A/N: Hug and cupcakes to everyone who's alerted/favorited/comments on/etc. this little fic. Those e-mails make me grin like a crazy person. And they keep me motivated to keep writing (instead of doing work at work) instead of staring out the window (when I should be doing work at work).

C3

It was a Thursday in early October when the verbal battle occurred.

Bella was surfing the net on her phone before biology. Her mind wasn't on the upcoming class. It was on her birthday at the end of the month. It was the day before Halloween. It also happened to coincide with The Voodoo Experience, the weekend long music festival in New Orleans that she and Jasper went to every year. It was the one weekend a year that Bella cut completely loose. That meant smoking her brain with Jas, taking in all the amazing music she could, and drunkenly running amuck in the Quarter. Since they had turned thirteen they made the trip down to spend the weekend with Jacob Black, a dear family friend, who didn't really care what they got into as long as they didn't get injured, arrested, or dead. She was taking a look at the band lineup when Edward slammed his books down on the lab table making her jump. She spared him a glance.

"You know having my little sister feel sorry for you isn't going to make you worth anything around here. You're Scholarship. That's all you're going to be." He said, scowling at her.

For just a moment Bella was in shock. She had never had someone whom she'd had so little interaction with speak to her so disdainfully. The shock was gone as quickly as it had come over her and was replaced with rage.

"Listen, douchebag," She growled at him. "I don't give a fuck what you think of me. I don't give a fuck what your friends think of me. I'm here to go to school. To get an education. One that I earned. And as for Alice, I'm not terribly you two are actually related because she's a decent fucking human being."

Edward's eyes nearly doubled in surprise. He didn't even have time to blurt out a reply before she went on.

"Now here's the deal, you don't talk to me and I won't talk to you. We can silently get through this class and I won't have to break your pretty boy mouth. K."

Edward was still staring at her in shock.

"I'll take as you agreeing." She gave him a curt nod and looked back down at her phone ignoring him.

Conveniently, Banner made his appearance signaling the beginning of class. Bella was glad. Her heart was pounding and she wasn't sure she would have been able to keep up the tough girl façade had Edward finally gotten out a reply. Most likely the tears that had threatened would have spilled down her face. Then she would have been shark bait. All the snobs would know she was an easy target. The way it played out was perfect. Now they would think she had a spine of steel. Now she could just replay the stunned look on his face in a continuous brain loop. One where she could shamelessly be amazed at just how shockingly green his eyes were.

** FVP **

2:45 – CODE RED!

The text was from Alice. Jasper didn't even want to imagine what kind of catastrophe she was cluing him into.

2:46 – what's up gorgeous girl?

2:47 – my bro + bell = major verbal brawl in last period.

Jasper groaned. He knew this would come eventually. From everything Alice had told him about her brother and from everything Bella had said about their mutual scorn he was pretty certain it would be ugly. But what he was more curious about was how Alice already had intel when the period wasn't even over yet.

2:48 – fallout will be epic. will proceed directly to changs. and how exactly are you privy to this information in what seems to be realtime?

2:49 – I know everything handsome boy.

He couldn't help but grin. His mini goddess did seem to know everything. She knew how to sit without chattering her head off like most girls. When she spoke, she really had something to say. She knew that it would take him forever to make the first move. She had slipped her hand into his as they left her school the second time they hung out. She knew without asking that his sleep pattern was completely jacked. She had called him at 3:07 on a Thursday morning because she knew he needed some company. She had also known about the sweet spot on the back of his neck that turned him into a shivery mess whenever she passed her nails, or better her mouth, over it. Whenever she wanted to bring out the lust beast in him that was exactly where she started.

And did the lust beast want to come out in full force. Jasper was used to having girls. Between the lanky frame, the long blonde hair, and the smile he'd never had any problem pulling a piece ass. Things were different with Alice. It wasn't that he didn't want to strip her down and explore every inch of her tiny frame… he just felt his usual tactics were far too vulgar. For instance pre-Alice his last conquest fell into bed with him after he had whispered "I want to taste you" in her ear. He couldn't picture Alice falling for that. And really, he didn't want her to have to fall for anything. He just wanted her to want him as much as he wanted her.

** FVP **

Douchebag. It wasn't like Edward had never been called a douche before. That was the kind of shit the guys said all the time. Hey, douchebag, where we lighting up after school? But no one had ever spit the word douchebag at him with such venom. In fact he couldn't think of a time when a girl had ever hurled insults at him.

He should have been offended. He should have snapped back and called her a scholarship slut. He should have asked who she sucked off to get in. He should have told her she was a raging bitch that needed to get off the rag. All of these comebacks plus a hundred more came to mind as Banner rattled on. However, while she was verbally bashing him all he could do was watch the pink build in her cheeks. He had no idea why his mind had wondered down that particular path but the rising color made him wonder what she looked like after sex. He wondered if her cheeks would be just as pink. He wondered if the color spilled down her chest. He wondered what it would be like to watch her get all out of breath and chest heaving while she was riding his dick. And instead of putting her in her place with a snappy comeback he just sat there staring. Like a douchebag.

