Living without you is like TV in black and white,

You turn me on and brought color into my life,

When I'm around you, suddenly I realize,

That I was blind before I saw the world through your eyes

Chapter 4: My Married Boyfriend

Sam was lying in bed, Dean's bed, while the said man was still sleeping. He asked his mom, if he could spend the night at Danny's place. She seemed a little reluctant; but she eventually said yes. Sam was looking out of the bedroom window, watching the rain. He remembered the day he first met Dean in that bar. It was raining that afternoon, quite strongly. Everything was wet and the smell of wet concrete was everywhere-logically, of course, since it is New York, the concrete jungle.

He looked at Dean. His chest was slowly rising and falling. His expression looked so soft. Sam was pretty sure that Dean was even more beautiful when he was asleep. If that's even possible.

"Pssst."

"Dean..." Sam said softly, placing a hand on Dean's chest, shaking him gently. "Dean, wake up."

He felt a little guilty for trying to wake him up. He knew how much Dean loved to sleep. "Dean!" he said, this time slightly louder, shaking him slightly stronger.

"Not the pie!" Dean shouted as he sat up. He looked at Sam and realized that he woke him up.

"I see you're awake" Sam said, blushing slightly due to the obvious fact that he woke Dean up.

Dean groaned and threw his head back onto the pillow. He covered himself with the sheets all up to his neck. "What is it?"

"Listen" Sam said, almost whispered.

Dean moved his eyes left and then right, trying to find something to focus his hearing on. "What are we listening to?" he asked in a whisper.

"The rain."

Next thing Sam knew he was lying on the cold, hard ground. Dean pushed him off. "Hey!"

"You woke me up to listen to rain?!" Dean asked sending Sam a death glare.

Sam climbed back into bed, snuggling into Dean. He intertwined their legs, his head resting on Dean's chest. "I love listening to rain."

"So you thought I'd like to listen to it, too" Dean said looking at the clock on his nightstand, "At 2:13 AM."

"Sorry..." Sam apologized, feeling bad about waking Dean up.

Dean sighed. He put his arms tightly around Sam, "It's okay."

"It's just" Sam started, "it was raining in the afternoon of the day we first met" he explained with a soft smile.

Dean chuckled. "You are such a hopeless romantic, Samantha."

Sam hit Dean in the stomach with his palm, earning a cry from the older male. "Point taken..." he cried.

Sam came home the same day in the afternoon. He walked into the kitchen and saw his mom preparing lunch. "Hey" he said with a smile.

"Hi..." Ashley answered back with a smile as well, although hers was weak.

"What'ch you making?" Sam asked, stepping behind his mother and looking past her shoulder, which wasn't hard as he was quite taller than her.

"Wiener Schnitzel and French fries."

"Great!" Sam grinned and sat down at the table, pulling out his phone.

"How was your stay at Danny's?" his mother eventually asked. Ashley was 99.9% sure that Sam wasn't at Danny's place; he was definitely at that other guy's place. He never saw him before, and she was worried to death about letting Sam go, but she had a little plan. She called Danny after Sam had already left and asked him about Sam. He said he didn't know anything, as they haven't spoken in months.

"It was okay..." Sam lied.

"Where were you really?" Ashley asked, turning around so that she was facing Sam. She was resting her hands behind her on the counter.

"What...?" Sam's heart started beating like crazy.

"I know you weren't at Danny's place, Sam, I called him. Where were you really? And with who?" she asked, crossing her arms.

"I... I was at Sandy's... I told you about her once." Sam couldn't tell his mom about Dean. And even if the motherly part of her would somehow understand, the lawyer part would make sure Dean never got a job on the West Coast ever again.

"Oh..." Ashley still wasn't believing Sam. She could smell a lie a mile away. Especially her son's. "Why didn't you tell me you were going to her place?"

"Because... I don't know..." God Sam wanted to just throw himself under a train in that moment. His lying way getting bigger and worse by the minute. "I'm sorry..."

"I will forgive you, but only if you promise me to never do something like this again. Next time you're telling the truth."

"Okay... I promise..."

Ashley stepped out of her office and was greeted by the sigh of Donna Lakers, one of her coworkers and good friends. "Here you go" the woman said and handed Ashley a cup of coffee.

"You know when I need before even I know" Ashley chuckled.

"How are you?"

