Chapter Four ~ Unusual Feelings

Sebastian's prov.

I opened my tired eyes reluctantly, sunlight piercing through the drapes that I had forgotten to close during my haste of last night's intimate gathering with my Master. A quiet yawn escaped me as I awoke from my slumber. For the first time in years, I actually felt tired. Even though sleep was merely a luxury for me, it did nothing to quench the tiredness that I had been feeling for two days running. I had hoped that a long night's rest would have cured me of my ailment, but it barely even made a dent.
I felt far too warm, the little furnace of my Master's body still tangled around me, his grip like a little vice around my waist. I groaned quietly and gently scooped him off me, untangling my legs from his so that I could rise.
I shuffled over to the edge of the bed, my legs over the side, not caring in the slightest that I was naked. All I cared about was getting on with today's duties, which as far as I was concerned, consisted of a trip to London to check out the newly found bodies that had been popping up through the back allies of the ancient city. A trip to London, that may bring up my spirits, I thought as I rubbed my neck and shoulders. The muscles seemed to be rather tense and clenched with every movement I made, How odd.

Stiffly I got up, standing on unsteady legs. I tried to walk, but my legs wouldn't cooperate. I lost my balance, knocking over a lamp in the attempt to catch myself on the bedside table. I winced as the lamp shattered on the ground and cursed loudly, instantly clapping my hand over my mouth as I glanced over my shoulder at the young Master. He is not the heaviest of sleepers at all, I heard him stir, his cerulean blue eye peeking over the mound of sheets I left in my wake.

"Are you alright Sebastian? What was that?" he asked, rubbing his eyes with his fists.

Carefully, I sat back onto the bed. The mattress dipping under my weight as I smiled back at the young Master, "I am fine, my lord. Just slipped that's all," my falsely cheery tone seemed to concern him even more as he pulled himself up to see the shattered remains of the lamp on the floor. I half expected him to pitch a fit, but he just sat back against the pillows, the sunlight caressing his smooth chest. His eyes landed on me, the faustian seal on his right eye glowing slightly, just as my hand was. I still found it rather unsettling, but I had come to the conclusion that the glowing was a result of our change in relations, therefore, I pushed it to the back of my mind.

"You broke a lamp?" my Master said in surprise, "That is not like you at all Sebastian." Concern dripping from his voice. It annoyed me that he was overly concerned when I broke something, yet if anyone else were to break a lamp, he wouldn't even bat an eyelash. He would just order me to buy a new one to replace it.

"Are you sure you're feeling alright?"

I tried to smile at his kind hearted concern, twisting so I could brush my lips against his, feverishly moving around his. I pulled away, slightly breathless, "I assure you, Ciel, I just slipped. Even demon butlers have little accidents now and then."

My Master wouldn't buy it, his eyebrows curving over his eyes as he scowled at me, "Even so, you're not just any demon butler. You have never broken anything since you started working for me," he prodded, "Therefore, for you to break something now, there must be something wrong."

I sighed in exasperation, lying down on my stomach, propping my elbows up so I could hold my head in my hands, "You are as vigilant as ever my lord. It is nothing, honestly."

My Master sighed, caressing my skin with his hand, rubbing my shoulder lightly, "Please tell me Sebastian, you are concerning me."

This tugged at the proverbial heartstrings. Hearing that my Master was genuinely voicing his concern over me. My, my it was enough to send euphoria crashing through me, "My shoulders are just a little stiff and my legs haven't awoken properly. That is why I slipped when I tried to leave. I am sorry I woke you," I muttered, listing what ailed me, hanging my head. My raven black hair drooping around my cheeks.

The young Master smiled softly, stroking his hand up to my cheek, brushing my hair out of my face and tucking the strands behind my ear, "I am sure you are entitled to having an off day. But as long as you are alright..."

"I will be fine, my lord," I murmured, my voice muffled by my hands.

He sighed, "Alright, but the moment I deem that you are anything but fine, I will excuse you of your duties. Do you understand?" he ordered, his voice authoritive, already adopting his 'master' persona.

"Yes my lord," I sighed, lifting my head so I could look at my sleep mussed Master properly, "Now with you looking so delicious, I propose a quick intimate play before I make your breakfast, how does that sound?" I suggested, my eyes lighting up as the young Master smirked.