He pounded his head back on his pillow. He had wanted a round two confrontation that afternoon. He tried to catch her in the hall for a high profile verbal smackdown but she had hauled ass out of the classroom. Then Alice had been waiting outside the door. She linked her arm through his and dragged him off in the opposite direction rattling on about how she wouldn't be around this weekend. Edward had only half listened as he tried to keep eyes on ScholarshipBella. But she was quickly lost in the swarm of kids eager to get the hell out of there for the day and Alice was still talking. By the time Alice's phone rang, freeing him from her grasp he'd lost his chance to reclaim his nastiness superiority. Now, lying on his bed contemplating the whole thing he was pretty sure Alice had derailed him on purpose. That brat had disappeared almost immediately and still wasn't home yet. No doubt she was off with his arch nemesis and her sidekick. He chuckled at the thought of having an arch nemesis and wondered if he needed a cape.

He was still lying in bed, now idly clicking through late night t.v. when he heard the knock on his door.

Alice poked her head in and smiled at him.

"Hi." She said, coming over to sit down next to him.

He arched an eyebrow at her.

"You set me up," he accused with no real malice in his voice. As much as his sister exasperated him, he still found it virtually impossible to be angry with her.

"You were mean to my friend," his sister replied wrinkling her face at him.

"Hey, she's the one who cursed me out," he exclaimed.

It was her turn to arch an eyebrow.

"Who started it?" she asked.

Edward glanced away as he shrugged.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," Alice sighed. "Why do you insist on being such a dick?"

"Alice, she's just not –"

"Oh my God, seriously? More elitist bullshit?" she shook her head. She gave him a pitying look. "Are you ever going to grow up, Edward? Are you ever going to see the world is so much more than your social bubble?"

"Alice –" he began.

"No, Edward. No," she said shaking her head. "You're going to leave her alone. I know you were desperate to be Mr. Big and Nasty today but you're not going to do it. You're going to leave my friend alone. I know you have to be the hotshot asshole at school. You have to uphold your precious reputation but you will not hurt my friend. You will not call her names, you will not do mean things to her, you won't even talk to her. I like her, Edward. I will not see my friend hurt or upset."

His sister drilled into him with her eyes. She knew when it came down to it Edward would do anything for her. As much as it hurt his pride to let it go he decided he would.

"Fine." He said rolling his eyes.

Alice beamed at him and then pulled him into a tight hug.

"There's a lot of good in you Edward Cullen. I just wish you wouldn't bury it so deep."

He could help but smile.

"Oh, and Mom knows about this weekend but she said not to tell Dad or he would worry way too much." she said snagging the remote from him.

"This weekend?"

"Uh, yeah," Alice said with a patented teenage girl huff. "I told you earlier. But apparently your head was too filled up with revenge plans to hear me."

"Yeah, yeah, what's this weekend?"

"I'm headed to New Orleans with Bella and Jasper." she said, her eyes on a ridiculous commercial for a Shake Weight.

"What?" Edward said snatching the remote out of her hand and muting the nonsense on the television.

"New Orleans. Voodoo. Weekend." She replied. "The concert I told you were going to for Bella's birthday."

"Are you fucking kidding me? You think you're going to New Orleans with a drug dealer?" He cried.

"I don't think anything." She said calmly. "I'm going. And don't call my boyfriend a drug dealer. I don't like that phrase."

"He sells weed to half my friends!" Edward exclaimed. Another Alice Headache was beginning.

"What what does that say about your friends?" she asked with a smirk.

"What tha… that doesn't fucking matter. Point is there's no way in hell I'm letting you run off to New Orleans with those two!"

"Aww, it's really cute how you act like you could stop me." she told him with a defiant smirk.

Edward knew that much was truth. Sure he could tell their dad but she could sucker him in no time. And even if their parents did say she couldn't go, she'd find a way around them. Alice determination was like no other determination. But there was no way he was letting her traipse off with a drug dealer for the weekend. No way was some drug dealer fucking his sister.

"Fine then, I'm going with." He declared.

"Yeah?" Alice asked with a laugh. "You plan to follow me around? Or you gonna lowjack me?"

"Alice, it isn't fucking funny! That kid could be dangerous." He exclaimed. He was getting frustrated. It was like she wanted to drive him crazy.

"Wait, I got it, you could just ride with us!" Alice was gasping laughter now.
"Fine," he replied.

"I was fucking around, Edward." Alice said, recovering from her giggles quickly. "There's no way you're coming with us."

"Well, here's the deal baby sister," he said with a smug smile. "Either you can bring your big brother along or I'm going to text you every 5 minutes and call you every 10 minutes. And, Alice, you know I'll do it."

Alice stared at her bother with her mouth gaping out. It was rare that her brother's protective streak kicked in but when it did it was fierce. She had no doubt he would do exactly what he said.

"Edward, not that I don't appreciate the outpour of brotherly love and protection, but seriously, you're not coming along. I'll be fine, I'll check in with you like ten times a day."

He was unappeased.

"Every 5 minutes and every 10 minutes, you'll be able to set your clock by it. And if you shut off your phone I'll call the police and tell them you've been kidnapped."

Alice gritted her teeth.

"You're being ridiculous."

"I'm being a big brother."

"I hate you."

"Still your brother."

"You fucking suck."

"Still your brother. Hey, how long is the drive?"

"You're a despicable person." She huffed throwing the remote at his chest and jumping to her feet.

"Make it happen, Alice." He said rubbing the spot where the remote had hit him but smiling still.

"You know this means you'll have to spend your entire weekend with Bella. And probably plenty of her low income friends." Alice taunted.

Edward's smile wavered a bit. He hadn't quite considered that. Alice could see the wheels in his head turning. A self-satisfied smile began to creep across her face. Edward noticed immediately.

"A big brother's gotta do what a big brother's gotta do." He said with a shrug.

With a dramatic groan Alice lurched out of the room