Summary:

The mind is a fragile thing.

Notes:

This was painful to write. Hope it is not so painful to read. This chapter is darker than the others by far...but hey, look, Eren! :D

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Moonlight was leaking in through the window.

Levi took notice and opened the blinds, with a short cough.

Everything was ugly.

The night was certainly beautiful. Fireflies danced outside, the moon had risen gloriously, and its reflection glimmered with pearly speckles across the water below. Large fluffly clouds were illuminated softly on the edges, just kissing the edges of the sky. But somehow it repulsed him to the core.

It was all just as ugly as he felt. Wait…

Wow. That was fucking depressing…how high was he?

He needed some music or something. Levi reached over to his tiny, old radio on a mounted shelf and flicked the on switch. Music came through, static crackles interrupting it every few seconds. Levi huffed at the white noise, unable to decipher the song, and wiggled the antennae at the top of the box until the music became clearer.

'Elastic Heart'.

Eh. There was worse out there, but this chick whining was a bit grating. He just listened to the music and sound of her voice instead of the lyrics. It was a beautiful song, that way.

He took another long drag from his piece, and let his mind wander to more important things. Petra was going to have a baby in a few months. He still couldn't believe it. That little strawberry blonde who'd had a crush on him all those years in high school. She'd grown in to a beautiful and successful lady.

Alas, also married to a successful, and reliable(and handsome, in her opinion, only) man; Oluo was working for Erwin, they were happily married, hell, they even had their own house. Levi could remember when Oluo had tried to mimic everything about him, down to his signature sour expression. All because he thought Levi was the shit. Tch. Well just fucking look at me, now.

Mikasa was due to graduate next semester, his lanky, awkward and often frightened baby cousin was gone.

He wouldn't have to protect her from bullies, ever again, or teach her to fight, scold her for getting her eyebrow pierced, help her study for tough exams, or lend her cash for that tattoo she'd so desperately wanted.

Levi squeezed his eyes shut set his piece on the bed spread next to him.

No. That shy child was lost to the past. In her place, a strong and confident adult had emerged, ready to take on the world.

Just like him 12 years ago.

What the hell had gone wrong? Erwin had gotten promoted to the head of the Sound Survey team, while Levi was laid off without a second thought. Steely blue eyes had looked down at him with pity.

Don't look at me like that.

The entire managing staff had known that Levi was better at gathering data and that he knew the sound better than anyone, but they'd still chosen Erwin. Seniority, they'd said. Budget cuts, they'd said. It had felt amazing to set their trash cans on fire.

Erwin…goddamn it, Erwin…

Levi's breathing had become ragged. His eyes were opened wide, his jaw set.

Don't fucking look at me like that

Empty consolations reaching out for him, a voice trying to comfort, showing genuine concern. Strong eyebrows over those disgustingly beautiful eyes. Those eyes.

DON'T YOU FUCKING LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT!

He put his hands over his eyes. Clawed at his temples. He clenched his jaw till it hurt. He just needed to think about anything else. Anything. Mikasa, Petra, Erd, Mike, Gunther, anyone. Anyone. The sound, the sea, his crab trabs, Kenny's shitty boat, the goddamn juice machine. Anything. ANYTHING.

A warm wetness over his eyelid distracted him momentarily. "hn?" Sweat in his eyes was no foreign concept, while it stung, it wasn't a huge deal. He tried to blink it away, but it wouldn't piss off.

Too thick for sweat.

Levi let go of his head, and in mild horror, physically felt his nails slide out of his scalp a bit. "…fuck.." His blood tipped nails sang the story of frustration and pain.

Erwin would have a fit if he saw this. 'You're falling apart, Levi.'

...Don't fucking judge me…

He felt the top of his forehead, right behind his hairline. Sure enough, it stung, and his fingers came away with blood. He rubbed at his face, realizing the damage had been enough, that the blood had started to drip down into his eyes.

'You're acting like a child.'

He was breathing like a wild animal, loud and shallow. His own voice came through each huff, deep, emerging from his chest, turning each breath to a snarl. Baring his teeth at nothing. He viciously wiped his face. No. He was fine. Doing well.