He curled his finger towards me, beckoning me to come closer, "I think that sounds rather provocative. However I believe I will indulge you since your not feeling your absolute best today," he murmured, roughly planting his lips to mine, his hands clawing at my hair.

I purred under his touch, Oh my Master, I could forget about anything when you kiss me like that, I thought as my heart swelled. The generosity of my Master today was very alluring, causing my adoration for him to grow within me. My Master pulled away for the moment, touching my face delicately before whispering, "I love you Sebastian."
That was my complete undoing, as I smiled back at him like a Cheshire cat. My heart soared, my worries over my being tired and stiff seemed to drain away. I brushed my lips back to his, playfully biting his lower lip softly. My deft fingers finding the one spot on his side that I had discovered as his ticklish spot. I dug my fingers into it, Ciel gasping and jumping back away from me, holding up a pillow in his half hearted attempt to defend himself from me. I laughed, throwing my head back. I crawled over to him on all fours, my back arching in pleasure like a cat as I plucked the pillow away from him and tossed it aside.

"Sebastian! No... No please don't," Ciel tried to order, his face betraying the pleasure he was actually feeling from being stalked by an amorous demon. I pounced on him, capturing him in my arms, his laugh soaring my spirits to unspeakable heights. It reminded me of his youth, granted he didn't laugh very much back then, but when he did it was music to anyone's ears. I drew the young Master to my chest, nuzzling my nose against his, my eyes boring into those cerulean depths. His declaration was heartfelt and true, I could challenge anyone to look into this man's eyes and try to tell me otherwise.

"I love you too Ciel," I murmured, kissing the young Master's lips passionately, drawing the sheets around us as we resumed our morning copulation.

As the day continued to progress, the further the ailments of this morning strayed from my mind. Granted I had to admit that I was rather concerned that I was being affected by such common ailments that humans, let me stress, humans not demons, get. It was not normal for a demon to have aches and pains, no matter any kind, because we are not necessarily wired to feel such things. However after the morning's very pleasurable love making, my darling young Master used his skilled little hands to manipulate the muscles in my shoulders until the pain was no more but a distant memory. It was most gratifying and he would definitely be rewarded later once we arrived at the town house.
Much to my distaste, I hated the fact that we had left the beautiful countryside manor, for the smog filled streets of the city of London. Granted being the Queen's guard dog, my Master was required to do so. But surely this smog was no help for anyone's health. Luckily the other servants had decided to stay behind, only because we were only planning to be away for such a short time. Our venture only lasting long enough for my Master to glance at the bodies of the recently murdered, then to quickly solve the case, all of which could be done in a few days, aided by my particular expertise.

I was up in the driver's seat and my Master tucked safely behind me in the carriage. My annoyance growing as the countryside waned around us. My Master chuckling every so often, loud enough that I could hear him over the sound of the horses' hooves on the cobbled road. I did not bother to ask him what he was finding so amusing, since to be fairly honest, I wasn't at all interested. My mood had shifted considerably since leaving the Phantomhive manor, slowly becoming stormier the further we came away from it. At this time, all I cared about was getting to the town house before nightfall as the thought of driving through the countryside at night wasn't a very pleasant one.

The laughter subsided slowly, and I could tell the Master was keeping an eye on me. Listening as I muttered to myself. Finally his curiosity got the better of him as his deeper voice cut through the peace and tranquillity, "Sebastian, are you alright?"

"Yes my lord, I am just thinking," I replied nonchalantly.

"Oh well, what are you thinking about then?" He asked, his tone sincerely interested.

I turned my head slightly so I could see my young Master, "Oh nothing of actual importance that you should worry yourself over," I smiled, turning my attention back to the horses and the road. I hoped that would be enough to sate his curiosity, however, knowing my Master very, very well, I knew he would continue to sniff around. However I mentally pleaded with him to not ask too many questions.

"Sebastian!" he warned, his eyebrow raising over his cerulean blue eye, disappearing under his thick bluish black hair, "Tell me now."

I sighed and tugged on the reins, the horses whinnying in protest as they responded in unison. Slowing down from their trotting to an abrupt halt, turning their heads to bite at each others necks. I ignored their display and twisted so my Master could see the irritation on my face, "It would be more appropriate to talk about this when we are alone, my lord," I urged him not to press any further, hoping my clear discomfort on the subject would be enough to deter him from asking any more questions.