"I'm good. I'm about to meet a client. He's divorcing his wife" she said and rolled her eyes. "They both got married when they finished high school. And after 4 years, they're getting a divorce. Imagine that. These kids today..."

"What got up your behind?" Donna asked with a chuckle.

Ashley looked at Donna. She wanted to tell Donna about what she saw that morning, but she couldn't. She wasn't even sure what was going on herself. She needed proof first.

While Ashley and Donna were chatting, the elevator down the hall stopped and the doors opened. Out came a young man, short and spiky brown hair and green eyes. He was wearing a leather jacket, some older looking jeans and a pair of worn out boots. He was holding a big yellowy-orange envelope in one of his hands. He walked up to the women. "Ashley Remington?"

Donna and Ashley both looked at him and Ashley coughed on her coffee. "Oh my God!"

"Girl, you okay?" Donna asked her friend.

"I... It was hot..." Ashley lied. She looked at the man and almost fainted. That was the man she saw kissing Sam! "And you are?"

"Dean Winchester."

"Oh..." 'OH!' "You're the one that's divorcing his wife!"

"Yup" Dean said, his lips forming into a thin line.

"Um... Come into my office" she said and opened the door. "I'll see you later, Donna."

The two entered Ashley's office. Ashley sat down at her desk and gestures Dean to sit on the chair across hers.

"So... Dean... Let's get started" Ashley said with a fake smile.

Ashley came home late in the night. Sam was already asleep. She quickly checked up on him, making sure that he was in his bed.

She walked downstairs into the kitchen and sat down at the table. She was still processing what she learned about Dean Winchester today. The man she was pretty sure her son was seeing. God, even thinking that have her a headache. And it wasn't the fact that her son was seeing another guy. No, she had accepted Sam's sexuality since the beginning. It was the fact that Dean Winchester was 22 and married!

Suddenly, Ashley got an idea. She picked up her purse and took out Dean's file. She opened the folder and scattered the papers on the table, making it look like she was up all night looking at them. 'I'm doing this for you, Sammy.'

Sam had just woken up. He walked downstairs into the kitchen. His mom was apparently still asleep, as she wasn't there. He prepared himself his favorite cereal and walked over to the table. He was chewing his cereal when suddenly something caught his attention. There were a bunch of files on the table. He quickly peeked at them and hurriedly scanned his eyes over them. Suddenly his mouth dropped open and his bowl fell from his hand. It landed on the floor and scattered into a hundred pieces, the milk and cereal splattered all around. Sam picked up the papers with shaking hands. 'Dean Winchester... Born January 24th, 1991... Sex: MALE... Marital status: Married...'

"Wh-what?" Sam's whole body was shaking. He couldn't believe what he was reading. Was this really his Dean? Maybe it was another Dean Winchester? But the date of birth and everything else matched. Sam was getting tears in his eyes when he looked down. He saw the broken bowl and cursed. "Shit!" He kneeled down and started picking up the broken pieces. His eyes were getting wetter and wetter, until tears finally started flowing down his cheeks. He was holding back sobs and hiccups. "Shit... Shit... Shit!" He kept cursing until he finally started sobbing out loud.

Unaware to Sam, Ashley was standing back on the staircase, listening to her son's cries. Her hand was covering her mouth, as she was barely keeping herself from crying. "I'm sorry, Sam..." she whispered.

Dean was picking up some stuff in his living room when he heard a loud and strong knock on the door. He raised an eyebrow. Who could that be? "I'm coming!" he shouted and put the stuff on the couch. He walked to the door and opened it. He was greeted by the sight of an upset looking Sam, holding some papers in his hand. "Sammy?"

Sam didn't say a word. He just marched into the apartment and turned to Dean. His eyes were still slightly red, indicating that he'd been crying.

"Sam, are you okay?" Dean asked.

"No really" Sam said, almost shouted. He threw the papers on the table and crossed his arms. "Care explaining?" He was barely keeping himself from crying.

Dean looked at the papers and sighed. He was gonna have a lot of explaining to do. "Sammy..."

"Don't call me that! I hate that stupid nickname! I would rather hear an explanation!"

Dean sat down and sighed. He thought about lying to Sam, making up some lame excuse. But this was Sammy. His Sammy. He couldn't lie to him. Which was ironic, since he already had. "Um... Take a seat, Sam."

