Hinata woke to the sound of a muffled voice and turned over in his sleep. For a moment, he thought the noise was coming from his dream, and stayed caught in the folds of his subconscious, unwilling to relinquish the fantasy of playing volleyball on stilts. When the sound continued, he sat up reluctantly, rubbing crust from his eyes. Kageyama was talking in his sleep. Hinata looked at the clock. 1:57 a.m.
"Kageyama…?" he whispered groggily.
"N-no, please… don't…" The raw despair in the words made Hinata alert at once.
"Hey," he whispered again, "Kageyama, wake up."
"Mom… don't go, don't leave…"
Hinata climbed precariously from the top bunk—not that he needed to. Kageyama's tossing and turning caused any other movements to go unnoticed. Hinata padded to the side of the bottom bunk and swallowed at the sight of Kageyama. Hinata had never seen him wear that kind of expression before. Drenched in sweat, he looked as if he were the only person left in the world. It drew Hinata closer to the bed and tugged at his heart. I guess even an asshole like him can hurt.
"Where did everyone go?" Kageyama's voice was raspy and choked. With that last line, the boy was ripped from sleep and he sat up violently in bed, panting. When he saw Hinata standing over him, he jumped.
"What the—what are you doing?" he growled, trying to mold his expression back into its usual glare. Hinata could see from a hint of moonlight that Kageyama was fighting tears.
"You were talking in your sleep and it sounded like a nightmare… I thought I should try and wake you up." Hinata scratched the back of his head, feeling sheepish.
"Go back to bed." Kageyama rubbed his eyes, his voice still hoarse from the dream.
"Can I do anything to help? T-talk, or—"
"Get the fuck away from me." Kageyama lay back down and turned on his side, facing the wall. Hinata flinched, but he couldn't get angry. Not after what he just saw. Kageyama's heavy breathing made Hinata hesitate, but the squinty-eyed bastard stayed silent. Hinata frowned and slipped into the bathroom, turning on the tap. Kageyama's ears pricked at the noise and he sighed, curling into a tighter ball. Why him, of all people? What did he hear? He looked at his hand, which was shaking. The dream had been particularly bad, as they usually were when his mother was involved. But the image that had startled him awake was one of an empty court.
He didn't want to talk about those things.
Kageyama heard footsteps draw closer to the edge of his bed again, so he pretended to be asleep. Hinata set something down on his nightstand, hovered for a moment, and then climbed up into his own bunk. Kageyama didn't dare to glance at what it was until a few minutes had passed.
It was a glass of water.
His heart clenched and he sat up. Sleep would be impossible now, with Hinata's accidental intrusion, sudden kindness, and the lingering terrors of the dream. Kageyama's head was spinning.
He grabbed the glass of water and chugged, making no attempt to silence his greedy gulps. It was the only "thank you" he would allow. He set the glass down and ran a hand through his damp hair, letting a heavy stream of breath out through his nose. Though he was a private person, so much had happened in the past few days that Kageyama didn't think Hinata could be avoided. Living with the ball of energy was proving to be a challenge, testing his patience and emotions every minute of every day. This was just another example of Hinata witnessing a part of him that he'd wanted to keep buried. Without realizing it, Kageyama found himself rewinding through the memories of the past few days, events that followed Daichi kicking them off the court…
"If I had to play with Hinata as he is now… whether it's receiving, tossing, or spiking, I'd rather do it myself than with him!"
These were the words that started the whole mess, among others: idiot, useless, dumbass, helpless, inept, etc. The pushing and shoving hadn't helped, either. After Kageyama's display of stubbornness, there was no way for the two of them to join the team until some kind agreement had been reached. I can't play until they see I'm civil with him. Whether or not I view him as a teammate is irrelevant.
Kageyama gritted his teeth and glared at the ground. "Dammit! I have the potential to make them all better! Why can't they see that?"
Hinata, who'd been clinging to the windowsill to peer into the gymnasium, jumped to the ground with raised eyebrows. "Isn't that kind of cocky to say?"
Kageyama ignored him, mostly because he didn't think it was. "Let's challenge them to a 2-on-2 match on the condition that if we win, they'll let us join. You're annoying, but it's the fastest way to get back on the team."
"Are you sure we can do that? They are upperclassmen."
"We can. Because I'm here."
It was Hinata's turn to glare. "Why are you even at Karasuno? There are other schools with a better chance at earning a championship title."
Kageyama grimaced. "As far as the number one school in the prefecture… I didn't get in."
Hinata looked at him, all of his feelings conveyed through one solid stare. Then why are you looking down on me?
Kageyama turned away, annoyed. "Just try not to hold me back."
Hinata looked at the doors of the gym, the sounds of volleyball echoing from inside. "The only game I every played was against you," he said, suddenly calm from the nostalgia. "Before then, we didn't even have enough players to enter a tournament. I had to practice in the halls of my Jr. High. When I finally stood on that official court, my heart was like… 'Guaww!'"
