1 All's Fair in Love and War
By: Soleia Nova
Disclaimer: If I did own them, would I need to write this? I rest my case.
A/N: Okay, um, I need reviews people! Pleeeezzzeeeee review. I love the reviews I've gotten so far (I almost cried, really I did) and because of popular demand, here's the nex- (is shoved out of the way by Xanade).
X: enough of her, just read more about me! (cackles insanely)
S. N.: Uh, Xan? This chapter's about Vix.
X: What? Ooh... wait 'till I get my hands on that pathetic little hyuumaaaannnn!!!! (cackles insanely).
S.N.: Uh, Zi-im...
Chapter four: Earthly Happenings
"Dib!" Exploded the shout from the first floor. "You drank all the milk again! Get you ass down here and buy some more!"
With a groan Dib stuffed his head under the pillow.
"You don't want me to come up there Dib!" Gaz bellowed once again and with a sigh, Dib climbed out of bed and headed for a quick shower. After getting dressed he went downstairs, grabbed some money from their apparently endless stash and headed to the store to buy the damn milk. On his way, he noticed a moving van in the driveway of Mrs. Luna's house. Movers were bringing lots of gold, white and green decorations and furniture into the house. With a shrug Dib continued toward the store, still wondering who was moving in. The question was answered on the way back. He had crossed the street so he could see inside the house on his way back, and had been going across the driveway when...
With a roar a motorcycle stopped just short of his right leg. The rider put one leg on the ground to keep the motorcycle up and the tinted glass of the helmet was pushed up. A pair of bright green eyes sized him up and a slightly accented voice asked:
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah. You didn't hit me. Unless of course I'm delirious with pain and can no longer feel my legs."
There was a giggle from inside the helmet as it was pulled off. The girl brushed a strand of maroon hair out of her face and smiled. The rest of her hair, honey-blond with maroon streaks and tips, swayed back into her face.
"My name's Vixia. Everyone who wants to keep all their limbs calls me Vix. You?"
"Dib. I live down the street" he turned and pointed. "The house with the- uh-oh- the very pissed off purple-haired girl in front of it."
"Issat your sister? Doesn't look very friendly to me."
"Trust me she isn't. She's also very violent when she hasn't eaten."
"Hop on then" Vix said with a grin. "I'll ride you over and make sure she doesn't tear you limb-from-limb. How does that sound?"
"Gee. lemme think. a ride to my house on a motorcycle ridden by a pretty girl. Heck, sure, why not?"
"Get on the bike smart ass" Vix said with another giggle.
Dib swung himself up onto the bike and put a hand around Vix's waist.
"You might want to hold on with both hands" she warned and gunned the engine. The bike took off like a shot out of a twelve-gauge shotgun. Dib held on for dear life as Vix popped a wheelie and drove the bike like that the rest of the way down the street. Gaz looked a bit impressed as Vix lowered the bike to let Dib off.
"Nice ride. How long you had it?"
"A little over a year. Where I'm from you only have to be fifteen to ride one."
"Cool. Wanna come in?"
Vix tossed Dib, who was standing next to the door, a quick look and nodded. She swung her legs off the bike and made sure that it wouldn't topple over (lord knows she'd have a time picking it back up), and followed Gas to the door. Dib was in the kitchen now and was opening a box of cereal when it was snatched out of his hands. He turned to see Vix glare at the box, then deposit it on top of the refrigerator.
"You guys got any pancake mix?"
"It's in the cabinet next to your leg" Gaz supplied and Dib just stared.
"What are you doing?"
"Cookin'. I figure that, since you invited me in, I should at least be a good neighbor and make you some pancakes!"
"You're crazy aren't you?" Dib said in a deadpan voice.
"Oh yes, very much so. Neat don't you think?"
Dib sighed and let Vix continue. Gaz hummed merrily and pulled out her Game Slave Ultra and started to play Alley Fighter. Vix seemed content to be there and in a short while two stacks of pancakes were set in front of the Membrane kids. Vix, hands on hips and a smirk to match said simply:
"Dig in."
"Don't you want any?" Gaz asked, feeling a bit guilty.
"Already ate. So, you guys wanna come to my end-of summer party?"
"The end of summer isn't for another month and three weeks."
"I know that! You two are getting advanced invites. Are you gonna come?"
"Sure. I could use a change in the routine."
"Dib?"
