Thank you so much for your thoughts and comments. This chapter is a little more introspective and Joe isn't very happy with me.

Chapter Four

The ground beneath his horse's hooves felt like it stretched on forever. As he glanced up into the night sky and barely noticed the endless stars overhead, Adam suddenly felt so very small. The hours of fruitless searching were grating on him and the faint glow of sunrise on the horizon only made him feel worse. What kind of brother was he to leave Joe out all alone overnight? It wasn't that Joe was scared of the dark. Of all of them, Joe was the one who craved other people around him. He had never known the loneliness of the trail. Or the emptiness of a room on the far side of the country. He had lived his whole life surrounded by people. His personality ensured that he was never short of a friend to find trouble with. Adam almost smiled as he thought of all the times his father had despaired of Joe's inability to go quietly at anything he did. He barreled, full-speed ahead, no matter what he was doing. It was often for the benefit of an audience and Joe reveled in making others laugh.

Adam found his thoughts turning maudlin as he wondered if he would ever hear his brother's infectious laugh again. If he would ever hear Hop Sing yell something in Chinese as Joe and company charged through his kitchen, swiping food on the way past. If they would have a happy ending with the dawning of the new day or not.

"Say, Adam, I reckon it's time we headed back and checked on the others. See if they've found anything."

Adam shifted slightly in the saddle and tried to ignore the comment behind him. The hands had been divided into search teams and Carl had elected to ride alongside Adam. Ben nodded in agreement as he knew the experienced, older man had Adam's respect and he would not hesitate to rein in the boss's son if he felt the need to.

"Adam? You hear me?"

He knew he'd been heard, but he also knew the firm set of Adam's shoulders meant he wasn't planning to agree too quickly. If it had been his kid brother they were searching for, he reckoned he'd be just the same. Still, the boss had given instructions for them to get back to the ranch and regroup by dawn. As it was, they were going to be very late.

"Adam?"

Without a word, he watched as Adam finally wrenched his horse around and reluctantly turned towards home. He could feel the heaviness in the air and chose to keep his thoughts to himself for the remainder of their ride. After all, they all liked the kid they were out searching for and nobody was under any illusions about what Harrison was capable of.

The coolness of the night gradually gave way to the heat of day as the sun climbed higher. Of course Joe had no idea where the sun was positioned, but he certainly knew it was getting hotter. The rocks he was hidden amongst radiated heat back at him from every direction in the same way his screams for help bounced back at him. His throat felt raw and he licked desperately at lips that were beginning to feel dry and brittle. Every so often he began to drag the rope that bound his wrists back and forth against the bark, but he was beginning to feel it was a hopeless task. The more he tried, the more his skin bled and the rope didn't seem to give an inch for all his efforts.

He had been relieved when Harrison first left, but now he found himself wishing the man would return and at least give him some hope he hadn't been abandoned after all. It made no sense. In the dime novels he'd read where the pretty young girl was kidnapped for ransom, the kidnapper had always made sure to keep their hostage alive, even if they were a bit roughed up. As his mind began to wander in the heat of the afternoon, he wondered why Harrison didn't seem too concerned about keeping him alive. Suddenly an alarming idea ran through his thoughts and he almost passed out when he threw his head back in fear. The lump on the back of his head still felt tender and raw and he gagged against the nausea that rose from the pit of his stomach. What if Harrison didn't need to keep him alive because he'd intercepted whoever came with the ransom money? Who would Pa send on such an errand? He knew, without a shadow of a doubt that his father would not entrust such a thing to anybody else and for a few minutes he almost choked on the image of his father lying dead by the roadside. Harrison would have liked that!

Joe felt his chest beginning to heave with overwhelming fear and he struggled to make it stop. As he pulled against the ropes, he felt his skin chafing underneath it, but his mind seemed not to care. Terrifying thoughts rode up in his mind and he found himself falling backwards into darkness once again.

Ben paced across the room, trying not to allow his agitation to awaken his middle son. Hoss had dropped onto the couch when he followed his father through the door and before Hop Sing could get food anywhere near him, he'd fallen asleep. Eventually Ben decided he couldn't stand it any longer and headed towards the door. He hadn't bothered to remove his coat or hat or even his gunbelt and he didn't even pause as he quietly stepped out into the early morning sun. It was well over an hour past sunrise and he knew that Adam would have stretched their allotted time as long as he could. Horses stood around the yard, tied to whatever rail was convenient and he felt a sense of gratitude at how many had turned out to help look for his son. Many more were searching the farther side of Virginia City and yet others had ridden the road towards Carson City. Roy had returned from the saloon as promised with many men who were willing to help. Ben knew there were times he was resented, but he also knew he was respected and nobody could ignore a missing child.

A child.

"He's not the child you left and he doesn't quite know what to make of the man who has come home. Give him time."

He leaned heavily against the railing of the corral as he considered that night once again. He'd seen his eldest son return from college and been proud of the man he'd become. While he understood Joe's reticence around his older brother, he didn't like it and he prayed it would pass quickly.

"Give him time."

He leaned into the railing and pressed his head against his forearm. The idea that his son had run out of time barreled into him and he almost gasped out loud at the force of it. Before he could pull himself together, he heard horses approaching and looked up to see Adam and Carl riding into the yard. Adam slid down from the saddle, fatigue etched across his face. No words needed to be exchanged and Ben nodded towards the door as he began to cross the yard.

"Hop Sing has hot coffee and breakfast waiting. It's time to get some rest before we start again."

