When I wake up, I'm inside his car. It smells like cigarettes, menthol lights. I look over, just as we come to a stop light, and he lights up. He looks over at me.
"Want one?"
He smiles at me. I feel too tired to answer. I close my eyes and shake my head. I'm feeling really sleepy. I hear the leather shift as he leans over and grabs my face, holding my chin up. I open my eyes. I'm staring right into his eyes, they're so beautiful. The brightest green I've ever seen. He kisses me, and I can feel the smoke pass from his mouth to mine. Lucky me, I've at least smoked a couple of times before, and my my boss Cross smokes at least a pack a day, if not more, because otherwise, I would have choked. He breaks the kiss and moves away from me. I have no idea how long we've been driving or where we could be going. He rolls down the windows. I close my eyes. I can't keep my fucking mouth shut though. I feel really strange. I said something stupid like "I need you" or "I want to be with you too." I don't really remember. He didn't say anything, he just grabbed my hand, squeezed, and then let go again. He just kept driving and I fell asleep again.
When I wake up this time, I hear footsteps coming towards me. I sit up quickly, and throw blankets off of me. Lavi's standing beside the bed. This room looks similar to the one I woke up in this morning. All the furniture is ultra-modern, but the color scheme is very organic. Browns, light beige, and teal blues cover the walls and wooden furniture. What place is this?
"Where are we?"
"This is my business loft."
My attention isn't on where I'm at anymore. I look at Lavi up and down. He isn't wearing much. A long sleeve pajama shirt, and these really cute briefs...
"Are you OK?"
He sits next to me on the bed and rustles my hair.
"You had me a little worried when you wouldn't even wake up to get out of the car. But you were still breathing, so I figured you we fine."
He kisses my hair and pulls my face close to his. He's acting like we're lovers already. Suddenly all those questions that I didn't finish asking come out all at once.
"Is the guy that texted me this morning really your boyfriend?"
He laughs at me again.
I look away from him quickly.
"Oh. Kanda? My boyfriend? Hm."
He gets off the bed, and moves across the room, towards the large windows that look the same as the in the place I woke up in this morning.
It's raining again.
"No. Kanda and I were an item once, but only because we look so damn good together. He's a fashion model you know. His manager and my producer set it up, it was just good for business. "
Before he can turn around to look back at me, I'm up and off the bed. I close the gap between us quickly, and throw my arms around him. It feels so wonderful to embrace him. Then I remember he isn't wearing any pants...
My body feels like its moving on it's own. I don't know what I'm doing.
He pulls me close to him.
"Why did you leave this morning? You could have stayed, you know. It would have made things a lot easier, at least."
"I'm sorry..."
I feel like I could start crying, again. What the hell is my problem today.
"I don't usually go out an party with anyone from work. It's not that they don't invite me or anything, it's just..."
"Not your thing?"
"Yeah. And well, usually it's hard for me to get into places like that. It's a hassle, so I don't go often. My friends say they don't mind, but I'd just rather not honestly"
"What do you mean its hard for you to get in?"
"I'm underage."
He's got this really weird look on his face now. I think he's in shock.
"H-how much underage?"
He can't even form a correct sentence. He's in shock.
"I mean, how old are you exactly?"
He's starting to scare me.
"It's not as bad as you think I swear. It's not like I'm 14 or something, you know."
"Yeah, but underage for a nightclub..."
I look down and realize I'm not wearing my own clothes. These must be his, the shirt is kind of oversized, but longer than anything I would wear, since he's taller than me.
"D-did you change my clothes?"
I'm seriously starting to freak out.
"Look, just tell me how old you are!"
I think he's freaking out too.
"Jeez! Relax! I'm 17, OK?"
"Oh thank god..."
"WHAT?"
"It's just that..."
I can't stop it from coming out, I didn't choose my words carefully at all.
"Did we have sex last night?" I stammer out, really awkwardly.
"No. I promise, we didn't get that far."
"So, how far did we get...And why did you bite me?"
He starts to laugh, but stops. He avoids my question.
He pushes me back, walking towards me so I keep taking steps back, until I feel the bed behind me. He keeps getting closer. I sit down on the bed. Before I can do anything to stop him, he pulls my shirt off. My bare skin gets cold quickly. He pushes me back on the bed, still just standing there, staring at me. He crawls on top of me. My hear is racing. He strokes my face, caresses my hair, and gently kisses me. I close my eyes. We start to make out again, but we hear footsteps, and both look up at the same time.
Looks like we've got company. A person I swear I've seen somewhere before stands before us. He's totally gorgeous, with a slender figure and long, dark black hair. He's wandered in nonchalantly, and doesn't seem to care that he's clearly interrupting something intimate. Lavi leans off of me, just a little bit. He stops in the middle of the room, close to the bed. He stares at me, then at Lavi.
"Is that the kid from last night? You're kidding me, right? Seriously? He's like, 12. You're a fucking pedophile." The gorgeous guy laughs a little bit, and then looks disgusted. He stares right at Lavi.