"I dunno... I think there's a Mysterious Mysteries marathon on that day..."
"You actually know what day it'll be? Jeesh that's creepy. C'mon Dib you gotta come!"
"We-ell... okay, sure. Sure, I'll come."
"Good" Vix said looking at her watch. Her eyes widened and she gulped. "Though if I don't get home soon, I might be too damaged to throw that party! Gotta go, okay? I'll see ya when I see ya!"
With that she ran out of the room at breakneck speed and they soon heard the sound of her motorcycle as it sped up the street. Once she was gone, Gaz turned to Dib.
"You know the second she figures out what a dork you are, she's gonna drop you like a bad habit."
Dib's face fell as he turned back to his food.
"Shut up Gaz."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Meanwhile on Irk...
Xanade sat up in bed to find herself sorrounded by guards. She barely managed to focus properly before she was knocked unconscious. Two hours later, Xanade awoke in a large cell, completely unable to move due to the restraints on her arms and legs. Red and Purple were staring at her through a glass and seeing them she started snickering uncontrollably. The two behind the glass shared a confused look and asked:
"What's so funny?"
The girl in the room only laughed harder and pressed a button on her wrist. The hologram shimmered away and they saw that the person in the cell wasn't Xanade at all, it was, in fact, Vim. With another giggle Vim finally quieted she gave them a slightly contemptuous look and slid her long metallic legs out of the restraints.
"You didn't really think you'd catch her did you? That girl knows you two better than you know yourselves. She figured you'd be spying on her and Zim during the banquet, but she also knew that you wouldn't spy on her if she was speaking to another female, and better yet if that other female spoke to Zim. You two haven't a clue on how complicated that girl's brain is. But I guess that doesn't matter much, because by now she, and her ship, are probably gone by now."
Red got the docking bay on an intercom. After a few minutes of angry yelling and a large amount of Irken swears, Red turned to Purple and said:
"She's right. They're gone. Zim took his new cruiser too, probably docked it inside the 'Nebula' once they were far enough away."
"Dammit!" Purple swore adding in a few more violently, and Red stepped back for fear of injury.
"Don't worry Pur. As soon as they land She'll call home. I know that much. Then we can trace the transmission and go get her."
"Fine" Purple said dejectedly. "Fine. In the meantime... What shall we do with her?"
"Torture? Death?" a sudden gleam appeared. "The planet Blorch?"
"No. No, I don't think so... Just... leave it to me. Leave it all to me."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"We did it!" Xanade screamed in delight. "I'm finally free! I finally get to do what I want when I want and HOW I want!" The girl did a little flip in her sugar-heightened happiness and turned to Zim.
"I think this calls for a celebration, don't you?"
Zim nodded enthusiastically and gave her a sly smirk.
"What did you have in mind?"
"Oh no Zimmy! Nothing like that." Zim's face fell. "At least not yet."
"I like the way you think."
"Sweetheart, you don't know the way I think."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Seven weeks later, 7:40 P.M. Earth time
Vix's stereo system could be heard all the way down the block as it pumped out techno, rock, r&b and even some hip-hop. The house was crowded over into the backyard by all the sophomores, juniors, and seniors that had come from all over. Dib and Gaz were currently commandeering the lawn chairs by the pool. Vix had disappeared for a while to replenish the chips and to set out and extra bowl so they wouldn't run out as fast. As she exited the house and walked down the back steps, she noticed something streaking across the sky.
"Hey Dib, look!" she called, knowing the boy needed a pick-me-up because his 'alien' had gone missing. "It's a shooting star!" Then she noticed that the projectile in question was getting steadily larger and seemed to be headed straight for their city.
"It's ZIM!" Dib yelled excitedly, standing up and grabbing Vix's hand. "Come on, let's follow it!"
"Gaz, watch the party for me! Make sure nothing gets ruined!" Vix called over her shoulder as she was dragged into, then through, the house. With a sigh, Gaz stood up, grabbed a bat, and headed inside to do some crowd control.
Dib and Vix meanwhile, had mounted the motorcycle and were following the ship's trajectory to one of the less populated areas in town. A smaller projectile suddenly launched from the big one and headed in the direction of Zim's old base.
"Should we follow the big one?" Vix asked, bringing her bike to a stop.
"Follow the little one! The big one is just a decoy. That's how Zim operates!"
"You're the boss" Vix said as she revved the motor. "Now hang on kid, this is gonna be a little rough!"
