Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or Alice (Underground).
Note: A bit more graphic than the last, but not too bad. I'm overwhelmed with the positive criticisms for this story and all the people who put it on Alert. Please, do continue to review. And yes, I do know the order in which everyone will be chosen.
Warning: Semi-graphic suicide.
Case File
Pact Member: Tina
Song: Alice (Underground) by Avril Lavigne
Method of Death: Jumping off Building
Time of Death: 11:23 p.m. on Wednesday, September 23, 2010
Last Known Words: "I'm coming, Artie"
Tripping out
Spinning around
I'm underground, I fell down
I fell down
Tina Cohen-Chang hadn't always wanted to kill herself. In fact, it was only something that had recently cropped up. She hadn't realized it until a couple of weeks ago, when Artie's journal had revealed that he'd been gang-raped, that she knew she truly wanted to die. Just like him, she'd had a very, very sucky Freshman year of high school.
And just like him, she couldn't tell anyone else what had happened to her.
She had always been the quiet girl. She was the one who sat in the back of the classroom, praying the teacher wouldn't call on her. Her classmates left her alone, because they thought she had a stutter.
And in elementary school, that kind of thing automatically got you labeled as a freak.
Maybe Tina liked having people leave her alone. After all, she was painfully shy. She preferred to keep to herself, just a book or a drawing tablet to keep her content. Sometimes, she wrote poetry. She had always had surges of creative energy that pulsed through her veins, and liked to find outlets to use them in.
Which is why she wanted to die in one of the most poetic ways she could think of.
I'm freaking out
So where am I now?
Upside down
And I can't stop it now
It can't stop me now
Her parents never really paid that much attention, and Tina never expected them to or anything. See, Tina was adopted, to a Jewish woman and an Asian-American man. She was only eight months old when it happened, so she didn't remember anything about her stint in a Korean orphanage. All she knew were her adoptive parents.
Who, again, didn't pay much attention to her, or they'd know that she was severely depressed.
But then, no one knew what Tina had been through in the last twelve months alone.
Oh, she'd been close. She was so close to telling Artie what had happened, the complete and whole truth, but now Artie was dead and lying cold in the grave before she'd had the chance. Oh, how bad she felt for breaking Artie's heart! She hadn't meant to, really. She was just a little angry at him for being misogynistic towards her. She never meant to hurt him, or to push him over the edge. Upon hearing his last known words, she felt her own heart shatter into a thousand pieces (like it hadn't already). "I'm sorry, Tina". How badly those words had hurt! She had cried for days afterwards, until she was sure her tear ducts had run out of tears.
But now, as she was on a bus headed downtown, they started to work again, and she found herself crying alone in the back corner seat, curled up in a ball. She took out her black journal and began thumbing through its worn pages.
I, I'll get by
I, I'll survive
When the world's crashing down
When I fall and hit the ground
I will turn myself around
She'd loved Artie. Really, she had. How could she not fall for that warm, crooked smile? How could she not instantly feel her heart pitter-patter at his nice, strong voice? How could she not admire his nice arms, built up from all those hours of pushing himself in his wheelchair? How could she not adore his bowties and suspenders or his glasses? No, Tina loved Artie. She loved him when she first met him, and she still loved him now, and she'd continue to love him even after tonight, when she'd die. Maybe Artie had been her soul-mate, and she'd let him get away. She couldn't bear to think of him lying in his bed, as if he were sleeping soundly, when his mother came home to find him dead. Mrs. Abrams still did not know that her son had taken his own life, and she might not ever know it. Artie's journal had been burned after they'd read it, so there was no chance she could ever see the proof.
Tina could not imagine who could possibly want to hurt Artie Abrams in such a way that would break him into a thousand shards.
Then again, she could one-hundred percent imagine it.
She only wished she could've let him know that.
Don't you try to stop it
I, I won't cry
She remembered everything about that night. Her mom had been out—Tina could not remember where at the moment—and Tina was stuck home with her Dad. That is to say, her Dad and her Dad's creepy, lecherous friends. She'd brought her report card in to show her father—something she'd been avoiding all day—and, as suspected, he was less than happy with her B+ in Algebra. She couldn't help it; Algebra just wasn't her thing, no matter how many times Artie explained the quadratic formula. Her father was even more displeased with her A+ in her art class. He'd always told her that art was not an acceptable career, something that you could not make a living off of. She bent over, fully expecting to get the belt, as she'd gotten occasionally over the years.
And, as expected, she got a few whaps across the ass with her father's belt.
But Tina had the misfortune of wearing a short black skirt and bikini brief underwear that day. Her father seemed to be enjoying punishing her a little too much. It was kind of creeping her out, especially how her father's friends were staring at her lustfully. She attempted to back out of the room silently, accepting her punishment and move on.
But of course, it didn't work that way. Did it ever?
I found myself in Wonderland
Get back on my feet again
Is this real?
Is this pretend?
