First off thanks to all that followed, favorited or reviewed! Always a boon to know someone is reading! Second off, I realized I made a small error in the story in the last chapter. While it does not matter here and now it will eventually. I wrote that the goblins sampled Iztal's blood at the bank. For sake of the plot please disregard this. Finally, I realize that some characters are OOC but this is fanfiction and I will continue to write them as such including perhapps over the top vilinization of certain characters. Hope this does not disuade you from reading,

Here is the next chapter. as always please read and review! hope you enjoy.

Chap 3: The art of being alone

It was at that moment he realized that his spirit was truly human once more. For he no longer remembered how to be alone without being lonely."
― Neal Shusterman, Everwild

As Hadrian followed his friend across the hidden barrier (a barrier which would lead to the departure of his only family member) he felt as if he was being pulled apart by a combination of conflicting emotions.

For one he was proud and excited for Iztal, he cared enough for the other boy he wanted what was best for him and getting off the streets and an education was undeniably the best thing for Iztal. However, deep down he could not deny he was equal parts jealous and afraid. Hadrian knew that although Iztal was only 18 months older than him, that others saw cruelness in Iztal that made them both respect and fear the boy. This in turn made them leave the two of them alone. Hadrian was anything but stupid, he knew that his life would become much more difficult without the older boys protection. Beyond these feelings Hadrian felt hurt. He knew that Iztal needed to go to this school, but it didn't stop him from feeling that once again he was being abandoned. Iztal was right, caring was a weakness.

Even with this inner turmoil taking place Hadrian could not help but once again feel awed at the sight of the Hogwarts Express. The loud din of parents, children and their familiars filled the platform but Hadrian could not tear his eyes away from the magnificent red train.

"Iztal look!" he whispered unable to keep the excitement out of his voice.

Iztal shook his head at Hadian's childish reaction but smiled indulgently at the raven haired youth. Anyone else he would have found this exuberance irritating, but Hadrian had always been the exception. "Close your mouth you gobshite, your catching flies" he admonished, no real malice in his tone.

Hadrian reddened with embarrassment but couldn't quite wipe the grin off his face. "Shut up, God Iztal your so lucky….I-I wish I was going with you"

"I know Hades. But it's only a year, you can do what I can, I know you'll get invited next year" Iztal replied with conviction. There was no doubt that Hadrian was special like he was. He would after all never tolerate someone who was ordinary.

Hadrian didn't reply. He wouldn't burden his friend with the despair he was feeling at being left behind. He wouldn't take away from this day for Iztal. Both boys let their eyes scan the crowd, Hadrian out of pure interest, Iztal picking out potential allies. Their habit of observing first, acting after had not failed them yet. In fact it was the reason that they had even found the hidden entrance to the platform. Even they had not suspected that you had to walk through a bloody brick wall to get into the platform. Wizards were a little odd.

As the train whistled its 15min to departure warning Hadrian shifted nervously from foot to foot, unsure what to say. He wanted to hug his friend but didn't dare, Iztal hated physical contact even more then he did, and that was saying something. Iztal for once looked just as uncomfortable as Hadrian did.

"I'll write. I'm sure I'll have lots to tell you. That way you will know what to expect when it's your turn" Iztal finally said. Hadrian just nodded, he didn't dare speak he didn't want his voice to crack or do something equally as mortifying.

"I'll figure out how to send you the letters, even if you have to move or something….Avoid Jeremy and his gang. Keep Moñái with you she should help keep the idiots at bay, and for godsake don't advertise that I'm not around" Iztal demanded, going over his instructions for what must have been the tenth time that morning. (Moñái was the name he had given his snake, after one of the seven legendary monster of a tribe in South America. This monster was said to be lord of the skies and had a habit of robbing and raiding the people, causing discord and mistrust amongst them. Hadrian thought it rather appropriate considering who he was).

"I Know Iztal, I'm not a moron" Hadrian stated slightly defensive. He COULD take care of himself he wasn't an invalid. His fear for Iztal's departure had more to do with the fact he didn't WANT the boy to leave not that he NEEDED him to stay.

