Disclaimer: These characters belong to Stephanie Meyers

Chapter 4

After work on Friday, at the time we usually went to the shelter together, I paced back and forth under the bridge hoping that Carlisle showed.

Alice and Rose had agreed to help me search for him, but they had no clue how to go about looking for a homeless man. I was getting a little irritated listening to Alice's plan's for project 'ruin Bella's wedding', so around eight, I sent them on their way promising to meet the next morning for coffee.

"Sure you're okay out here," Alice asked me showing just how worried she was.

"Yeah Edward, It's cold." Rose insisted trying to pull me to my feet, but I don't want to move. I'm devastated. Something had happened to my friend and I had no idea what. Carlisle had been a father figure to me and now he's gone.

Just like that.

I run my hands down my face and huff. "I can't just leave. If he comes back and I'm not here-" I get choked up thinking about the possibility. Years together and not once had we had an incident like this. We had an understanding. We always waited for each other.

"Edward." She rubbed my arm sympathetically, which was obviously something I was going to have to get used to. She sighs heavily. "He may never come-"

"Don't say that! He's coming back." I snap angrily and watch as she exchanges a look of worry with Rose. "You two don't get it. He's all that I have. I've been alone for years and he's the only person-" It's like losing my family all over again. I'm alone under the bridge wondering if I'm even going to be missed.

"You're not alone Edward. You have us, and soon you'll have the love of your life." Alice gives me an encouraging smile that I'm unable to return.

Rose comes and pats my cheek. "We'll look again tomorrow, " She says in a friendly tone.

They start to turn to walk away when I shout. "Thank you,"They both smile at me. "Thank you both for everything,"I tell them sincerely.

"No problem at all," Rose says at the same time that Alice says, "We're friends. That's what friends are for."

I smile hoping that even if all goes south with Bella, I would still have Alice, Rose, and Jasper's friendship.

The next morning comes quickly. I search frantically for Carlisle at shelters, under bridges and then I wait by the cafe wondering if he'll show up there looking for me, knowing that I would be looking for her.

At nine, Bella comes out of the cafe looking just as beautiful as ever. Every time that I see her is like a new breath of fresh air.

I'd noticed her, Alice and Rose having coffee inside, but I was too worried about Carlisle. He had to show up at some point.

I offer Bella a kind smile that she returns with hooded eyes. She then leans against the door next to me.

"Coming in?" She asks as she toys with her necklace.

I point at the cafe with my thumb. "I'll be right in."

She continues to stand there looking at me, but she doesn't speak. She looks as if she wants to say something but doesn't know how to approach the topic in mind.

I look over at her trying to get rid of the nervousness that I feel from being near her. I get an idea as I stare into her beautiful eyes. I want time with her by myself, to get to know her. I inhale a deep breath and take a dangerous step closer to her.

Her chest visibly rises as I invade her space. Her aroma fills my nose, and I breathe her in closing my eyes to savor her. "Walk with me?" I look down into her eyes trying to dispel any of her hesitation.

I won't hurt you. I try to convey with my eyes. She stares up at me and bites her lower lip. I grip the wall above her head hovering over her trying hard not to reach out, grab her and pull her body to mine.

It takes every bit of self-control that I have not to touch her. I want nothing more than to feel her body flush against mine as I mold my lips to hers in a kiss that told her every word that I wasn't yet allowed to say.

I hoped that she could see it in my eyes. I hoped that she could feel my love surrounding her, engulfing her. I hoped my love for her overwhelmed her as much as it overwhelmed me.

Sometimes when I think of her, I suffocate at the possibility of never having my love reciprocated. I close my eyes clenching my teeth at the thought.

When I reopen my eyes, I see her head slowly nod and I smile, thankful to Alice for moments like this. Moments that I never would have had without her encouragement.

I stand taller, straighter, with my head held high. I've never been happier than I was at that very moment. I hold my arm out for her to loop with mine and she looks at it with furrowed eyebrows, confusion written all over her face.

When the realization hits her, she throws her head back with melodic laughter that makes my whole body buzz. Bella's whole face lights up and her shoulders shake with glee. My smile brightens from the joyous feeling I get from seeing her happy, from being the one that put that smile on her face.

When she stops laughing, she turns mock serious trying to stifle herself. "No way you're single," she puts her hand on her hip.

Now it's my turn to laugh. I want to say that the only woman I want is right in front of me, but I hold it back and push my arm out further for her to take. She slides hers around mine and we begin to walk.

We walk silently for a moment and it gives me time to revel in the feel of her body so close to mine.

"How did you meet Jasper,"She asks and I wince at the question not having an answer for her. I try to push the conversation away from me quickly hoping no personal questions about my life come up ever again, but I know that's unlikely.

One day I'll be able to tell her the truth, the whole truth and we may be able to overlook the way in which we met. Hopefully, she'll be deeply in love with me. So deep, in fact, that my faults won't matter to her. It's a long shot, but right now, it's my only option.

"Why don't you tell me how you met your lovely best friends," I ask her and she glances over at me with a raised eyebrow.

"Well Rose, Jasper and I met in college and Alice is my fiance's cousin so we've all been close for a long time," She says and then pauses as a thought hits her. "Funny how none of them ever mentioned you."

"I'm a very new friend of Jasper's. We only really ever had a working relationship." I say and she nods in understanding.