I'll take a stand until the end
Tina finally plucked herself off the ground hours later. She'd been raped by all five of the men in the room, including her father.
Excuse me, her adoptive father.
She felt disgusted as she tried to scrub off the dried semen that stuck to her inner thigh. She knew that in cases of rape, you weren't supposed to do that, as it was hardcore evidence. But she couldn't tell anyone about this. She'd be murdered for sure. It wasn't that her adoptive father was necessarily a bad person. He just believed in enforcing punishments upon children who misbehaved or did not perform up to his own personal standards in school.
And if that meant raping your daughter and having four of your friends do the same to teach her a lesson, then so be it.
Tina realized two weeks later with a sinking heart that her period was late. She stopped by the drugstore on her way home from school and secretly purchased a pregnancy test.
It came up positive.
She had three options. She could give birth to this child and keep it. She could give birth to this child—whose it was, she had no idea—and give it up for adoption.
Or she could have an abortion.
She quietly and quickly chose the third option. There was no way—no way in hell—she could give birth to a child whose father she did not know, especially one that was the product of not one rape, but several.
So she went, and she got the abortion with money left over from her birthday, and that was that. The problem was taken care of, or so she thought.
The thing with rape is, you never really forget it.
I, I'll get by
I, I'll survive
When the world's crashing down
When I fall and hit the ground
I'll just turn myself around
And thus, this was why Tina ultimately signed the Pact. Not just because she knew Artie was going to sign, and she did not want to live if he didn't, but because of what happened. She knew it was only going to happen again. That was just what her father was like. Once he'd taken her virginity, he'd always come back for more, and who knew what might happen next? She certainly couldn't afford birth control, nor did she particularly want to take it over and over. No, she was almost positive that she wanted to die, that she'd rather stop living than to re-live what happened to her that night for the rest of her life, however long or short that may have been. She got off the bus all the way downtown, at the very end of the line, and headed towards her destination, bag in hand that contained her iPod and her journal, as well as her cell phone. Her parents didn't know where she was. Only one person did, and that was their leader. Tina knew why she'd been picked second; because she couldn't go on much longer without Artie. She wondered briefly how they'd react to the things that had been written in her journal. Would they react the same way they had to Artie's confession? Would they want to gang up on her father? Would they cry for her, the way they had for him?
Don't you try to stop me
I, I won't cry
Tina climbed the fire escape with ease, as she'd done in practice. It was twenty floors up, and this she knew perfectly well. She finally reached the top, her goal, her destination, and swung herself up onto the roof of the old warehouse. She looked down dizzily into the dark alleyway that ran alongside the abandoned warehouse and the one next door. Taking a few quick breaths, she grabbed her iPod and turned on the song she'd selected. It was the perfect song to jump to your death to, she'd thought. While she was rummaging in her bag, she sent off a quick text message:
Tina: I'm here. I'm going to do it in five minutes or less, I promise.
(512) 425-9821: I'll be there in fifteen minutes. I'm waiting the next block over. Artie will meet you on the other side.
Tina slid her phone away, breathing heavily. She bit her lip to keep from crying; no, she told herself. You're not supposed to cry when you do this. You're supposed to keep a brave face, to greet Death with open arms. She wasn't afraid to die, per se, as she believed in an afterlife. She just hoped that Artie would be there to greet her and kiss her, forgiving her for breaking his heart. Finally, she and her secret could be free, like an eagle. She positioned herself at the edge of the roof, thanking Artie profusely for giving her the correct trajectory in his journal that ensured that she would die. He'd helpfully put it and other suicide options at the end of his journal after signing the Pact in case it should help anyone else get to the other side.
She closed her eyes and spread her arms open wide.
And she leapt…
I, I'll get by
I, I'll survive
When the world's crashing down
When I fall and hit the ground
I will turn myself around
The leader of the Pact slipped around the corner precisely fifteen minutes after they'd replied to Tina's text. Sure enough, they saw Tina's broken body lying facedown on the ground, blood pouring from the Asian girl's skull, staining the concrete below. The leader gently turned Tina over and watched for signs of breathing, feeling for a pulse to be sure that the girl was dead. She was. The leader climbed the fire escape to the top of the building and found Tina's bag at the top, securing the journal and Tina's iPod and cell phone. They checked the song that Tina had chosen; it was perfect beyond words. They smiled softly and put the items into their own bag, tossing Tina's down beside her for evidence. They climbed back down, catlike in their grace, and dialed 9-1-1 from Tina's cell phone, running away before anyone answered. They went a ways down the street, hiding around a corner until they heard the sound of sirens approach; the police had tracked Tina's cell phone number and coordinates, and had found her body. It would more than likely be framed as a murder, especially with what the leader read stealthily in Tina's journal on their way home. Yes, they decided, this one was easy to get away with. They just hoped Artie was on the other side to greet the broken Asian girl with open arms next to Death herself.
Don't you try to stop me
I, I won't cry
To be continued…