The final warning whistle went off. "I know" Iztal replied so quietly Hadrian almost missed it. Iztal stood a second longer looking torn with indecision. In a quick move he leaned over and grasped Hadrian in a quick forceful hug before letting go and walking away so quickly Hadrian almost thought he had imagined the whole thing.

Hadrian watch Iztal disappear into the huge train in shock, it wasn't until the boy had vanished that Hadrian whispered under his breath, "Good bye Iztal, don't forget about me."

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One month later (early October)

Hadrian settled his small frame down in the old sofa of his and Iztal's flat, effectively turning himself into a human pretzel. Once settled he removed the letter with no small amount of reverence for the third time that day, which considering that he had only received it this morning was telling. It was Iztal's first letter to him since he had left a little over a month ago. To say that Hadrian had been a little shocked to wake up to a large brown owl staring down at him would be an understatement, he had after all not been witness to Iztal receiving his Hogwarts letter. Despite his rather intrusive wake up call, Hadrian was thrilled with Iztal's letter.

While written in what Hadrian had come to term 'Iztal speak' (aka: abrupt, factual, an emotionally void relaying of facts), Hadrian was able to read between the lines and tell that Iztal was in fact excited, interested and impressed with his new world. The only thing that gave Iztal pause was the hint at Iztal's house placement. While Iztal was in no uncertain terms happy with being placed in Slytherin, Hadrian could tell that he had not received the most welcoming of initiations into the house. According Iztal, the wizarding world was not all that unlike muggle (which Iztal told him was the term for nonmagical people) society. According to Iztal that wizards, even beyond wealth and knowledge (especially Slytherins) seemed to value blood purity. Hadrian thought this was stupid, it reminded him rather of the muggles and their prejudices against people of different color or cultural backgrounds.

But he trusted Iztal and if Iztal said it was important then Hadrian wasn't going to argue. Plus he knew just how hateful and disgusting muggles could be; he had after all spent more than enough time with them in the orphanage. Really he had never received a speck of kindness from ANY muggle before. The only one that had ever showed him an ounce of kindness (that he remembered anyway) had been Iztal and Iztal was a wizard. So Hadrian could understand in a way this prejudice.

Iztal had hinted that being an orphan and poor had made his introduction to the wizarding world and more importantly the Slytherin house a tad more difficult, but Hadrian knew that Iztal was unlikely to let this stand in his way so he pushed his worries for his friend aside and reveled in the other details Iztal had imparted. Truthfully the letter reminded Hadrian more of a storybook or a piece of fiction then reality which given Hadrian' s penance for day dreaming only made him yearn for this new world even more.

Hadrian sighed and reluctantly refolded the letter and put it away. It would not do to sit and wallow, nothing could come of that. No, it was time to go and see if he could snitch something. He had decreased the number of trips in which he stole things from when it was him and Iztal. In truth he no longer needed to steal as much as it was only him, that and he had less security in leaving his cache of goods behind with no one to watch over them.

Hadrian had returned to Diagon alley twice since his trip with Iztal, more to watch and learn then to steal anything. That and to pass time and limit the risk of him running into Jeremy and his crew. The more time he spent in the magical world the less he spent hiding. So far he had been lucky. He had not had any confrontations with the other street players, for this he was thankful.

"Come Moñái….we are going hunting!"Hadrian hissed at his familiar. He had spent an increasing amount of time conversing with his snake. It was through talking with his familiar that he had discovered that it was an Inland Tapain, a snake that while not normally aggressive had the most toxic venom of any land snake. Leave it to Iztal to buy him a lethal snake and not tell him. Not that he was afraid of the snake as Moñái had promised to never bite him, but still.

"This is good, I am hungry and bored little one, where are you taking us?"Moñái asked slithering her rather innocuous brown colored body to coil around his forearm.

