Chapter Four

Friday came quickly, the week slipping away with classes and working. Cagalli found herself sitting outside on her first break of the day, just watching as the leaves were slowly changing their colors and breaking free of the summer intensity. 'All things come to an end.' Cagalli sighed and pulled her knees to her chest and leaned against the side of the school watching the puffy, white smears that were scattered across the blue background. It was gorgeous outside and it was hard to believe that summer was over and winter would be right around the corner, back to the time when she'd have to throw on bulky sweaters and jeans to cover her-self up.

"Cagalli?" It was Lacus, she didn't have to look up to know that much, but yet she did out of curiosity.

"Lacus." Cagalli nodded. "How was your first class?"

Lacus smiled: it was a lovely painting that any human could watch for hours on end. "You were there, so you can imagine. Do you want to work with Kira and I on that group project?" Lacus sank down to sit next to Cagalli on her knees.

"No thanks. I think I might just do it on my own, maybe it'll help me get back into the swing of things." Cagalli nodded, a faint smile gracing her lips.

"Okay." Lacus nodded.

An air of silence hung over the two, no one said a word, and both lost in their own secret thoughts or wonder. It wasn't until Kira and Sai came around the corner did the two acknowledge that class was starting shortly.

"Are you two coming?" Sai asked, adjusting his glasses on his nose.

"Mhmm." Lacus smiled and stood up gracefully and extended a hand towards Cagalli, whom just shook her head and stood up on her own, a little less than graceful.

"Have fun in Biology." Lacus waved as they separated in the hallway, her tone pleasant and sincere.

Cagalli nodded in acknowledgement and then turned only to frown and sulk back to her class. She knew that Athrun would be sitting next to her like he did every day, and they would be awkwardly silent during note taking and she'd have to use all her power not to want to go sit elsewhere and take up a different seat. She'd resisted thus far, but it was getting harder to sit next to anybody in any of her classes, besides Kira and Lacus. Besides her brother and his girlfriend, she had no interest in speaking with others in case they brought up her living situation or her parents.

The class was quiet, everyone was sitting staring at the front and it wasn't long before she found out why.

Movie day.

Cagalli felt lighter, this meant that she'd have something to entertain her while she sat there next to Athrun. It wouldn't be such a horrible day after all. She took up her seat, Athrun was absent beside her until just after the bell went when he separated from Yzak in the hallway and jaunted into the room waving at people as he entered. He'd only been here for half a week and he'd already made more friends than she had, suddenly she felt small again.

"Good morning Cagalli." Athrun beamed, though his voice was natural and not overly cheery: just the way she liked it.

"Morning." She gave him a slight smile and then turned back to the large TV that displayed the DVD's title. 'Osmosis Jones'

Athrun was also staring at the TV, almost expecting it to suddenly start playing on its own, but something was different about the way he was holding himself today. Naturally he seemed slightly nervous around, not to say the wrong words or just to give her the space she liked between them, but not today. Sitting next to her today, he sat proudly and enjoyable, almost as if he'd gotten the best news of his life and couldn't wait to share it with her.

"What movie are we watching tonight?" Athrun finally asked, turning to face her.

Cagalli's eyes widened. She'd completely forgot about the movie night, and the fact that he would be joining them in the den on the three large puffy couches she loved to sprawl across.

His eyes were still on her, pressing for an answer with such intensity that she'd almost forgotten the question when the teacher finally started the class and the movie.

"I forget." She stated, both true due to the fact that she'd forgotten all about what was about to happen that night. She blushed and shrugged and then turned her attention towards the movie that played loudly, stopping her entire thought process right where she wanted it.

"Okay, I'll ask Kira in Chemistry." Athrun nodded, still smiling brightly.

"Good idea." She whispered back without looking at him and turned her attention back to the movie, trying hard to concentrate on the animated figures moving across the screen. Though now, her mind was in a completely different place, and she could feel Athrun sitting next to her. Intently watching the movie and being as patient and possible, waiting for the bell to go to signal the end of class.

