Harry Potter and the Sketchy Resorts

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Potterverse.

Author's note: Many thanks to my betas Cassy and Jesternz.

WARNINGS: Nudity, Innuendo, AU

Second Author's Note: I have received requests for translations for the French in these chapters so I will add translations at the bottom of each chapter with a new word or phrase.

Chapter 4

Fleur smiled as she took her seat on the airplane, "Ah, Harry. Just being on a plane heading to France makes me happy. Even if it's not going to my hometown."

"What is your hometown Fleur?" Harry asked. They were sitting side by side in first class on the way to Orly airport where they would transfer to a flight heading to Béziers Cap d'Agde Airport.

"Marseilles," she replied. "One day you should come visit me there Harry. You will enjoy it so! Everything from the food to the weather is so nearly perfect as to make you cry when you leave. I will take you all around and show you everything!" She turned to him smiling and saw him blush. She smirked, "Ah, Harry I think you are the naughty thoughts, yes?" She didn't wait for a reply, she just nodded and said, "Good! Maybe they will loosen you up. You are far too tense. You need to, how you say, vent some steam? No, that is not exactly it I see from your expression but still you get the gist, yes?"

Harry nodded, "I understand. I do relax you know. Every time I'm flying on my broom it relaxes me."

She nodded, "Well you won't be able to fly at the resort but I hear that the spa is excellent. Since we need to go there anyway we might as well get something out of it. You will like the massage I think."

Harry looked around, only a few other people were in first class with them and none were close. Still he lowered his voice to say, "You think he might have hid it there?"

She made a flicking gesture then replied, "I instructed my family's travel agent to find out what rooms he had and where else he went if possible to do without pressing too hard. She reports that it was fairly easy once she said he had told her of his trip and we had liked it so much we wanted to do the same."

Harry wanted to ask if she had just cast a privacy spell but if she hadn't asking would be bad. He thought a bit then asked a different question, "So since Reg went to the spa we're going to have to go too?"

She nodded, "Oui, so I plan to enjoy it."

Still unsure of whether they were secure or not Harry kept his conversation to more normal topics for the rest of the flight. At Orly airport they went through customs which was a first for Harry. Afterward Fleur steered him to a cafe where she bought two croissants and two small travel cups of coffee, "Here, take one Harry. I thought you should try a real French croissant and at least passable French roast coffee."

Harry nodded, and took a bite of the croissant. "It's very good," he said.

She smiled and led him to where they would be boarding their next flight. As they sat to wait for their flight she said, "From here on in just ask me if you need anything translated. I think most of the staff will speak English but there will be signs and such like and we may need to talk to other guests or check out the town."

Harry smiled at her, "Thank you. I'm hoping we find it in the room the first day but I'm happy you'll be able to translate for me."

"Even if we do find it that first day we cannot just leave," she replied. "We are booked for two weeks at each place to make sure we have enough time to search thoroughly and it would look funny to book two weeks and leave after a day. We want to avoid standing out too much in memory yes?"

Harry shrugged, "I don't know if it's necessary but I guess it would be nice." He sighed, "I guess it can't be helped."

She nodded, "And since it can't be helped why not try to enjoy it?"

"I don't know if I can," Harry said honestly. "But I will try."

"Bon," Fleur said and that was the last they spoke of it until they arrived at their destination. Once they had left the plane and collected their baggage Fleur rented a car and after calling for directions she drove them to the resort.

Harry gaped as they passed people, both male and female, wearing only sandals and hats as they strolled through the streets. "I don't see anyone wearing more than a bikini bottom anywhere!"

Fleur nodded, "I am almost as surprised as you are ma ami to see that the rumors I have heard are for once exactly right! It is not just the beach that is nudist. It is the whole town!"

Once at the resort they gave the keys to a valet and Fleur checked them in. Since the entire exchange had been in French she turned to Harry and said in English, "We are on the top floor Harry. Follow the bellhop."

They both followed the man with their luggage and he led them to a very luxurious room. Harry was relieved to find two bedrooms but decided not to say anything.