Don't look at me…

He just needed to get a grip. He focused on every breath, slowing each down gradually. All other sound was blocked out.

Inhale.

Exhale.

The air entered his nose and mouth. It filled his lungs. Pushed his diaphragm. Tugged his mind into existence. He was alive.

Each wild heartbeat pounded in his temples and aching cuts.

Each heartbeat slowed as he calmed down. Each was a promise. A promise of life. His body didn't want to give up yet.

Inhale.

Exhale.

He wasn't sure when he'd felt his head hit the pillow, or when he'd even decided to lie down. Certainly not sure when he'd drifted off into a restless sleep.

Levi opened his eyes. Well, he thought he did. He blinked, and everything still looked the same. Murky darkness.

What the hell?

He looked around, he could sort make out light coming down from above, not much else. He tried to walk or take a step forward, anything. He found that he couldn't. Weightlessness suspended him in place.

Where am I?

His thoughts were a jumble. He couldn't focus. Everything was fuzzy.

Bubbles rose around him. Something was ascending from below.

Bright and brilliant teal-green shown in the darkness like two glowing embers. A flash of scales, blue, green and gold. A massive tail swished in and out of sight.

Was he underwater?

I can't breathe-!

A sound in the dark. A voice, deep, and gentle. You don't need to. Not here, anyway. You're safe. It resonated like a deep hum. Echoed around him.

He wasn't even aware that he'd spoken aloud. Levi watched, entranced, as the scales in the darkness caught the small light that seemed to filter down narrowly from somewhere above. They shimmered and vanished along with the glowing embers.

Where am I? He implored yet again. He didn't even need to ask, it was as if his thoughts could be heard. That explained a few things.

The two glowing orbs returned, rapidly looming out of the darkness, only, from the front this time.

He shielded himself instinctively, and squeezed his eyes shut.

No need for that. I won't hurt you. The voice sounded almost amused.

Levi peeked out from behind his arm. Those glowing orbs, they were eyes. Huge eyes. Each at least the size of a Clementine. Eyes that had stopped a foot or so from his face. That was alarming.

They seemed to glow brighter each passing second. They were the only thing he could make out clearly, he couldn't even see the face they were placed on.

However…now that he was this close, he could tell, they were not just teal. They were a myriad of colours, cerulean blue, jade green, and with sparks of gold.

Beautiful. He thought.

He felt a light touch on his cheek, and he could make out a giant claw tipped digit in the gloom. It was like a human finger, but too large, and webbed.

So are you. The hum rumbled in his ribcage. It permeated every pore.

No. He shook his head away from the gentle touch. No, no no. He didn't want to hear this.

The finger recoiled. Levi watched as the massive eyes blinked slowly, as if contemplating.

It makes me sad that you can't see what I see every day. The huge, scaled fish tail whipped downward, and he found himself in the arms of this creature. I've waited so long for a chance to see you like this. To meet you… even if you probably won't even remember.

He looked upwards into huge eyes. They were conflicted. Both sad, yet pleased.

Never had Levi felt so small. (That was really saying something) This creature's limbs were so powerful, it was power itself, it seemed; the hug he was enveloped in could well have been likened to a child with a doll.

What do you want from me?

The monstrous form squeezed him a bit. Bubbles erupted from his mouth. (Good thing breathing was not a thing at the moment.)

For now, just let me touch you. I waited a good while for this to work, er, well, I wasn't even sure if this WOULD work, actually.

So much for the illusion of power. The creature seemed unskilled in bringing him to this place…

A distant rumble distracted both of them momentarily.

Levi shook his head. Waited? Something needed to work…what? That didn't make any sense. Nothing in this situation did. His mind was getting clearer now, questioning everything about the circumstances around him. Waited for what to work? Who are you?

The eyes crinkled up a bit as if the face they were on was smiling. Sorry, but it looks like, you're waking up, so the answers will have to wait. I can answer you when, or if, you decide to find me. If you do it now…please, Levi, be careful; it's a bad storm.

I will. He wanted answers.

I hope so…The being released him, and with a swish of its massive tail, it disappeared in to the depths as quickly as it had appeared.