Vix ran the bike down a side street then did a slight jump over a small fence, and went down another alleyway, always keeping the ship in sight. It dropped suddenly, a few blocks down and Dib was now shouting directions to where Zim's base had been, Vix following almost every word to a 'T'. Soon enough she came to a screeching halt in front of a house larger than what Dib had described. It was in fact, neon green and purple, but now it was built less like a child's drawing and more like a two-story Victorian house with an attic, the roof of which was rapidly closing over a ship. Vix could feel her jaw drop at the sight of it.
"Holy Hell! That is some really freaky shit"
"Believe me now, don't ya?" Dib said smugly. "Let's wait for a while and see if Zim comes out."
As if on cue, the front door opened and a disturbingly normal-looking boy stepped out and tied a little green dog to a tree outside. The boy had very tanned skin, short, spiky black hair and overly large blue eyes. He wore a bright red t-shirt, black vest, baggy black jeans and tough-looking black boots. He looked up, saw Dib and froze for a split-second when he saw Vix, who by now had removed her helmet. He gave them a smirk and a mock salute, the smirk widening. He turned to go inside and paused, turning to look at them, one gloved hand on the doorknob.
"See you at school on Tuesday Dib!"
Then, with a slightly maniacal cackle he went inside, slamming the door behind him. Vix turned to Dib, a disbelieving and slightly scared look on her face.
"He's in our skool?" She asked, her voice nearly a screech.
"Yep, and he's trying to take over the world! Don't worry though" at this he chuckled. "He's really, really BAD at it."
"Well then" Vix said, placing her helmet back on. "I guess we have to stop him from getting good at it eh? C'mon, let's go back to my place. I have the strangest feeling that we shouldn't have left your sister in charge for so long."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Gaz? Where is everyone?"
"They had to go home" came the answer from the couch, where Gaz was playing Vix's SlaveStation 2. "They did leave phone numbers though." The goth pointed to a pile of small shreds of paper and smirked. "It was mostly guys."
Well, that's it! Finally, the next chapter is up. Don't worry, five and six will be up soon! I promise. I'm very sorry this one took so long but I've been majorly busy over the past few days. Read and review people, read and review!
By: Soleia Nova
Disclaimer: If I did own them, would I need to write this? I rest my case.
A/N: Okay, um, I need reviews people! Pleeeezzzeeeee review. I love the reviews I've gotten so far (I almost cried, really I did) and because of popular demand, here's the nex- (is shoved out of the way by Xanade).
X: enough of her, just read more about me! (cackles insanely)
S. N.: Uh, Xan? This chapter's about Vix.
X: What? Ooh... wait 'till I get my hands on that pathetic little hyuumaaaannnn!!!! (cackles insanely).
S.N.: Uh, Zi-im...
Chapter four: Earthly Happenings
"Dib!" Exploded the shout from the first floor. "You drank all the milk again! Get you ass down here and buy some more!"
With a groan Dib stuffed his head under the pillow.
"You don't want me to come up there Dib!" Gaz bellowed once again and with a sigh, Dib climbed out of bed and headed for a quick shower. After getting dressed he went downstairs, grabbed some money from their apparently endless stash and headed to the store to buy the damn milk. On his way, he noticed a moving van in the driveway of Mrs. Luna's house. Movers were bringing lots of gold, white and green decorations and furniture into the house. With a shrug Dib continued toward the store, still wondering who was moving in. The question was answered on the way back. He had crossed the street so he could see inside the house on his way back, and had been going across the driveway when...
With a roar a motorcycle stopped just short of his right leg. The rider put one leg on the ground to keep the motorcycle up and the tinted glass of the helmet was pushed up. A pair of bright green eyes sized him up and a slightly accented voice asked:
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah. You didn't hit me. Unless of course I'm delirious with pain and can no longer feel my legs."
There was a giggle from inside the helmet as it was pulled off. The girl brushed a strand of maroon hair out of her face and smiled. The rest of her hair, honey-blond with maroon streaks and tips, swayed back into her face.
"My name's Vixia. Everyone who wants to keep all their limbs calls me Vix. You?"
"Dib. I live down the street" he turned and pointed. "The house with the- uh-oh- the very pissed off purple-haired girl in front of it."
"Issat your sister? Doesn't look very friendly to me."
"Trust me she isn't. She's also very violent when she hasn't eaten."