Fleur said, "Let us check this room thoroughly first." She pulled out her wand and started casting detection spells. Harry followed suit and soon they had cleared the whole suite of rooms.

"I guess this means we have to go outside," Harry said.

Fleur smirked, "I have never met a man so reluctant to see me naked. Even the men who liked men have been merely indifferent while you are actively trying to avoid it." Harry stammered out an apology and she said, "I accept your apology. In truth we do not have to leave the hotel yet. We should check the rest of the hotel. Or you should at least. When you cast the spell it reaches far enough to clear a suite from outside. Mine isn't strong enough and we certainly can't go knocking and ask people to let us in to cast spells."

Harry smiled, "Well if I have to postpone showing my bony white arse in public then I guess I think I can contain my grief." He pulled out his wand again, "Are you coming with me? You can keep an eye out so I don't get spotted looking like a loony."

Fleur smiled, "D'Accord. I will come along as look out."

Harry his luggage in one bedroom and then left followed by Fleur. He went as close as he could to the wall on one side and stopped at each door to cast the detection spell. Each time he cast it he got a negative response. Once done with one side of the top floor he moved to the other side and repeated the process.

"No luck on this floor," Harry said. "Let's go down the stairs and do the next floor."

She nodded, "And the next, and the next until we find it or prove it's not in the rooms of the hotel." He nodded and they started down the staircase.

'Well it's not here," Harry said. "Should we try the spa next or the town?"

"We are booked into the spa starting tomorrow so no reason to go today," Fleur said. "However you are omitting one choice."

Harry blushed, "I thought we'd leave the beach until last."

"If you wish," she replied. "I guess it will help to do this one step at a time. Shirtless in town, then wearing a towel in the spa, then the plage naturiste. First let us eat though. After all that walking plus five flights of steps down and then back I have worked up quite an appetite!"

Harry nodded, "Sure, let's go to the hotel restaurant and see if they are serving. If not we can find some place in town I am sure."

The dining room had stopped seating for lunch and wouldn't be serving dinner for two hours so then decided to find someplace in town. They went back to their suite first to change. Harry showered, more out of procrastination than anything else and put on boxers followed by cargo shorts. He picked up clean socks and hiking boots to go with them on out in the living room of the suite then looked at the door to his bedroom and sighed. He sat on the bed and put on his socks and boots. He made sure he had everything he would need, including his wand in a holster that made the wand and itself invisible, then squared his shoulders and left the bedroom.

Fleur clapped when he left the bedroom shirtless. Harry looked at her, saw she was topless too then blushed and looked away. "Bravo Harry!" She said. "Now let us make our way to a restaurant for dinner."

Looking fixedly at the door Harry said, "Will you order for me? I have no idea about French food. And I doubt I'll be able to read the menu."

"Certainly Harry," she said. "It will be my pleasure to introduce you to French food but didn't you try any during the year of the tournament?"

He nodded and left first, trying to stay ahead of her, "I tried one cold soup that I didn't like, and something Hermione called Quiche Florentine that I did like. I would have tried the bouillabaisse but after you came over for it that time Ron never let anybody have any in the hopes you might do it again."

Fleur's silvery laughter rang out at that, "Poor boy, my allure seems to hit him harder than most." She realized what Harry was doing but decided not to call him on it yet. "Maybe we can order that quiche for you," she said. "Although it is peasant food and we should start you off with something that has more flair."

Pressing the elevator button Harry said, "I'm willing to trust your judgement. I'm sure whatever you order will taste great."

"Merci, Harry," she said. "I will do my best." As she got into the elevator she noticed he was studying the walls rather than look at her. She was wearing something similar to him actually, shorts over hiking boots with thick white socks. She decided that maybe this place would be good for him. In the meantime she would make sure he didn't bump into lamp posts because he was trying not see all the topless and naked people.

