AN: So I'm posting today's chapter early, cause I'm nice like that ;0) To those I've made cry, I'm sorry! To those who hate Edward, this chapter might make you like him or hate him worse.

Beta'd by TwiDi

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter 4: The Truth

Sleep wasn't something that came easy last night. I tossed and turned and maybe got two hours at the most. Finally giving up, I went downstairs and made a pot of strong coffee. Thankfully, I don't have work today.

After downing the first cup, I pour a second and take Jake out. Charlie had one of those invisible fences put in the front yard and a real fence in the back. Not that we really needed them as Jake is great about staying close by us. This morning, I was taking advantage of the front yard's fence so I could sit out on the porch swing and drink my coffee, while Jake does his thing.

Even though it's summer, we were having a nice cool morning. The breeze was blowing gently, the clouds were for once at bay and the humidity was low. It was a perfect morning in complete contradiction to the way that I'm feeling inside. A thunderstorm would be more in keeping with the jumbled emotions at war within me right now.

Last night for the first time in eleven years, I was in Edward Cullen's arms. He held me close as we danced, and he smelled so good. So much like he did eleven years ago. He had more muscles now that was for sure, but he still felt like my Edward. Like my home.

Jake's barking jerked me back to the present. A black sedan was pulling into the driveway behind my car. It wasn't familiar, and the windows were slightly tented, so it was hard to see who was in there. Of course, when the door opened and there he was, my heart dropped into my stomach. My breathing felt like it stopped for a minute.

"Bella, can we talk?" Edward moves towards me. And Jake just sits barking at the strange man in his yard. Pulling myself together a little, I respond.

"Edward, I really don't see where we have anything to say to one another. Why don't you go home to your wife and talk to her." I wonder if I sounded as bitter as I think I did.

"I don't have a wife anymore, Bella. I haven't for a long time. And I think we have a lot to say to one another. Please, just give me a few minutes of your time." His green eyes were intense and I shuddered under their force. He wasn't married anymore? When did that happen?

"Ten minutes." I could give him that, I could surely hold myself together for that long. Couldn't I?

"Thank you." He smiles and I try not to melt. I call Jake and we head into the house, I really don't want the neighbors to have gossip material, so talking inside is the best option for us.

"So…" I wave my hand at him before sitting in Charlie's recliner. Edward sits gently on the sofa and takes a deep breath.

"Eleven years ago, I made the biggest mistake of my life." He says and my jaw is aching to drop, but thankfully, I have enough control still to stop it. "For years, I've thought about it, Bella. What went wrong… How I lost the most important person in my life… I put all that angst, all my frustrations into school and work. I graduated college a year early and graduated medical school top of my class. I finished my residency with offers from many big name hospitals wanting me. None of this has left me feeling fulfilled. There's always been this piece of me missing, the piece that makes me whole. I've been working with Dad in Seattle for the past three months. Each day, I wake up and have to talk myself out of driving down here to see you."

"Edward…" I don't know what to say. He holds up a finger and starts talking again.

"At eighteen, I thought I was a man. I had these visions of the two of us living in an apartment in Boston. I'd go to Harvard, you'd go to UMass and we'd live happily ever after. In my head it was perfect. When you refused to come with me, my ego was blown, because surely that meant that you didn't love me as much as I loved you." He gives a bitter laugh. "I was eighteen, and had no concept of the real world. All I saw was that you were either against me or with me. I felt rejected. I felt like all the years we had been together were a lie."

"I loved you, Edward. I can't believe you would think otherwise." I was pissed.

"Bella, please let me finish." I nod and glare at him to go on. "Like I said this was when I was eighteen. I don't know if you know this or not, but my Mom followed my Dad to college and they've always been the example of perfect true love to me. So, when you wouldn't come with me, I just felt like you never loved me like I loved you. I realize now that I was only thinking of myself, and my wants and needs. In all that time, I never once thought about how I could compromise and stay closer to you. It was all you having to bend to my will, or you not loving me. With age comes wisdom, Bella. At that time, I was a spoiled kid who was used to getting his way. Until that day, Bella, you'd always done things my way and I see how truly selfish I was; and I had to come and apologize. I know now how stupid and egotistical, how selfish I really was… and I wanted you to know that I'm so sorry for that."