Sam didn't sit down. He just stood there, arms still crossed. Waiting for an explanation.

"Okay, you can stand..." Dean rubbed his eyes with his palms. "Um... I..."

"Today, please, Dean!"

Dean closed his eyes. Normally he wouldn't take such an attitude from just anyone. But he felt like he deserved to be yelled at. Sam had every right to be mad at him. "My parents and I... We had a tough relationship. They thought... They thought I would do anything they said... They wanted me to become a doctor" Dean laughed, he would be a suit doctor. "I wanted to be a gym teacher... And after I told them that, they said they wouldn't be paying for college..." Dean sighed, trying to calm down; remembering that period of time in his life always made him nervous. "So... I went out for a drink to this bar, I needed some time to think about what I could do."

Sam was still carefully listening to Dean.

"So... Then I met this girl... She wasn't exactly a super model, but she wasn't that wrong either. And it turned out that she had a rich father..."

Sam tensed up, knowing where this was going.

"She told me that she used to be kinda fat and ugly when she was younger, and that boys never acknowledged her... I kinda felt sorry for her, she was a good person... Um... So, yeah... She had a lot of money and some self-esteem issues... And I needed money..."

"Dean... You didn't..." Sam started, eyes wide open.

"Yeah, Sam... I did... I married her for the money..."

Sam took a step back, the look of disappointment and anger in his eyes.

"Sam..." Dean stood up and took a step closer.

"No! Stay back! Take one step closer, and I swear to God you will never see me again!"

Dean didn't believe Sam was actually capable of doing that, but he didn't want to risk it. He already made enough dumb decisions in his life.

"I'm trying to make things right... I'm divorcing her, I told her the truth..."

"What did she say?" Sam asked, eyeing Dean, making sure he wouldn't take any steps closer.

"She was upset at first... But she forgave me. She said we both got married for ulterior motives. She wanted a guy, I wanted cash..."

"But... You're gay... How did you sleep with her?"

"About that..." Dean coughed.

"No" Sam's shoulders sunk. He looked like his puppy just died. "You're bisexual?"

Dean nodded, his hands buried deep in his pockets. He couldn't even look at Sam.

"I... Unbelievable" Sam laughed. "Anything else I should know? Is your name even really Dean? Were you born a female and transitioned into a dude?!"

"No!" Dean shouted, slightly hurt. "You really think the worst of me, don't you?"

"I'm sorry, but it's not every day that you find out you're sleeping with a married guy, who you thought was gay, but is also actually bisexual!"

"Okay, I know you're upset but-"

"No but! How could you do this to me? I trusted you! You were my first!" Tears were already flowing down Sam's cheeks, but he didn't care. It felt good to let it all out, including the tears.

"Sam! Please..." Dean was on the verge of tears himself. "I didn't wanna tell you because I knew this would happen..."

"Oh, so you were just going to lie to me the whole time? You would never once tell me?!"

"Maybe! I... I don't know..." Dean sat down at the table and covered his face with his hands. He took a deep breath and exhaled. "Sam... Please... Don't be angry... I... I love you..."

Sam walked over to the table and sat down opposite of Dean. "I don't know if I believe you anymore..."

"What? No... No, no, no" Dean kept saying. "Sam, please, you gotta believe me! I really love you! I swear! I'm divorcing the woman! I'm with you!"

Sam looked at the ground. All of this was giving him a headache. "I... I don't know... How can I be sure, Dean? That you're not just using me for my money?"

"When have I ever asked you for money, Sam? Never. And I don't intend to. I have a job, I can support myself now."

Sam shook his head. "I..." he stood up. "I need to think about all of this..." He stood up and took the papers. He was now walking to the front door. He stopped for a second and then continued. He left without another word.

"Goddamn it!" Dean screamed and threw one of the glasses on the table across the room against a wall. It shattered into a billion small pieces.

Sam slowly walked through the entrance door and closed it. His mother came out of the kitchen looking distressed. "Where have you even?! And why did you take my papers? Need I remind you, Sam, that it's illegal to go through such papers?"

Sam handed his mom the papers and have her a glare. "Have your stupid papers..." He then stormed upstairs.

Ashley sighed. She knew he and Dean had an argument. And it didn't end well. You could read it on his face.