Wait! Levi reached after it, trying to swim. How do you know my-

A brilliant flash and following loud rumble had Levi sitting bolt upright and gasping for air. "What?" He looked around in wide eyed confusion for a moment. "ugh, fuck…" He felt the side of his face and it was crusted with drool and dried blood. His body was drenched in sweat.

Taylor Swift had popped up on the radio with 'Blank Space'(sigh).

…goddammit…

He fell asleep! What time was it? Levi peered over at his bedside clock. 3:40am. Taylor continued to warble about god knows what. "Gruh…" He angrily smacked the switch on the radio, effectively shutting her up.

A harsh pattering on the window and roof had him look over. Was it raining? He grabbed his piece and placed it back on the window sill. He peeked out. It was raining.

Pretty hard. Strange, since there hadn't been any indication of storms. No fierce undertow, no rough waves.

He could make out Connie and Sasha's stupid tent, sure enough, they'd put their rainguard over it. The wind whipped it this way and that, threatening to tear it off.

Wind whipped and howled through the cracks in the old shop, as well. It was loud enough to rattle him a bit, his eyes darted over his shoulder. he had to scold himself. The bathroom light still lit the room softly, casting strange shadows that seemed to warp and move the longer he looked at them. (Stop being a paranoid bitch.)

The temperature had dropped significantly, making him shiver. So that's why the storm had come, a high pressure front had decided to move in. Of course.

He looked out once more to check on Connie and Sasha. The next lightning flash told him everything he needed to know. Surprisingly, the job they had done with the rain guard was pretty good. It really didn't seem to be going anywhere, despite the storm. He wondered how his crab traps were faring.

The time had come to patiently wait for another flash to light up the pier so he could see.

In a blaze of glory, the needed lightning flash stuck right across the sound. The brillliant flash made Levi squint for a second, and then scowl. His crab trap buoys were no where to be seen.

The subsequent thunder nigh a second later made him cuss and rub his ears. "Shit, that's fucking loud..."

That strike had been a bit close for comfort.

Living on the coast for 20 years had taught him well that lightning was a force to be respected. It loved to strike twice, and it was destructive as hell. Never take chances with it, don't fuck with it, and don't go out in an electrical storm.

Nothing doing. He really needed to check those traps. Storm or not. If the buoys really had broken free from the dock, he was in deep shit. (No crabs, no food.)

He grumbled and wriggled out of his sweat pants and ambled over to his dresser, covered in goosebumps. He spotted a pair of ratty old khakis. (That'll do) without further ado, he shoved them them on. He checked his sock drawer, good. His swamp socks were right at the top. On they went.

Levi eyed his wading boots by the door of the loft. Time to get them dirty again. He slid each foot into the corresponding boot and set off down the stairs, flicking the light on in the stairwell as he went.

The shop always looked weird at night, in the dark. As if it was sleeping. Well, except for that goddamn juice machine, which continued it's obnoxious squeaky whirring.

He made his way around the various tables and merchandise before entering the doorway behind the counter. Crossing the stockroom, he set about grabbing his jacket and unlocking the back door. His fishing jacket hung on a peg, looking drab and thankfully waterproof as always. (At least it was clean) He always felt like wearing that jacket made him look like a redneck idiot, but whatever, it helped him be a dryredneck idiot. So anyone who laughed could shove it up their ass.

He flicked the one floodlight switch on the wall. And the yard and pier were lit. The term floodlight was probably not appropriate since it was not the proper type of bulb, and only managed a crappy half assed light up of the area, only barely making it to the pier.

It was times like this that Levi wished he'd had money for flashlight batteries.

With a sigh he prepared to make his way out in to the storm.

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This pretty much shows a fairly good interpretation of why mixing too much alcohol and grass can really, REALLY, send your thoughts in a bad direction.

btw, I'm not sure HOW I feel about "Elastic Heart" by Sia.
...I just know the music video made no sense to me until it was explained via the artist.
Before the explanation it was obviously a girl trying to escape the clutches of 'Actual Cannibal Shia LeBeouf'. Harhar.

Please tell me what you think and I'll love ya. (who am I kidding, I'll love you anyway even if you don't) 3