Hi everyone! It's me, your favorite Psychic Type... Mew! Well apparently Arceus wants me to review this fanfiction as part of my punishment. How bad can it be?
(One reading later...)
(Mew's fur is standing on end while her mouth is slightly hanging open and her left eye is twitching. She tries to mutter something only for a squeaking noise to come out. Finally she shook her entire body, and whimpered.)
This is-
(Mew then trembled, her tail wrapping around her body.)
ughhh- well I think it's better if you see it for yourselves.
Arceus the Critic
"3N Times Life"
So... This is a story out of pure boredom. I Thought of this in the middle of math class a few days ago when trying to solve the problem:
Solve (For n 12) (for o 15)
-4n+7o
So lets see where this goes, (First person to solve this problem correctly will get an achievement! XD)
I don't own pokemon or anything related to it, and I hope you all enjoy!
You wrote a fanfiction to get help on your Math homework!? What was asking your mom or teacher for help to much trouble? You had to throw in an idiotic plot and idiotic characters into the equation too?
(Masamune: Imbecile!)
Yes, I know it's a bad pun.
-White
It was about the time of day when I would find N reading text books, or doing some other thing that is boring. But this time, he was freaking out and speaking in some sort of math language.
"No! If 3N is negative how am I suppose to multiply it!? Let alone my self!?"
No I knew something was up... Why would he want to multiply himself? Shaking my head, He finally noticed I was in the same room as him.
Why would N even need to learn math? And where are they anyways? Is it a library? A school? A house? Some place in the woods that happens to have a desk and text books?
(Weird Al: Don't know, don't know, don't know...)
"Can you help me with this?" He sounded desperate.
"Sure, but I don't understand why you are doing math from a book, when you don't have to..." I shrugged, and he glared at me, In a sort of childish way.
"I told you yesterday... if I am going to be a king, I need to know Math, proper language skills, grammar, and-"
"N, You do know, that if you keep your self cooped up in here... you won't accomplish anything..." I sighed.
"Besides, if you want to free pokemon... why learn math Pokemon don't know math..." I said, glacing away from the older teen
"They do too! See? Just look at Zorua!" He argued. I looked back to him, and fallowed to where he was pointing. I spotted Zorua who looked miserable, covered in stickers of numbers and math symbols.
Wait, what? Did they ride the Ferris Wheel yesterday or is this some sort of Bizarro World where N is just a dreamer? Can we have a back story or some info please?
Besides, I think you need to work on your "proper language skills" and grammar before you even move onto math. Seriously:
No I knew
why learn math Pokemon don't know math...
glacing
fallowed
And why would N even cover a Pokemon in stickers?
Zorua, if you're reading this; sue the unknown author for all the Pecha Berries in the world.
"Now? What do you need help with?" I asked. sitting next to him.
"The problem is Negative three, times N but, I don't want to be times by three! Let alone NEGATIVE THREE!" He was near tears. I gave him a strange look, not completely understanding what was going threw his head, and looked at the page.
"No, the problem is five y minus, three N... for N twenty-five, for y thirty..." I say pointing the rest of the problem.
Was that supposed to be the punchline? It probably would have been funnier if White just punched N for making a big deal out of nothing.
"Well, I still don't want to be multiplied by three! I don't want there to be more then one of me!" He was holding onto his hair, almost as if he was going to rip it all out. When it hit me... he is thinking that the N in the problem is HIM!
(Mew started floating up and down quickly as if she was bouncing up and down in a chair.)
So did you punch Bizarro-N then? No? Aww...
And why is he so whiny too? He's like Bloo from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends.
(Bloo: But Frankie...)
"N... The problem is not saying to do this to your self, the letter N in the algebraic expression, is just a place holder for a number..." I say, just remembering what one of my old math teachers had told the class, but substituted some other words in... but not really understanding it that much.
(Mew then reached down under the desk and pulled out a large meter.)
This is the Dense-O-Meter. Don't tell Keldeo I "borrowed" it and that's why he's never been able to use it. Anyways, let's see how dense N is in this story.
(Mew then pulled down on the lever sticking out of the side of it, causing the needle to quickly go right.)
Okay, we're pass Ash Ketchum, we're pass Spongebob and we're pass the PHB. Congratulations! You're as dense as Jar Jar Binks!
(Confetti starts falling from nowhere as Mew tosses aside the device, creating a loud crash. She then looked over at it and muttered.)
At least Keldeo won't want it back now.
"So?... there isn't going to be a bunch of me running around?..." He suddenly lessoned his hold on his hair.
"No," I said, in a sympathetic voice.
How old is N in this anyways? In Black and White 2 all he talked about were formulas and in this he can't even grasp basic algebra.
(Mew then looked down with a sheepish smile.)
I'm not saying I can but I would expect a little more out of him.
"..." He was silent for a moment.
"Well can you teach me to do that!? Cause the more of me there are!, The easier it will be to help my friends!" He said standing up. I sighed. This was hopeless.
"N..." I said, and put my hand on his shoulder. "It's not possible..." I said sternly. But he kept ranting on, and, on, and on.
"Fine! Wast your life doing the Math to make something that could actually do that!" I yelled, throwing my hands in the air, and walking out of the room.
Well, finally I'm don- Oh no. There's one last part.
Turning to Zorua, I smiled, and he smiled back.
"I think it worked, what about you?" I asked, and he started to jump around, yipping happily, witch was his way of saying yes. Smiling again, I reached down and pat him on the head.
"At least now, she won't come in here as often." I said, but not to sure I meant it.
That's the punch line!? This entire thing was a ruse to get White to stop visiting you in the vaguely described "here"!? What did she do to deserve that!?
Not only did you completely butcher N's personality you've turned him into an idiot and a jerk.
(Weird Al: But that's not all, you also made yourself look like a jerk in front of millions of people.)
At least this awful Fanficiton is over. I have to go wash my paws of this.
Credits:
Samurai Warriors
"Weird Al" Yankovic - Smells Like Nirvana
Zorua Reviews
Keldeo the Critic- Season One
Spongebob Squarepants
Dilbert
Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends
Pokemon Black/White 2
"Weird Al" Yankovic - I Lost On Jeopardy
Note from the Author:
I'm sorry about not providing any information about the story other than the name, but it would seem that the Author took it down. Perhaps they read my original review and took it down. Perhaps not. Either way if anyone can tell me the name of the author I'd be grateful. I personally think it might be Fafar, but I'm not exactly sure.