Once outside the hotel she led the search for a good restaurant. Picking one by the heavenly smells coming from it. They were seated at a cozy table by the wall with a candle in the middle of the table providing most of the light. She noticed Harry had no trouble looking at her in dim light and pleased to see his eyes stayed mostly on hers but not entirely.

A waiter came to the table and was briefly captivated by her allure until Harry said, "We would like to order now."

The waiter blinked then looked at Harry and said, "Je ne Parles Anglais."

Fleur raised an eyebrow and, in French, expressed doubt that a waiter in a major tourist spot spoke no English at all. The man flushed but repeated his assertion. She shrugged which caused the man to stare briefly at her bare breasts then she ordered, "Soupe de fruits de mer au fenouil et au thym pour commencer, un lardon Salade de Frisee, Lamb Noisette pour principal et un Brulee Creme pour le dessert pour lui, mais un éclair au chocolat pour moi." The waiter wrote down that order bowed to her and left.

Fleur said to Harry, "I ordered us seafood soup with fennel and thyme for an appetizer, a salad frisee lardon, lamb chops for entree, and a creme brulee for dessert for you but a chocolate eclair for me."

Harry nodded, "Thanks, that sounds tasty."

Soon a man came up and introduced himself as the wine steward and apologized that he had not gotten to them sooner. He was older and more diplomatic and was willing to converse with them in both French and English and he did not get caught up in Fleur's allure. Fleur told him what they had ordered and he suggested a pair of wines to go with it.

"I think a good white would go well with the soup and salad and a good red for the rest of the meal," he said.

They both nodded at that and Harry said, "Whatever wine you like Fleur."

She replied, "Even though I am French I will admit to liking a Spanish Albariño with seafood so I want to start with that then continue with your best Cabernet Sauvignon for the entree and dessert."

The wine steward bowed then said, "If you will trust my judgement I will bring the best example of both we have in our cellars."

Fleur said, "I am sure that will be fine. I look forward to your selections." The man bowed again and left.

When the wine came the man offered Harry the cork to sniff. Harry just shrugged and gestured to Fleur. She sniffed the cork the nodded and he poured her a small bit of wine in a glass which she tasted, "Bon, this will do."

The man poured them each a glass then left the bottle. Harry said, "Thanks, I don't know anything about wine."

"Well if you like this one remember the name and you can order it next time you have seafood."

Harry sipped from his glass then turned the bottle and read the label, "Palacio de Fefinanes Albarino. I'm not sure I can remember all that but I can remember that I like Albariño wines and they go well with seafood."

She smiled, "That is enough. I think I see our soup coming so you'll be able to judge for yourself whether the wine goes with it or not."

A woman brought their bowls and said, "The management apologizes if you were offended by the lack of class your previous server showed."

"I was not offended but I think my companion was," Fleur said. "So I am happy to hear you say that." She lowered her voice and in conspiratorial tones said, "Personally I was more worried about any of his drool getting in my soup."

Harry snickered at that and the waitress gave a polite smile, "Enjoy your soup, I shall return when you are done but if you need help at any time you can call me. My name is Melissande."

"Merci, Melissande," Fleur said and the woman left.

"Do you often have that problem with waiters?" Harry asked.

"More than I'd like but not often enough to stop me from dining out whenever I'm in the mood," Fleur replied.

Harry looked at his soup, "Do they always leave the shells in the soup? I don't mind, it just seems odd, they never do that back in England."

"It's thought to add flavor," she replied.

Harry nodded and tried a spoonful, he smiled, "Well it seems to have worked. This is great soup Fleur! What did you call it again?"

She said, "It is on the menu as soupe de fruits de mer au fenouil et au thym, or in English seafood soup with fennel and thyme."

"If I eat this well the whole time we are abroad I may be spoiled for traditional English fare when we return," Harry said.

"No worries about that Harry," she said. "There are good French restaurants in London, not many but some, and you can afford them."

He smiled, "True, and Grimmauld place is in London."

"And if none of your other friends are willing to accompany you to dinner call me. I am already spoiled by French food and would welcome a chance to dine on it any time and I do not like dining alone."