"I think Diagon alley is the best choice. I think it would be wise to start making acquaintances my age. That way I will have allies before even entering Hogwarts. If Iztal's letter is anything to go by I believe allies would be wise, my dear"Hadrian replied, a plan slowly formulating. From what he had garnered from Iztal's letter Slytherin house was about power, wealth and blood purity. It sounded like a hierarchy, one that you did not want to be on the bottom of. If Hadrian could somehow manage to enter his first year already having a powerful ally behind him this would only serve in his best interests. And Hadrian always served his own interests first. Well, that is decided then, he would go to Diagon alley and scout out potentials. Someone his age, who was wealthy and what Iztal called 'pure of blood.

Decision made, Hadrian couldn't help but be pleased. Not only would this benefit him in the long run, it would give him something to do other then miss Iztal. Yes, gain more power…Iztal would approve.

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Mid-December

Hadrian absently noted the cold air that was slipping through the only, albeit broken window in the flat. Really he should do something about that, but at moment he simply did not care. He did not know what he was. He was angry, lonely, confused, worried and most of all hurt. All thanks to this blasted letter. Sure intellectually he realized it was the writer not the letter that he was actually angry at, but then again at the moment he did not much feel like being intellectual.

He crumpled the letter into a ball and tossed it across the room. And things had been going so well. Okay, so not awesome…he was still alone after all. But they had been going well enough. He had made remarkable progress in his task. It had taken time, but he had successfully be-friended? well made acquaintance with ,Draco Malfoy.

He had spotted the rather spoiled blond trailing after the snooty man that he and Iztal had robbed early in the year. Knowing the man was wealthy, and assuming he was pure of blood (if the disdainful look he gave everyone else was anything to go by), Iztal had managed to accidently be purchasing robes of fine quality at the same time as the Malfoy heir was.

He had of course stolen said Galleons for robes earlier in the day. He had also been careful to purchase numerous books concerning wizarding tradition and beliefs a week earlier and had spent every waking hour studying them to be sure not to offend the pretentious boy. All in all his efforts paid off. Really it was simpler then he thought it would be. When asked by Draco where his parents where he had used a simple misdirect. "Your parent's don't trust you enough to let you shop on your own?" with a snooty tone had done it. The blond boy had colored a rather deep shade of magenta before continuing to talk about himself.

From what Hadrian could gather the boy was rather lonely for company his own age, not to mention loved nothing more than to talk about himself, his own importance and his families importance. Really, all Hadrian had had to do was nod every once in a while and say a few derogatory comments about muggles. Hadrian had been slightly concerned that Draco's father would recognize him, or ask the uncomfortable questions that Draco had neglected but his fears had been unfounded. Lucius, apparently spent very little time concerning himself with his son's affairs. Sure he put on a fatherly act when greeting his own associates but from what Hadrian could garner he spent very little time actually being a father to Draco. All the better for him.

So yes, things had been going just fine for Hadrian, and he could not wait to tell Iztal in person. Which he could do over Christmas holls since Iztal had promised Hadrian he would come back for them. A lie apparently, if the letter Hadrian had taken his ire out on was telling.

Hadrian and Iztal had never actually celebrated the stupid holiday, but regardless they still were together. It wasn't so much the fact that Iztal was missing the holiday or even the fact that he was not coming back; it was more to do with the fact that he had broken his word. Never before had he broke a promise to Hadrian. Sure he could be cruel, say harsh things or even violent but he never lied. He had once told Hadrian that there was no point in lying when he could just tell Hadrian the truth. What was left unsaid was that Iztal trusted Hadrian to not leave even if his truths were unpleasant.

So this was a major slap in the face. Hadrian knew he was being melodramatic, but to him this was a confirmation of his worst fears. Iztal was moving on, he was forgetting him. In the midst of his pity session, Hadrian had sent the brown owl away without replying. He was that angry.

If Iztal could forget him, then fine he would forget Iztal. Deep down he knew that this was not possible.

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Late February

Not even a week after Hadrian had angrily dismissed the school owl, reason slowly began to wiggle its way into the fore front of his brain. With reason came guilt. He had over reacted he knew this even while doing it. This was the type of stupid emotion that made one weak.