"No really. Are you into that sort of thing now. I know you've been acting like a totally retard since we split up, but this is pretty stupid, even for you." He covers his mouth as he laughs again, and walks over closer to us.
He's taller than Lavi. He has beautiful long, black hair, and sort of piercing, ice berg colored eyes. I'd admire him a little more, but I'm totally confused.
Lavi moves off the bed, and moves toward the other guy.
"Tell me you miss me." Then Lavi kisses him. He puts both hands on his face, and kisses him right on the mouth. The other guy's expression stayed the same the whole time, but as soon as Lavi pulled back, he slapped him across the face. He used his long sleeve shirt to wipe his mouth.
"That's disgusting! What the fuck is your problem? You stupid-"
This must be Kanda.
"Kanda, what's wrong? I could have sworn you loved anything that tasted bitter."
Confirmed.
"You stupid son-of-a-bitch."
Lavi's got this great smile on his face. He's clearly gotten the best of him, and Kanda knows it.
Kanda looks over at me, his gaze is angry, but fleeting.
"You were such a waste of time. Fuck you, and fuck your brat. Do whatever you want, I don't care anymore. You're such an awful fuck."
He turned and left as quickly as possible, slamming the door on his way out.
Lavi just stood there for a while. He didn't look at me or anything else. He just stared at the floor. He stayed like that for a long time. Then, he got back in bed with me, but he just lies next to me this time. I turned towards him, and we stared into each others eyes. He's not a cheery as before. I don't know what I should do. He moves his arm us and just rubs my face.
"You're so cute."
"So, we really didn't have sex last night? "
"...No."
"A-are we...going to?"
I feel like such a child all of a sudden. Did I really have to ask something like that?
He just lays there, staring up at the ceiling. He didn't say anything.
I get up and move over him, and straddle him. I'm just sitting on top of him, with ho shirt. I place my hand on his chest. It's really odd actually. He's wearing a long sleeve shirt, and briefs. And I'm not wearing a shirt at all, but I have pajama pants on. I rub his sides a little, then move my hands under his shirt. He jolts a little, because it's freezing in here, and my my whole top half is really cold. I move my hand over his hard, muscular and flat stomach. I press down a little, and he breathes out. I work on moving my hand down, now that I know what he's like under the shirt.
"Are you really 17? How old are you really?"
"How do you know I'm not `17?"
"I just do. Tell me the truth."
"Old enough."
I move my hand down a little lower, to the band on his underwear, and he grabs me and hold my hand tightly.
"I'm serious. I'm not kidding. Kanda may be a dumb bitch but he was right about one thing. You do look like you're 12. And while I don't mind kissing you, I'm not up for going to jail. The press would have a god damned field day with something like that. I'd definitely be out of work."
His eyes meet mine and suddenly I can't move. I want to get off of him and just leave. Maybe that's what I should have done.
I'll press my luck.
"I'm 17."
"Liar. You think I didn't look through your stuff last night. I already know exactly how old you are. That's exactly why I didn't take advantage of the situation last night. You passed out and I look through your wallet. Think of it as a mini background check. Any guy that comes home with me gets one."
"I need to thank you, for taking care of me. You, you didn't even have to do that for me, last night."
"Really, there's no need to thank me. It started off as something really selfish. But the more I was with you, the more I realized I was falling for you."
"But we..we've never even met before last night. It's that crazy? You brought me home and, you didn't have to. I-"
"Look the questions from earlier weren't because I didn't notice. Everyone could probably tell you're underage. You don't act like the older kids, but in a good way. I just wanted to see if you'd tell me straight up."
"Does it change anything, that I didn't?"
"Not really."
I move to get off of him, but he puts his hands on my hips and pull me back down. I'm sitting right on his lap...
"It's really cold in here."
I try to move again, and brush against him, and I can feel how hard he's getting beneath me. I guess my being underage didn't change his true intentions.
"You never told me all of what happened last night."
"Because nothing really did happen. You were drunk and I wasn't proud of what I was going to do with you, but I was looking forward to it. We fooled around, I bit you, then you fell asleep. That's it. I checked your walled and was super glad I decided not to jump into anything last night. I was still sorry you were gone in the morning, though."
I felt really awful about leaving, all over again. I felt horrible.
"Look, I know how old you are, and even if it's 'under willed consent', we still can't legally do, well, anything. I can barley get away with kissing you."
"Don't we have a way around that."
"Like what?"
"We both just keep our mouths shut."
I let my fingers trace the top band of his underwear, again. He grabs my wrists, and I let got of his briefs. He taps my legs, and as I lift up off of him, he arches his back moving his lower half upward, and pulls his underwear off. He pulls me to sit back down on top of him, now that he's naked underneath me. He stretches up and I help him pull his shirt off. I still have my pajama pants on. I can feel him, rock hard, beneath me. He's pressing into my pajamas. I put my hands on his stomach, and he grabs me and pulls me down on top of him.