man but there was going to be nothing more. There couldn't. She couldn't handle losing someone again, not someone that she loved.

The Dragonborn brought her knees to her chest and sighed into the gap between her knees, she bent down and grabbed a log then threw it onto the fire where it crackled and spat. She heard Argis rummage around in the tent, probably tidying up the mess she had made in there. Eve knew that it would be easy to fall in love with a man like Argis. But she had a strong enough will to not let that happen. She'd made that mistake once with Bran and like hell was she going to make that same mistake twice.