Denmark and Norway | Northern regions of Scandinavia

"We're lost."

"Noo, pfft. Stop being so pessimistic. I know where we're going."

"You probably know where we're going, but you don't know how to get there. We've been stuck in the woods for two days, Mathias. And it was all your fault."

Denmark lowered his map and wailed into the frosty air. "I'm sorry, okay?! I didn't know bears liked mead!"

Lukas smacked him over the head. "Bears eat anything—including your stupid head! We've been going without food for 16 hours. Keep this up and we're going to end up as popsicles!"

"You're so mean, Nor!"

"And that's not all. Along with the food, the bear broke the godforsaken compass. How are we going to figure out which direction is North?"

"Err . . . it's pretty cold right now, so I think we're facing North."

Lukas stared at him. "Wow, I was right. You are an idiot. Are you sure the bear hadn't eaten your brain already?"

Mathais's stomach complained loudly. "Man, I'm hungry. Maybe I should just pick some shrubs and eat it?"

"If you haven't noticed, we're in the middle of a winter wonderland. I don't think anything here is edible—assuming there's anything here in the first place."

"Well, using the obvious logic, if we keep walking in a straight line, we'd reach civilization at some point, right?"

"In your universe, yes," said Norway very slowly, as if talking to a retarded child. "Right now we're in someplace called reality, Mathias. We're surrounded by forest, forest and more forest. The best we could do is wander for days and never meet a single soul. It'd be an eternity until we hit open road. Remember how long it took just to get here. We're completely on our own."

"C'mon! Don't be so negative. I'm sure somebody'll turn up and get us out of here." The Dane checked his cell. "No reception. That's fine. It's not like it would help anyway. Right, Nor?"

Lukas didn't seem to hear him. He was muttering off to himself. "I knew coming here was a bad idea. There's no way Emil, Berwald and Tino would be here. This isn't even our territory—if either one of them was here with us, maybe we'd find our way out. But the worst part of it is, I'm stuck with you . . ."

"We already checked with their parliament," said Mathias, missing the last words of Lukas's sentence. "Where else could they be?"

No one answered that. The truth was they didn't know how to respond. If not in their own countries, just where could they be?

"I forgot how long we've been here already," said Lukas. "In any case, we should keep moving, or we'll freeze to death."

Mathias shouldered his huge axe. "Lead the way."

Lukas rolled his eyes. "Right, because you're utterly useless. Remind me again why you didn't stop that bear from taking our food when you have an axe at your disposal?"

"Huh?"

"Know what? Never mind. You're an idiot."

"Huh?"

Lukas heaved his foot out of the deep snow and planted it forward. He ignored Mathias the rest of the way, who was so oblivious to this fact that he continued to pester Lukas with his idiotic and random observations. About twenty minutes later, they stopped at the sight of a small house in front of them.

"We're saved!" Mathias exclaimed.

"Not quite."

"What do you mean?"

"You don't know who could be living in there. We should be cautious—especially if it's a cabin located in the middle of the woods. Tell me that doesn't sound the least suspicious to you."

"But I'm hungry! Maybe they have food."

"Is food all you could think about?"

"What? I can't help it if—"

"Shh!" Lukas held his arm out to silence him. "Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

Lukas placed a finger to his lips, his head tilted to the side. Awhile later, he tapped his partner's arm. "Stay quiet and follow me."

"Oh, okay!"

"Do you not understand the meaning of quiet?"

"Oh . . . Sorry."

The two Nordics treaded stealthily to the right of them, of which the area was stippled with large evergreen trees. They crouched under the shelter of these broad branches.

Across the clearing, on the other side of the cabin, a faint trace of movement rustled from the tree line.

"What's that?" said Mathias. "A bear?"

"I don't think so. I could barely hear it myself, but with a bit of magical application, it was pretty clear whoever's there operates on two feet. Now shut up."

A few more seconds of disturbance in the foliage, and a slender figure emerged from the treeline.

She was definitely feminine, despite the strong, muscular build. The stranger carried a bow in one hand, a sack of arrows slung over her shoulder, and a large group of skinned game in her other hand. She had the steeliest of grey eyes and long, blonde hair braided back with intricate beads. A slight scowl adorned her face as she easily maneuvered through the snow. She wasn't old, nor was she young, but there lay certain wisdom in the way she carried herself.

"She's pretty," Mathias pointed out.

Norway smacked him on the head.

"What?! She is . . ."

"There's a strict policy we follow, stupid Dane, that says we cannot associate with humans—at least not on that level. I will not have you looking at females in this perspective."

