Sorry guys yet again for the gap between the updates. Finals are kicking my ass but they're almost over. Enjoy :)
Cliff wrapped his arm around Olivia's shoulder and followed Alex into the apartment.
"I'll umm… start the coffee." Alex said avoiding Olivia's glare at all costs.
"Good! Olivia and I can get to know each other." Cliff guided Olivia into the living room where they sat on the couch. Olivia sat a considerable distance away from him facing the kitchen as he sat down and crossed his leg.
"So, Olivia, what exactly do you do?"
"I… umm, I'm a detective."
"Oh wow, what unit?"
Olivia never liked telling people that she was in the Special Victim's Unit. It always led to either the conversation dying or the other person being way too interested and asking too many questions.
"I work in the same department Alex prosecutes for."
"Oh, SVU? How can you stand being a cop in that field? Must be rough." Cliff added with genuine interest.
"I get by. Try not to get attached, you know?" Olivia said with little interest in the conversation. Her mind was still wrapping around what she found tonight. It definitely looked like she might have walked into something that was intended to be more intimate than just a friendly coffee.
How could Alex do this?
"I know Alex does a really good job with the unit. Her conviction rate is outstanding. Sometimes I think she may work too hard. Definitely needs to take a rest. I mean, when she said she was single-"
"Single?" That snapped Olivia right out of her thought process and also brought Alex to a screeching halt in mid stride holding the three coffee mugs.
Olivia's eyes bore into Alex's as Alex looked like a deer caught in headlights.
"She said she was single?" Olivia asked not once moving her eyes to look anywhere else rather than into hers.
"Well, yeah. I mean, I really think she should consider settling-"
"I have to go." Olivia abruptly stood and bolted for the door with Alex trying to process what just happened.
"Olivia!" Alex rushed to put the mugs down to follow her.
"I have to get the hell out of here."
"Olivia, wait!"
"For what, Alex? For what?"
Olivia's sudden yelling caused Alex to stop in her place. Silence passed until Cliff coughed slightly and spoke up.
"Errm, anyone want to tell me what's going on here?"
"Can we talk outside, please?" Alex said opening the door. Olivia walked out and turned her back to Alex, not wanting to look at her.
Alex closed the door and turned to Olivia folding her arms and let the silence set in, waiting for Olivia to start. Olivia lifted her head to the ceiling and let out a long breath trying to calm herself down. Finally she spoke with her back still turned.
"Who is he?"
"He's an old college friend… that's it."
More silence sunk in and Alex started to hear Olivia's breathing… and realized she was struggling to keep herself calm.
"Why is he here?"
"I don't really think that's any of your-"
"Cut the shit, Alex!" Olivia spun around looking exasperated, "Why the hell is he here?"
"Because he is, Olivia! So what? We went to a bar and I asked him up for coffee."
"Why in the hell did you tell him you're single?"
"I didn't technically tell him I was single. I supplied information. His conclusion of that is his own assumption."
"Then what did you say to him?" Olivia asked folding her arms.
"Listen, I really don't understand why this is a problem. When I asked for a break I meant it."
"You didn't ask for shit, Alex!" You told me. TOLD me that you wanted a break and didn't even give me a real explanation!"
"First of all, lower your voice. Second of all, you know why I needed a break, Liv."
"Oh right. You needed a break because I wasn't ready to commit to you the exact minute you wanted me to. You didn't even try to work it out. You just got up and left. I didn't know your second reason for wanting a break was because you needed some dick!"
Alex shallowly gasped as she felt her stomach drop. Shocked that Olivia would even say anything so hurtful. A single tear ran down her cheek as she choked out. "I can't even believe you said that…"
"Isn't it true? Not one day passes and you're already about to make out with some guy dressed in a cheap suit in your hallway."
"You act like you're a fresh plate of fruit in this whole situation. Did you not forget that you got up and bolted the minute I even suggested we move in? I forgave you for that."
"You didn't forgive me for it. You're punishing me! You're punishing me by having this stupid break and your punishing me by having this guy in your apartment the night after."
Alex tried to stop the new group of tears flowing down her face by wiping at them furiously. "Liv, I just…"
"You know what, Alex? Forget it. I'm done. You can have your fucking break for the rest of your life. I'm not gonna fight for you when you obviously don't want to be fought for." Olivia let one tear flow down her face and didn't bother to wipe it.
