As usual I still do not own Harry Potter.

()()()

Lord Voldermort looked at Lucius Malfoy as he was giving his presentation, fortunately Lucius was a wizard so the presentation of his evil plan to obtain the Prophecy didn't include Power Point slides. Voldemort thanked whoever made wizards so ignorant for this little favor. During his musings Lucius ended and now awaited for his answer. Voldemort changed his facial expression from 'I am listening #7' to 'Evil Dark Lord #2' and issued a standard response. If purebloods were a bit smarter they would notice that he reuses his three responses every time someone proposes a plan.

"That's a brilliant plan Lucius, those fools in the Ministry will never see it coming. Now leave me alone." A chorus of 'yes master' was heard and the Death Eaters have left his throne room.

Why did he even have one? Oh right, Lucius believed a proper Dark Lord has to have one... A standard well lit room with a large conference table and chairs around it would be more welcome, but such setup was too muggle so his minions would never used it. Maybe if he made a large wood table and traditional chairs and claim it's an old pureblood tradition? That would work, his supporters aren't the brightest people around.

Voldemort went through Lucius monologue, true he didn't listen to the blond man but Voldemort still heard what he said and thanks to Occlumency he had a perfect memory recollection. After going through the entire plan Voldemort face palmed. The plan was ridiculous. Spend a year to get a simple ball from the Departament of Mysteries. Voldemort could just walk inside using polijuice or not using anything at all, after all he had a body and face of his seventeen year old self. The ugly face he kept was used to avoid both male and female Death Eaters hitting on him. Refusing Lucius advances without hurting man's pride and feelings was the most difficult piece of diplomacy he ever did.

So why not just go in and take that damn Prophecy? While he could do anything he wanted to, being a Dark Lord has it's perks, he still had to take into account his minions. A Dark Lord without minions won't go to far and his minions were very touchy on the subject how a Dark Lords should behave. He literally couldn't throw out Lucius plan without loosing his support and money. At moments like this Voldemort wondered why did he even try to take over Magical Britain. The people who he will be ruling over were idiots. Draco considered himself to be a great mastermind and planner who believed that his plans should work because he was a pureblood. He believed he should get better grades because he was a pureblood, that he should win in that stupid game everyone played because he was a pureblood. He was wrong on all occasions. His plans were pitiful, his grades were abysmal and his skills in Quidthing were nonexistent. That was the person who will take Lucius place one day, Voldemort will be there to see that as he was immortal now.

Voldemort shuddered, such a future would be more a curse than a blessing.

"Screw this, I'm out of here."

When Lucius Malfoy returned the next day he had found an empty lair with a letter lying on the throne. The letter was a short one.

'To person reading this letter

I Lord Voldemort aka You-Know-Who aka He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named aka Lord Thingy quit.

Signed

Lord Voldemort'

()()()

Surrey

()()()

'Blood wards my ass' muttered Tom Riddle as he went towards doors leading to Dursley's household. It was the third Dursley family he visited that day, Lucius spies managed to obtain that information after many unsuccessful tries. In other words, Draco overheard Potter when he spoke about his family...

The two previous Dursleys didn't have anything magical around their houses, he still spoke to them just in case but they never heard about one Harry Potter. Dursleys living on Privet Drive number four DID have wards around their home. Tom during his life as Lord Voldemort saw many wards, many weak and primitive wards. His own stronghold could withstand a magical assault for years, heck it could even survive mundane artillery barrage... for ten maybe fifteen minutes. While not very comforting it was still six to nine hundreds times better than Hogwarts wards which would fail after the very first shell hit them. Enough said that wards around Privet Drive Number Four wouldn't stop a determined Draco Malfoy... for more than a decade. Voldemorts ex-minions were really dumb.

He pushed the bell and awaited the response. After a minute a tall woman had opened the door.

"Yes?"

"Good morning ma'am. My name is Thomas Jones and I'm from Surrey Police Department." He waved his transfigured ID in front of her. "I am looking for one Harry James Potter."

"That freak, what did he do this time?"

"Does Harry Potter live here?"

"Yes, he is out. Probably committing more crimes, I just hope he doesn't corrupt our poor soon Dudley."

