Chapter Three-On the Way
Aware of Emma's frustration Killian was trying hard to quell his own rage to comfort her. Reaching the docks he took a deep breath, focusing on the sound and motion of the ocean. Slowly he felt himself calm, the ocean working its familiar magic on him. Once he felt sufficiently in control he reached into his pocket to pull out the small enchanted shell Ursula had given him the last time they parted. Somehow, during their talk the night she left they had begun to regain the friendship they had started, and he had ruined, so long ago. Having given into her own Darkness and made bad decisions in her rage she had been able to understand his actions so long ago. She did not approve of them but she had forgiven him. Uneasily he twisted the shell in his hand. He was half afraid to find out if his crossing realms idea would work. Finding Merlin would not do them any good if they could not get to him.
Pushing the Darkness back as far as possible he lifted the shell and blew into it. After fifteen minutes when there was no answer he started heading back toward the Jolly. She had warned him that it might take her some time to arrive, but that she would come when she was able. She would know where to find him when she arrived. In the back of his mind he could feel Emma's frustration but also knew she was working on calming herself down so did not need to hurry back to her.
"I was not expecting to hear from you so soon."
The voice and a small splash caused him to look down to see Ursula surfaced near the dock.
Eyes widening Ursula scrambled out of the water, tentacles immediately turning into legs. "Killian?"
He smiled sadly at her. "You can see it?" His voice did not imply the question his words did.
The Sea Witch nodded warily, cautiously taking a step forward. "What happened?"
"Rumplestiltskin's heart was almost dead. If it had been allowed to completely blacken the Darkness would no longer have been tethered to a person but have free reign over a vessel."
She almost fell backward in her shock. "That is a horrifying thought."
A quick nod was Killian's reply. "The vessel we tried to move it to was not strong enough to contain it. It broke free and was free floating."
This time Ursula did stagger and only Killian's quick grab kept her on her feet. "The destruction that could have caused." Her voice was awed. "And if it had managed to get out of Storybrooke-"she left the idea hanging.
Slowly Killian nodded. "Emma took the Dagger to tether the Darkness to her. I-I couldn't let her do it, or failing that, go into the Darkness alone. Now we share the Darkness until we can find a way to remove it without letting it free or allow it another vessel."
"How?" She led him over to a bench, feeling the need to sit.
He sat down next to her, staring out at the ocean. "We need to find the Sorcerer, Merlin. He was the one who originally tethered the Darkness to a person to be controlled by the Dagger."
"You need to get to Camelot."
"Aye, but first we have to find it."
Her eyes met his, searching. "I know where it is but you need a way to cross realms."
He shifted slightly, uncomfortably. "I had an idea. I thought that you might be able to help us." Nervously he scratched behind his ear. "You were able to bring the Jolly Roger to this realm, even when we thought it was still full size."
Ursula just looked at him. "I am not opposed but I can only open portals underwater."
"What about the Jolly? Emma and I may be able to protect a cabin enough to get through safely. Or this realm has something called scuba gear that can be used to breathe underwater."
For a few moments Ursula was silent, searching his eyes. "I should be able to do that. When do you want to leave?"
"I have to check with the others, but most likely a couple of days. The sooner the Darkness is confined the better off we will all be."
"Just let me know." She laid a hand over his. "Call me if you need anything."
His smile was tired. "Thank you." Once she was gone he rose, reaching out to check where Emma was. He did not want to deal with the Charmings or any continued research this day. He was feeling increasingly off and was not sure how to get back on an even keel. The ocean was not having its usual soothing effect on him. Thankfully Emma was preoccupied and not with her parents.
Closing his eyes he wondered where he could go to burn out this almost uncontrollable energy. A sensation of swirling filled him and he opened his eyes to see the last of a dark gray, midnight blue tinged smoke dissipating. He was in a clearing, turning around he saw the ice cream truck. Anger and frustration and remembered pain nearly overcame him. Pushing his arms out he felt force leaving him, directed at the abandoned truck. It flipped over several times, crashing into the trees before completely disintegrating. Tiredness came over him and he dropped to a sitting position, staring at where the truck had been in disbelief. He could feel the Dark Power coursing under his skin, stronger than he had felt it before, but the festering frustration and ire seemed to have disappeared.
"Killian?"
He was not surprised to hear Emma's quiet voice or to feel her slide into his lap, wrapping her arms around him. Tiredly he dropped his head to rest on hers, clinging tightly. She was the only one he had felt free to let his guard down with in centuries. He had no words, just swirling emotions, the Darkness trying to overwhelm his iron control, which was feeling remarkably fragile at the moment. Keeping his eyes closed he focused on regaining his usual control. When he let his emotions have free rein he made bad decisions. He did not want to become that man again.