"Sebastian, we are alone," He muttered grumpily, crossing his arms over his chest.

I wanted to smack myself in the face, Oh Ho! How bloody funny you are today! I thought in irritation. "I meant when we are alone," I bit back, swiping a loose strand of my hair behind my ear, frowning at the man.

My Master sighed heavily, "Spit it out Sebastian. Now! That is an order!"

My eyes widened at his audacity. It had been a long while since he had given an order like that. It was rather infuriating to hear his bratty nature make itself known, when I thought it had been all but extinguished since we became mates.

"I was thinking about what you said this morning in the chambers, my lord," I spat out, turning my head and snapping the whip above the midnight black horses. The horses immediately threw themselves into a fast paced trot, jolting the carriage forward suddenly. Now I truly hoped the conversation was at its end as I was getting irritated by being questioned by the brat. Honestly after all I had done for him, just because I was thinking, for him to turn out like this, it was aggravating that he would continue to treat me in such a way. When he was a child yes, but not now. Not after what we have been through.

"What of it? I spoke my feelings, what is there to think about?" He grumbled, his voice growing in both volume and annoyance.

"Perceptive today aren't we? Haven't I told you I hate guard dogs before," I chided, willing him to just shut up, all these questions were starting to give me a headache. My head practically pulsing, which was never a good thing. I kept my eyes trained on the road, not wanting to look back at my Master in case either one of us were to say something we would both come to regret.

"Woof! Now come on, tell me what it is!"

I turned my head again, frowning at the man, "Trying to be funny now? Well trust me, Ciel, it is not going to work. I will not tell you what is wrong until we are in closed quarters," I growled. I knew my eyes flashed dangerously since I felt a twinge in my gums, knowing that if the Master kept pushing me, he wouldn't like what he would have to deal with. On the contrary, I did not actually know why I was so angry in the first place, all I knew is that I needed to direct it at something other than my Master. After all, killing him now would be so unfortunate, especially after this morning's revelations.

"I order you to tell me! I don't care what you deem to be told in closed quarters, Sebastian. We are alone, there is nobody around for miles, so bloody well get on with it," the Master demanded, his voice rising.

My eyebrows twitched angrily, my teeth gnashed together, my hands tightening on the reins. After a moments silence, I shrugged, the most disrespectful thing a Phantomhive butler could do, yet there it was. However before the bloody brat could protest any more, I shook my head and sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of my nose, "I am trying to wrap my head around what was said this morning. I know I made the same declaration and I do reciprocate the feelings entirely. But you have to understand, for a demon who is not supposed to feel any sort of feelings, it is hard for me to understand exactly what I am feeling," I tried to explain, occasionally stumbling over my words. Honestly, what kind of a butler am I if I cannot speak properly? I thought, sighing again.

My Master's hand reached up and curled around my shoulder, a small smile on his lips from what I could see out of the corner of my eye, "It's okay to not understand Sebastian. To be quite honest, I do not understand all the emotions I feel when I am in close proximity to you. It's like you take over me, jumble everything around and I just am not able to sort through everything in time to understand them. But I do know that we can and will figure it out together," he murmured, placing a quick kiss to the very little exposed flesh of my neck.
Unexpectedly, I leant into his touch, my anger dissipating slowly, "Thank you, my lord."

"For what Sebastian?" he asked, confusion set in his voice.

I turned slightly and tried to smile, "For trying to cheer me up, and for trying to understand."

My Master waved it off, his thumb working around my shoulder again, "Now please, you must sit down, I wouldn't want you to get hurt," I warned, watching as the young Master pouted and returned to his seat.

"How much longer will it be before we reach London?" He asked, yawning loudly, "I'm rather bored, and very tired."

A smile graced my lips at the thought of quiet, "Not long. We will make it to the town house just before dinner. I am sure Agni has prepared a feast for you my lord," I mumbled quietly, "You can go to sleep in the mean time. I will wake you when we arrive."

The young Master nodded and closed his tired eyes, and within minutes he was snoring quietly. Peace at last.

Ciel's prov.