"Hop on then" Vix said with a grin. "I'll ride you over and make sure she doesn't tear you limb-from-limb. How does that sound?"
"Gee. lemme think. a ride to my house on a motorcycle ridden by a pretty girl. Heck, sure, why not?"
"Get on the bike smart ass" Vix said with another giggle.
Dib swung himself up onto the bike and put a hand around Vix's waist.
"You might want to hold on with both hands" she warned and gunned the engine. The bike took off like a shot out of a twelve-gauge shotgun. Dib held on for dear life as Vix popped a wheelie and drove the bike like that the rest of the way down the street. Gaz looked a bit impressed as Vix lowered the bike to let Dib off.
"Nice ride. How long you had it?"
"A little over a year. Where I'm from you only have to be fifteen to ride one."
"Cool. Wanna come in?"
Vix tossed Dib, who was standing next to the door, a quick look and nodded. She swung her legs off the bike and made sure that it wouldn't topple over (lord knows she'd have a time picking it back up), and followed Gas to the door. Dib was in the kitchen now and was opening a box of cereal when it was snatched out of his hands. He turned to see Vix glare at the box, then deposit it on top of the refrigerator.
"You guys got any pancake mix?"
"It's in the cabinet next to your leg" Gaz supplied and Dib just stared.
"What are you doing?"
"Cookin'. I figure that, since you invited me in, I should at least be a good neighbor and make you some pancakes!"
"You're crazy aren't you?" Dib said in a deadpan voice.
"Oh yes, very much so. Neat don't you think?"
Dib sighed and let Vix continue. Gaz hummed merrily and pulled out her Game Slave Ultra and started to play Alley Fighter. Vix seemed content to be there and in a short while two stacks of pancakes were set in front of the Membrane kids. Vix, hands on hips and a smirk to match said simply:
"Dig in."
"Don't you want any?" Gaz asked, feeling a bit guilty.
"Already ate. So, you guys wanna come to my end-of summer party?"
"The end of summer isn't for another month and three weeks."
"I know that! You two are getting advanced invites. Are you gonna come?"
"Sure. I could use a change in the routine."
"Dib?"
"I dunno... I think there's a Mysterious Mysteries marathon on that day..."
"You actually know what day it'll be? Jeesh that's creepy. C'mon Dib you gotta come!"
"We-ell... okay, sure. Sure, I'll come."
"Good" Vix said looking at her watch. Her eyes widened and she gulped. "Though if I don't get home soon, I might be too damaged to throw that party! Gotta go, okay? I'll see ya when I see ya!"
With that she ran out of the room at breakneck speed and they soon heard the sound of her motorcycle as it sped up the street. Once she was gone, Gaz turned to Dib.
"You know the second she figures out what a dork you are, she's gonna drop you like a bad habit."
Dib's face fell as he turned back to his food.
"Shut up Gaz."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Meanwhile on Irk...
Xanade sat up in bed to find herself sorrounded by guards. She barely managed to focus properly before she was knocked unconscious. Two hours later, Xanade awoke in a large cell, completely unable to move due to the restraints on her arms and legs. Red and Purple were staring at her through a glass and seeing them she started snickering uncontrollably. The two behind the glass shared a confused look and asked:
"What's so funny?"
The girl in the room only laughed harder and pressed a button on her wrist. The hologram shimmered away and they saw that the person in the cell wasn't Xanade at all, it was, in fact, Vim. With another giggle Vim finally quieted she gave them a slightly contemptuous look and slid her long metallic legs out of the restraints.
"You didn't really think you'd catch her did you? That girl knows you two better than you know yourselves. She figured you'd be spying on her and Zim during the banquet, but she also knew that you wouldn't spy on her if she was speaking to another female, and better yet if that other female spoke to Zim. You two haven't a clue on how complicated that girl's brain is. But I guess that doesn't matter much, because by now she, and her ship, are probably gone by now."
Red got the docking bay on an intercom. After a few minutes of angry yelling and a large amount of Irken swears, Red turned to Purple and said:
"She's right. They're gone. Zim took his new cruiser too, probably docked it inside the 'Nebula' once they were far enough away."
"Dammit!" Purple swore adding in a few more violently, and Red stepped back for fear of injury.
"Don't worry Pur. As soon as they land She'll call home. I know that much. Then we can trace the transmission and go get her."