"Ma'am, as far as I know Mister Potter has never committed any crimes. My department was asked by the Scotland Yard to question him as a witness. Could you tell me where I can find him?"

"He probably went to the park."

Tom asked for the directions and once again assured the woman that Harry didn't commit any crimes.

When he arrived at park Tom saw Harry sitting on a bench, the boy didn't look around so Tom decided to have some fun and sat right next to him.

"You look sad kid, something bad happened?" Tom casually asked Harry.

"No it's..." At that moment Harry looked up and saw a seventeen year old Tom Riddle sitting next to him. Tom had to give a credit where is due, Harry's reflexes were astonishing, the moment he saw Tom's face Harry drew a wand and jumped back several meters keeping his wand pointed at Tom. "Voldemort." He almost hissed that name.

"No, not any longer." Tom calmly answered.

"You come here to... wait what? What do you mean not any longer?"

"I have quit Mister Potter. Many people would consider you to be my nemesis, given how many times you have foiled my plots I would have to agree with them. So I have came here to inform you, my nemesis, that I quit."

"You quit. Just like that?"

"Yes, just like that. There are no forms to fill when you quit being a Dark Lord, no higher authority or government to inform." Tom shrugged.

"Then why are you doing this? Why tell me that you quit?"

"A common courtesy?"

"And you just quit. No more killings, no more evil plots to take over the world?" Harry wasn't convinced."why would you do that?"

"Let's go with your leader's primary line 'I have seen the error of my ways and decided to repent'." Tom said mockingly. "It has worked for Snape so why nor for me?"

"You do not wish to repent, do you?"

"No, I do not think I do want to, but neither did Snape and it didn't stop Dumbledore from giving him a second chance and a nice job teaching children."

"You have killed my parents. Do you expect me to forget that?"

"Of course not, I am not going to argue that what I did was right or that I was justified to do so. I am also not going blame Dumbledore or Snape who made the attack on your parents possible. I am merely going to point out that you are one of the 'good guys' and so no killing, no revenge and no common sense. Forget the last one. Oh, and you are also underage so if you cast any spells at me the Ministry WILL expel you and bind your magic, which is an euphemism for snapping your wand but hey, it sounds cool."

"That... crap, you are right. Even if I somehow managed to defeat you nobody would believe that you are Voldemort and I would be expelled."

They sat in silence for a while.

"So... what about killing all muggleborns and muggles? Are you going to quit that too?"

"Why would I kill them? I have nothing against them, I created the whole 'muggleborns are evil' theme to gather supporters so I could take over the world."

Harry was speechless.

"It's politics. Dumbledore had his power base centered around Light families and muggleborns, taking it from him was close to impossible as those people worshiped the ground he stepped on so I had to find someone else. The Dark families had almost nothing common among them and fought amongst each other more often than not. I will spare you the details but uniting them under a single banner wasn't easy."

"So why did you quit?" Asked Harry.

"I told you, I saw the error of my ways. That part was true." Harry remained silent so Tom continued. "Do you know Draco Malfoy, Mister Potter?" Harry nodded. "Does he act like a 'cunning Slytherin' or more like a spoiled brat?"

"Spoiled brat... wait, you want to tell me it's not an elaborate rouse?"

"Nope, young Mister Malfoy is a spoiled brat. And now imagine that he would be my 'right hand' in about twenty to thirty years... His father is bad, the son?" Tom shocked his head.

"Serves you right, I guess..."

"Yes, yes. Laugh as much as you want. I should have tried to undermine Dumbledore and gather all muggleborns under my banner. With people like your mother or Miss Granger taking over the world would be easy." Said Tom.

"So... what are you going to do now?"

"I think I will go to some tropical island with a nice vacation resort and help poor young maidens in putting a lotion on their backs..."

"That is supposed to be a way to repent for your sins?"

"No, Mister Potter. That is supposed to be fun. I was never serious about the whole repentance thing, very few people are yet for some reason all Light Wizards still fall for that."

"Damn, can I switch to being a Dark Wizard? I would be able to kill you without having to worry about all that stuff."

"Really? I just announced that you can live your life in peace and you want to kill me for that? What kind of gratitude this is?"

