To anyone who was an active reader of this story and to anyone who really liked it and waited for updates, I'm so sorry that it's taken me this long to get around to it. Sometimes life just gets in the way, and I was experiencing such writer's block that I almost gave up on this story. So thank you if you continue to read and thank you for your patience with me. Thankyou for your wonderful reviews and words of encouragement, they are what drives me to write.
Chapter 4
You don't know true fear until you look death right in its face. You don't truly fathom what the hell a titan actually is until you see it breaking through 100 feet structures and devouring lives. Steam from the heat of the Colossal Titan seared at mine and my fellow cadets' skin and blew us from our positions on the wall. My mind was paralyzed with fear and utter confusion from the sudden arrival of the ginormous Titan. Even though the onslaught of refugees from Maria and the tales of Eren and Armin should've been proof enough, deep down in my heart, I almost believed he was just a tale of mere fiction. I didn't actually believe something so horrendous, and so much bigger than our little walls could ever exist.
Yet here it was, with boiling winds sending me to the ground to become a pool of jellied remains for titans to snack on. Why can't I move? Why have I accepted defeat so easily? Was I not supposed to join the scouts, and fight these creatures until my very last breath? What a disappointment I am, what a waste of time energy, and rations I've been. I couldn't even make it to graduation day. I couldn't even fight the good fight long enough to prove to my parents that I'm more than every disgusting thing they told me I was. Oh well, at least this death will be honorable. Nobody will ever know the true circumstances.
But the impact of my fall never came, because a strong body swooped in and caught me before I could meet my demise. Eren.
"What's your fucking problem! We don't have time to fuck around, and I told you I don't have time to play babysitter with you! Take your head out of your ass and report to the Garrison's headquarters, we're fighting a war right now whether your ass can handle it or not!" Eren shouts in my face loudly over the sounds of screaming and wailing. It was rude as hell, per usual, but at least I was alive. At least I wasn't smashed into the ground, and for that I'm grateful. Before I can respond to Eren's shouts of anger, he whizzes off in the direction of the HQ.
I follow suit and remind myself that I was the very best with the ODM gear. That I have the balance and strength necessary to at least flee danger if need be. As I'm soaring above blood-curdling screams of mothers looking for their babies and crowds being hoarded into the mouths of titans, I think something so selfish and silly, something so juvenile, that I can't help but be disgusted with myself. Eren was mean to me, and he was probably so upset that he had to save me because he'd rather be protecting Mikasa and Armin. Why does that hurt so bad? Isn't that how it's always been? Before I know it, I'm at HQ, my sulking cut short and my mind being thrown back into the reality of our situation.
"I want everyone split into four squadrons, as practiced! All squadrons are responsible for supply-running, message relay and enemy combat under the command of the Garrison Regiment! The Interception Squadron will take the vanguard, Cadets will take the middle guard, and Rear Guard goes to the elites!" a garrison high ranking officer belts into the crowd of soldiers. I prepare to go with my squad in the middle guard when an officer I don't recognize approaches me.
"Dinan, we need you in the rear. Come on," he says to me monotonously. I'm shocked beyond belief.
"I'm just a cadet though, I'm not even in the Top 10 of my graduating class! What could you possibly need me for?" I cry out. I don't care that I'm not blindly accepting his order and I don't care how pathetic I sounded in the moment. I can't help but have flashbacks to the fifteen minutes ago that I couldn't even get my brain to function well enough to not fall to my death. How am I going to beneficial to the Elite squad, if not as Titan bait?
"It's because you're smart, and a beast with ODM. Sometimes it's better to have a sound mind, great balance and a heart full of fear, rather than an idiot with a jumbled mind, great balance and zero fear." deadpanned Mikasa as she and Eren approached the mystery officer and I. I realized that some of what she said seemed to be targeted towards Eren. Can't say that I disagree *shade thrown*.
"I'm on your team too. Apparently, they need little rookies like us," she said. Eren looked furiously at me and then the officer, and I could tell that one of his minutely blow ups were about to occur.
"Are you seriously taking Mahala with you to the Elite Squad? She won't stand a fucking chance there, what good are her smarts if she just freezes up when they actually matter! You're sending her on a suicide mission!" Eren screamed. Part of me tried to act appalled that he would speak to a higher up that way, but another part of me was so happy that my friend was actually showing concern for me, no matter how rudely stated his concern was. I noticed that Mikasa looked bothered at the outburst, I guess she doesn't like the disrespect.
"Anytime you deal with a Titan, you're on a suicide mission kid. Get to your fucking squad and follow your fucking orders. Ackerman. Dinan. Let's go." the officer stated before walking off.
Before we could walk off Eren grabbed us for one last word. "Stay alive Mahla." he bites out with fire in his eyes. "And Mikasa, don't let her die. You're good enough to not let her die" he says before walking to his own squad. Damn.
We get to the rear, and there are elites soldiers everywhere slicing the napes of titans fiercely. I recognize some of the soldiers' notorious green capes. The scout regiment. I'm in awe seeing the amount of passion they whizz through the air with, and the amount of hatred behind their cries as they kill. So this the might of scouts, our heroes. It's kind of tragic that they had to come home from expedition to this bullshit. It must've been bad out there if they're home this early, but if anyone can help us now, it's them.
"GET TO KILLING! THOSE NAPES WON'T SLICE THEMSELVES!" a female voice yells.
I whizz through the sky, and my sights land on a titan standing against an abandoned home. 'It's now or never Mahala' I thought. I swing fiercely form building to building, withdraw my sharp swords and whirl my body to create the perfect slice on the Titans' nape.
'I'm going to kill my first titan!' I thought. The thought of being a help, somehow and someway, brought a small smile to my face. I'd kill this titan and walk away to tell the story. I couldn't believe how quickly my luck had changed., but then I noticed something extremely peculiar about this titan. It had brown skin like mine. It had coarse black hair like mine. And its eyes, now staring at me, were black just like mine. The shock of seeing this rare titan made me lose my balance in my ODM gear, and I crash landed onto a roof, almost completely rolling off of it, and barely hanging on. 'Since when are there black titans? Since when is there black anything?' I thought.
My train of thought was derailed though, as the black Titan stalked toward me with that wide, vicious smile on its face. It grabbed my torso and lifted me in the air, and I found myself wishing that I'd just fallen to my death. Any death was better than this.
.
Who said that. The voice was so quiet yet close that I almost thought it was just a voice in my head. Until I saw the titan was staring into my eyes, almost as if it recognized me, and seems like it was expecting something of me. But that's not possible, because titans aren't intelligent, they can't expect anything. Can they?
.
'Did this thing just talk to me? Why isn't it eating me.' I thought. It's drawing my death out much longer than necessary. Water flows from my eyes as I cry at the cruelty of this creature, wishing it would just kill me quickly when I hear a slice across its nape and its grip on me loosens.
I fall toward the ground and am caught in muscular arms before the impact ever comes. I look into the eyes of my hero with thick tears cascading down my cheeks, and my breath catches in my throat.
Captain Levi just saved my life, and he looks pissed about it.
Author's Note: As you can see if you've made it down here, I'm going to be twisting and turning the AOT universe a little bit. I just want to make it more than just the canon show, you feel me? So if you don't like the direction in which I'm taking the story, I thank you for reading and suggest another kind of story. Thank you.