"Thank you?" Shit! I had no idea how to respond to that.

"I also never thought of how you would take my offer to pay for your college too, Bella. I know you worked and Charlie saved for your school. In my head, I was going to take care of you, so I'd pay for it. I got half of my trust fund from Grandpa Masen that year; and I knew I could take care of you. I had a plan. After you agreed to go, I was going to ask you to marry me. I had a ring and everything." He sighs. "I was so dumb, so fucking young and inexperienced with the real world."

"You hurt me." Slips out quietly from my lips.

"I hurt us both, Bella. I should have stayed closer to home. Hell! U-Dub is an excellent school! I could have gone there as easily as Harvard. My pride was hurt. So I loaded up my car and left Forks. Knowing in my mind that if you had really loved me, you would have come after me. After three weeks without a word, I gave up, thinking that you didn't even care."

"It didn't take you long to move on, though." I sneer. I couldn't help it, all my anger from the past was coming forward.

"Tanya," he says like the name taste foul in his mouth. "She was in two of my classes and lived in the same dorm. I helped her with chemistry homework and she became my confidant. She told me about the boy from back home that broke her heart when she left to go to school; and I told her about you. I felt like she understood where I was coming from. We built a friendship and one night she came to me in tears. Her sister had called to tell her that her boyfriend from back home had moved on with another girl. I suddenly was filled with images of you and some other guy. If her boyfriend could move on, then you could too."

"But I hadn't, Edward, I was still waiting for you to come back to me. In my heart, you were still my boyfriend." I inform him.

"As I've already said, I was an idiot. So, Tanya and I decided to try being more than friends. She didn't want to go home for Christmas and face her ex with his new girlfriend, who she told me was actually one of her old best friends, so I invited her home with me. Even after seeing your devastated face, I stayed with Tanya—even if I wanted to run after you, to pull you into my arms and tell you I love you. After we went back to school, we kept seeing one another. I took summer classes to avoid coming back to Washington and Tanya did too.

In October, I was starting to cool things off with her, but she came to me and told me that she was pregnant, so I married her. I never really loved Tanya, I cared about her, but I can't say that I loved her at any point," he mutters.

"You're a Dad?" I feel like I could hurl at this point.

"No." He shakes his head. "After the wedding, we got settled into an apartment off campus. Dad called and asked if we'd like to fly out for his birthday. I was all for it, but Tanya didn't want to fly pregnant. She stayed at the apartment and I flew to Seattle to see my folks. When I got back to Boston, Tanya told me she had a miscarriage."

"I'm so sorry, Edward." I could see the pain in his face.

"She lied, Bella. I found out two years later, by accident. Like I said, I never loved Tanya, and I married her for our child. A child she claimed we lost. I tried to make it work. Until me, there was no history of divorce in the Cullen family, marriage is for keeps. However, I was miserable, the longer we were married the more we drifted apart. I couldn't even say she was my friend any more. She loved spending my money though. I had to put my foot down and cut off her spending. One day, I overheard her and her mother talking. Carmen, her mother, was telling her that she needed to give me a child so that I wouldn't leave. Tanya laughed and informed her mother that she couldn't even have kids. That she had been trying to get knocked up to tie me to her, but after a year of trying she went to the doctor and he said that she was completely infertile."

"Oh my God," I whisper.

"Carmen asked her if it was the miscarriage that caused that and Tanya laughed. She told her mother she had faked everything, with the help of a doctor who she slept with. You see, I found out—with some digging, that I wish I had done before I got involved with Tanya—that her family was at one point, very well off. Over the years, they lost their money in bad investments and in lazy heirs who did nothing to replenish their fortune. Tanya grew up spoiled and the bank of Mommy and Daddy was depleted, so she decided to find a new source of funding."

