The Magic Within

By Schroederplayspiano

Chapter 4: Whenever It Starts

Light purple mist surrounded Emma. It floated passed her and lit up the night sky. Soon the beam dissolved into a misty cloud overhead and Emma could not distinguish the purple out anymore.

Surrendering, Emma lay down and placed her hands behind her back. It was enough to watch the light show. She did not have to dissect the magic out of it.

She felt him lean back beside her. His presence was soothing, more than she cared to admit. Why did she feel so safe beside him? Was it due to the mystical show above? It would be easier to admit that than the fact she always felt safe in his company.

Questions were on the tip of her tongue, but Emma stuffed them down. The painted night sky was too beautiful to ruin. She sighed and picked out another light beam to follow. A stream of blue swirled passed her, sparkling under the stars. It floated passed them, covering them like a blanket before flying away.

The blue mist was the last beam to make it out to them. Twinkles slowly faded. While the light show did continue, it was less than before. Emma knew it would soon be over and all that would be left was the occasional colored spark.

Still lying in the grass, Emma shifted to her elbow. Scrutinizing the man next to her, she whispered. "Why did you bring me here?"

Graham raised his brow and matched her position. An amused smile teased his features. "I told you, to give you a night you wouldn't forget."

Night breeze ruffled his curls further and wafted his fragrance towards Emma. She inhaled it. Under the stats, Graham's eyes twinkled. They enchanted her. She wished she could stay here forever; with him under a magical cover, hidden away from the rest of the world.

"Yeah, but," Emma played with a blade of grass between her fingers. "Bringing me here defeats your entire point."

"No it doesn't." He leaned closer. "There are better ways to spend your time than practicing magic."

Emma sat up. "That was your point?"

Graham threw himself back on the ground and spreads his limbs out. "That was," he emphasized. "My point."

Emma restrained from laughing at him. She pursed her lips. "Oh, I see." A nod. "And here I was thinking your point was that I spend too much time around magic and soon I will become addicted to it like Regina."

Graham froze. Only his eyes moved, scanning left and right until they located Emma above him. He was trapped in her serious gaze.

"Because," she continued, "If that was your point and you were worried about me spending too much time around magic, bringing me to the fairies' hollow to watch them do magic is a strange way of doing that."

He blinked once. Twice. His lips parted, ready for an argument, but then closed again.

"You are so cute when I catch you in the act."

Still, Graham stayed silent. He chose to watch Emma above him, tilting over him, flirting with him instead of speaking.

He couldn't help sitting up. Their shoulders brushed against each other and Emma scanned over him, watching him leaned in.

Just as their lips touched, Emma pulled back. He swallowed. He blushed. He couldn't look at her. His hand fell from her cheek to the grass below.

Emma couldn't focus. Her thumping heartbeat made it even harder to concentrate. A thousand thoughts, possibilities, flew into her mind, but she did her best to avoid each one. "Can you answer my question?"

"I did answer – what question?" Emma detected defensiveness in Graham's voice. That, accompanied with his hurt expression, put a frown on her face.

"Why did you bring to this magical place if you are so afraid of magic being in my life?"

"Magic is part of your life. It is part of my life, Emma. We're in Fairytale Land, there's nothing we can do about it."

Emma stared at him. He hated that. He hated her power over him; how it was so easy for her to level him with her gaze.

He waited for her retort. She didn't need to speak it for Graham to know what it was. "But that is not your point," he voiced her thoughts. "You won't let me get away with doing something nice for you, will you? I am not afraid of magic in life, Emma. I'm afraid of that man. I'm afraid of you spending every free moment at his castle. I'm afraid that you're keeping it a secret. There's a different between watching magic and practicing it and I don't want to lose you, Emma."

Emma bowed her head. Hair strands fell over her face. She picked some twigs off her dress. "You already lost me, Graham," she whispered.

"No, I know – that's not what I – Emma-" She turned to him at the longing in his voice. He parted his lips to speak, but nothing came. They were trapped in each other gazes again. Graham tried to remember her taste in his mouth, but the heaven was hard to recall. He tucked his chin. "I want you to be happy," he admitted breathlessly. Graham studied Emma's features in a way that made her chest heave. Every contour, every hair curl, every line was memorized. "I don't you to lose yourself to magic."

She tucked hair behind an ear and raised her gaze to meet his. Accompanied with his declaration, the intensity of his gaze overwhelmed her. Emma tried blinking it away, but her efforts soon failed. "I don't want that either," she admitted.