Iztal had explained in his letter that he needed to stay in the castle to give him time to study. Hadrian KNEW that knowledge would lead to power, so really he wasn't all that surprised that Iztal wanted a chance to increase his. True, he was still hurt at the broken promise, but really did it make that big of a difference? It wasn't like Iztal had out right lied to his face; he had simply changed his mind.

Somehow, Hadrian preferred his righteous anger to the now churning guilt he was experiencing. After not replying to Iztal, Iztal in turn and not sent another letter. Hadrian did not have an owl to apologize with and even if he did he wasn't sure if he could bring himself to say sorry. After all it wasn't ALL his fault.

Hadrian had instead buried his guilt in his task. Meeting more often with Draco in Diagon alley (Draco's father had eventually agreed to allow the preteen to go alone, if he was back before a set time). Something that helped facilitate the boys meetings. The topics between the two were never very deep, often centering on quiditch (a queer wizarding sport), things they had learned (Draco from tutors, Hadrian from books…not that Draco knew Hadrian was teaching himself), and notable figures in the wizarding world. Despite his age, Draco happened to be rather knowledgeable on important ministry workers, and the most powerful, and influential wizards in the wizarding world. Their conversations had even strayed to 'The dark lord, Voldmort, who according to Draco had been the most powerful dark wizard to ever exist. Well up until some spell backfired on a toddler and killed him. Though Draco insisted he wasn't really dead.

Hadrian had found the story interesting and it had led to him questioning what the difference between light and dark wizards was. He of course could not ask Draco (as Draco believed he grew up in the wizarding world and would have found the question rather suspicious) so Hadrian had added more reading material on the topic. What he had found however did not really answer his question and seemed rather screened to say the least.

That was another thing Hadrian had thrown himself into. Research, reading and learning. He spent hour upon hour reading books on potions, transfigurations, hexes, history, charms, auras basically anything that he could afford and get his hands on. More and more of his ill gotten loot went towards his quest for knowledge so much so that he had started to neglect taking care of himself. More often than not he missed meals or a night's sleep in favor of attaining more knowledge.

These habits of course lent to his over sight in how to make things right with Iztal. It wasn't until late February, while heading out of Diagon alley after meeting Draco for the afternoon did it hit Hadrian. Passing by the owl post, Hadrian could have struck himself. Of course! He could use one of the owls in the alley to send a letter. Really the cost would be minimal. And at this point Hadrian missed his friend enough to apologize and ask for forgiveness. He only hoped he was not too late. .

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End of May

Hadrian shuddered as carefully crawled into the small damp space, a feeling of overwhelming loss and anger raged inside him. Following his apology to Iztal many months earlier, things had resumed as before. Iztal had begrudgingly accepted his apology (not that he said as much but the resumption of correspondence from him stated that he had), Hadrian had continued his learning, though not at as frenzied of pace as previously, and he had continued to spend time with Draco.

Everything had been moving along as it should, right up until earlier that day. Hadrian squeezed his smoke wearied eyes close and thought back on what had caused his current predicament.

Growing low on basic supplies Hadrian had forgone his usual trip to the alley for a visit to muggle London instead. Several hours of patience had been rewarded and he had managed to pilfer two wallets, which contents he had immediately used to buy a few non –perishables, a set of clothes and a pair of new shoes (the old ones had developed holes in the sole). While remarkably Hadrian had managed to avoid Jeremy up until this point. it seemed as though his luck had run its course.

Hadrian had been scuttling down the nearly abandoned back alley, it was the best short cut to his flat. He had decided against dissapparting (this was apparently what shimmering was called), mainly because he had Moñái with him and she hated it). Having perhaps grown slightly over confidant in his lack of confrontations thus far, he really hadn't argued with her, leading to him walking quite nearly alone down the alley.

"Well, well boys what have we here" a raspy but oh too familiar voice called out.

Hadrian spun slowly around to face the owner of the voice. While Iztal and he had used their abilities in front of the group before (well Iztal anyway), Hadrian had learned from Draco how important it was that Muggles not see or find out about magic. Therefore, while Hadrian felt his stomach clench with dread he decided against dissapparting and fleeing.