"I'm here," Emma whispered. "You are not alone. We will not let the Darkness win."
Finally feeling the Darkness recede to its usual watching state Killian lifted his head. "If we can protect the Jolly's passengers Ursula can take us to Camelot."
Her eyes searched his. "How about you tell me what happened."
He shrugged with a lightness he did not truly feel. "The Darkness," was his simple explanation.
Emma simply nodded, cuddling in closer. "It is getting harder to fight. It would be so much easier just to let go."
"I do not want to go back to being the man I was." A shudder ran through him. "Captain Hook has never completely faded away. He is always there, waiting and the Darkness feeds those impulses."
She nodded. "It encourages me just to let go. To stop caring so much. To allow me to be first."
"The Darkness is selfish and easy," he replied. His smile was self-depreciating. "It feeds on our weaknesses. After centuries on my own I am an instinctively selfish man."
"And I push people away and don't want to rely on anyone except myself." It still caught Emma off-guard how open she was with Killian. She had always shared more with him, but since the Darkness and admitting aloud she loved him that trust and truthfulness had grown. She had no desire to hide any of herself from him. Which went completely opposite of everyone else. The trust she had slowly built with her parents was all but completely gone. Henry she did not want to burden with her worries. Sitting here in Killian's lap, her head on his shoulder and his arms wrapped around her she felt peaceful. The Dark impulses barely noticeable. "Can't we stay here forever?"
Softly he dropped a kiss on top of her head. The tension had bled out of him while they sat quietly together. "If we do not head back soon they will come looking for us."
"Let them. I am so tired of being at other's beck and call. I'm so busy being their precious savior that I miss the most important parts of life." Her hand covered his heart, beating reassuringly in his chest. "I knew something was wrong but ignored it because the town needed me."
The arms around her tightened. "I did not blame you. I always knew you had other priorities. Nothing about it was your fault."
"I knew," she whispered. "I knew you were not you but I let it go." Her eyes lifted to meet his. "I won't make that choice again. Henry and you are what's important. Everything and everyone else can just wait their turn. "To her surprise all he did was pull her back into him. No words to try to convince her that she was wrong. That the town and its people needed to come first. She knew that was the Darkness talking, but she did not want to fight these instincts anymore. She and Killian had the right to put themselves first occasionally. Her phone rang and she silenced it without even looking, knowing already who it was. Her mother checking up on her as always.
Killian rose, pulling her to her feet. "She will not give up. We might as well see what she wants and then try to get them to leave us alone."
"But she won't. Not until we are separated and she holds the Dagger in her hand. Possibly not even then. She wants then Darkness out of me and into you only."
His arms pulled her possessively closer. "I would spare you the Darkness if I was able to, but I will not allow us to be divided. You are mine as I am yours."
Her hand went to his cheek, pulling his head down to hers so their foreheads touched. "We share the Darkness until it is defeated or triumphant. Together."
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Restlessly pacing around the loft Mary Margaret checked her phone again. "Why are they not calling back?"
David was rocking Neal gently. "They probably just needed time together. They are relying on each other to fight the Darkness."
"Our independent daughter-"
Putting Neal in his playpen David rose to stand in front of her. "Mary Margaret, you have to stop fighting them. If you do not you are going to drive them away or further into the Darkness. They love each other and at the moment that love is the strongest positive feeling they have."
Mary Margaret sat down on the couch. "I cannot believe that. She is our daughter. She loves us. She loves Henry. Most of the town adores her. She has plenty of people that can anchor her to the Light. By allowing them to rely only on each other when Hook loses his grip he will take her with him. That is why she had to lean on other people who love her. It is also why I want the Dagger out of their control."
In frustration David closed his eyes to gather his thoughts before sitting down beside her. "We do not know that they will give in to the Darkness. Emma and Killian are both strong. Killian explained it to me that day he brought me to the hospital. Right now they are Grey. While they carry the Darkness they cannot be Light but neither wants to be completely Dark. Our job is to support them, to bolster the Light within them both."
"Emma asked us to rid her of the Darkness. That is what I intend to do. Hook never asked to be rid of the Darkness. He just tried to take it." She held up a hand when Charming started to protest. "His intentions may have been good, but it was selfish. He did not want Emma to leave him and now fear for him will weaken her."
David dropped his head onto the back of the couch, closing his eyes wearily. "If you keep this up we are going to lose Emma completely even if we do get the Darkness out of them."
Before Mary Margaret could reply Henry burst into the loft. "Mom and Killian found a way to get to Camelot. They said we need to decide who is going and when we want to leave. I already told Mom and Robin. Killian said he was going to text Belle."
