Chapter 4: Earth and Zim

The night before I left, I gathered what few items I had in my cell—a change of clothes, some boots (of which I absolutely hated), and my long-distance hand-held communicator.

I put everything in my Voot Runner as I prepared for my trip. I managed to get a hold of new tools and all the standard Irken Invader equipment I would need.

The morning I left, I walked to where Tallest Red and Tallest Purple hovered as I bid them farewell. "I'm going to leave shortly," I said.

"Finally," Red muttered as he rolled his eyes and looked away.

Purple and I glared at him. Then Purple looked to me and said quietly, "I'm going to miss you."

"I know," I stated simply as I walked up the steps to the Tallest's main area. "I'll miss you too," I added as I stood in front of him.

At that moment, Tallest Purple did something he would never have done to another Irken no matter who they were. He hugged me. He just reached out and pulled me close. Thankfully, I was tall enough for my head to be resting on his stomach.

"I'm going to miss you," he repeated. I suppose he was trying to get used to that fact that I was going to be farther away from him then I've ever been.

"I'll miss you too," I said again, this time truly believing it. "I'll miss you too."

As soon as the time on my PAK said "6 AM," I put a sleeping Vee, with her Kleeshoon, in my Voot Runner and started our journey.

"Computer," I said, talking to my Voot. "Run a diagnostic. Is everything fully functional?"

"Diagnostic complete," my Computer said in its feminine voice. "Everything is fully functional."

"Good. Now," I said typing in the word 'Earth' in the route-creation program. "Find the quickest route to Earth."

Computer made a few beeping noises as it drew a route from the Massive's current position in the Sector 9 Delta to Earth. "Route calculation complete."

"Lock onto route. Start trip."

"Command confirmed. Launch sequence initiated. Flight in 3… 2… 1…" We took off. The vibrations of leaving the Massive's gravitational pull shook Vee awake.

"G'morning, Master!" she greeted me as she rubbed her eyes (which made no sense because she's a robot). "Where are we going?"

"To Earth, Vee," I told her as I turned to look at her sitting in the backseat. "We're going to Earth."

"Why?" she inquired.

"We…" I paused for a moment. "We're going to help a friend."

"Who?"

"My old friend, Zim."

"Awww…" she moaned. "This'll be boring for me, won't it, Master?"

"Not necessarily," I hesitated, thinking that Zim would probably have gotten a SIR unit too. "He has a friend waiting for you."

"Really?" She happily jumped from the backseat and landed on my head.

"Yes, now get off my head," I said, picking her up and setting her on the seat next to me. "Computer, what is our estimated time of arrival?"

"Estimated time of arrival… calculating… calculating… six months."

"Six months? That's the quickest route to Earth?"

"Yes, I just said that," my Computer stated, clearly trying to mimic sarcasm.

I was about to say something, but my Computer cut me off. "Proximity warning," it told me. "Approaching wormhole."

"A wormhole? Computer, what is a… 'wormhole'?"

"It is a shortcut through time and space."

"A… shortcut? Even we, as advanced Irkens, have not yet come up with such technology. May we go through it and leap to Earth, Computer? Do you think?"

"Uh…" my Computer hesitated. "I suppose it is possible…"

"Then let's go through it!" I said gleefully.

"But, ma'am—,"

"She said do it!" Vee shouted at the Computer.

"Okay…" Computer redirected the route so we went through the wormhole.

We entered the wormhole and nothing major changed. Just that we jumped through space and landed somewhere closer to Earth.

When we got close to the Earth, Computer said, "Proximity warning. Planet ahead."

"Computer, analyze the dominant species. I believe they're called 'humans'. Choose simple disguises for both Violet and I."

"Initiating command." The Computer started showing pictures of these 'humans' and their natural habitat. "Disguises chosen," Computer said after a few moments.

"Show me what you've chosen, Computer," I said as a picture of me and Violet popped up on screen.

On my picture, I had a simple brown wig, with ends that flipped out a little and some humanoid contacts that still showed my natural eye color, blue. I grinned as I noticed Computer had changed my shoes from standard-issue black boots to white high-tops. On Vee's picture, she had a zip-up cat outfit that was a soft pink color with little black pointed ears that curled down slightly and black nubs for hands and feet.

"Good fashion choices, Computer," I said after a moment.

"Approaching planet Earth," Computer said.

"Computer, lock onto Zim's house."

"Command confirmed. Looking for 'Zim's house'. 'Zim's house' has been found. Locking onto 'Zim's house'. Prepare for landing."