Ashley entered Sam's room and found him lying in bed, covered up to his neck with his duvet and sheets. She could hear quiet sobs and hiccups.

She walked over and sat next to him on the bed. "Wanna tell me what's wrong?"

"Go away" Sam said with a shaky voice.

"Sam... I am not leaving your room until you tell me what's wrong... You should know me better than that" she smiled.

She didn't get a reply, though. So she decided a different road. "Why did you take my papers, honey?"

Still no answer.

"Sam..." she put his hand on him, "I promise I won't get mad... No matter what... I mean it..."

Sam stirred a little until he finally spoke up. "You'll get mad... I know it..."

"I won't, baby, I promise... Those papers were about a man named Dean Winchester... Do you know him, Sam?"

Sam just shrugged.

"Sam." Her voice was more serious this time.

"Yes..." Sam's voice was very quiet. It was almost as if he whispered.

Sam now turned around so that he was facing Ashley. "Mom... Promise me you won't get mad..."

"I won't" she smiled.

"Promise?"

"Promise!"

Sam looked around a little until he finally spoke up. "Me and... Me and Dean... We... We've been seeing each other... Every now and then..."

"I see... And in what world did you think it was okay to see a married man?"

"I didn't know he was married! Not until I saw your papers downstairs... And something snapped in me and I had to go talk to him, sort this out... I... I love him, mom... I really do... And he loves me back..."

Ashley was shocked to say at least. She knew there was something between Dean and Sam, but she didn't there was actual love between them.

"At least I thought he loved me... He lied to me... And I don't think I can forgive him for that..."

Ashley was pretty sure Karma was messing with her; she came between Sam and Dean, and now she was feeling guilty as hell. She never wanted to make her son sad; that is the last thing a mother wants. She just wanted to protect her Sammy. He was seeing a 22 year old, for crying out loud. He was much too young for that.

"Sam... We all have secrets. Stuff we don't want other people to know about. I'm pretty sure you haven't told Dean everything about yourself either."

Sam huffed. "I hate it when you're right."

Ashley chuckled. "Look... I... I'm not gonna say I'm too happy about this... Relationship, but... I know you are smart enough to know what you are doing."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I'm okay with you seeing Dean. So get your butt out of bed and go talk to him, for Christ's sake."

"Mom, did you not hear a thing I said? He lied to me."

Ashley glared at him. "Fine, then I guess I'll have to talk to him. I'll invite him over for dinner."

"What? No!" Sam practically jumped out of bed. "I'll talk to him!" he said and ran out of the door.

Ashley rested her hands on her hips, proud of herself.

Sam was sitting out in back yard on a bench, looking at his phone. He eventually dialed Dean's number and put the device next to his ear. It rang a few times before Dean picked up.

"What do you want? What did you find out about me now?" Dean's tone was cold and slightly bitter. Sam bit his lip, he knew Dean had every right to be mad.

"I... I wanted to apologize for earlier..."

Silence.

Sam continued, "I know I overreacted a little, but you have to cut me some slack, I found out some big things..."

Dean still wasn't saying anything.

Sam sighed. "I'm sorry and I really hope you forgive me. You had every right to not tell me, it's your life..."

There was silence again. Sam was growing tired of Dean not answering him. He was about to say something, when the older male spoke up, "Thanks."

"For what?"

"For, uh, apologizing and everything."

Sam smiled. "You're welcome."

"So what now?" Sam eventually asked.

"Hm?"

"What happens now? Are we done, or are you willing to put this all behind us?"

Dean chuckled. "Well, I'd be very sad if it was over. So I'm hoping it's not."

Sam grinned. "Then it's definitely not."

There was some more silence after. But it wasn't awkward silence; they both needed to process it a little.

"Hey, Dean."

"What?"

"I don't hate my nickname... As long as you're only one saying it."

Dean smiled on the other side. He felt sorta proud of himself; he was the only person who could call him Sammy. His Sammy.

"Listen, I gotta go now" said Dean, "text me, okay?"

"I will."

"'Kay. Bye, boyfriend."

There was a beep, signaling the end of a call, and Sam was grinning. Hard. Boyfriend. Dean just called him boyfriend. His boyfriend.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! And please review! I love writing this story, but I'm getting very little feedback. I'm really grateful for it, but I wish there was more; I don't want this story to go unnoticed.

Electra Heartbreaker, xoxo