Guaww…? Kageyama turned to face the idiot who could actually say that without a hint of embarrassment. Hinata's passionate expression caught him off guard.
"That game only lasted thirty minutes."
Kageyama closed his eyes, losing his patience. "Only strong players can remain on the court." Hinata nodded in agreement, his eyes glowing with excitement.
"If it means I get to stay on the court longer, I can definitely play volleyball with you."
The intensity of Hinata's stare made Kageyama feel flustered. "Th—that's my line, asshole!" Kageyama yelled.
The two of them made their proposition to Daichi and a 3-on-3 match was settled, first-years vs. first-years. In fighting for his approval, Hinata began to change Kageyama in the days leading up to the practice match.
"WHERE DID YOUR SERVE AND RECEIVE REFLEXES FROM YESTERDAY GO?!" Kageyama bellowed.
"If all we do is practice passing, I won't have time to learn to spike your tosses!" Hinata whined. He was on the ground, panting. He thought he could ignore Kageyama's personality as long as he was practicing on a real court, as long as he had a setter. But Kageyama refused to toss to him.
"Go jump somewhere else," Kageyama growled.
The two of them had been practicing every morning at 5 a.m., courtesy of Tanaka. The second-year had been letting the boys into the gym with a spare key, even joining their practices, as he was the addition to their team of three. Sugawara was interested in their progress as well, and came to join the excitement every morning. All this was a complete secret from Daichi, who didn't seem too happy with Hinata and Kageyama since their disagreement in the gym.
Tanaka was the only one spiking during practice, the only person Kageyama would toss to.
"Why won't you let me try?" Hinata begged. "Just one toss! You like tossing, so send me one! I wanna spike like Tanaka."
"No."
"Why? Stingy!"
"You have to be able to receive the toss to attack. Right now you're too slow at receiving, so I'll be tossing to Tanaka during our 3-on-3. Just do your best not to slow us down."
Hinata looked at him, suddenly serious. His emotions bounced all over the place, as erratic as the volleyball with which they were practicing. It exhausted Kageyama.
"If I receive in a way that's up to your standards, will you toss to me?"
Kageyama huffed. "If it's someone who's essential to winning, I'll always toss to them. But I've never considered you essential to winning."
It was the kind of statement that made Tanaka and Sugawara look at each other, sharing pity for Hinata. Hinata didn't look defeated, however—he just looked hurt and angry. He continued trying to receive, even though it was the kind of skill that took years of practice to master, not days.
If he didn't suck so much, I would admire his dedication, Kageyama thought. Practice continued on as it had, the tense atmosphere between Kageyama and Hinata unyielding.
School had begun, and to his irritation, Kageyama found that he and Hinata were in many of the same remedial classes.
Why does he have to be just as stupid in school as he is on the court? Kageyama thought, finding that when they weren't practicing, they were bickering about everything from volleyball to school work, dawn to dusk. Kageyama couldn't really complain, however, because where he struggled in math, Hinata could muddle through the numbers, and he found himself helping the pest with English, a subject that he himself didn't entirely suck at. As for the rest of their classes, both of them sat dazed at their desks, baffled by their assignments.
Kageyama still wouldn't toss to Hinata. It had gotten to the point where even Sugawara felt the need to intervene, which is exactly what he did when he found Hinata practicing through his lunch break instead of eating with his classmates.
Kageyama, purchasing milk form a nearby vending machine, stumbled upon the two and paused to eavesdrop, sipping his drink.
"How about I toss to you tomorrow morning, Hinata?"
Hinata stopped bouncing the ball around and turned to his teammate, eyes shining. "Really?!"
"I am the team's official setter. It will give you a chance to practice spiking."
"Sure! Ah, but…" Hinata's face fell and Sugawara looked confused.
"What is it?"
"It feels like if I let you toss to me, Kageyama will have won. Or something like that."
Hinata looked irritated, almost embarrassed that Kageyama was on his mind. From behind the vending machine, Kageyama himself raised his eyebrows.
"Why are you so competitive with Kageyama?"
"When I met him in Jr. High, he was better at volleyball in every way. He's really strong… a notch above me, in a place I can't seem to reach. When I see him play, I get pissed off because I want to be better than he is. I came to Karasuno to beat him, but…"
"So you play volleyball to defeat him?"
"I… want to be as good as him, so I can play anyone on equal footing. I don't want to lose anymore."
Kageyama mindlessly crushed his milk carton at those words, deep in thought.
"In your mind, he's the strongest player?"
Hinata screwed up his face and frowned, clearly upset. "Y-yeah."
Kageyama smiled.
"Well, I guess you have to stop thinking of him in terms of 'Kageyama is my strongest enemy.' Because now he's your 'strongest ally,' right?"
