Italics indicate thinking

Bold is for attacks

Herrs' POV

"Quest!" Aqua demanded "I'm sick of living in poverty!"

"I thought you didn't want to since they were all so tough thanks to the Dullahan." I scoffed.

"I don't care! I want Money!"

"Wow what a humble Goddess." I mumbled.

"I don't mind." Darkness nodded.

"Please Kazuma!" Aqua threw herself at his sobbing "I don't wanna work in the shopping district anymore!"

"Fine I'm sure I'll run out of money anyway, so go find a quest." He sighed.

"YAY!" Aqua ran off.

"Will she be alright, I have the feeling she's going to being back something crazy." Megumin said.

"Something unreasonable is fine!" Darkness smiled.

"See that's the spirit." I smirked.

"I'm…going to check on her." Kazuma ran off.

"Should we follow him?" Megumin asked.

"Why would you wanna follow Kazuma when you can spend time with me all by yourself." I smirked.

"We should follow him." She immediately stood up.

"TSK!" I growled under my breath.

"We're doing this one!" Aqua cheered coming back.

"You're gonna purify a whole lake?" I asked looking at the paper.

"That doesn't seem very fun." Darkness sighed.

"For you it's not." Kazuma mumbled "Sides I have a plan to make this easy."

Later

"Let me out!" Aqua begged me as we had a horse pull a carriage along, and loaded on that carriage was a cage containing the water goddess "We're not really going to do this right?"

"My strategy is rock solid." Kazuma told her.

"I feel like a rare monster on the way to being sold." She sighed.

"Well you are rare since you're a goddess and your attitude makes you a monster, so I don't see any difference at all." I smiled.

"I kill you!" she tried to grab me through the bars.

Kazuma's brilliant strategy when we got to the lake was to lower the cage into the water and have Aqua sit there and purify it, the cage being what would keep her safe from the monsters. If it broke we were supposed to pull her in but I had a feeling we'd be too weak to pull a chain connected to a ten-foot by ten-foot iron cage.

"It's quiet today." I sighed laying in the grass.

"No monsters are showing up." Megumin nodded.

"Surprised you didn't just try and blow up the lake Loli Witch." I noted "OW!"

She jabbed me with her staff "What have I said about calling me that. Anyway my Explosion is not meant for such simple beast."

"You used it on Frogs the day we met." I deadpanned.

"Shut up!"

"Oi Aqua hurry it up!" I yelled "I wanna go home!"

"I'm doing my best!" she snapped.

"You two seem like you've known each other before." Megumin noted.

"Who me and her?" I asked gesturing down the hill to the cage that was now under attack by giant gators "Aqua and I have history, most of it involves her trying to kick the crap out of me for flirting and stuff, I thought she was just jealous but when I brought it up…things didn't end well."

"Huh?" Megumin tilted her head.

"I got a very nasty scar in a very personal place." I told her as I heard Aqua screaming something in the background.

"Oh." She blushed a bit.

"Yup, I learned it's best not to piss her off too much." I laughed

"Stop having a casual chat and help me!" Aqua yelled.

"Finish purifying the water first." I waved me hand dismissively.

Later

It took about another four hours but the lake was cleared out of toxins and monsters.

"Hey Aqua?" Kazuma banged on the cage.

"Is she broken?" Darkness asked.

"Aqua!" I yelled "Are you tried or dead or what?"

"WAH!" she sobbed.

"If your gonna cry don't take hard quests." I shrugged.

"We agreed that you can keep the whole reward." Kazuma told her.

"That's right 300,000 Eris just for you." Darkness clapped.

"When did I agree to this?" I mumbled "Whatever come on it's boring to see you sulking snap out of it."

"Just take me back like this." She mumbled.

"Huh?" Kazuma asked.

"The world outside the cage is dangerous." She mumbled.

"Great…we broke her." I groaned.

Later

We got Aqua's cage on the cart and started to head back to Axis. Unfortunately, Aqua decided she just had to sing a depressing song about how crappy she felt and that she was going to be sold.

"Aqua quit it you're causing a scene." I groaned.

"The outside is scary." She mumbled.

"TSK!"

"She's really not coming out, is she?" Megumin sighed.

"Lady Goddess!"

The cart was suddenly stopped as some punk ass human in purple blue armor ran up and tried to pry the cage open.

"YAH! He opened it!" Kazuma yelled.

"Even those gators couldn't do that!" Megumin gasped.

"What are you doing in a place such as this?" the boy asked.

"Hey, don't touch my friends so freely." Darkness grabbed his shoulder.

"You should step back." I jumped on the top of the cage and smiled "Least you invoke the wrath of a God, human."

Sometimes it's fun to play the God role like this.

"Aqua do you know him, he called you Goddess." Kazuma asked.

"Goddess?" she hummed "Oh yeah that's right I'm a Goddess!"

"HOW DID YOU FORGET THAT?!" Kazuma and I yelled.

"HMPH!" Aqua squeezed out of the cage "Now then what business have you with a Goddess such as myself? Wait who are you?"

"Me?" the boy looked at her "Mitsurugi Kyouya!"

"Must be a human you sent here." I whispered.

"Hmm not ringing any bells." She hummed.

"You gave me this cursed sword." He pulled up a large greatsword "With it I was reincarnated into this world."

"Huh?"

"You didn't think you were the only one, did you?" Aqua and I sighed.

"Wait a second…" I blinked looking at the sword "Is that my Gram?!"