Cagalli sat in the school on her spare, it had started raining during the last twenty minutes of her Biology class, and she was sitting in the library watching the rain through the large windows. Kira had ignored all her texts because he was in his Chemistry class, the one class that his teacher didn't tolerate talking or texting. It was depressing and she sank deeper into the loneliness of the large reading space, it was almost empty, just a few kids sat on the same level as her doing their homework before their next classes started. She tapped her pencil on the faux-wood table to a beat she wasn't familiar with and listened to the rain tap on the windows and on the roof above her. It was a sedative to her ongoing thoughts, silencing her impatience and anxiety.

Her books were scattered out across the table, and she hadn't gotten to any of her homework. It was disappointing that she couldn't even concentrate on something as simple as reading half a page of notes that she'd received from Lacus for their history class. She sighed outwardly and shrugged off her loneliness and decided to pack up her things and move to a less depressing area of the school while she waited for Kira.

Turning around the corner by the check-out desk, she ran face first into someone. It seemed to be a popular situation for her lately, always running into people, but she felt more anxious at that point than she had all biology.

"Hey Cagalli. Sorry about that."

"Athrun?" Cagalli looked up from picking up her binder and a few loose pages that had freed themselves when she'd dropped her binder. "No. I'm sorry. I seem to be doing this a lot lately. Shouldn't you be in Chemistry?"

Athrun smirked and piled on his things back up into his arms, and she looked behind him. Kira was walking through the doors of the library as well, holding two text books and a whole pile of rolled up canvas. "What on Earth are you up to?" Cagalli questioned Kira, without bothering to look back at the smiling Athrun.

"Experiment. We're going to find out exactly how all the laws work. It's our beginning of the year hand-in. I love this class." Kira smirked and continued on past them, Cagalli subconsciously followed them over to a large table further over from where she'd been sitting. Kira unfolded the canvas and spread it across the counter like a table cloth.

"Whoa. You really need that much canvas for a 'chemistry assignment'?" Cagalli bit her bottom lip.

"You bet." Kira laughed slightly and began drawing out their plan of action in pencil across the white canvas. Cagalli instantly noticed the few formulas she could remember from her grade ten science; they were all fairly simple enough. And then he went onto doodle a few things about organic chemistry and she was lost.

"So exactly what are you doing?" Cagalli peered over Athrun shoulder as he labeled a few materials that he wrote down on his lab.

"Methane bubbles." Kira sighed, without looking back at her. "If you want to help, you can."

"No, that's alright. I was just leaving. Have fun you two." Cagalli shrugged.

"Where are you going? It's raining outside. Here, take my car." Kira fished his keys out of his pants pocket and tossed them at her.

"How were you planning on getting home for lunch? And what about Lacus?" Cagalli screwed up her nose.

"Lacus's car… What? Just because she drives around with me all the time doesn't mean she doesn't have her own means of transportation Cagalli. It's fine. Go home. Relax." Kira smiled sweetly. It was so charming that Cagalli really couldn't resist her brother's offer.

"Thanks. I guess I'll see you at home. Oh and, what movie are we watching tonight?" Cagalli paused before she passed her old table.

"We've got two of them. Cabin Fever and Ghostbusters. I've got all the snacks and what not in storage. No pigging out while no one's home." He didn't look up, just kept on working with the canvas in some sort of lost dimension.

"Alright. Works for me." She nodded and before she could leave, she caught Athrun staring right at her. She gave him a little wave and then turned around and left the library and made her way home.

After school, Cagalli walked through the front door and upstairs to her room without a second thought about Kira and Lacus following her through the door. Her room was her refuge and she was tired enough from her day of classes that all she wanted to do was crash and go to sleep. Kira followed her into her room and sat on the end of her bed with a long sigh, while Lacus hung out by her desk. It was silent for a while, Cagalli just curled up with her pillows and Lacus fixed her hair in the mirror.