I felt a pair of strong hands gently grasping my shoulders, shaking me ever so slightly. I groaned loudly, knowing all too well it was Sebastian trying to tell me we had arrived at the town house just on the outskirts of London's main city. I could practically smell the smog, even though my town house was at least a mile away from the main city, the air heavy and dark.

"My lord, we have arrived," a deep voice called. The suave baritone could only belong to that of my butler, however I wanted to play a little game, my being childish and all. I refused to open my eyes, smirking inwardly as the butler tried again.

"Ciel please, come now. Wake up," he murmured, his voice slightly strained. It wasn't his usual concerned tone which shocked me most. It was more out of irritation, like he knew my game and was getting frustrated at me for it. Yet I still didn't respond. I heard a loud sigh erupt from his mouth, I could practically see him shaking his head, his eyebrows curved over his blood red eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation. I wanted to laugh but was cut off when he placed his lips chastely on mine. This outward display of affection startling me, snapping my eyes open. Luckily the moment lasted all of a few seconds, because the moment his cool lips touched mine, they were gone moments later. Luckily no one saw since we were under the cover of twilight and there were not many people out at this time of night. Mainly because of the Jack the Ripper, even though I had solved that case six years ago with the help of Sebastian. Jack the Ripper had definitely caused civil unrest, and most definitely helped to keep people in their houses after dark, in fear that he may come back. So I guess, in a weird and unsettling way, I was thankful to the serial killer for casting fear into the people, so they did not see what had just transpired between me and my butler.

I gasped as he pulled his face away from me, his eyebrows furrowed in a frown, a blush on the apples of his cheeks as he hopped down from the carriage, setting the footstool down so I could get down with ease. My cheeks grew hot and I could no longer meet the butler's gaze so I directed it up to the town house.
The structure vast and rather like the Phantomhive manor, except this one was built with reddish brown bricks and a black slated roof. I had to say, I was rather impressed that Prince Soma and Agni had taken such great care of it, the bricks absolutely immaculate and the greyish white stairs completely spotless, not a speck of dirt on them.

"Seems they look after it better than the previous cleaner," I openly stated to the demon. He glanced at me in disapproval, he knew very well that I didn't mean him since he took it upon himself to clean the house when we stayed, but it would seem that Sebastian had taken offense. His eyebrows curving dangerously over his eyes as he glowered down at me with furious eyes. The front door swung open and a familiar violet haired, olive skinned prince darted out.

"Ciel! Oh it is so good to see you my friend! I am so glad to have you here!" He cheered, a Cheshire grin spreading across his features as he leapt down the stairs and crashed into me. Crushing his long arms around me in what appeared to be a one sided hug. His tall lean body clad in a dark blue and gold embroidered sherwani with pale cream churidars. His golden eyes sparkling in the low evening light, much like his golden earrings.

"Prince Soma. Likewise my dear friend," I greeted, patting the man's back, trying to be as pleasant as possible without telling him to get off me. Soma must have felt my rigidness as he leapt away from me, his hand flying to the back of his head and an embarrassed smile etched onto his features.
Sebastian handed the horses over to one of the servants, petting the animal's necks as they walked them over to the stable. He then stepped over to me, towering over me. His aura rather disturbing. He was clearly bristling over the fact of my pushing him and the kiss in public. His whole demeanour was off, setting me on edge. Surely he couldn't be that angry at me for refusing to wake up to his voice, could he? I shook off the feeling and allowed for the butler to enter the house, following behind with the grinning prince.

He, too, seemed to notice Sebastian's odd behaviour, turning to me, "What's wrong with him?" Soma asked, his eyebrow quirked over his golden feline eyes.

"I wouldn't have a clue. I do not tend to concern myself with such trivial things," I answered, slipping back into my 'Master' persona, "After all, it is his job to act professional all the time. If he doesn't then I will bring him up on it. Other than that he may act how he pleases. It doesn't matter to me at all." I knew nothing I had just said was true, but the butler was far away enough that he wouldn't have been able to hear me.