"Chill, man. I was only looking—nothing would come out of it. You're so uptight, jeez."

Meanwhile the woman had moved on over to the tree stump located beside the cabin. She lay down her kill on the stump and beheaded them with a nearby axe, which typically served for chopping wood, if the pile of lumber lay out against the cabin wall said anything.

As soon as Lukas reached forward to hit Mathias again, her head snapped around to the sound of the noise and her bow was strung in less than a second. The next thing any of the Nordics knew, an arrow was embedded three inches away from Mathias's face, inside the tree trunk. The twang of the arrow notified them of how close they'd been to getting shot through the head.

Lukas clapped a hand over Mathias mouth, preventing him from saying anything more stupid, and urged him to stay down.

Who is that woman? I've never seen a normal human displaying such skill . . .

"Shame," she said. "I missed."

When she was done beheading the rest of the animals, she hauled them up and slammed the axe back down into the stump. Both Lukas and Mathias cringed at the dull thump.

If they hadn't died via arrows, that axe would not have hesitated to complete the objective.

The blonde woman moved off behind the cabin. As she disappeared from their sight, Lukas instructed Mathias in how to retreat.

"Why? I'm hungry. If we ask her, we can get some food!"

"Is it always food with you?"

"And beer."

Lukas resisted the urge to face palm. "Look, if you haven't noticed, she nearly tried to kill us."

"I'm pretty sure she could have succeeded if she wanted to."

"Just . . . back away with me, okay? We shouldn't bother her."

"Aww, okay. You're the boss, I guess."

"No, not the boss. The slightly more intellectual."

Without making a sound—or at least trying to—the two Nordics backtracked deeper into the forest. When they were out at a good range, they began looping around the clearing in order to head south. Or at least they thought it was south.

"Are you sure we can't go back to that cabin?" said Mathias. "I'm really, really hungry. So hungry that I might faint. And we can't go anywhere with a fainted me."

"Don't be such a drama queen. You'll live, Dane."

"But—but—but—"

A high pitched whine sped past their heads and landed in a tree opposite to them. It was followed by another arrow sailing through the air.

"What the—?" Lukas said. "She found us?!"

"Shit, this is so not good!"

"I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!" came the woman's shout. "THOUGHT YOU COULD HIDE FROM ME, HM? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I'M THE BEST TRACKER IN THIS AREA!"

"Like the only tracker!" Mathias shouted back.

Lukas kicked him in the shin. "Shut the hell up! I swear, you are the most senseless fool I've ever met!"

"YOU WILL PAY FOR THOSE WORDS, TREACHEROUS FIEND!"

Another arrow flew past them, this time much closer than before.

Mathias drew his axe. "Okay, we've got a crazy lady out to kill us. She thinks we're here for some malicious intent, but that's totally not it. Looks like we have to stand and fight. Ready, Nor?"

Lukas was running the opposite direction.

"NOR!"

An arrow suddenly appeared in his line of vision—Mathias barely found the time to chop it in half with his axe. He turned tail and ran too.

"COME BACK HERE, YOU SCOUNDRELS! FACE ME LIKE THE MEN YOU ARE!"

Does she have some kind of quarrel with males? I swear I haven't done anything!

Another arrow nicked him by the sleeve and caught him against a tree. He was stuck. After struggling for a brief while, he decided To hell with it.

Mathias undid his overcoat quickly—as quickly as one hand could go—and shrugged it off of him. He continued running. He would have to go back later and get it back.

He was desperately searching for any signs of Lukas, but the Norwegian seemed to have literally vanished out of thin air. Maybe that crazy woman finally got to him.

No, Matt. You must . . . think . . . positive . . . THOUGHTS. Nor doesn't die that easily. After all, he was a Viking once upon a time. Hehe . . . We're so screwed.

Denmark whirled around and planted himself firmly in his place. An arrow scraped him across the cheek and flew off into the distance. He was stunned; that was way too close for comfort.

"Please!" he shouted. "I give. Please don't hurt us!"

"SO YOU SURRENDER?!"

"Yes, yes!" he screeched. "I surrender. We surrender! Just don't shoot us anymore!"

There was an interval of calm. Mathias released a sigh of relief, thinking the battle was over.

And then Lukas barrelled into him, hurling him off his feet and propelling the both of them into thick underbrush—just in time for a fucking throwing knife to pierce the area where they were just standing seconds before.

"I SAID I FLIPPIN' SURRENDERED!" Mathias roared.