"Jasper is a very reserved guy. I guess you met Alice and she made it hard for your relationship with Jasper to remain professional." She assumes and I must say I like her assumption so I smile. I didn't even have to make anything up. "Alice tries to be everyone's friend."

"She's a great friend," I say softly thinking back on how gracious she's been to me. Happy that I have someone like Alice in my corner, and proud to call her friend.

"Why are you single?" She asks out of the blue, catching me completely off guard. "I just mean...you know, what's wrong with you?" She side eyes me with a smile playing on her lips.

I can't help but smile back with the thought that the most beautiful woman in the world is on my arm asking me why I'm single.

I give her a side eye and a raised eyebrow. "What makes you think that I'm single," I ask her just to see where her head is.

"You're too close to my two best friends," She says with a sigh. "No woman would allow a man as good looking as you to be that close to other women. Especially a woman that she is not close to herself. I know that I wouldn't tolerate it."

I walk quietly nodding my head at her observation. I mentally fist pump. This beautiful woman thinks me to be handsome. The same rugged man from the streets, unclean, poor and homeless.

Then I smile, glad that she believes that I'm really close to her friends. It's crazy how close we seem to have gotten in just two weeks.

"Plus Rose sort of told me. But I already knew. You carry yourself like a man that is very available." She says and I purse my lips. "You should get out there and see what the world has to offer. Get some female company. I have a few friends that I can hook you up with." She says and my heart drops. It's so easy to forget that she doesn't know how I feel about her.

I look over at her, sliding a mask to cover the hurt that I feel from her words. "I'm in great company right now." I tell her and she smiles brightly. "I'm not interested in others."

She faces forward again and I watch her face contort and change quite a bit. I wish at that moment that I could read her mind. I would give anything to get a glimpse inside of that head of hers.

I want to know what she thinks of me. I want to know if she recognizes me as the homeless man that constantly watched over her from a distance.

Loved her from a distance.

I have to know if she feels the buzz between us. She has to feel the tension. She has to feel the tugging, the pull, and the need to be around me. It can't be one-sided. It just can't be.

Another look passes over her face, and the silence begins to eat at me. Irritated and confused, unable to bear the thoughts swamping my brain, I have to hear her speak. She has to bring me out of my thoughts.

"Tell me what you're thinking." I all but demand, and she looks over at me quickly just as her breathing hitches. "I'm sorry," I say quickly trying to check myself; forgetting that she barely knows me. "I'm just trying to read you."

She looks away with a shrug. "I'm an open book."

"Yes,"I say simply and stop walking all together to look at her full on. Her eyebrows furrow as she stares at me surprised by our sudden halt. "But I'm trying to read between the lines."

"Are you suggesting that I have something to hide?" She says almost offended and this time I can't help myself. My free hand reaches up and I run the back of my hand down her face. She doesn't move away which is a good sign. Her face and body visibly calm under my touch. The last thing that I want to do is offend her.

"I'm suggesting that there is more to you than what meets the eye. I want to know the side of you that you hide from everyone else." I read her and her facial expression changes and I can tell that she's deep in thought.

I lean forward slightly as her scent wafts over me, intoxicating me.

She must feel it too because her lips part as she stares at me, and I stare at her lips. I want to claim them. I want to feel the warmth of her lips against mine.

My tongue darts out to lick my bottom lip and I watch as her chest rises and falls heavily and her eyes slide closed. The heat of her body intensifies and I can't help but think that she wants this as much as I do. She wants me. She wants to kiss me.

I'm reeling from the thought and I can't help but smile down at her beautiful face. I grab her by the nape of her neck holding firmly hoping that this is something that she wants. Praying that she doesn't regret it and never wants to see me again.

Just as my lips are approaching hers, a car horn brings us out of our bubble. Her eyes snap open and her eyes search my face before the realization of what almost happened hits her. She pulls away from me completely, trying her best to look everywhere but in my direction.

She clears her throat and busies her hands by fixing her clothes on her body. I silently curse at myself, having missed yet another chance.

"We should get back. They are probably wondering where I am." I nod in understanding even though I know that they know exactly where she is.

When we approach the door to the café, she begins to fidget and I can tell that she's slightly uncomfortable, but deep in thought. I reach up to smooth out the crease in her brow and her eyes snap to mine.

She huffs and looks away quickly. I begin to frown when I notice a change in her posture and I note her facial change. She's guarding herself now. There's a wall up that wasn't there before. I feel it as she avoids eye contact with me. She visibly changes into a different person and I hate it. I furrow my brows, craning my neck to try to catch her gaze. This angers her and it's noticeable. She takes a step back from me.

"Hey." I call in a soothing tone, but it does nothing. I'm confused as fuck. What just happened?

"I don't think you should come to dinner tonight," she says with a straight face and it's like a blow to the gut. "I'd appreciate if you didn't show up."

"Wh-," I start to ask why when she turns abruptly, disappearing into the cafe. I shove a hand through my hair as I watch her retreating form. I pull at my hair in frustration, completely confused by the events that lead to her saying that I was uninvited to dinner.

I watch her through the glass as she takes her seat by Rose. Alice looks out the window and shoots me a sympathetic look, which only makes me angrier.

Bella must have felt something. She had to...and she's running away from it.

Running away from me.

Thank you again Fran for your excellent beta skills once again. :)