Mary Margaret was instantly on her feet. "Let's go talk to them."
Immediately Henry stepped between Mary Margaret and the door. "They said I should call them if they are needed before tomorrow."
Seeing that he was not going to move Mary Margaret sat back down, reluctantly. David breathed a sigh of relief. He hated being caught between his wife and daughter. He could see both sides of this argument. His personal belief was that the answer was somewhere between the two extremes but right now they had to trust Emma and Killian to protect each other from the Darkness. He saw a long trip ahead of them.
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The meeting the following morning was as bad as David had feared it would be. Killian and Emma were already at the library when he and Mary Margaret arrived. Emma in the pirate's lap and both skimming through ancient looking books that were not in English. He squeezed his wife's hand as a reminder not to say anything to separate the two. Just behind them Regina, Robin and Henry entered, Regina appearing not to be happy about Henry's presence. While David sympathized with the former queen's feelings, he would rather keep Henry away from the Dark Ones; he knew that was a battle they were fated to lose. Henry would not allow himself to be excluded. At least this way they would be able to keep an eye on him and monitor his interaction with the Dark Ones. Belle and Gold were the last to arrive. The acting Sherriff did not miss how Killian's arms tightened around Emma and she moved her hand to play with the hair at the nape of his neck. Quickly Belle sat next to the former pirate, putting Gold on the other side of her.
"How are we getting to Camelot and how did you find it?" Henry asked excitedly as soon as everyone was seated.
Killian put the book he was looking through down on the table. "Ursula knows how to find it and is willing to open a portal to take the Jolly through. Although she did warn me that it could take a few attempts. Apparently Camelot is not always easy to reach."
As expected protest started almost immediately when he finished speaking. "Ursula is a villain. She cannot be trusted," Mary Margaret immediately protested.
"Portals opened by mermaids can only be opened under water. The ship may make it through the portal safely but the people on board will not," Regina informed them.
"Who will you choose to accompany you to prevent you from betraying us?" Gold sneered.
Killian just leaned back in his chair, idly caressing Emma's side while she continued her soothing movements on his neck. Once the ranting was done he looked at Mary Margaret first. "I am aware that the only people who can be redeemed are those Snow White knows and deems capable of being good. However Ursula and I together have killed fewer people that the Evil Queen and Rumplestiltskin individually. And neither one of us had demolished an entire, or almost an entire village on a whim or because we were upset." His gaze hardened. "The world is not black and white." Next he turned his attention to Regina. "Emma and I are quite capable of protecting any passengers aboard the Jolly Roger. To err on the side of safety all passengers will be in scuba gear complete with oxygen." He did not bother to look at Gold as he answered the last accusation. "As to who will accompany us that is up to those present here."
Emma glanced at those around the table. "We could really care less who comes." Her eyes hardened. "Just remember, the Jolly Roger is our ship. We leave in two days on the morning tide." She smiled at Henry. "We will see you later, kid." The two disappeared in a puff of grey smoke.
Releasing a deep breath David shook his head. "Could we please stop riling up the Dark Ones? They could either take off without any of us or choose to give in to the Darkness since they will have nothing to come back to."
"Of course she has a home to come back to. She is still Emma. We just have to get rid of the Darkness."
Regina shook her head in frustration. "You are doing it again. Completely disregarding the pirate is not acceptable to Emma. It does not matter what we think or want. They both come back from the Darkness or neither one will."
"Emma is Light. She has no natural Darkness."
"That does not control us," Robin spoke for the first time. "We are a result of the choices we make. Even the author only opened up or suggested different paths. It was still our decisions to make." He smiled at Regina, squeezing her hand. "If they really want to a person can change the choices they make. Regina has done this, so has Killian. From what I understand he started changing his choices as soon as he took you to Neverland."
With a reluctant nod Mary Margaret leaned back.
"You are all acting like Killian is the weak link and that he will pull Mom farther into the Darkness," Henry spoke next. "But he has been fighting the dark urges for a long time now while Mom has no practical experience with it and us constantly expect things from her."
"Henry," Regina snapped.
He turned to face his other mother. "What? I am not a little kid anymore. I am the Author. I see and understand things I did not before. Besides I've talked with Killian about the Darkness and who he is now, or was before becoming the Dark One."
For a long moment no one said anything. It was David who broke the uncomfortable silence. "While it might be easier for them to fight the Darkness individually it does not really matter. They do not wish to separate and by pushing that idea we are only making them angry. A state we all agree is a bad thing." When no one said anything he went on. "Now we just need to decide who is going to accompany them."