Twilight: Truth or Dare: Episode 4
RATING: T for mild language and violence and whatnot
WARNING: I do not own Twilight… obviously
EMILY: 7-ish reviews since our last show! Whoohoo!
JACOB: Get over yourself.
EMILY: Don't worry. There were some pretty good ones for you in there.
JACOB: *horrified look*
EMILY: Anywho, let's jump right in again. I could pick one to start with, since they were all so good, so I'll just go in the order they were went in. First off is from Kyranicle:
I shall dare Edward to lap dance Alice!
And I want the truth from Rose if she's ever kissed another boy during her and Emmetts relationship! :D
Also! I dare Jacob to KISS EDWARD ON THE LIPS! (Tell Jacob that if he or Edward say no, that I know where they live! Hehe...)
Eh, what te heck! I want the truth from Jasper if he's ever had "dirty thoughts" about someone other than Alice!
I hope you put that taser to good use on these truths and dares! ;)
P.S. Tell Edward I think he's hot!
EMILY: *evil look*
CARLISLE: …Well, it's nice someone's having fun over here.
Edward sighs and gets up as the rest of the cast watches, unsure whether to be excited or horrified. Alice sees what he's going to do as he warms up beforehand, the appalled look on her face only rousing the guest up more. Finally Edward does his dare and quickly runs back to his seat to hide his embarrassment.
BELLA: I can't believe you just did that in front of me.
ALICE: I can't believe I had to see you do that twice.
EDWARD: If it helps, Alice was thinking that I should've been you the whole time.
BELLA: It doesn't. As tempting as the idea is, you looked very professional out there, leading me to believe that it wasn't your first. Rosalie and I have secretly joined forces to find this dirty Kristen girl and teach her a lesson.
EDWARD: Oh, for the love of—
ESME: *changing the subject* Rosalie, it's your turn.
ROSALIE: Oh, yeah. What was my truth again?
EMMETT: You're supposed to say if you kissed another guy during our relationship.
ROSALIE: Ah. Can I lie to you?
EMMETT: If you think it'll make things better.
ROSALIE: Okay, good. Because I've absolutely never kissed, if fact, I haven't even checked out any other man except for you.
EMMETT: Well, that's a relief!
Beat.
EMMETT: Wait, was that the lie?
EMILY: Okay, I'll take that. Next up, Jake and Eddie!
BOTH: No.
EMILY: Apparently the viewer knows where you live.
JACOB: Like that scares me. There is absolutely no way I'll kiss that thing.
EDWARD: My thoughts exactly.
EMILY: I suppose you're right. I mean, why kiss when you can always—
EDWARD: Okay, stop right there! And I read your mind, and I don't like where it's going.
JACOB: Why? What was she thinking?
EDWARD: If I told you, you'd probably kill yourself.
BELLA: Oh, just shut up and kiss already!
BOTH: How can you say that?
BELLA: You're both such wimps. Besides, maybe this is just the thing you need to start getting along together.
JACOB: Or just the thing to traumatize us for the rest of our lives.
EDWARD: …You better have brushed your teeth this morning.
Edward and Jacob awkwardly get close, when Bella steps in and shoves their faces together because it was taking too long. Right away they break apart and begin making faces accompanied by odd gurgling noises.
EDWARD: I have to go wash my mouth out. Now.
JACOB: Same.
They both run into the bathroom to go do so.
JASPER: In that case, I shall take this opportunity to say that, unlike all these other cheating couples, maybe aside from Caslisle and Esme, Alice and I remain loyal to each other.
ALICE: That's just because I'd know if you were going to try something.
JASPER: Well, yeah. That too.
EMILY: You guys are boring. *tases Jasper for no reason whatsoever*
ALICE: What was that for?
EMILY: It's not my fault! They said to put the taser to good use and I hadn't done so yet!
JASPER: *struggling to get back up* That was good use?
EMILY: …Maybe not. I didn't expect Edward and Jacob to do theirs.
ESME: They're sure taking a long time to get back. Do you think they're okay?
ARO: *calling to them* Hey, get back in here! She's gonna read the next review!
BOTH: Then we'll take our time.
JANE: Wimps.
EMILY: Here's one from TeamSteward05:
My truth is for Bella...if you could only save Edward or Jacob from death who would you save?