"I don't understand. I thought you bonded over broken hearts?"

"Remember I said Tanya lived in my dorm?" I nod in agreement, that I do remember. "When I confronted her, she confessed that she had overheard me on my phone with Rose one night. She heard our conversation and got out of it that I had lost my girlfriend and that I was torn up about it. She had seen my car, my clothes and from being in my classes she knew my name. With a little digging, she found out that my mother's family is Masen Pharmaceuticals. She hired someone to investigate and she knew that I had not only inherited a good portion of stocks in the company that paid me dividends each quarter but also a huge lump sum of money with more to come. I was a cash cow to her. So she acted up as the female version of me. A broken hearted soul, from a well-to-do family name, trying to make it at Harvard and heal from the loss."

"If her family was broke, how could she afford Harvard?" I was stunned that this person would go to such lengths for money.

"Tanya wasn't stupid. She knew from a young age that the coffers were running low at home. She got a partial scholarship, a ton of loans and in her second year, a rich husband to help pay her bills." He snorts and leans back rubbing his head.

"Oh, Edward, that's horrible."

"She knew I was a vulnerable mark and she went after me. So many times I almost came back that first semester, but she talked me out of it. And after the divorce, I wanted to come and apologize; to tell you everything. I just didn't want to interrupt your life. I figured you have moved on, so an ex showing up begging for forgiveness and telling you that he never quite got over you, wouldn't be something you really wanted." He sighs again. "I pushed myself through school; I became pretty hard and kept everyone at arm's length. You see, I came to believe that Tanya was my punishment for hurting you."

Between the pain in his voice and his eyes, I knew he meant every word he said. Had he hurt me? Yes. But didn't I hurt him as well? I mean, I could have compromised and gone with him, or at least been the bigger person and called him after he left. I waited till he came back home before making a move. And I know that the main reason I waited was because I hoped he had been homesick enough to want to stay. I would have followed him, but I had wanted him to bend to my will, to what I wanted and stay with me.

"I'm sorry too, for my part," I say simply.

"Bella, this is all on me, baby." He insists.

"Edward, ever heard that it takes two? I could have done more as well. Instead, I stayed home and wallowed in self-pity. I could have called. I could have done so many things. Like you said, age brings wisdom. Up until that point, you and I lived in this perfect little bubble where nothing could touch us."

"I'm ninety-nine percent at fault then." He cracks that beautiful crooked smile.

"How about sixty-five?" I joke back and he laughs.

"I can live with that." He raises an eyebrow. "But only if you'll have dinner with me tonight." My heart stuttered in my chest. Is he asking me out?

"Edward, I don't know…" I trail off.

"Bella, please, we can talk some more, catch up and enjoy a nice meal. I've missed you so much, not just as my girlfriend, but also as my best friend." His sad look has always been my down fall. And really don't I owe it to myself? If it sucks, maybe I'll finally be free to move on with someone else. And if it is wonderful, maybe I could have Edward again.

"Deal, if we go to Port Angeles, too many gossips in this town."

"Deal. I'll pick you up at seven?" I agree and he stands to leave. "Till then, Bella." He gently places his hand on my cheek before going to the door.

"Till then," I agree.

I stood in the doorway and watched him drive away. Was it a sign that while he was here, I felt whole and when he left it was like the hole in my heart came back? Looking one last time where his car had driven off to, I sigh and turn to go back inside. This was either the best or stupidest decision in my life. Only time will tell.

AN: Not everything is fine and dandy, but things move quickly because it is a SHORT story. Hope you don't hate Edward as much. Once again thanks for all the support :0)

Also Homecoming is with TwiDi for beta'ing as I write this so update in the next 16 to 48 hours ;0)