Alex felt a huge lump in her throat. She felt herself shake as the realization that she was losing Olivia set in. She didn't want it to come to this…
"Liv, that's not what I want…"
"Well, you know what, Alex? It's not all about what you want all the time. I'm just… I'm done." Olivia felt herself shut down. The cement to the walls she built were almost done setting.
"Well, wait. Maybe there's a way we can work at this first?" Alex said desperately, but Olivia went unfazed.
"I asked you the same exact thing last night. You see the little it got me? Don't think this is going to be any different."
With that Olivia turned to go down the stair-well, not even bothering with the elevator, never looking back.
Alex was left in the hallway. Cold and Alone. She hugged herself to get rid of the sudden frosty tingle down her spine as a few more tears took presence down her cheek. She turned to open her apartment door, but paused. She just needed this moment to herself. Alone. Seeing Cliff inside was the last thing she wanted to deal with after the display he was just a witness to. Questions were going to come.
And answers were what she was going to have to give.
The sound of her heels echoed throughout the precinct hallway as she closed in on her destination. She could tell just by the ruckus outside that this was a busy day for the unit. She was hoping that the detective wasn't busy when she got in there. She already prepared what she was going to say, like a true attorney would. She had to get it out along with her frustration. Before she came close to the door she saw her person of interest at her desk. Perfect.
"Hello, detective." She smiled as she approached Olivia's desk.
"Hey, Serena. Long time, no see." Olivia smiled as she organized more manila folders.
"Wow, Southerlyn. I thought maybe one of us would have to die before we saw you again." Elliot let out.
"Haha very funny, Elliot." She rolled her eyes. "Olivia, I was wondering if I could speak with you."
"Yeah, sure. What's on your mind?"
"I was actually wondering if I could talk to you more privately. Maybe the crib?"
Olivia's facial expression changed as she stood up slowly and gave a glance over to Elliot who also had a curious look on his face.
"Sure. Right this way."
Olivia led her up to the crib and took a quick peek in to make sure that they were indeed alone. She let Serena in and closed the door, taking a seat on the opposite cot that Serena took, facing her.
"What's going on, Serena? Is everything ok?" Olivia asked sincerely.
Serena let out a long sigh, knowing that this conversation with Olivia was going to kill Alex, but Serena just had to know…
"Actually, I came here to see if everything was ok with you." She said putting her elbows on her knees and resting her head.
"How do you mean?"
"I'm talking about the whole Alex thing, Liv."
Olivia's expression changed instantly at the sound of Alex's name. "Serena, I…"
"Just hold one second, Liv. From the outside of things, you two really looked like you were the pure picture of love. In a day it seems like that just went flat. What happened?"
Olivia sighed and took a second to answer before she supplied, "Listen, Serena. I appreciate your concern, I really do, but this is really between Alex and I."
"She told me that you haven't spoken to her ever since that night Cliff came over a couple weeks ago and…"
"What's the deal with him?" Olivia interrupted; fascinated that Serena may know more about Cliff than she did.
"All Alex ever says is that he's an old college friend, but…" Serena trailed off, killing herself mentally for not playing that off cooler.
"But… what, Serena? Is she still seeing him?"
Serena bit her bottom lip. "I don't know the nature of their relationship. Is he still around? Yes."
Olivia suddenly took interest in the palm of her hand, scared that if she looked Serena in the eye she could tell how she really felt about the situation.
Serena put a hand on Olivia's knee to gain her attention as she spoke, "Tell me what happened, Liv." Olivia stayed silent for a moment before she responded.
"She pushed, Serena. She pushed and I wasn't ready. And she got mad over it." She still played with the palm of her hand and let out a slight sigh.
"But you two were together for over a year. I've seen people move in when they've been together less than that… What exactly are you afraid of?" Serena was then shocked to see a lonely tear run down Olivia's face.
"I just... I don't know, Serena. It's hard, that's all. Just really hard."
"Why is that? Why is moving in with the person you love more than anything so hard for you?"
Olivia visibly gulped as she answered, "I can't… I can't talk about this, Serena." She said as she slowly stood up, "I just can't."
Serena joined her and thought for a second, not willing to see Olivia like, this desperate to help.