Both men followed him across the open space without speaking. The hands that had ridden in earlier had all eaten and been sent off to catch up on some sleep. As much as he wanted to be back in the saddle searching, Ben knew that without rest they would get sloppy and possibly miss something. He heard Hop Sing clattering plates of hot food onto the table and he debated waking Hoss. Before he could decide what to do, the decision was made for him as Hoss pulled himself up off the pillow and sniffed the air. He would have laughed under other circumstances as his still-growing son could devour twice what many men ate at one sitting and his love of food was a constant source of teasing amongst his brothers. He climbed up off the couch and followed the rest of them to the table. It was a sombre meal with the barest of conversation as each of them tried to avoid looking at the empty chair that should have been filled by an energetic ten year old.

Adam sat staring at his empty coffee cup, as if somehow it held secrets he wished to know. When Ben leaned forwards to refill it, Adam startled at the movement.

"Sorry, Pa. My mind was off somewhere else."

With the barest hint of a smile, Ben refilled the cup and set the pot back on the table. He knew exactly where his son's thoughts were.

"You boys need to get some sleep and we'll head out again soon."

"Pa, we need to …"

Ben raised a hand to cut off the objection. "You are no use to Joe if you fall out of your saddle. A couple of hours is all I'm asking. Then we'll start again."

Adam stared at his father, every fibre of him wanting to scream his objection and yet he knew he was right. At that moment, he could barely focus on the table in front of him, let alone picking up a trail or looking for clues to his brother's whereabouts. His brain needed to sleep.

"Two hours."

"Yes, Son. Two hours."

Hoss crawled back toward the couch and dropped himself down onto it with a heavy sigh. He didn't want to be sleeping either, but he could barely keep his eyes open.

Adam thought they would be the longest two hours of his life. He dragged himself upstairs and collapsed onto his bed. Within minutes his exhausted body fell into an agitated sleep, full of images that would haunt him for a long time to come.

The sun seemed to have settled directly above his head and Joe felt himself once again drooping against the tree. He had given another halfhearted attempt at the ropes, but his arms just wouldn't move any more than an inch or so. His chin dropped onto his chest and he tried to focus on the sounds around him. A faint noise on the far side of his feet made his skin prickle. It seemed that without the benefit of his eyes to tell him anything, his ears had increased in sensitivity. Either that or his tired mind was playing games on him. The barest hint of gravel moving could have just been the wind, but he felt no movement of wind across his face. It took another minute for him to realise the sound was possibly a lizard or snake making its way across the hot gravel. His senses went into high alert at the idea that a snake was within striking distance and he almost pulled his legs up. It was probably his body's depleted reserves that held him still, but whatever the cause, Joe found himself frozen to the spot. He strained to catch any sound of movement and was just beginning to think he might have imagined it when a high-pitched squeak echoed off the rocks as gravel shifted suddenly. He'd spent his whole life on a ranch and was completely familiar with the patterns of life and death in the natural world. While he didn't wish the mouse any harm, he felt a surge of relief that the snake had found another victim besides his exposed legs. Darkness seemed to settle back over him as he wondered how long it took a snake to consume a mouse.

Carl's horse picked it's way up the steep slope and he gripped tightly to the saddle horn. Adam was a good twenty feet in front of him and he knew he was soon going to have to pull rank. The young man ahead of him was driven by a force that he could not override and the boss had told him to keep an eye on him. With good reason, it seemed. The light was fading and they would need to make camp soon before it was too dark to see and the horses stumbled in the darkness. Losing their footing would be disastrous and slow down their efforts. Unlike the night before, when search teams had ridden out, they had expected to find Joe and bring him home by the morning. When that didn't eventuate and they set out again to search further, they had taken supplies with them so they didn't need to return to the ranch.

"Adam, it's time we stopped before we lose the light altogether."

Time.

Why did that word keep coming back to bite him? There was no telling how much time Joe had before there was none left. Adam shook his head, as if to push away that thought and Carl frowned at his back. Stubborn kid!

"Adam! These horses can't keep climbing in the dark. We need to stop."

By the time they settled into their bedrolls, Adam could not stop his mind from wandering back over familiar territory. Throughout the long trek, he seemed to have pulled up every single incident from recent months where he and Joe had butted heads. He was glad that Carl had turned over to try to sleep as he could barely contain the emotion that threatened to choke him. Joe was the most infuriating person he knew. He was also the funniest. His endless practical jokes on his good-natured older brother were all recorded in the letters he had received at college. Of course, Hoss's letters had differed a little from Joe's version and he had spent many nights re-reading those letters and chuckling as he went to sleep. The initial overwhelming homesickness had barely been held at bay and those letters had been treasured weapons to keep him focused on why he was there in the first place. If only his return had been seen the same way. Joe told him he missed him in those letters. So how did it go so terribly awry when he came back and they were together under the same roof again?

Adam laced his fingers under the back of his head and stared at the stars overhead. Nothing up there gave him any answers and he finally closed his eyes. All day he had been trying to grasp at something that seemed to hide just out of reach, tormenting him until he felt he'd go mad. He knew there had to be a clue in his interactions with Harrison and his tired mind struggled to find it. The man had never intended to dump Joe somewhere and not return, so Adam figured he had to have a plan of some sort. His thoughts swirled into the ugly images he had dreamed only hours before and he tried to switch it off. As exhaustion claimed him once again, he thought he heard his brother calling his name. It would be hours later when he jolted out of the darkest dream and found himself screaming his brother's name.

As Carl grabbed at his arm to shake him awake, Adam stared wildly at the man in front of him. "I know where he is!"