"Okay. I think we need to get this out of the way." Kira's tone was serious, but on the light side of the subject.

"And what would that be?" Cagalli raised an eyebrow in suspicion.

"Athrun. You don't like him very much, do you?" Kira winced as the question slipped through his lips almost carelessly.

"That's not true." Cagalli spat.

Lacus looked at her, her expression seeming to be pleased and less worried than Kira's had turned out to be. Lacus gave a little clap and a smile and moved to sit on the top of the bed by Cagalli's head, her peasant skirt puffing up around her and then settling to the bed's surface. "That's good. Athrun was worried that you had a hit man out to get him the way you look at him. We tried to assure him that you were just dealing with some difficult issues but he was so certain." Lacus gave her a pleasant nod.

"Oh, has he now?" Cagalli smirked. "Well he has nothing to worry about. My hit man went into retirement." Cagalli gave a little laugh.

"Cagalli. Cut that out." Kira shook his head.

"It's alright Kira, she's actually being funny. It's good." Lacus defended Cagalli's odd sense of humor.

"Ya Kira." Cagalli teased. "But I want to have a nap before everyone gets here. So can you two please leave." Cagalli snorted.

"Fine. See you down stairs at seven." Kira sulked away, Lacus close behind him and closed Cagalli's door politely.

Cagalli closed her eyes and let the darkness wash over her body, pulling her down into the sleep she'd come to recognize for some time now. The atmosphere was hazy and made it hard to breathe. The terrain was scattered with sharp edges and pieces of glass, dead tufts of grass and rotting animals. Cagalli felt her stomach churn uneasily as she moved out across the nightmarish landscape. It wasn't the most pleasant place for her to be, but it was sleep at least.

The landscape shifted slightly so that the sky was now a hellish black color and sharp needles of rain hit her skin. It was painful but she pushed her way through the blood-drawing shower until she found a safe haven. A hollowed out mountain that called to her: allowing her some slight comfort whilst she was amongst the land that seemed to show her no love. Inside, it was warm and dry, large and open and sitting off to the side was her Father, dressed down in his sweats and an old Harvard sweatshirt.

"I've been waiting for you Cagalli." He hummed and patted the ground next to him, signaling for her to come and join him. Reluctantly, she moved slowly through the cave towards the vision of her Father she hadn't seen in possibly over a year. "How have you been my dear?"

Cagalli sat down slowly next to him, shaking her head so that he short blonde hair stuck of in every direction just like it used to when she was younger. She felt younger, smaller too. She looked down at her hands for a split second only to find that they were covered in finger paint and she was no longer in the hollowed out mountain. Now the two of them sat in the large study they shared when he was still alive, and she'd obviously been painting on her smaller easel, not well at all.

"I'm fine."

"You're lying."

"How do you know? You're not even here anymore."

"I'm always here. You know that Cagalli. Why are you so sad?"

"Because you're NOT here. You left me, and now I'm all alone."

"You're NOT alone Cagalli, stop being so selfish. There are many people in your life that care for you the same why I loved you. Your brother for instance, is only doing what he can to make you happy. Cagalli, what have you become?"

"Daddy, I don't know. One day I'm finger painting with you, and then the next I'm sitting at your grave. You tell me what I've become."

"I don't know who you are anymore. You're a teenager, so be one. You're smart Cagalli …"

With that, the image faded and Cagalli's eyes slid open to face the darker room she was familiar with. She glanced over at her alarm clock, it was twenty to seven and Kira's friends would probably all be downstairs and she most likely looked like she'd been in a wrestling match with a dog. Slipping off the end of her bed and sitting down before her mirror, she fixed her hair and stared at her dead eyes in the reflective surface. 'What have I become?'

Alright, so chapter seven is on its way.

I'm so terribly sorry about the long wait, but with school it's been crazy hard to even get this far. Don't worry, the Ath/Cag starts soon. Promise.

Xox Kisses