"What do you want Jeremy?" Hadrian asked his tone flat, not betraying the storm of emotion just under the surface.

This was not the first encounter he had had with the late teen. It had occurred shortly after meeting Iztal, before Hadrian really understood his abilities outside basic protection. It was another reminder that being a beautiful child was not a favorable thing on the streets. If Iztal had not come upon them when he did….Hadrian shuddered to think what could have happened.

"What makes you think I want something, pretty? Maybe I jus interested in some conversation hmm?" Jeremy replied his lips turned up in a parody of a smile. He was not alone, not that the drug king ever was. Like always he had a group of muscle with him, all which chuckled darkly at their leaders comment.

Hadrian didn't answer, letting his eyes scan for a possible exit while appearing to lean casually against the stained brick wall behind him.

"Where's your little friend pretty? I haven't seen him around in awhile… it would appear that you are quite alone" Jeremy continued his smile falling at the lack of response he so obviously wanted and expected from his prey.

"He's coming, had a few extra things to pick up…things I'm not sure you'd enjoy them" Hadrian replied feigning more bravado then he felt at the moment. More and more he was thinking that he would have to resort to his 'abilities' to come out of this unscathed.

"You know, I really don't think he is…." Jeremy hissed out, pressing in closer so that his unwashed body pressed Hadrian against the wall. "I really don't think he'll be along to interrupt us this time"

Hadrian fought his urge to gag at the smell of the older man, "Is this really the only way you can get some action? Forcing yourself on those smaller then yourself? No one willing to sleep with a disgusting, cunt like yourself?" Hadrian spit into his too close of face. "Really Jeremy I didn't take you for a poof" he added just to add to what the older man would take as an insult.

"You little slut….I'll make you pay for that" Jeremy spat his face clenched in rage.

Hadrian knew that last had been a mistake, seeing no plausible escape from this situation he took the time to bring his knee up hard into the others groin before promptly dissapparting leaving his purchases scattered behind.

Had this been the end of it, Hadrian would have said he got off rather easily. However he should have known better.

Hadrian had apparated to his flat, angry and not a little disappointed at the loss of his next meal. Deciding that had been more than enough action for the day, Hadrian decided against going out and finding something to eat. Rather he curled back into himself picking up the new potions book he had purchased earlier in the week. Not for the first time Hadrian wished he could be more like Iztal. Iztal did not hesitate to hurt those who threatened or hurt him. Hadrian would defend himself if pushed but he was always far more hesitant to fight back with violence regardless of the situation.

Pushing these ruminating thoughts away he concentrated on his book, determinedly ignoring the hunger pains in his gut. Slowly but surely he relaxed the words in front of him once more taking him away from the pains and frustrations of the physical world. Slowly he drifted into an uneasy sleep.

The first thing Hadrian processed when he woke was the choking, burning sensation in his lungs. Next the searing heat that threatened to engulf him registered. Hadrian shot up, looking wildly around him, taking in the bright orange and red tinge of his surroundings, the harsh colors only being dimmed by the cloying, choking grey smoke that billowed and filled the flat.

In the back of his mind Hadrian thought dully, 'guess Jeremy didn't appreciate failing and being embarrassed in front of his crew' this fleeting thought only competed with the question of how Jeremy had found the flat. It had been his and Iztal's secret from the gang. Iztal had been careful to remove the knowledge from everyone else's mind after they had taken it to be their own.

The instinct of survival finally fought its way through Hadrian's smoke addled brain, the searing pain of a 2nddegree burn on his arm helping to clarify things. Hadrian's quick scan of the smoke filled room told him that it was too late to save his belongings, thankfully Moñái liked to wrap around his torso when he slept. Giving up on the idea of saving anything, Hadrian closed his eyes an apparated them to the other side of London. To a street he had once stumbled upon by accident while trying to find another hunting ground. The street was in descript, filled with worn down buildings and dying businesses.

Hadrian thought to the small library worth of books that had been destroyed and for the first time in years let a single tear run down his cheek.