Once we entered the foyer, Prince Soma left me alone to go up to my room, where my luggage had already been brought up by my butler. The room was fairly large, although I preferred my chambers at home, I knew the bed here was rather lumpy and uncomfortable. The double bed took up most of the room, leaving very little space to actually move around. A large armoire sat in the corner of the room, where Sebastian was folding my clothes and placing them in the drawers, hanging my jackets and shirts.
He turned his head as I entered the room, his eyes nonchalant and cold as I asked to be changed for something suitable to wear for dinner. The butler obliged, however he was rather quiet, not speaking a single word to me. He was acting rather odd, now I thought about it. Usually when getting me changed, both before our unification and after, he would ask about my day, more often than not having to coax an answer out of me when I wasn't very talkative. However, tonight I just got silence.

"Sebastian? Is something the matter?" I asked as he added the final flourish to my royal blue tie.

Sebastian broke out of his trance-like state and smiled. The smile was rather grotesque and very forced, "I am perfectly finem my young lord. Now let's get you down stairs. I hear Agni has prepared you some of those breaded curry rolls I invented," he announced, although I could sense the edge to his voice. This newfound coldness sent a chill down my spine, he seemed to be reverting back to how he was when I first made the contract with him, making very little conversation and only just tolerating my company. This hurt me deeply as I wanted my lovable butler back, the one I spent the morning with. The one that I had built a relationship with for the past five weeks.

I sighed, turning my head away from the butler so he could not read my face as I murmured, "But you know very well I do not like..."

"My lord, I have told you many times, Agni knows you are not fond of any spices whatsoever. Therefore he endeavours to make yours as bland, yet delicious as possible," the butler explained. I glanced up into his eyes, yet there was no longer a spark. It seemed the butler had lost everything, his eyes like the dead, his voice monotone, his demeanour completely cold and standoffish.

Oh, let him throw his toys out of the pram, Ciel. There will be plenty of time tonight to find out what ails him, I thought as I was lead out of the room by my very quiet, seething mad butler.

...

The evening passed rather slowly. Nothing, not even chatting and laughing with the lively prince seemed to help pass the time. The twenty three year old prince was very vocal indeed, and demanded I tell him all of the happenings at the Phantomhive manor. Naturally, I left out my relations with Sebastian, knowing that the prince wasn't well known for being able to keep a secret, but I am sure the violet haired man could tell I wasn't being entirely forthcoming with him. However he didn't seem to mind. I did indulge on how Elizabeth and I were no longer betrothed to be married, which he thought was fabulous since he didn't really like the girl.

"She reminds me of someone but I can't put my finger on who it might be," he muttered, placing a finger on his chin, deep in thought, "She is far too loud, and clearly has personal space issues. Not only that but her personality is far too eccentric for my taste."

Agni, Prince Soma's white haired butler, snickered and pointed to the violet haired prince. Which I have to say was rather amusing, and quite naughty of the indian butler to compare his master to that of Elizabeth.

I smirked at Agni, but turned my attention back to Soma, "Yes well she can be quite eccentric. So what do you think of Sebastian?" I asked, just wanting to turn the conversation away from my cousin.

Soma glanced at me in a coy way, his eyebrows rising over his golden eyes, "What do you mean?"

"Well what do you think of him? I want to hear your opinion," I clarified, crossing my hands over my stomach and leaning back into my chair.

Soma smiled and glanced up at Agni, who had the same expression on his face, "Well normally he is very talkative and rather pleasant to be around. I quite like him, he definitely makes for a good friend," the Prince replied, flipping his violet hair over his shoulder.

I hummed, closing my eyes, "I find that he can be a very good friend. But then again sometimes when he is quiet, well I am trying to figure out whether he is plotting my death or something," I said, peeking at him. Sebastian however did not seem to be paying us any bit of attention, he completely ignored us. Only paying enough attention to serve us tea and cake in the drawing room before excusing himself to do other things.

...

Once I had had enough of Soma's company, I retired to my room where Sebastian was lying in wait. I closed the door behind me, stifling a yawn as the demon crossed the room in his long strides, and quickly removed my dinner clothes and draped them over his arm. He completely ignored my advances, brushing me off when I tried to brush my lips against his, turning his head to the side so I would only catch his cheek and not the prize I was truly after. He slipped the nightshirt over my shoulders and left me to button it up. I had just about enough of his bloody attitude today. I turned around and glanced up at the tall butler, my eyebrows curved dangerously over my eyes. Had this been anyone else, I would not have stood for this type of behaviour, however due to his earlier discomfort and general lack in cheerfulness, I was lenient with him. Well no more.