"Well... without you my life kind of sucks. I will graduate Hogwarts, marry some witch from a Light family because people expect me to do that, become an Auror for the same reason and have a boring life with a girl I do not love, a job I do not like in a world I hate. Having to fight you would solve those problems, I could fake a heroic sacrifice to save some nameless people who would still die a week later and live in peace. Can't do that without a Dark Lord to fight against." Harry shrugged.

"I am speechless, Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Wizarding savior, defeater of Lord Voldemort wants to escape? Why are you not trying to do anything?"

"Let's see... Dumbledore keeps me from contacting anyone for his nefarious reasons, Gringotts sells their services to those who pay the most and that's not me, the Ministry is corrupt and even worse than Dumbledore and I am to cynical to believe in the stellar incorruptible reputation of Amelia Bones and DMLE. My second year thought me to not believe in what people say while the third taught me that people do not care about injustice. All I got left is going along with whatever plan Dumbledore made up and hoping I will either survive it or manage to leave without anyone noticing or wanting to come after me."

Tom considered that for a while.

"Mister Potter, would you like to become a Dark Lord? There is an opening in that position." Tom said with a serious tone.

"A Dark Lord? Me? Are you insane? Dumbledore would 'vanquish' me faster that you can say 'Avada Kedavra', or Fudge would throw me into Azkaban just for laugh. Not to mention your ex-minions, they would be a bit annoyed that someone else took your job."

"Ah... you see, the plan while insane has it's merits. All you have to do is..."

()()()

Omake 1

()()()

I never said I..." A sudden aura of darkness has interrupted him. "Dementors. Do not cast anything, I will deal with them."

Harry looked around to see two dark floating creatures incoming. He felt the cold they emanated and was going to cast his partonus if it wasn't for Tom's spells.

"Expecto Opugnarium. Expecto Opugnarium." Instead of a mist or an animal two glowing swords flew from Tom's wand and hit both Dementors in their chests. The creatures continued their approach but then harry noticed that there is dust falling down from their capes, after a couple seconds all that was left from the Dementors were their black capes and a two small piles of dust.

"thank you for saving my life, now I will get expelled for casting some weird patronus and destroying two Dementors."

"Don't be ridiculous Mister Potter, my wand is untraceable. No one in the Ministry will know what happened here, not unless you tell them of course."

()()()

Omake 2

()()()

"Fine. By the way, why did you quit?"

"From the last four years I have spent two of them personally at Hogwarts and for two more my loyal ex-minions have provided me with all the information I needed. This knowledge allowed me to make several interesting observations."

"Like what?"

"Well, the first DADA lesson where I taught your friend Miss Granger and Draco Malfoy. Rather than a proud pureblood heir I saw an idiot. This was supposed to be my future right hand? I knew Draco's grand and great grandfather and if they saw how their heir acts they would disown him faster than you can say 'you are a pathetic wanker'. Other children from families of my supporters weren't much better. To put it simply - I have quit because I do not want to deal with idiots."

"Poor Draco, when he hears that his idol abandoned him his all dreams will be shattered." Harry almost laughed. "What about me? What I am supposed to do now?"

"I don't know. Become a Dark Lord and conquer the Britain? There is an opening for that position."

"Right, all hail Dark Lord uhm... do I have to create an anagram of my name?"

"No, I did that because it sounded cool. Feel free to use anything you want, but check earlier if the name wasn't used already. There was over twenty Dark Lord in Britain that I know about."

"All hail Dark Lord Dreadnaughtius the Nice!" Both males laughed at that. "Well, it would be an interesting thing to do, my own harem, not having to deal with Dursleys, being able to curse Malfoy whenever I want and... having to fight for my life against magical army and Dumbledore. I wouldn't last a week."

"Hmm... with your Miss Granger help you could actually win." Said Tom while thinking about something.

"Sure I would, Dumbledore would defeat me the moment I declared myself a Dark Lord."

"No... he could not do that, as a Headmaster he cannot challenge or attack his students as long as they do not endanger other people or break any rules. Being a Dark Lord in not against Hogwarts rules. Also there is no magical army and the Ministry would not be able to arrest you as being a Dark Lord is not illegal by itself, it's the things many Dark Lords do that are illegal."