Hinata turned the words over in his head, nodding slowly. "I want him to toss to me. I want him to think of me as 'essential to winning.'" Hinata's forehead had creased, but after saying those words, he slapped his cheeks, catching Sugawara off guard. "Being down about it won't do anything. Let's keep practicing!"
"But… the bell just rang for class."
Sugawara and Hinata both laughed, sheepishly dispersing and waving goodbye. Kageyama stood where he was, pondering Hinata's praise.
"How long have they been at it?"
Tanaka had just strolled into the gym at 5:30 a.m. the next morning to see Hinata and Kageyama passing. Kageyama was hitting his incredible serves to give Hinata a chance to receive.
"They've been at it fifteen minutes straight," Sugawara said, watching from the sidelines. "The ball hasn't hit the ground yet." Tanaka gave a low whistle.
"They're ridiculous," he murmured. He watched for a bit. "It seems Hinata is using his speed to his advantage, even though he still has poor form for receives."
"STOP GOING EASY ON ME!" Hinata yelled to Kageyama, who had, up until that point, been holding back on his serves.
"Tch." What a noisy brat, Kageyama thought. Always irritating him about spiking, about school, about becoming "essential to winning." Kageyama didn't know why he was so aggravated with Hinata, but he let out the frustration by serving a ball impossible to receive.
Shit, he thought.
"What a rotten kid," Tanaka mumbled.
"Wait." Sugawara was watching Hinata intensely, watching those amber eyes follow the ball. Hinata's primal reaction piqued Sugawara's interest. "Hinata's best quality is his determination."
Hinata went for the ball in a blaze of motion. The sprint alone was an unbelievable pace, his dive completely primal. Hinata flew forward to get his wrist under the serve, across the court in seconds despite his pained expression. With his limbs working like a machine, Hinata's skin slipped under the ball and returned it, his body taut as he slid on his stomach a few feet before stopping. Kageyama stood, watching intently, wondering why his heart was pounding, why he felt angry and confused and excited.
He doesn't give up. Even if he's in pain, which he clearly is, he takes another step, faster than the first. This is only practice, and yet… why does he sacrifice so much for the ball? And why does it piss me off?
"His power to overcome a disadvantageous physique and poor set of technical skills is what makes Hinata the ultimate weapon," Sugawara said with a smile.
Kageyama's eyes watched the ball that flew towards him, memories flashing through his head as it sailed closer and closer.
Even when his team was losing 24 to 1, he kept going, because "they hadn't lost yet."
"I… want to be as good as him, so I can play anyone on equal footing. I don't want to lose anymore."
"Just one toss! You like tossing, so send me one!"
Kageyama took a deep breath and settled his heart. He understood why he was irritated with Hinata's passion, the determination, the stubbornness. It mirrored his own.
Kageyama took the ball in both hands and tossed it.
"Does Hinata even have any strength left to get that?" Tanaka asked.
Sugawara gave him an uncertain glance.
It was only Kageyama who knew without a doubt that Hinata would get to his feet.
Hinata saw Kageyama's toss and his eyes ignited with complete and utter bliss. The smile that broke out across his face was so wide it took even Kageyama by surprise. His breathing steadied and he ran for the ball, sneakers squeaking on the gym floor. Kageyama looked on as Hinata jumped, sailing through the air with grace, his shirt rising above his midriff as he reached his highest peak. Hinata spiked the ball in a blaze of speed, grinning from ear to ear. At the sight of the complete and utter joy in Hinata's smile, something opened in Kageyama's chest that he didn't quite understand. He wouldn't be able to look at Hinata the same way again, his breath stolen from the precision in Hinata's movements. Whenever he told the squirt that he sucked at volleyball, he would remember this moment and know he was lying.
The spike slammed into floor on the opposite side of the net with a satisfying smack and Hinata hit the floor, on his knees. He looked up at Kageyama with a disgusting amount of adoration. "I spiked it! I spiked it!"
Kageyama nodded. He paused, and Hinata's smile faded from the force of Kageyama's serious look. "On Saturday… let's win it."
Sugawara smiled at the moment. Daichi, I think I understand. Getting them to respect one another was the first step in making them unstoppable. Hinata finally has a teammate that will help him grow, and it seems he won't let Kageyama revert to his selfish attitude.
Tanaka was confused. "Wasn't that just a regular toss? Why is the shrimp so happy?"
Hinata grinned, looking up at his "strongest ally."
Then he clenched his stomach and puked all over the gym floor.
These memories spun in Kageyama's head as he sat in the darkness of their room, listening to Hinata's breathing, now steady as the boy slipped into sleep. Kageyama drew his arms around his knees, pressing his cheek into his leg and sighing, his eyes still swollen from the dream, his sweat cooling on his back.
There were some things he didn't want tangerine-head to see, and Kageyama still didn't trust Hinata's volleyball techniques at all—only the idiot's determination and speed. Just because they were roommates didn't mean they were friends.
But one thing Kageyama knew for certain—Hinata was already changing him, and it was terrifying as hell.