I grabbed Vee and sat her in my lap. "Ready?" I asked. She nodded.

It was dark around us as we started fall toward Earth's surface. We zoomed above houses and people until we came close to Zim's house.

The Voot gently touched down in the backyard. "Computer, give us our disguises," I whispered trying not to draw too much attention. My wig and contacts came out of a little slit by the controls and my shoes slid silently out from under the keyboards as Computer said, "Command confirmed."

"Quietly, Computer!" I scolded softly. "Vee's disguise too, Computer," I added after a moment.

"Many apologies. Creating Violet's disguise right now," Computer whispered back. After a moment, her zip-up cat outfit slid into my hands.

"Here, Vee. Put this on," I softly told her.

"Okie dokie!" she whispered as she ripped it out of my hands and stepped into it.

I put on my wig and contacts as she zipped it up. "How do we look, Computer?" I asked quietly as ripped my boots off and slid into my new shoes.

"Good," Computer whispered back.

"What time is it on Earth, Computer?" I asked as the sun started to rise.

"Seven-oh-two."

"Good, Zim should be up by now." I opened the Voot's top and stepped out. I took a deep breath. "Computer, analyze oxygen levels."

"Oxygen levels normal."

"Good," I said. I stretched and yawned. "Vee, get out here."

"Yes, Master! I obey!" She stepped out of the Voot and ran around in circles.

I sighed. "Computer, disguise the Voot. It may stay here for a while."

"Processing… processing…" The Voot projected a hologram of a giant pig.

"Now that's just stupid," I remarked to myself.

"Master, can I meet my new friend now?" Vee asked as she stopped running in circles and sat in the grass.

"Not yet. In fact, get back in the Voot and stay quiet. I need to take care of some unfinished business before you can meet your new friend," I told her.

She silently saluted me and dove head-first into the pig's mouth.

I sighed as I started toward the front door. I stood gawking at the door for a moment. It had 'Men' written in a triangle near the top of it. I shook my head, making a mental note to fix that.

I stared at the door bell, deciding whether or not I should use it, or just simply knock—but before I could do either, the door opens and who do I see standing there?

No, not Zim. A little green dog with black ears and black nubs for hands and feet.

Zim's SIR unit, I thought.

"Hi there!" it yelled at me. It seemed stupider than Vee.

"Um, hi. Is Zim here?" I asked, looking past him into Zim's base. Surprisingly, he did a pretty good job making it look nice.

"Mhmm," it stated. "MASTER!" it shouted behind him.

"What is it now, Gir?" an annoyed Zim asked, coming up from the toilet. "I want to finish my experiment before schoo—," he stopped short as he looked at me.

"Master?" the little green dog asked. "Are you okay? You look pale."

Zim ignored—what did he call it? Oh—Gir as he asked, "Tess?"

I nodded slightly.

His mouth hung agape. "Why… how… wha… when…? Um…" he stuttered.

I sighed. "It's a long story, Zim," I said as I walked past Gir into the living room. "And I'm sorry."

"For what?" Zim asked, stepping out of the toilet and into the kitchen.

"For trying to shoot you with that wankton shoon a while back," I said as I sat on the couch.

"Oh, that. I forgave you a long time ago for that," he said. It was unusual for Zim to say or do such things, but he always had his moments.

He walked through the kitchen and into the living room. He stood in front of me as he continued. "What are you doing here? Visiting the ALMIGHTY ZIM?" he asked, making fists and shoving them up in the air as he said his name.

"I'm not visiting you, Zim."

He flinched as I said his name.

"I'm here to help you."

He crossed his arms disbelievingly. "Why? Do you think Zim needs help conquering a simple planet? Do you? DO YOU?" He shoved his face in mine.

I pushed him away from me. "No, I… I was sent by the Tallest," I said, daring no more.

"But why?" Zim inquired.

"I…" I couldn't bring myself to say it—that this was my punishment. "They… they thought you might want companionship?" I winced and closed both eyes as I held my breath, knowing he would almost surely see through the lie.

"That…" he hesitated. "That's very nice of them," he said quietly.

Author's Note: Sorry if there were any spelling/gramatical errors in this chapter! If there is, tell me, please! I was up LATE finishing this one because I wanted to know what would happen. Isn't that sad? When the author wants to know what happens next in her own story? Oh well. I am normal, ya know. I'M NORMAL! *looks over shoulder* Did anyone hear that? Or was it just Joey? I'M NORMAL, I SAY! NORMAL!