"Oh that old thing." Aqua hummed.

"You gave away my stuff as starting items?!" I yelled.

"You weren't using it anyway!" she snapped "600 years and all it did was collect dust and the years before that you couldn't even wield the thing anyway it was a piece of junk!"

"Well anyway." She sighed turning back "Now I think I remember you, I mean I said along so many it's hard to keep track."

She's lying through her teeth.

"Well why were you locked in that cage?" the boy asked.

"Cause we dunked her in a lake." I laughed "It was for a quest, very goddess like."

"I was only stuck here because of him!" she pointed at Kazuma "Dragging me into this world as his item."

"HAHAHA!" I kicked my legs on the top of the cage "That's right! It's still friggen hilarious!"

"What were you thinking?!" he grabbed Kazuma by the collar.

"Wait I'm actually having a lot of fun." Aqua told him "And I'm not really that upset anymore, that was just stating facts not being upset."

"I don't know how this man won you over."

"PFFT!" Megumin and I snickered.

"But you are a Goddess and this little punk goes and does these things."

This guy has no filter huh, he just says what he feels.

"Where are you staying?" he asked Aqua.

"The stables." She shrugged.

"GRR!" the man grabbed Kazuma tighter.

"Is there no limit to your rudeness?" Darkness asked "Keep your hands off him."

"I wanna blow him up." Megumin huffed.

"And take half the city with us?" Kazuma said "No thanks!"

"You have such excellent classes and workers yet you make Lady Aqua sleep in a barn." Mitsurugi said "Have you no shame?! All of you should travel with me from now on, I'll even buy you new equipment."

"Hell no." I growled "No more dudes!"

"Herrs do something already." Aqua whispered "This guy freaks me out."

"I just wanna blow him up." Megumin said.

"My urge is normally to be hit." Darkness shivered "Put I want to punch him so much right now."

"Unanimous No." Kazuma turned to walk away "Bye then."

"Wait!" he stood in our way.

"Oh come on." I groaned.

"I cannot leave Lady Aqua in such a place." He explained "Have a match with me where if I win you will turn Lady Aqua over to me and if you win I'll listen to a request you may have."

"Hey Kazuma." I whispered "If you steal my sword back I'll pay you for it."

"Okay let's go!" he dashed in not giving Mitsurugi a chance to prepare.

"Hey wait-!"

"STEAL!"

Kazuma stole the sword and then bonked Mitsurugi on the head with in, knocking him out cold.

"That'll teach you not to walk away." He sighed.

"Alright I got Gram back." I paid Kazuma right there "UGH, crap I forgot this thing was so heavy."

"Can you even use that as an Arcane Archer?" Megumin asked.

"Shut up Loli Bitch, I mean Witch." I gave her a fake smile.

"Coward!" a young girl yelled at Kazuma.

"Oh they're cute." I noted looking at the two girls who just arrived, one had pink pigtails and the other a lime green ponytail hairstyle.

"Are you allies with this guy?" Kazuma asked.

"Disgusting coward!" the other girl yelled "Give back Gram! Only Kyouya can use that sword."

"GRAM!" I pointed the sword and the sky and shot of a beam "What was that, I mean if you're looking to hang out with Gram's user I'm open for arm candy."

Well if we're being fair no one else can use this thing except me and that kid.

"Well we're leaving." Kazuma started to leave.

"We'll never accept this!" the girls yelled.

"I believe in gender equality." Kazuma told them "Don't think I'll go easy on you, I can unleash my Steal in public."

"Yeah do it!" I yelled before Megumin whacked me "OW!"

Unfortunately, the girls ran away in fear, so no fear panties.

The Next Day

"After deducting the cost of the broken cage my reward is just 100,000 Eris." Aqua sighed sitting at the bar with us "I wasn't even the one that broke it! I'm gonna clobber that kid when I see him!"

"Kazuma!"

"Huh?" Kazuma looked behind him "Oh he's back."

"I heard about you from the thief girl." Mitsurugi stomped over, his two fan girls cowering in the background "She said you're a demon that steals panties and covers women in slime."

"No, he's an angel." I smiled.

"Who's spreading a rumor like that?!" Kazuma yelled.

"Lady Aqua I swear I'll defeat the Devil King." The boy said "Please party up with me."

"GOD BLOW!" she immedaitly punched him in the face.

"WHOA!" we all awed.

"Hey you little shit pay the repair fee for the cage!" she snapped "300,000!"

Wait that's 100,00 more than before…

"Can you still return my sword?" he asked Kazuma.

"Can't sold it to him for 20,000 Eris." He pointed at me.

"Can I have my sword back?" he moved over to ask me.

"Can't pawned it for 50,000." I smiled "Turned a sweet profit for that piece of junk mantel piece."

"Damn it!" he yelled running off.

"Why'd you sell it?" Megumin asked.

"It's too heavy, doesn't really do anything, and I wanted some money to cover some bar expenses and pervert fines." I laughed.

"Why did that boy keep calling Aqua a Goddess?" Darkness asked.

"I am Aqua." The girl stood up "The Aqua, Goddess of water who is worshipped by the religious order of Axis. He's a God too."

"Don't drag me into this." I grumbled.

"Did you dream that?" they asked.

"NO I DIDN'T?!"

"The pervert just happens to have the same name as the God of Love." Megumin noted "And similar weapons belonging to him…and looks like all the statues and…crap you are aren't you."

"In the most holy flesh." I snickered.

AN

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Till Next Time!