Harry smiled, "Surely dining alone is not a great hazard to someone who looks like you?"

She smiled back, "Perhaps not but dinner partners that don't," she paused then smirked, "well this sounds conceited but it's true. Dinner partners that can hold a conversation and don't just stare and drool are much harder to find. So you see I'd find your company worth more than even the most expensive dinner."

He blushed but looked happy, "Still you must let me pay. An English gentleman never lets a lady pay for dinner. I may not know a lot about fine dining but I do know that."

Fleur smiled, "Merci Harry, I have heard that as well so I will graciously allow this to be your treat."

After the soup came the salad. "Hey!" Harry said. "It has bacon on it! That's cool."

"That's what lardon means," Fleur said. "How are you liking the rest of it?"

"Well I'd never heard of Frisee before but I like it," Harry said.

"That is good," Fleur said. "I feel like a proper guide to French cuisine when you enjoy what I have ordered for you."

"I'm not a very picky eater," Harry said.

"So I have been told," she said. "But there is a difference between not minding a food and enjoying it."

He nodded, "I agree and I hope you are enjoying your food as well?"

She smiled, "Indeed I am M. Potter."

The main course was two small boneless lamb chops marinated in mint and lime with steamed vegetables and wild rice on the side. They both enjoyed it and afterward Harry was looking forward to dessert.

"That was amazing Fleur!" Harry said. "Do you eat like this normally?"

"Certainly not every day," she replied. "But if I am going out I want to make sure it is worth it. If I could make such things at home I fear that even my special metabolism would be overwhelmed and I would soon reach three hundred pounds." She smiled, "Non, when I cook I make simpler foods and fewer courses."

Harry laughed, "Well then somewhere along the way we may need to start doing our own cooking so as to avoid weight gain but I won't worry about it tonight. I do have to wonder why you ordered a different dessert for me than you."

"Ah, that is because creme brulee is served with flair," she said. "The top is caramelized with a small flame before serving and hopefully they will do it at the table. I thought you would like it but as for me, it is not a dessert unless it contains chocolate so I ordered the chocolate eclair."

Harry nodded, "Do you have a favorite type of chocolate?"

"Not really, I like all types," she answered.

He smiled, "I'll send you some for your birthday, when is it?"

"You don't have to get me anything Harry," she said. "But my birthday is on September 22nd. It usually falls on the autumnal equinox so that might help you remember it. When is yours?"

"Mine is on July 31st," Harry replied. "But you don't have to get me anything."

"Ah, bon then, we will each get nothing for the other!" Fleur giggled. "It will make for a lovely symmetry."

"I think you might have had a bit too much wine," Harry said.

"Possibly," she replied. "But I have you to make sure I get home safely."

"Of course," Harry said. "Ah and here come our desserts."

They did use a small torch at the table to finish his dessert and Harry smiled at that. He smiled wider later on because Fleur was attracting attention and was unaware of it. From when she first bit into her chocolate eclair she made her enjoyment clear with small moans of pleasure. As she continued to eat it she got louder until the men at nearby table could hear her. Her eyes were closed and she was clearly concentrating entirely on the food so she was oblivious to the reactions around her.

Harry saw that some of the men had women with them who were less than happy but he didn't want to interrupt Fleur and it should be over soon anyway. However he did signal the waitress, he wanted to pay now so they could leave right away if any of the men got carried away because of the added effect of her allure. The waitress seemed glad to bring him the bill and he tipped generously.

It wasn't a large pastry so she was quickly done even eating slowly and when she was finished she opened bright eyes and looked at him, "That was an excellent dessert! We need to come back here again sometime."

Harry nodded and stood, "Sure! I paid while you were enjoying your eclair so we can leave now to head back to our hotel."

"Bon," she replied and stood. She wobbled a little and grabbed his arm, "I may need to lean on you a little. I fear you were right about my having a bit too much wine."

"It's no problem," he said. "Lean on me all you like." He lead her back to the hotel and up to their suite.