"So," Graham paused, thinking over his words before speaking. "You know it is a possibility, then?"

Blood pulsed through Emma's veins and rose to the surface, putting her on edge. Graham continued to challenge her with his gaze, which didn't help her stress. Emma focused on the fairy lights in the distance and waited for the humiliation to pass.

"Emma?"

She flung herself to her feet and grabbed dress fabric to fling around her. With her face already marred with emotion, she started. "Of course I know that! You think I stepped into this thing with no worries or hesitations. You think I'm a naïve-"

"You are not naïve-"

"Little girl who doesn't know how magic can destroy someone's life. You think I don't know what magic did to Regina-"

Graham stood; a passionate arm was thrown between them. "Then why do you keep going back?"

"I don't have a choice!"

Shoulders heaved. They starred each other down. Graham replayed her words on a loop until he reached a breaking point. He shook his head and scoffed at her. "You say you're not like her, but you are. Regina thought she didn't have a choice either." A frown formed in defeat. "I can't save you every time, Em," he whispered and walked away.

Emma watched him go and spread out her arms. "Who asked you to!" She called after him. He didn't turn back, though. The more distance came between them, the more Emma's heart rate sped. As Graham started to disappear under the cover of darkness, she could not contain her desperation. "No. Wait!" She yelled after him. "Stop!" One foot forward. "Please, stop!" She sprinted through the grass after him. "Graham," she reached for his arm. "Please," she spun him around, "Let me explain."

There was not an inch between their foreheads. Graham looked down Emma's nose and noticed his own touching it. When their gazes collided, he pulled back.

"I can explain." Emma said, still trying to catch her breath.

"Don't bother." Graham threw up his arms. "I give."

He took a step back. Emma pulled him forward.

"No. I owe you an explanation," she begged. "Just let me explain."

Graham sighed. He crossed his arms, but did not speak.

"Okay," Emma regrouped. "It is different for me than for Regina. I am the product of true love, Graham. I hate admitting it and I hate saying it out loud to you, but that's what I am. If someone tried to pull my heart from my chest, they couldn't." Emma stopped her speech when concern took over Graham's expression.

"You never told me that before."

Emma nodded, focused on the ground beneath them, "Yeah."

"IF?" Graham's thoughts caught on one word. "Has someone tried?" Outrage started to emerge in his voice. "Have they?"

Emma replayed the memory of the man trying to take out her heart. It was a memory she promised not to share with anyone. "It doesn't matter."

"Emma…"

"No!" Her brow narrowed and her forehead crinkled. "I've told you enough! For all I know, you are going to run to my parents all worried about me-"

Graham's voice deepened. "I told you I wouldn't."

"You already threaten to at least once today."

"I was just worried about you," he whispered.

"I know." Emma played with her dress sleeve. "I know you are, but I have enough people worrying about me. That's not what I need or want from you."

It took work for Graham to not to step forward and cup her face. "What do you want from me?"

She dropped her dress sleeve. "Stop comparing me to Regina. Stop bringing up Regina. She's dead – or locked in Storybrooke. She doesn't matter anymore. I want you to know I have the one thing she strived for but could never have. Pure magic is in my blood. It's who I am, Graham." She reached for him. "If I learn to control it and enhance my skills, I could help so many people."

"Or hurt them."

She pointed her index finger straight at him. "That. That right there. You're lack of faith in me is why we can't be together. I need someone who supports me, who cheers me on. You can't do that."

"After my history with Regina, can you blame me?"

"No," Emma's voice broke. She took a step back. "I don't blame you, Graham. But, I can't be with someone who doesn't accept who I am." She started to walk away, wondering if her tears would wait to fall until her back turned.

"Emma, wait…"

"Leave me alone, Graham," she demanded. The fields opened before her; welcoming her in to explore, to run, to be free. She picks up the hem of her dress before starting to sprint away. "Just leave me alone."

Instead of cooling down, every step from Graham had more spirit in it. Soon, Emma was stomping through the woods. She didn't know where she was or where she was going. She didn't care; all she needed was her own moral compass assuring her that learning magic, proving her magic could be helpful and not harmful was the only way to put her mind at ease.

Emma didn't know where she was going until she arrived there. She banged on the door.

"Rumple!" Her yell echoed through the night. "Open your damn door!"

A/N: Each reviewer chose love and magic! Glad we're on the same page. Hope Emma's (and Graham's!) choice satisfied your eagerness. :] Thanks for your consistent feedback and participation. Keep it up!