"What the bloody hell could be wrong with you Sebastian?" I growled, climbing into bed.

The butler scowled down at me, the candelabra in his hand illuminating his features, giving him an eerie glow, "Nothing is the matter, my lord. I am perfectly fine. Now if you will excuse me, it has been a long day and I wish to retire to my quarters to relax," he murmured, his eyes flashing dangerously, his pupils narrowed into slits.

Oh bother, the demon is pissed! I thought as he began to walk away.

"You are not to retire until I find out the truth. You have been quiet all evening and you are rather short tempered tonight. You have completely ignored me and you never turn down my advances, so what is wrong?" I asked, my voice adopting an authoritive tone. However by how his face darkened with anger, I immediately changed tactic and softened my face slightly, despite my own annoyance at him, "I am asking as your lover, your mate. Not your Master," I added, soothingly, hoping to God he would respond or at least give me something to hang onto. I love Sebastian, but I do not like this side of him at all.

Sebastian's step faltered, coming to a halt, his hand pausing on the door knob. Yet he still did not say a word. As if what I was saying wasn't enough for him. He was wanting more, but what else could he possibly want. I was willing to find out what was wrong with him, but he insisted on ignoring me like a petulant child.

"Please Sebastian. Please," I pleaded. God knows I would get down on my knees and beg the demon to explain what was wrong, but for now I was far too proud to do that, and no doubt Sebastian would find it repulsive.

Sebastian sighed and turned on his heel, his eyes narrowed into a glare, yet it was less angry than the one previously. His mouth curled up into a sneer as he spoke, "I wouldn't have a clue what to tell you, Ciel. After all, should you really concern yourself with such trivial things such as my problems?" He growled, emphasising my name far too much for my liking. I know that he only calls me Ciel when we are passionately intimate with each other or when he is angry, so he must be pretty annoyed at me to be using my first name.

My mouth popped open, Honestly Sebastian, you are taking this a bit far over one thing I shouldn't have said, I thought, trying to think of something to say that would explain the hurtful words I had said to Prince Soma when I thought Sebastian was not listening.

"I was adopting my master role and you know that! What I said, well, you should bloody well know I didn't mean a word of it!" I hissed, throwing the sheets of my so I could stand up to my angry demon. His gaze stuck on my face while mine travelled across his glorious form. His uniform really hides his attributes rather well, a treasure concealed within those black butler overalls. A treasure that was all mine.

Sebastian cleared his throat, his eyes now saddened, glistening in the candle light. If I wasn't mistaken, he looked like he was on the verge of tears, if demons could cry that is, Wait? Can demons cry?
"You may have been adopting your role as we had originally discussed, however you never used to treat me in such a way before Ciel. When you were a child yes. But that was because you had lost your parents, so I said nothing on the matter and allowed you to act out, better it was against me than someone you actually cared about. Yet now as an adult, you never treated me with such callousness. I should know because I am rather callous and cold hearted myself," he explained, his stoic features failing to keep up their stony appearance, "I may not have the same emotions as humans do, but I guess this is the closest I can come to saying that you have deeply wounded me by your heartlessness. You have done nothing but denounce me all day, more so when we arrived here when you were talking to Prince Soma. I thought that you would have changed towards me, even when you are acting as your 'Master' role, but you did not need to be so crass and condescending towards me. Especially after our revelations this morning."

"How was I being condescending towards you?" I growled, wanting, no demanding an explanation from him. Sebastian had never questioned how I act before, and to be honest it was rather hurtful that he saw it as little more than my being spiteful when it was anything but.

"It wasn't just what you said. It was how you said it Ciel," he murmured, shaking his head, his hair caressing his pale features. His blood red eyes had lost the life in them, it was like staring into an animal's eyes, or better still, a corpse's eyes.

A gasp left my lips as the butler bid me a good night, and turned to leave, clicking the door shut behind him and leaving me in darkness. I wanted for him to come back, yet I did not know how to even begin to apologise for hurting his feelings. Who knew you could actually hurt a demon's feelings, I sure as hell didn't. I bit my lip trying to decide what to do, yet for the time being, I guess the only thing I could do for him was to let him have some head space and figure out what he wants to do in the morning, to start afresh. I couldn't help feeling for the first time in the five weeks we have been unified, I was well and truly left on my own.

Please Review!