My Dare is for Jasper I dare you to kiss Rosalie
BELLA: I actually don't think I could really save either of them myself… but if it's about picking? I don't know. That's not really a fair question. I mean, I love Edward, but I couldn't live with myself if I let Jacob…
EMILY: Let's find out! *shoots a bazooka that seems to have appeared out of nowhere towards the bathroom*
EDWARD AND JACOB: What the—
BELLA: *girlfriend instincts kick in* No, Edward! I'll save you! *races towards the bathroom*
EMILY: Well, there you go. *fondling bazooka* Now, I wonder where this came from?
A couple minutes later, they both stagger in rather bruised and pissed off.
JACOB: Uncalled for!
EDWARD: I know shooting us with a bazooka was not in the dare!
SAM: How'd they know it was a bazooka?
EMILY: Hey, don't be mad at me! Quick, Jasper, kiss Rosalie before they can hate me even more!
BOTH: We already hate you with passion.
Jasper, relieved that he at least wasn't in any yaoi pairing, kisses Rosalie. Who then punches him in the face.
JASPER: Hey, it was a dare!
ROSALIE: I know that.
EMILY: Okay, next up is from Autumnlovesvampyres:
Ok for my truth and dare!
Truth is for Edward. Do you think your sexy?
Dare is for Aro. I dare you to sing to Justin beiber while wearing a dress. Mwahahahaaha. Sorry.
Oh! You guys rock! (;
EDWARD: Um, duh.
BELLA: Edward!
EDWARD: But it's true.
JACOB: God, what a narcissist.
EDWARD: Oh, I'm the narcissist? Don't you think you're sexy?
JACOB: Well, of course! I'm definitely the sexiest person in this whole stupid game! Of course, I already knew that, but it's nice to hear it from you.
EDWARD: I never meant—
EMILY: Guys, guys! Break it up. Aro, would you please step into the bathroom, as changing in front of us wasn't part of the dare? You'll find the dress Edward was wearing earlier on a hanger. Hopefully it'll fit you.
ARO: Damn you. *walks away melodramatically*
EMILY: And while he's doing that, Autumn, don't be sorry. The maniacal laugh is key, and a lot of good bad guys forget that, so I have to respect you for it. At least that's what I learned from Dr. Horrible, and of course you have to believe everything you read on the internet, right?
ALL: Uh…
A little while later Aro bursts into the room wearing a princess ball gown and using a toothbrush as a microphone.
ARO:
There's gonna be one less lonely girl
I'm coming for you
One less lonely girl
I'm coming for you
One less lonely girl
I'm coming for you
One less lonely girl
I'm coming for you
There's gonna be one less lonely girl
I'm coming for you
I'm gonna put you first
I'm coming for you
I'll show you what you're worth
That's what I'm gonna do
If you let me inside your world
There's gonna be one less lonely girl
ALL: *staring in disbelief*
ARO: What?
CAIUS: I'm concerned that you know the lyrics.
ARO: Well, they're not that hard?
MARCUS: *shaking his head in shame*
EMILY: Okay, I think we can manage to squeeze in one more today. Here's Eeddwwaarrddiloveya's:
I dare Jacob to get tasered 10 times
for truth I want Edward to tell bella rly how much you love her!I hope you and Bella are the happiest couple on earth.
I love you Edward but if bella makes you happy then behappy w/ her.
BELLA: Wow. People really love Edward.
EDWARD: Yes, but that doesn't matter to me, but they could never love me as much as I love you. I don't care how many times Kristen or Jacob tries to step in between us, or how many times this evil director sticks me in a dress or makes me demonstrate yaoi, it's you I'll always love. Bella, I love you. I know you'll find it hard to believe me if I tell you now how much you mean to me. I could hardly understand what I feel for you, knowing how to endure those long sleepless nights just thinking only of you. I've never been like this before. I just don't know how to pour out my feelings for you. I wanted to find the perfect words to make you realize how much I need you and love you, but words continue to elude me, what would they be? Something poetic? I'm sure it should be heartfelt and out of the ordinary. I'm afraid it's no use; every time I look at you, the words come out the same: I love you!
BELLA: Oh, Edward! *huggles*
ARO: …Did he seriously just get that last part from ?
JACOB: *being tases repeatedly the background*
EMILY: I'm glad this ended on a happy note. Until next time!