"Well, if you ever have the urge to talk, please don't hesitate, Olivia. I'm serious." She pulled her into a hug and kissed her on the cheek, feeling how shallow Olivia's breathing was and felt an urge to just hold her. Something was going on inside of Olivia and Serena had a feeling that it had nothing to do with Alex.
Suddenly they heard the sound of Elliot clearing his throat which prompted Serena to pull apart from Olivia as she saw her quickly try to put her feelings back together.
"Sorry to interrupt, but we got a hit on the guy. Cap says we need to move out now." He said looking back and forth between the two.
"Ok, let's move." Olivia said quickly as she changed into cop mode and followed Elliot out the door.
As they were walking towards their desks down stairs, Elliot touched her shoulder to get her attention. "You and Southerlyn. You two aren't…"
Olivia gave him a look. "No. Not at all."
"Just askin partner." He said with a smirk.
Later that night, Serena found herself at Alex's apartment. She knocked on the door and took a look at her watch, suddenly wondering if maybe she came too late, but she got her answer as she heard the door unlock and saw a tired faced Alex poke her head through.
"Hey, I wasn't expecting you."
"Since when do I ask for an invitation?" Serena smirked as she let herself in, hanging her coat on the rack next to the door. She went to walk into her living room but came to a slow halt. On the coffee table were several bottles of wine. Expensive wine to be exact, and one glass that looked like it had had a field trip. "Alex, I never saw you much as an emotional drinker. Especially all this." She said as she gestured towards the bottle.
"Don't let those bottles fool you. I just took a sip out of each one too see which I want to eat with my fish for dinner." She said with a forced smile.
Serena knew the irony in what she just heard. When Olivia and Alex were together, Olivia did the majority of the cooking. Hell, she did all of it. I wonder if it's another thing she had to get used to in the last weeks… Serena could tell that Alex was hurting just by her appearance. She was paler than usual and looked like she hadn't slept in weeks.
"So… I talked to Olivia today…"
Alex's head snapped up as she was clearing the living room coffee table and seemed to freeze in place.
"You… you what?"
"Yeah…" Serena said, now not too confident in knowing if she crossed a boundary or not.
"What did you say? What did she say?" Alex said frantically.
"Listen… I think this has nothing to do with you. Her not wanting a commitment. Her bolting. I don't think it's your fault, Alex."
"Well of course it's not!" Alex said loudly, "I wasn't asking her to fucking marry me. All I wanted was to share a space with her and she ran faster than I think I've seen her run in years!"
"I don't think you can blame her either though, Alex. You said yourself that this was her first really serious relationship."
"That's not an excuse, Serena. I'm through. You know? I'm just through. All these weeks I had hope that she would come to her senses and just apologize. All the times I called her and was waiting for her to pick up and sincerely just want to start over. I was ready to take it slow. Whatever she may have wanted, but now?" Alex paced in her living room thinking about her words. "I sacrificed a lot for her, Serena. She may not know it, but I gave up a lot to make this thing work and I gladly did it because I loved her, but it seems like she just threw it back in my face."
Serena stayed silent for a minute and thought if her next comment would be out of line. Fuck it.
"Did you ever stop to think that she may have came over that night to work it out, but found you and Cliff instead?"
"So what? He's just a friend! That's it. If she's going to get threatened by every little thing…" She trailed off and thought for a moment.
"Who is he, Alex? Honestly?"
"What do you mean?"
"You know what I mean." Serena looked skeptically.
"He's… he's an old boyfriend. We dated for a while in college."
"How long is a while?"
Alex paused for a bit and answered slowly.
"To the point where I thought I was going to marry him."
Serena let that sink in and she sighed. "Wow, Alex."
"What difference does that make? He's just a friend now. It's not that big of a deal."
"A friend who's case ended a week ago and yet he's still in town."
Alex looked at Serena harshly. "Nothing is going on. It doesn't matter anyway. I'm through with Olivia."
Serena sighed and headed towards the couch to sit down, but suddenly heard a cell phone ring. She searched her pockets to get hers, but Alex waved at her.
"Don't bother. Its mine." She said as she searched for her phone inside her briefcase that leaned against the kitchen chair's leg. Without looking at the caller I.D. she answered.
"Cabot."
Elliot took a deep breath and bit his bottom lip, hoping he was making the right decision.
"Listen, I don't really know if I should tell you or not, but… Olivia's been shot..."
Christmas may be over but... I would really like reviews as presents :)