"Fine" Purple said dejectedly. "Fine. In the meantime... What shall we do with her?"
"Torture? Death?" a sudden gleam appeared. "The planet Blorch?"
"No. No, I don't think so... Just... leave it to me. Leave it all to me."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"We did it!" Xanade screamed in delight. "I'm finally free! I finally get to do what I want when I want and HOW I want!" The girl did a little flip in her sugar-heightened happiness and turned to Zim.
"I think this calls for a celebration, don't you?"
Zim nodded enthusiastically and gave her a sly smirk.
"What did you have in mind?"
"Oh no Zimmy! Nothing like that." Zim's face fell. "At least not yet."
"I like the way you think."
"Sweetheart, you don't know the way I think."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Seven weeks later, 7:40 P.M. Earth time
Vix's stereo system could be heard all the way down the block as it pumped out techno, rock, r&b and even some hip-hop. The house was crowded over into the backyard by all the sophomores, juniors, and seniors that had come from all over. Dib and Gaz were currently commandeering the lawn chairs by the pool. Vix had disappeared for a while to replenish the chips and to set out and extra bowl so they wouldn't run out as fast. As she exited the house and walked down the back steps, she noticed something streaking across the sky.
"Hey Dib, look!" she called, knowing the boy needed a pick-me-up because his 'alien' had gone missing. "It's a shooting star!" Then she noticed that the projectile in question was getting steadily larger and seemed to be headed straight for their city.
"It's ZIM!" Dib yelled excitedly, standing up and grabbing Vix's hand. "Come on, let's follow it!"
"Gaz, watch the party for me! Make sure nothing gets ruined!" Vix called over her shoulder as she was dragged into, then through, the house. With a sigh, Gaz stood up, grabbed a bat, and headed inside to do some crowd control.
Dib and Vix meanwhile, had mounted the motorcycle and were following the ship's trajectory to one of the less populated areas in town. A smaller projectile suddenly launched from the big one and headed in the direction of Zim's old base.
"Should we follow the big one?" Vix asked, bringing her bike to a stop.
"Follow the little one! The big one is just a decoy. That's how Zim operates!"
"You're the boss" Vix said as she revved the motor. "Now hang on kid, this is gonna be a little rough!"
Vix ran the bike down a side street then did a slight jump over a small fence, and went down another alleyway, always keeping the ship in sight. It dropped suddenly, a few blocks down and Dib was now shouting directions to where Zim's base had been, Vix following almost every word to a 'T'. Soon enough she came to a screeching halt in front of a house larger than what Dib had described. It was in fact, neon green and purple, but now it was built less like a child's drawing and more like a two-story Victorian house with an attic, the roof of which was rapidly closing over a ship. Vix could feel her jaw drop at the sight of it.
"Holy Hell! That is some really freaky shit"
"Believe me now, don't ya?" Dib said smugly. "Let's wait for a while and see if Zim comes out."
As if on cue, the front door opened and a disturbingly normal-looking boy stepped out and tied a little green dog to a tree outside. The boy had very tanned skin, short, spiky black hair and overly large blue eyes. He wore a bright red t-shirt, black vest, baggy black jeans and tough-looking black boots. He looked up, saw Dib and froze for a split-second when he saw Vix, who by now had removed her helmet. He gave them a smirk and a mock salute, the smirk widening. He turned to go inside and paused, turning to look at them, one gloved hand on the doorknob.
"See you at school on Tuesday Dib!"
Then, with a slightly maniacal cackle he went inside, slamming the door behind him. Vix turned to Dib, a disbelieving and slightly scared look on her face.
"He's in our skool?" She asked, her voice nearly a screech.
"Yep, and he's trying to take over the world! Don't worry though" at this he chuckled. "He's really, really BAD at it."
"Well then" Vix said, placing her helmet back on. "I guess we have to stop him from getting good at it eh? C'mon, let's go back to my place. I have the strangest feeling that we shouldn't have left your sister in charge for so long."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Gaz? Where is everyone?"
"They had to go home" came the answer from the couch, where Gaz was playing Vix's SlaveStation 2. "They did leave phone numbers though." The goth pointed to a pile of small shreds of paper and smirked. "It was mostly guys."
Well, that's it! Finally, the next chapter is up. Don't worry, five and six will be up soon! I promise. I'm very sorry this one took so long but I've been majorly busy over the past few days. Read and review people, read and review!