"YOU SAID TO NOT SHOOT YOU ANYMORE. AND I DID NOT SHOOT YOU!"

"God—freaking—dammit I did not see that coming."

Lukas untangled himself from Mathias and held up his hand. A glowing, green haze formed in the palm of his hand.

"What are you thinking, bro? You going to blast her? We can't hit girls!"

"That's right." Lukas stood. "But no one said anything about shooting girls with spells."

"I don't care, man. I just want her off our back! She freaks me out!"

"Don't think she's pretty anymore, now, do you?"

Mathias shook his head frantically.

"Well, then."

Lukas stepped out into the open. "Shoot us or harm us in any way one more time, and I'll blast you off your feet."

"HA! YOU CANNOT SEE ME. HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY HOPE TO HIT ME?"

"The same way you seem to be able to target us." Lukas fixed his palm into the snow. "Magic."

The green orb melted into the snow and shot forward like a laser beam, exposing the earth beneath and creating a pathway to where the woman was standing. It zigzagged around trees and bushes, finally coming to a rest just north-east of them.

"Found you."

Mathias was thunderstruck. He struggled to his feet and stared off in the direction the magic dictated.

The blonde woman materialized exactly where the pathway was made. Her bow was lowered and unstrung, thankfully. She appeared cautious with every movement she made.

"Best tracker, huh?" said Lukas. "You were only cheating."

The woman smirked. "No, I am still the best tracker. I only cheated in knowing where to shoot."

Mathias hid behind his brother, but since Lukas was shorter, it looked kind of funny. "W-what do you want with us?"

"You trespassed on my land. Something like that cannot be forgiven," she said.

"Something like that only mattered centuries ago," Lukas retorted. "We meant no mal-intent. We only wanted to pass through peacefully."

"Then tell me why you are here."

Lukas lowered his eyes to the snow-ridden floor. "Truthfully . . . we're trying to find our brothers."

The woman raised an eyebrow. "Your brothers."

"Yes. They've gone missing for three weeks. We were hoping to explore the territory and find them, but there have been no signs. We apologize for walking in on your land. If you permit it, we will leave immediately."

"Well." The woman rolled her shoulders back, releasing the built-up tension. "If it's a place to stay for the night, I would gladly have you over at my house. What do you say? It's mighty cold out here, and my cabin's nice and warm. You two can leave the following morning to continue your search."

"Excuse me?" Mathias stepped out from behind his brother. "Correct me if I'm wrong . . . but you tried to kill us back there."

The huntress batted her hand dismissively. "Oh, I was just trying to scare you. I could have killed you anytime I wanted to—but I didn't. You two provided me with fun sport, something I haven't had in a while."

"That's twisted," said Lukas.

"Say what you will."

"I told you she could've done it anytime," Mathias said. "But noo. You didn't listen to me."

"Shut up, Dane. I don't see how that could've made any difference."

The blonde woman coughed.

The Nordics stared at her for a few seconds, and then brought themselves into a huddle.

"Think we can trust her?" whispered Mathias.

"What other choice do we have?" said Lukas. "She can shoot us dead right here. And it's not like we can survive another day on our own, without food."

"So we're going with her."

"Looks like it."

"Okay."

They straightened.

"We'll . . . take you on your offer," said Mathias in his best rich bastard voice. "But any wrong move and . . . and Lukas here will burn you with his epic magic skillz."

The woman appeared amused instead of intimidated. "Magic, you say. Tell me—how is it you know how to do magic?"

"That's a really long story," said Lukas, already regretting exposing his powers. "It seems you are also of the magical sort."

"That I am. But it's limited."

"How come?"

It was her turn to peer at the ground. "That . . . is a really long story. I'd rather not go into detail."

Lukas didn't find it strange in the least. After all, since he was able to perform magic, that meant the majority of his people could, meaning there was a good possibility that this blonde woman here was only one of his citizens that decided to live a life of solitude.

"Shall we get going then?" asked the woman, gesturing behind her.

"Most definitely," said Lukas.

"Just one thing, though," said Mathias, shivering violently. "C-c-can I have my coat b-back?"

The woman blinked several times. "Your coat? I think you should be worried about your cheek. We should get that looked at before the hypothermia sets in."

"Hy-hy-hy-po-the-thermia?"

"Yes. Open cuts expose the blood, letting heat escape quicker. Sorry about that, by the way."

"N-n-n-n-no. We're c-c-c-cool."

Lukas eyed his brother with concern. "Cool? Try freezing cold. Your blood crystallized."

Damn. He hadn't noticed.